Michael DeLuise credited as playing...
Matt
- Matt Wilson: [after Matt and his goons have Dave hanging from a bulletin board at school] Robyn wouldn't piss on your gums if your teeth were on fire.
- Dave: [helplessly] Yes, she would.
- Matt Wilson: [he and his goons laugh] SHOOOOOOSH! Hush, please! Showing your ignorance again, Morgan! Some of us pump...
- [the goons fist bump each other]
- Matt Wilson: and some of us slump. You should try some pump, Morgan. It might clear up your acne.
- Dave: [Matt begins to write on Dave's forehead with a magic marker] N-no. Stop... stop it!
- Matt Wilson: [Matt's goons laugh as he continues] Why do you make me do this?
- Dave: What're you writing? Hey! What did you write!
- Dave: [Matt finishes writing "EAT ME" and taps Dave's forehead hard with the marker... he walks to the fire alarm and pulls it] Matt... NOT THE FIRE ALARM! MATT! MATT!
- Matt Wilson: [Matt bursts in at the prom just as Link is about to be crowned prom king] WAIT!
- [shoves through the crowd towards the stage]
- Matt Wilson: WAIT!
- [he shoves Link back]
- Student Announcing Prom King: What're you trying to do, Matt? Come on, stop it!
- [Matt takes the crown from him and shoves him back as well]
- Matt Wilson: [takes microphone] This is our school, right?
- [students murmur in affirmation]
- Matt Wilson: And we have a right to know if something is bogus that's going down in our school, right?
- [the murmurs continue, he points to Link]
- Matt Wilson: And someone right here has taken you for a ride!
- [Link grabs Matt's finger, Matt yanks it away]
- Matt Wilson: His name isn't Linkavitch Chumovsky and he's not from Estonia.
- Robyn Sweeney: Matt, will you just stop this already!
- Matt Wilson: [to Robyn] SHOOOOOOOSH! Trust me.
- [back to the crowd]
- Matt Wilson: They've all been lying to us! But I found out... I know the truth. Do you want to know the truth?
- [students shout affirmatively]
- Matt Wilson: Do YOU want to know what he REALLY IS?
- [students shout affirmitavely again]
- Matt Wilson: He's a caveman.
- [Link nods and walks forward, smiling... students cheer for him, Matt stares at the crowd in disbelief]
- Matt Wilson: No... NO! Look... he's a freak! I got pictures!
- Dave: [Dave and Stoney burst in and rush to the stage, Dave tries to take the pictures from Matt, the cheers continue] NO!
- Matt Wilson: [waving pictures] SEE?
- Dave: Let me see them! Give me those pictures! Matt give me those!
- Matt Wilson: [punches Dave] No!
- Robyn Sweeney: Dave!
- Link: [calling out to Matt, who's pummeling Dave at the hockey rink] Wheeze the juice!
- Matt Wilson: [Matt stops and turns to Link] HEY! You wanna a piece of me?
- Matt Wilson: [Matt skates up to Link] I don't know you, I don't like you. As of now, I'm all over you.
- [Matt punches Link in the face]
- Matt Wilson: [after Matt has punched Dave at the prom, knocking him into the crowd, Link bows 'Karate Kid' style before him... Matt is clearly off-guard] What are you doing, fag?
- Matt Wilson: [Link head-butts Matt and picks him up in a fireman-style carry, spins him around and throws him towards the crowd, Matt lands in the prom cake] Hey! Heeeeyyy! No, no, NO!
- [crowd cheers for Link]