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The Fall Guy (2024)
A movie with first two acts all over the place and a third act trying to tie it all together
I prefer to review movies as a whole but the lines between the acts in this movie are so obvious that sort of renders reviewing this movie as a whole impossible. Also the quality difference between the acts is so evident that reviewing the movie as a whole wouldn't do justice, to the last act that is.
First act, we are introduced to the characters. And you better believe me when I say that the movie takes its sweet time with the first act. It takes too long and provides too little in the great scheme of things. I can't see the general audience enjoying this at all however this act is likely to prove to be more bearable if you're into production side of movies.
Second act, the movie's entire tone suddenly changes with one phone call and it becomes a murder mystery. Now, the problem here is apparent. We have a case at hand but why should the audience care about it? There are better movies out there with more intriguing mysteries. No one's going to buy a ticket to the Fall Guy for the murder mystery element. The movie itself didn't advertise itself a murder mystery either. It was advertised as a RomCom and an Action movie. However, the movie barely delivers its promises up until the last act.
Romance is surely there but there are times it feels too forced. You know how the saying goes, "Show, don't tell.". Well, while the chemistry between Ryan Gosling and Emily Blunt is clearly there, there are times in the movie where they try too hard to sell it and it comes off as superficial. Regarding other elements, comedy and humor is barely there. It is rather dry in that regard and action, well, let's cover that in our review of the third act.
Third act is clearly the saving grace of this movie. You can sort of see it coming halfway through the second act and it really is "bombastic". But does it really make up for the two lacking acts of the movie? Well, see the movie for yourself and be the judge of that.
Lost (2004)
One of a kind
TLDR: LOST, starts out as a typical show where survivors from a plane crash just try to get by on the island they are stranded on but it really branches into a show that's literally impossible to recreate from that point.
First season is actually pretty weak compared to the others. It has a lot of fillers where our characters just hunt, collect water etc. Basically doing chores to survive on the island where the main mystery of island goes pretty untouched until last few episodes but the wait is worth it.
Second season only adds onto the first and offers us a better experience and so does the third. By now, plot wise, the show's roots are very branched and deep into the soil and the characters wise, it is the same. This show has very strong and solid characters to offer.
Season four, in my opinion, is where the show reaches its peak. I think, why I feel this way is both related to how most pieces come together during this season and three seasons of build up finally pays and also because this season is considerably shorter than the first three therefore there isn't really any fillers.
First half of season five is really a mess. Really, the show didn't need it and would have been mostly fine in the continuum of things if it didn't exist. By the middle of it, this season grabs the audience once again but goes downhill from there through the season finale. Still, it has its moments.
Season six is basically the consequence of creating a show this complex with branching story lines. They have to wrap up but there are so many stories that they can't wrap all of them so this season consists a lot of what I'd call "happy coincidences" and it is a bit rushed. My opinions of finale is that characters are wrapped up mostly alright but some plot elements, including major ones, from previous seasons were just disregarded almost as if they never existed to begin with. As a more of a plot-intrigued viewer myself, I was a bit disappointed but it is really hard to come by a show like this again so I think 9/10 will do it.
Mr. Robot (2015)
DEXTER with hacking, but much worse
This show is what happens when you take a half-baked idea which should have been a movie and stretch it into 4 seasons long TV series. When you first watch the pilot and then watch the second episode, the quality difference is extremely obvious. What they should have done is that add another hour to the pilot on par with its quality and make this into a movie but instead we got this show full of plot-holes. Because plot-holes are what happens when you take a well-thought but a small idea and stretch to a point where it almost tears apart. Then cue in the nonsense plot-twists they throw around to cover those plot-holes. When I look around, all I see is people praising this show for being as realistic as possible with its hacking stuff but what those people fail to see is that hacking process is the only thing that makes sense in this show. Nothing else makes sense. Creators probably looked at DEXTER and wanted that fame but their idea wasn't fit for a long-term show.
Obi-Wan Kenobi (2022)
Such a surprise!
Just when I thought now the new Star Wars shows couldn't get any worse than the Boba Fett so we were safe, they just got a lot more worse! My mind simply can not comprehend how they can botch a show about Obi-Wan, arguably most people's favourite Star Wars character. I really mean it, making a show about him and having the majority of the public dislike should really take a huge talent. I don't want to repeat every other reviewer, their points are all right. The inquisitor lady and kid Leia are huge issues also yes, chase sequence is probably one of the worst sequences I have ever seen in a show/movie and Disney should be ashamed of themselves for greenlighting this at all.
The Northman (2022)
You DON'T make an arthouse film out of the VIKINGS!
And then proceed to market it as an epic bloody viking tale! This movie barely has any action in it and the actions scenes are not even anything special. It can be clearly observed that they wanted to put some weight in the action scenes and make every swing of weapon count and feel heavy but it just looks stupid. This movie is the sort of an old epic you'd expect to read in a literature book, definitely not an action movie. Other than that, the set up takes way too long for a movie, perhaps they should have considered making this a series since movie is filled with bunch of cuts and titlecards for change of setting anyway. Second act takes even longer than the set up building a huge hype for the finale and then comes the finale. It's honestly pretty alright except for the fact that our protagonist is covered with plot armor. Then there is no closure to anything at all, it just thankfully ends after taking its way too generous time.
The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent (2022)
Whether or not you are a Cage fan, you are in for a treat.
First of all, it is great to see Nick Cage working with such actors like Pedro Pascal who can not only keep up with Cage's screen presence but also enhance it. Secondly, as I have stated in the title, you'll enjoy this experience regardless if you are a fan of the man or not but if you are a fan, then you'll be very glad to see that the film has many nods to Cage's evolving filmography throughout the years. In the end, movie is both a cheesy (and well aware of itself) and a special thing that's not like any other comedy movie.
The Batman (2022)
Never have I ever would have thought that one day, I'd wish a superhero movie to stop being a pretentious art movie and just be formulaic instead.
After reading what critics' had to say for this movie, I literally laughed out loud saying; "It's Batman! Of course it is going to be dark! Imagine complaning that 95% of the movie takes place at night time... You dorks..." but holy hell do I agree with them. This movie is literally so long, boring and dark that I forced myself to not fall asleep. It feels like they forgot to edit and trim the movie since this movie could easily be just 2 hours instead of 3. Movie doesn't commit to anything, it is neither a detective or an action movie. I know some people are going to jump here and say that's exactly what Batman is; half detective-half superhero. I know, I know but half-commitment simply doesn't work in this movie. Why should I watch this over Se7en or Zodiac? Just why? The detective stuff in this movie is so subpar, they spend the entire movie trying to figure out what "La Rata Alada" means... Speaking of riddles, the main villain is extremely shallow. It is such a disrespect what they've done to Riddler. He is literally a mentally handicapped fellow who's desperate for some attention that he asks his followers to like and subscribe... We've talked about the villain, now let's talk about our protagonist, Batman. Yes, just Batman because there is no Bruce Wayne persona in this movie. Batman is Bruce Wayne and Bruce Wayne is Batman. I get what they've gone for, an inexperienced Batman but this broody Batman just doesn't work. Don't even get me started on his plot armor. I mean, a literal bulletproof plot armor. Batman only gets hurt once in this movie during the climax and that's about it. He doesn't even flinch as bullets hit his armor.
Dexter: New Blood: Sins of the Father (2022)
Left me speechless... In a bad way.
I guess it was too late when writers realized that they only had 1 episode left after they wrapped up the Kurt Caldwell storyline and now they needed some quick closure and rushed this episode like no tomorrow. This episode is an insult to the entirely of Dexter New Blood. First the original final episode of Dexter and now this... At this point I'd say that Dexter writers have some sort of weird attraction to creating most awful finales in the history of filmmaking.
Arcane: League of Legends (2021)
I haven't seen this many one-dimensional characters in one place before
Jesus Christ, watching the show after reading all these reviews I was expecting a masterpiece and you can't blame me for that because apparently pretty much every single person here thinks that this show is on par with Breaking Bad in terms of its rating. It saddens me to say this because I really wanted to like the show as an avid player of the game but it is just shallow, subpar and predictable. Characters are so stereotypical that they are literally dictionary definitions. The only character that's interesting is Viktor and so far he wasn't really getting the screentime he deserves. Other characters' storylines are boring and not just because we already know where they will end up because of the game, they are just poorly written. After all these, I don't get the 9.4 rating, it is probably boosted by some bots or whatever. Just another video game adaptations that shoots for the skies and fails. If this exact show was released as the first debut of the world of Runeterra and if LoL fanbase wasn't a thing; this show wouldn't have made it past 8/10.
Star Wars: Visions (2021)
George Lucas isn't even dead yet but he is already rolling in his grave after having his name attached to this project.
Let me start with a simple question, what is this? I quit watching halfway through the third episode because I just couldn't take it anymore. And my problem isn't even the anime style or anything like that. This is simply not Star Wars. When I first heard about Star Wars: Visions, I thought "Oh! A Star Wars anime. Sounds nice." but seeing how it turned out it is more of an anime that has Star Wars shoehorned into it. That's not the only problem either. Episodes are simply terrible and the IMDb ratings for each episode speak for their own anyway, just go check them. First episode pulls a reverse TLJ by making a second saber appear out of thin air instead of making it disappear, second episode is... I honestly don't even know what to say about it. Why should I even care emotionally about some kid and his band that I just met 5 minutes ago? Also their song is nothing extraordinary so it is literally an insult to Queen. Third episode has humans that can breathe in space without any helmet and I am pretty sure the list goes on because I quit halfway through the third episode as I have said.
Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (2021)
Starts as a strong martial arts movie but ends as a cliche, formulaic Marvel movie.
I really liked how the movie started and went in a certain direction for like the first hour but after that point, the movie suddenly becomes a lot more mystical and decides to sway from its direction which did more harm than good to the movie in my opinion. By the end, I just wanted to watch some cool looking, well choreographed hand-to-hand fight scenes but what I got was characters "kamehameha"ing each other and gigantic beasts fighting along. But I guess I can't complain, I knew what I was going to get since this is a MCU movie after all.
Er ist wieder da (2015)
The Adolf Hitler "Comedy" Movie.
First of all, this movie is definitely not comedy. And no, it is not a dark comedy either. You sure do laugh watching the movie but none of those laughs are pleasant laughs like watching any other comedy movie. They are all guilty pleasure laughs. Watching this movie, you are more than just the audience observing the events of this world from as a third party; you are more of a person in Germany witnessing the return of Hitler and watching the things unravel. That is your point of view in this movie. Think of yourself as a person in the audience laughing at Hitler as he is giving his performance because you are no different than them. You laugh at him even though you know what a terrible person he is. People at the audience also laugh at him so you are not alone but you know that he is being for real when he talks instead of being an extreme method-actor unlike the audience. I hate to say it but unfortunately that is how captivating he is. And this movie proves us that even though we knew what a terrible person Hitler is, I believe still most of us got captivated by him and you need to admit it. We are susceptible. If even Hitler was able to come back to life and still manage to captivate an audience; then we as human kind is in really deep trouble.
12 Years a Slave (2013)
I really don't see what is so special about this movie.
Like seriously, can someone elaborate what so many people saw in this movie? Because I don't think we watched the same movie. The movie I watched had no plot and it was nothing but 2 hours and 14 minutes of boredom. Yes, I understand the message it is trying to tell the audience but there are a lot of movies with the same message and a better quality. Your message doesn't give you the right to make your movie shallow like this.
Gisaengchung (2019)
I hate to say it but...
The only reason this movie got the fame and awards it got is because it is a korean movie. And let me be clear here, not just specifically korean but literally any non-US movie on par with Parasite in terms of quality would have been as successful as Parasite anyway; with a bit of luck of course. Actually not just a bit of luck; they would need all the stars in universe to align as well because that's what happened with Parasite. It is nothing but an average movie that only got this boosted because some people decided to take a look outside the rock they have been living under for over decades and they saw this average movie and thought "That's a lot better than what I expected!". Domino effect followed and today, we got this movie that's overrated and predictable. No different than your average "ThRiLLeR" movie.
P. S.: The only reason I went this hard on the movie is because the internet went so good on it and the movie got more than it deserved anyway so keep calm, the movie is still watchable; when drunk.
Community (2009)
Best Sitcom Ever. Hands Down.
Community starts off as your classic sitcom with stereotypical characters but near the end of season one, it shows you how further it is willing to go as a sitcom with its famous paintball episode. Its characters evolve from just being stereotypical representatives to closest thing to a real person. It keeps getting better and better the more you watch; at least until season four. That's where things start collapsing with the firing of Dan Harmon, the creator of the show and afterwards nothing was like they used to be once. Even though they get Harmon back in season five, the wheels still don't work perfectly because of the absence of Chevy Chase (no matter how much you wanna hate him, Pierce played a very big part in what made Community work) and Donald Glover. They tried to replace those characters but it just didn't work. It was a hopeless attempt and they knew it. Anyway conclusion here is that the first three seasons are the perfect sitcom ever and afterwards you will be already too attached to the characters that no matter how bad some episodes in season four might get you will keep on watching. Season five and six are okay but they aren't really a match for the first three. And finally in the end, your dedication to the show will pay off with the greatest series finale of all sitcoms and it justifies everything.
1917 (2019)
Just another movie that's overrrated because it is an "achievement" for the film industry
Oh god... A one shot movie?! Oh my... So revolutionary... Brilliant... Brilliant! Wait you are telling me that the movie is not actually one-shot but it is made to look like it is one-shot since shooting a one-shot movie is impossible? Well then what about "Victoria (2015)" which is THE TRUE ONE-SHOT MOVIE? At least I hope the connections between cuts look perfectly seamless, that's the case with 1917 right?.. Right? No? You are telling me that the cuts are so obvious even a toddler can notice where they are? Then what is the point of this so called "technical achievement"? Really, did we come to a point in filmmaking where just camera work on its own guarantee you a spot in the list of "Highest Rated Movies of All Time"?
Conclusion: This movie is nothing but glorified camera work and some generic war movie with checkpoints.
Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy (2011)
It just works.
I know this is going to sound extremely unprofessional as a review but ever notice how you sometimes see a movie and in the end you enjoy it a lot but can't explain why; yeah this movie was one of those movies for me. Give it a watch and you won't regret it.
Your Honor (2020)
Only if the entire show was as good as the pilot...
You know there is something wrong with the show when you spend more time finding plotholes than enjoying the story.
Locke (2013)
Ever notice how a movie suddenly ends because you were too into it and time just flew by...
Yeah this is one of those movies. The premise is extremely simple and it is a pure dialogue movie yet as someone who more often than not despises dialog heavy movies; this movie always had my full attention. By the time movie was over I was left wanting more.
Sen to Chihiro no kamikakushi (2001)
One of the worst moves I've ever seen my entire life
Actually you know what? I wouldn't even qualify this abomination as a movie. It is an art gallery and a very boring one. This is supposed to be movie industry, not some fancy art gallery therefore just because you liked the art style doesnt make it the best animated movie ever. The plot is very lame and you must have truly low standards if you like the plot and story it tells. And art style isn't even good. It is just randomly generated.
Boss Level (2020)
First 20 mins is 10/10, rest.. not so much.
I see what happened with this movie, they wanted to make the entire movie like the first 20 minutes but realized they were already over half of their budget when they finished shooting the first 20 minutes and so they had to cram bunch of stupid scenes in the movie to make it qualify as a feature film.
Don't listen to other reviews saying this is Crank + Groundhog Day and claiming every second of this movie is full of action. Surprise surprise.. It is not. The conversations in this movie takes more time than the action scenes especially and they are not even intriguing in any form of dialogue. Dialogues are full of stupidly long tales/metaphores to keep them going for even longer. Jeez.. I am not here to watch Sorkin, I just wanted to watch a movie where I could turn off my brain and enjoy...
Hachi: A Dog's Tale (2009)
This is one of those movies...
Ever notice how you watch a movie every once in a while that's so simple yet so effective and it leaves a big impact on you? Yeah, Hachi is probably the prime example of those movies. It is so basic yet so touching.
The Haunting of Bly Manor (2020)
Disappointing.
This miniseries shares the same problem with Tenet; it is convoluted and complicated just for the sake of it. When you first see the twist you are like, well i guess this can be fun and intriguing but it becomes boring too quick. Also accents are goddamn horrible. You dont need to be british or scottish to see that accents are perfectly horrendous. Also there are some problems with the story like what happened to the moon glasses guy, Dani's fiance? After Dani and gardener did it he just vanished. Why didnt the lady in the lake kill Dani? She literally killed anyone in her grasp under a goddamn second but for some reason she didnt kill Dani and just dragged her. Whatever as improfessional as it may sound and as you get it this miniseries is simply disappointing and I dont want to talk about it anymore.
The Room (2003)
THE PERFECT SCORE FOR THE PERFECT MOVIE
Hello There
If I could give this movie the one and only true perfect score 5/7 I could but since in IMDB you can rate movies out of 10 I've done the maths and the equivalent of perfect score a.k.a. 5/7 is 6.42857142857 out of 10. And since that number is a quite a little bit smaller than 6.5 I will be rating this movie 6/10.
Thank you.
Midsommar (2019)
When will people understand there is no such genre as ''Psychological Horror'' ?
Hello there
I see that Midsommar depends on psychological horror aspect heavily as a horror movie but the thing is we got a problem here. Psychological horror can not be the main theme of a movie and can only and only be a side aspect of the movie make it better. Just like the ''Red Room'' scene from ''Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark'' or maybe ''Spahn Movie Ranch'' scene from ''Once Upon a Time in Hollywood''. Psychological horror works with these 2 titles because in Scary Stories everything is just clear, you know there is something wrong and you know how that scene will end but you keep watching, it frightens you slowly and slowly. And in OUATIH, the movie itself is far from what you'd call a psychological horror but Spahn Movie Ranch scene is a standalone scene that's main focus is psychological horror that is thrown to the middle of a movie and when everything was going fine you just get that scene and it does what it is supposed to do and frightens you very well. But in such movies like ''Midsommar'', aka in movies which has psychological horror as its theme, it just doesn't work because you know that there is something wrong there. Let me give you a metaphorical example to understand it better. Think it like you are in the universe of ''Cabin in the Woods'' and participating in the events as a spectator. There is a one sided mirror between you and the victims. You just watch ''scientists'' release the monsters upon the victims and they die. They were the ones who did not know that something wrong was going to happen. And in a real movie it works exactly the same; You are the audience and you know there are some stuff that is wrong but the characters in the movie don't.
And when there are some stuff wrong you just prepare yourself as the audience. Unless the movie is very successful about making you feel for the characters and have some empathy for them you won't really have any psychological anxiety when something happens in the movie because you were waiting for that anyway. You knew that there were some wrong stuff happening around everywhere in the whole movie before that point so you were prepared for it. How is that supposed to give you psychological anxiety or whatever it is? Also this movie is way too long and which makes it predictable because you will have time to predict every possible outcome and then pick the one that makes the most sense (which is not very hard to choose tbh). Pretty sure they thought if they make the movie overly long and slow it would help to create that ''psychological horror and anxiety'' world they wanted to build for the movie but no luck, not this time.
EDIT: Forgot the sex scenes of the movie. Lmao what was that cmon.. I really don't know what director was thinking when he decided to do that. Everyone in my saloon was basically laughing hysterically at those scenes. They absolutely did not stand for anything else but just some great chuckles. Gotta give it to it tho, was the best chuckle I had in a movie this year.
I don't accept psychological horror as the main theme of a movie so this movie belongs to no genre at all. There is no mystery in the movie because movie is way too easy to predict thanks to its runtime. There is no other horror elements other than some heavy gore in 2 scenes and some ''psychological'' horror elements so it is not a horror movie as well. I don't even know what this movie is... But damn sure it is something overy long, predictable and slow.