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Knock at the Cabin (2023)
M night gets worse every time
If you think M night can't write an ending, then wait to the ending of this movie. Cause you're right. A half decent premise ruined by a Man who has worse vision that early 90's cyclops. M Night wasting investors money yet again in another lame ass attempt to make a blockbuster, 2 gay dads raising their adopted asian daughter, who thanks modern family are now the last defense against the apocalypse because, um who I don't know we never find out Dave Bautista's manager I guess? Either way he will butcher all his so called friends as well as himself to save the world by killing either one of the girls dads or the daughter and then the remaining character can peer into the sunset...Not kidding this is exactly what happens.
Day Shift (2022)
Thought the script was AI generated
Take every B-grade vampire movie and consolidate it into one. The only thing that stands out about this movie is I managed to make it through until the end. I was so sure that the script was generated by AI I actually went and looked up the screenwriters. Needless to say I was not pleasantly surprised.
The Gray Man (2022)
Terrible
Plot straight out of a cereal box, bland acting and over saturated action scenes. Not worth the time spent watching. Pretty sure this was made to launder drug money because it doesn't make sense otherwise.
Star Trek: Picard: The Star Gazer (2022)
Here we go again
Well, it's better than discovery. But so is being punched in the nuts by a midget so it is not saying much. Seems to gloss over the fact that picard is now an android that everyone seems to have forgotten, style over substance as is usual now days.
The King's Man (2021)
Boring unoriginal garbage.
Turned it off half way through the fight scene with Rasputin. If you're going to re write history at least make an effort. Unoriginal plot and action with an amazingly bad script. It may as well be a MCU movie because thats what it is trying to be. Not worth the time it takes to watch.
Wolf (2021)
Beyond Bad
I'm sorry I can't even write an actual review for this it was so bad that I my only Christmas wish is for Santa to bash my head into a sweet nothingness. Another one that needs negative reviews -7/10.
The Wheel of Time (2021)
How to ruin a great story
Adapt it so it is "ON MESSAGE"....
Come on Hollywood you literally had the story laid out for you to follow, but you ruin it from the start with Misandry. (Yes we get it female good and strong, men bad and weak hurr durr).
Series is rushed with poor acting, dialogue and some questionable cgi, not to mention the addition of new characters solely for the reason of "The Message" that add nothing to the story as well as diverging from the books.
Pretty sure Robert Jordan is rolling over in his grave right now.
The Wheel of Time (2021)
How to ruin a great story
Adapt it so it is "ON MESSAGE"....
Come on Hollywood you literally had the story laid out for you to follow, but you ruin it from the start with Misandry. (Yes we get it female good and strong, men bad and weak hurr durr).
Series is rushed with poor acting, dialogue and some questionable cgi, not to mention the addition of new characters solely for the reason of "The Message" that add nothing to the story as well as diverging from the books.
Pretty sure Robert Jordan is rolling over in his grave right now.
Night Teeth (2021)
Nicki Minaj of vampire movies
No style or substance. Main characters a 40 y.o.looking 25 y.o. Carrying a backpack to school, rest of the movie is written just as well. 2 dimensional garbage not worth the time spent watching.
Midnight Mass (2021)
Sloooooow
Well written interactions but the pacing is so slow that you could watch paint dry twice. The interactions between characters are the saving grace making them feel real and valid.
Spiral: From the Book of Saw (2021)
Chris Rock angry and yelling.
Title pretty much sums up most the movie. The rest just felt like a poorly written saw movie with less saw but considering who the two writers are I didn't expect much else.
Kills an hour and a half of your time and lets face it you're not going anywhere thanks to Covid anyway.
Solos (2021)
Rather boring.
Some big name actors trying (some better than others), to make the most out of poorly written scripts with low budgets. Only managed to sit through 2 entire episodes that almost put me to sleep while the rest got skipped through after a few minutes.
The Irregulars (2021)
Not even worth 2 episodes
You will never get the time back so don't garbage zoomer tv.
Solar Opposites (2020)
Lame
Wow is Rick and Morty delayed due to this...I can't even.....
The Walking Dead: World Beyond (2020)
Beyond me how this made it past pilot....
Utterly terrible. Not going to bother saying anything more.
50 States of Fright (2020)
5 mins of boring tripled
Lame jump scares stacked into episodes 15 minutes long broken into 5 mins apiece. The golden arm episodes were at least half interesting. The rest is a waste of time. I've had bigger scares looking into the toilet after a dump. Pirate this, don't pay or your a chump.
Artemis Fowl (2020)
Colin Farell must really need coke money....
Opens with dime store cgi of the main characters head sloppily pasted onto some surfer but the aspect ratio is off making the head about 180% bigger than it should be, and that is the high point of this movie. I still lose sleep trying to figure out if the actor that plays Artemis has FAS or just a huge nose... Another movie that makes me want a negative rating option on this site, or at least a 0.
Altered Carbon (2018)
Should have ended on season 1
Season 1 was great 8/10, unfortunately season 2 is a polar opposite. It feels like it was written by someone that never watched season 1 but was given a few notes on how the world worked but was told to diversify the characters involved. Season 2 is a 2/10 I found myself not even caring what was going on by the end of episode 2. Another show ruined by diversity casting and rewrites trying to satisfy the me too Hollywood. Watch season 1 then forget it exists.
Countdown (2019)
Made me wish I had died before watching it....
The only thing this movie made me feel was contrite for being dragged along to watch it. A boring, predictable plot that should have gone straight to free to air tv.
The Walking Dead (2010)
Ran longer than its worth
So the series starts off strong, but runs out of content on season 3. The only reason people still watch this dross is because there is no other survival horror that comes close, which is not a pat on the back as this is clearly a 3/10. Paint dries quicker and tells a story this just dries.
Pandora (2019)
Horrible enough for me to come review it
Terrible writing, wooden acting. and .. the sub par special effects are the highlight of this dismal show. It's not even a 'it's so bad its good' watch, you could probably splice it into an episode of Power Rangers and not even notice. Avoid at all costs.
Into the Dark (2018)
I've had cancer but this is worse
I just watched the first episode and I wish I was back in treatment....yes it worse than having radiation sickness course through your body, the script seems like it was written by someone playing superman on the nintendo 64, the acting is worse than any 3rd grade play I have seen, and the idiocy of each character and their actions just makes me wish for death. (yeh its halloween so lets just carry this obviously dead body around while on the run from a hitman that has us marked for death...etc just retch...) If make a wish foundation contacted me now I would ask that they drop a nuke on wherever this was made. Every other episode must have Jules Vern travel through time and narrate it while onscreen for it to have gotten a rating of 6.3 on imdb.
TLDR: If someone wants you to sit down and watch this with them instantly cut their head of and hide them in the drywall. -100/10