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mosdaft
Reviews
Universe (2021)
Just Like Galaxies There's A Lot Of Space Between Worlds/Words
Far too many "dramatic pauses" whenever there's an animation playing. Also there's an awful lot of stuff anyone with even a passing interest in astronomy/physics already knows.
The Real Prime Suspect (2019)
Relatively Small Amounts Of Info Stretched Into Hour Long Episodes
The best thing that can be pointed out about this series is that they do not follow the American convention of stating each crucial piece of info 3 times... in these shows the main story elements only get repeated once, however there are many parts of the script which are padding, such as constantly referring to the number of victims in a serial killer's career.
Rollerball (2002)
Has All The Elements Of A Good Film But Still Isn't
I suspect that the original script with the social commentary angle intact, which McTiernan rejected, would have been the reason to do a remake of Rollerball, but this is basically a crap retelling of the same story. However, in this version, it's difficult to work out the sporting plays, because the track is too short and a figure 8, so whereas in the original the players had a long track to skate around for each play to take shape, so you could work out what was happening, in this version it's just a mad free-for-all: there's no excitement build up. It's just violence for the sake of violence, the very antithesis of the message of the original and also of what message there is in this version.
Nosferatu - Phantom der Nacht (1979)
Gorgeous But Clunky
The acting in the English version is a bit clunky, but the film is soooo gorgeous that it still gets a 10 from me (the only film to do so on here so far). The production design is beautiful, even though there are several instances where they fail to mask modern elements of the scenery, such as electric light switches, signage, and concrete street furniture. The make up is truly inspiring for those of a goth bent, but what really makes the film is the camera angles: there are too many to mention whereby the scene being shot is rendered somehow 'weird', without knowing that it's the camera angles (so spoiler alert lol), you are just left with a mounting sense of unease the further in you watch... IMO it's the best looking vampire film ever made!
The Unholy (1988)
Very Poor
For starters the actor playing The Priest, the central protagonist ffs, is just not believable as a priest! The dialogue is as wooden as the set, which despite being supposed to be a dressed stone church is clearly plywood... the "stained glass" windows are plastic and so are the 80's babes! I mean, Christ-on-a-bike, even the cross is clearly papier-mâché!
& then we get to the demons... Aah-ha! The latex they are made from was clearly too wet when taken out of the moulds and collapsed in on itself, leaving wonky shaped creatures, 2 of whom are probably real life dwarfs, or maybe just chubby children, with such a thick layer of latex on them that they look like deformed teddy bears in shape and act like it on set!
No, it has no redeeming features: it's not even funny to laugh at. It's just crap. It only gets a 2nd star because the plot, such as it is, did keep me thinking it might get better, until suddenly it was over and it hadn't!!!
The Descent: Part 2 (2009)
For A Bog Standard Loud Sound Jump'n'Yelp It's Not Too Bad
Total formula, but the formula works, and the dynamic range of the sound is such that the sudden loud noises when the monsters turn up are really loud, so you can't help jumping outta your skin, lol! The gore is pathetic though, it looks like vinegar diluted ketchup... shoulda gone with red dyed high fructose corn syrup!
Unthinkable (2010)
Worth Every Penny For Michael Sheen Alone
Michael Sheen's performance is a tour de force. Yes, Samuel L Jackson goes over the top by the end and, yes, Carrie Anne Moss's character is such a patchwork of obvious stereotypes that the poor woman really had nowhere to turn when it came to adding dimensionality to her performance, but as foils to Sheen's acting, they were pretty much exactly what the script demanded. The entire rest of the cast are simply cyphers... they are precisely what is needed to deliver some information and nothing else: on the one hand, you could criticise the decisions which led to this austere result, but on the other, you can see it as masterful editing to keep the time down, so that the pace is dictated purely by the main 3 and what a pace! It starts at a fast trot, soon gets into its stride for a gallop through the middle hour, in classic flight simulator mode we get a breather as Michael Sheen {SPOILER ALERT} seems to crack, and then it's a breathless charge to the end... but... O-oh, there's a creeping dread still to come... OK, it's formulaic, but the formula works and I do genuinely believe it was the actor's strike during pre-production stalling the final release date, combined with the sudden economic downturn when it was finally released, which lead to the film going straight to DVD rather than getting a theatrical release: they were robbed, particularly Micheal Sheen who fully deserved night after night of red carpet treatment for his efforts!