gccuconati Reviews

Titanic (1997)

A masterpiece

[8/10 · 15 April 2024]

For the very first time last night, I watched one of the most universally acclaimed movies of the 1990's, probably of all time, in its entirety with my mom. And that movie is James Cameron's Titanic, a gripping, epic historical drama based on the ill-fated maiden voyage of the RMS Titanic, the magnum opus of the White Star Line, and for her time, the biggest moving object ever built by mankind. Being the most luxurious ocean-liner of the 1910's, she was known as the "ship of dreams" to everyone, and ultimately carried over 1,500 people to their deaths in the freezing waters of the North Atlantic very early in the morning of April 15, 1912.

Of course, to give the story something of a focus, James Cameron chose to center the movie around two Titanic passengers from very different social classes, who fall in love on the ship's voyage: 17-year-old aristocrat Rose DeWitt Bukater (Kate Winslet) and dirt-poor young artist Jack Dawson (Leonardo DiCaprio). And, personally, I think the romantic plotline here really works, and fits in with everything else. It also bears the addition of a villain: Rose's arrogant 30-year-old fiancé, Pittsburgh steel fortune heir Caledon "Cal" Hockley (Billy Zane). And he is quite an excellent villain. And if you've read my review for Balto, I know I'm making myself seem like a hypocrite. But here, the idea of a romance/love triangle storyline actually works perfectly in a story about how a ship sunk and people died. Plus, romance aside, James Cameron was very meticulous about staying true to the real sinking, even portraying key events, like the rescue efforts and the band playing. The only other major deviation he made, was the only thing I have to question: portraying the ship's crew as incompetent at best and outright negligent at worst, except for Captain Smith (Bernard Hill), who is actually portrayed as far more benevolent than he truly was. By contrast, First Officer Murdoch (Ewan Stewart), in particular, goes from a heroic officer who died while trying to single-handedly launch a lifeboat (a task requiring 12 men) to taking bribes, shooting two men trying to rush the lifeboats and shooting himself out of remorse, so I'm not surprised his descendants threatened a lawsuit against Cameron. Even WSL CEO J. Bruce Ismay (Jonathan Hyde), who's pretty much the REAL villain of this movie, is depicted as paying no heed to safety, by encouraging a speed record that the WSL already knew the Titanic COULDN'T BREAK! Speeding up against ice warnings was something that the real Captain Smith CHOSE to do, not something the real Ismay suggested. To the movie's credit, the movie does accurately depict Ismay helping people into the lifeboats and only climbing into one himself when nobody is left to call over. And his bad rep came from that alone, so I don't know whether he really deserves it.

But anyway, the acting in this movie is fantastic. Kate Winslet, in addition to covering her posh English accent up with a posh American accent, is immensely graceful as Rose. Leonardo DiCaprio is clever and charming as Jack. Billy Zane makes an effective villain as Cal. As for all the Titanic crew members, though their personalities are mostly misrepresented (as mentioned before), they're mostly played by actors who almost accurately resemble their real-life counterparts, and they all do a great job with the material. In regards to the framing device, Gloria Stuart (may she rest in peace) is lovely as elderly Rose. Bill Paxton (may he also rest in peace) is affable as treasure hunter Brock Lovett. And though he isn't really an actor, Lewis Abernathy provides good comic relief as Lewis Bodine, Brock's best friend.

The writing is great, too! The movie has an EXCELLENT mixture of excitement, drama, and humor. The sequence of the ship hitting the iceberg and sinking (which occupies at least the halfway point to the 2-hour and 55-minute mark), is exactly as taut and tragic as it needs to be. Some of the more exciting moments include the introductory scene of the ship, and of course, Jack's famous line: "I'M THE KING OF THE WORLD!!!!!!" And of course, in a movie about such a tragic event, there has to be levity, hence why the movie brings in some great humor exactly when necessary. A favorite scene of mine is very early on in the movie, during a forensic analysis of the sinking, Bodine drops this fabulous line: "She's got her whole ass sticking up in the air, and that's a BIG ass!" HA!

Visually, Titanic doesn't disappoint. It's gorgeously filmed, special mention going to the wide shots of the ship out on the sea. In fact, James Cameron actually built a life-size replica of the Titanic for filming, using ORIGINAL BLUEPRINTS!! That's how much he cared about getting it right. The special effects also may be somewhat dated by today's standards, but James Cameron had every right to be proud of the "Propeller Guy" bit.

And last, but certainly not least, the music! Before, I've expressed my love for the work of James Horner, may he rest in peace, but this movie has, without a doubt, the best score he ever wrote! It's so angelic, so beautiful, so poignant, and sounds exactly right for the mood of every scene, ranging from sounding grand and sweeping during the ship boarding to sounding flawlessly dramatic, suspenseful and ominous during the iceberg collision and the sinking. And of course, in the end credits, his romantic theme for Jack and Rose becomes Celine Dion's world-famous and gorgeous power ballad, "My Heart Will Go On", which never fails to give me chills. I'm not kidding when I say that this movie's soundtrack is a must-have!

All things considered, Titanic is a masterpiece of epic proportions. The overly long runtime and misrepresentation of the ship's crew definitely forced me to take off a few points, but overall, it has everything you could ever want from a movie: drama, excitement, humor and plenty of other things. Highly recommended!!!

Matilda (1996)

Gruesome, dark - and hilarious!

[10/10 · 24 March 2024]

I've never really been able to get into Roald Dahl's original novel Matilda, though it is a great book, but ever since I first saw it in preschool, I have always adored this movie! In fact, I actually got to see it in concert with my family last night in New Brunswick, with Danny DeVito personally reciting his narration live while in costume, followed by a personal meet-and-greet with him, Rhea Perlman and, of course, Mara Wilson. And it's still wonderful today.

The acting in this movie is fabulous! Mara Wilson is very graceful, sweet and amiable as Matilda. And I can tell you, from having met her personally last night, she truly is that charming and kind in real life! Danny DeVito, along with giving a great narration, is absolutely fantastic as her dad, Mr. Wormwood, as is Rhea Perlman as her mom, Mrs. Wormwood. Embeth Davidtz is wonderful as Matilda's teacher, Miss Honey, and really brings out her gentle, caring and sweet personality. But the most outstanding performance in the entire movie comes from Pam Ferris as the ruthless, despotic principal, Miss Trunchbull! Everything about her deliciously hammy performance is perfection, and it really makes her exactly what Roald Dahl envisioned her as and THEN some: a fabulous villain who's so vile and nasty that you hate her, and at the same time, so winningly hilarious that you can't help but love her. That's exactly how I view her: I hate her so much, but I love her. It's great, too, because as Mara Wilson herself said, she's actually incredibly nice.

And of course, there's the visuals! Matilda is filmed and edited so beautifully, and it really gives you a sense of the beauty of Matilda's hometown... the only issue being that there's palm trees everywhere, clearly showing that the movie was filmed in California, but judging from Matilda's parents' accents and the blue license plates, it's supposed to be set in New Jersey (then again, the book wasn't even set in America, it was set in England), but that's nitpicking. And that's not even mentioning the special effects! The filmmakers fabulously brought Matilda's telekinetic powers to life with a fantastic mix of CGI and practical effects, and it still looks great after all these years.

The writing is also great! Danny DeVito took Roald Dahl's work and gave it his own sort of spin, and it works fabulously. Along with maintaining a lot of that dark, crazy Dahl edginess, the movie is packed with comedy that will appeal to kids and adults alike. Highlights include Matilda's revenge pranks on her dad for his d**kishness, first by infusing his hair tonic with non-medicinal peroxide, which turns his hair an UGLY golden blonde leading to some truly funny reactions (you'll have to see for yourself), and then when he berates her for rightfully pointing out the sleaziness of his car business ("Daddy, you're a crook! Can't you sell good cars?" "Listen you little wiseacre! I'm smart, you're dumb, I'm big, you're little, I'm right, you're wrong!"), super-gluing his hat onto his head, leading to a hilarious incident in a fancy restaurant when her mom tries to take it off him by force. There's also the bit where Mr. Wormwood tears apart Matilda's library book when he thinks she's reading something raunchy ("It's called Moby-Dick by Herman Melville." "Moby WHAT?!?!?! This is FILTH! TRESH!" HA!), and forces her to watch junky TV, causing her to blow it up with her powers! I actually have that same edition of Moby-Dick myself, and I brought it with me to the concert, and allowed Mr. DeVito to hold it while we posed for our photo with him, Rhea Perlman and Mara Wilson (He even said the "Moby WHAT?" line!), and Mara Wilson recognized it! But of course, the best scenes involve Miss Trunchbull, who gets all the best lines. "WHY are all these women MARRIED?!?!" "I'm gonna TAKE that no-good jalopy you sold me and SHOVE IT UP YOUR BAZOOKA!!!!!!!" HAHAHAHA! And the scene of her forcing Bruce Bogtrotter to eat a MASSIVE chocolate cake, along with being dark (and gross), manages to end on a note that's both triumphant and comedic. And the movie is also touching on occasion, especially any scenes between Matilda and Miss Honey.

And lastly, there's the music! David Newman, also the genius behind the scores for Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, The Cat in the Hat and The Sandlot, delivered a wonderful score for this movie. It's so beautiful and mystical. In fact, last night, he was actually at the concert, conducting the New Jersey Symphony personally, and he posed for the picture with us! And impressively, this movie has only TWO songs: "Send Me On My Way" by Rusted Root and "Little Bitty Pretty One" by Thurston Harris, and they're both great songs, and used so perfectly.

All in all, Matilda is delightfully dark and gruesome, but it's nonetheless a hilarious and tremendously charming movie, one that the whole family will enjoy. As such, it does the book justice while putting its own spin on it, and I can't recommend it enough!!!

Shark Tale (2004)

DreamWorks, why did you...?

[4/10 · 13 March 2024]

For the first time in years tonight, I watched Shark Tale with my older brother. And I can tell you, I don't remember this movie leaving an impression on me when I was little. Well, tonight, it did leave an impression on me: it is DreamWorks' weakest movie.

To summarize, Shark Tale focuses on underachiever Oscar (voiced by Will Smith), a puny fish with only one friend; a lovely female fish named Angie (Renee Zellweger), who works with him at the whale wash (a play on car washes). Oscar aspires to greatness, and one day, he gets his chance; when a great white shark named Frankie (Michael Imperioli) is accidentally killed, Oscar hatches a lie with Frankie's pacifistic little brother Lenny (Jack Black) that he was the one who killed the shark. Overnight, Oscar goes from zero to hero, his aquatic brethren suddenly hailing him "Sharkslayer". But now, he has bigger fish to fry when Frankie and Lenny's father, mob boss Don Lino (Robert de Niro), sends out his hench-sharks to hunt down his son's killer.

The animation may actually be some of the ugliest animation ever to come from DreamWorks. Now, don't get me wrong, the set pieces and environments are amazing. It's the character animation that's the problem! I know that one of DreamWorks' trademarks is that they frequently like to make the characters look like their voice actors, but on this occasion, they went WAY too far. Oscar, in particular, looks like they took Will Smith's face and just PLASTERED it on a realistic fish's body, and didn't try to properly make it anthropomorphic.

Speaking of which, most of the characters aren't that good. Oscar, in particular, is not a very likeable or compelling protagonist. He's loudmouthed, he's downright selfish, and he's a total idiot. I mean, he doesn't treat Angie with much respect, and he commits fraud for fame. I really don't feel bad for him when Lino comes hunting for him. As for temptress Lola (Angelina Jolie), though she's meant to be hated with the way she acts toward Oscar, it feels like he deserves it. As for Ernie (Ziggy Marley) and Bernie (Doug E. Doug), the jellyfish DJs at the whale wash (Really?), though I found them somewhat funny, they're still clearly Jamaican stereotypes, and they're just kind of there.

The writing isn't great either. The plot is really just a mountain of cliches, and the movie seems far more concerned with trying to be hip and cool and taking jabs at pop culture then telling a story. I mean, there's a reference to Jaws or something else at every turn, and the dialogue is sprinkled with outdated lingo, to the point that it actually becomes cringeworthy. Shrek the Third later utilized outdated lingo for a joke at one point (check out my review on that movie for details), and it actually was funny. But this is literally salted in throughout the movie, to the point that it really isn't that funny.

The voice-acting isn't the best. I'm not a big fan of Will Smith in the first place, and as Oscar, he's literally just being himself. It doesn't sound like he's even trying to work for his check. Robert de Niro is pretty superficial as Lino. At least Jack Black seems to be trying his hardest as Lenny, but most of the time, he really just comes off as kind of shrill and grating, and that fake New York accent he dons for the role isn't doing him any favors. It's really amazing to think just four years later, he would do such a better job as Po in Kung Fu Panda (and all its sequels).

And lastly, there's the music. Hans Zimmer scored this movie, but unfortunately, I barely noticed it while watching tonight, because it was overshadowed by tons of hip-hop music and whatnot. And unfortunately, I'm not even much of a hip-hop lover anyway. If you read my reviews, you'll understand I'm more of a pop/rock guy. So, yeah...

All things considered, Shark Tale is quite a funk for DreamWorks Animation. The characters are unappealing, the plot is derivative and WAAAAY too pop culture-heavy (even for DreamWorks' standards!), and the animation is ugly. At its best, it's mediocre, DreamWorks' weakest movie, and really nothing more than a sign that DreamWorks got a little too cocky coming off of Shrek 2, and I'm really happy it never became a franchise. You're better than this, DreamWorks.

Stuart Little 2 (2002)

A sequel that's just as good as its predecessor

[9/10 · 10 March 2024]

Little high, Little low, Little hey, Little ho, everybody! By now, you surely know how much I love the movie Stuart Little. Well, I've also always equally adored its sequel, Stuart Little 2. And last night, for the first time in years, my brother and I watched our DVD of it (which, amazingly, still plays great after all these years, especially since I wiped it down beforehand) with our friend, who comes over for movie nights weekly. And it still holds up as a wonderful sequel after all these years.

The sequel picks up three years after the first movie, with a plot baring more resemblance to that of E. B. White's original novel (again, not that I've read it). Stuart Little (voiced by Michael J. Fox) has settled into his adoptive family life with his parents, Eleanor and Frederick (played by Geena Davis and Hugh Laurie, respectively), his big brother George (Jonathan Lipnicki) and his baby sister Martha (Anna and Ashley Hoelck). However, Stuart doesn't feel happy, because Eleanor has grown overprotective of him (he IS still a mouse, after all!), and George has begun to ignore him in favor of playing with his own friend Will Wilson (Marc John Jefferies). But after Stuart accidentally crashes a toy plane that he and George built together, and George throws it out in anger, Frederick gives Stuart a pep talk about how "every cloud has a silver lining." And sure enough, the next day, Stuart meets a kind-hearted young canary named Margalo (Melanie Griffith), whom he becomes infatuated with. Little does he know, however, that she's actually in cahoots with a sadistic and greedy falcon (James Woods), who took her in as a fledging and forced her to be his slave and steal valuables from houses in exchange for a home.

Of course, characterization matches that of the first movie. Stuart is still the lovable protagonist he was before. The movie does a great job establishing how much he's settled in with the Littles, and they've definitely developed since the first movie. The family cat Snowbell (Nathan Lane), in particular, is no longer hostile to Stuart, and is shown to have bonded with him over the course of three years. As for his stray cat friend Monty (Steve Zahn), now that he's no longer a lackey of Smokey's, he mostly serves as loveable comic relief alongside Snowbell, despite being reduced to only two scenes. And though he still wants to eat Stuart, he also proves to be helpful. Onto the new characters. Margalo is quite loveable and thoroughly developed. Though she's in cahoots with Falcon, stealing things for him, it's made abundantly clear that she doesn't enjoy it at all, and has genuine feelings for Stuart. And Falcon is a great villain. He's just as menacing as Smokey was.

The acting is, once again, terrific. Geena Davis, Hugh Laurie and Jonathan Lipnicki return to their roles as Eleanor, Frederick and George, respectively, and their acting is right on par with the original. The voice-acting for the animals is still top-notch, too! Michael J. Fox, Nathan Lane and Steve Zahn return to their roles as Stuart, Snowbell and Monty, and once again, they nail their roles. Melanie Griffith is wonderful as Margalo, and really helps bring out her character. And James Woods, truly having the knack for playing fast-talking, devilishly charming villains (especially Hades in Hercules), delivers in his area of expertise as Falcon.

And once again, the visuals are astounding! Just like the first movie, the cinematography lends itself to showing every amazing area of New York City. It also clearly shows us that the World Trade Center is nowhere in sight, after appearing in the first movie (telling us that the Littles experienced 9/11 firsthand, tragically). And of course, the special effects are incredible. Once again, the CGI animation on Stuart is fantastic, as well as that on Margalo and Falcon. And once again, Snowbell and Monty's mouths are animated seamlessly when they're talking.

And the writing is incredible, in fact, even better than the first movie. This movie has not only a stronger story that'll even please adults, it's more kid-friendly at the same time! The script is also witty, and the movie has great humor; especially provided by Snowbell, who gets some funny lines. Even Falcon gets some pretty great dialogue! In addition, the movie has more action and thrills in it than the original; these include Stuart finding his plane on a garbage barge, fixing it using trash, getting it flying again, and using it to square off against Falcon.

And of course, there's the music! Alan Silvestri returned to score this movie, and once again, he delivered a great score. He recycles his themes from the first movie, and even provides a new theme for Falcon. In addition, this movie offers an amazing mixtape of pop/rock songs that never fail to delight. Those include Mary Mary's cover of "Put a Little Love in Your Heart" for the opening credits, "Top of the World" by Mandy Moore (no, it's not a cover of the Carpenters song!) for Stuart and Margalo's falling-in-love montage, and one that takes the cake: Chantal Kreviazuk's gorgeous tune "Another Small Adventure", the exciting chorus of which is PERFECTLY synced with the triumphant scene of Stuart taking off in his plane after fixing it. But my personal favorite is "I'm Alive", the beautiful, nostalgia-inducing anthem by Celine Dion in the end credits.

When all's said and done, Stuart Little 2 is just as wonderful, warm-hearted and nostalgic as the original. It's not often you'd find a sequel that's just as good as its predecessor. Every cloud has a silver lining! Highly recommended!!!!!

Stuart Little (1999)

A nostalgic, lovely and warm-hearted movie

[9/10 · 3 March 2024]

I've always adored the Columbia Pictures film Stuart Little, ever since I first got it out of the library on VHS when I was about 3 or 4. In fact, I never would've even heard of it, if not for the trailer I saw for it on the VHS of Thomas and the Magic Railroad. Now, I haven't actually read the original novel by E. B. White, but this movie has stuck with me ever since. However, I hadn't seen it in a while until last night, when I watched it with my brother and a friend for movie night, while my parents were out. And I can tell you, it's still a wonderful movie about not having to look the same to feel like family.

Set in then-contemporary New York City, the film centers around the Little family; Frederick and Eleanor Little (played by Hugh Laurie and Geena Davis, respectively), and their son, George (Jonathan Lipnicki). George really wants a little brother, so Eleanor and Frederick visit the local orphanage to adopt, and ultimately settle on a charming young mouse, named Stuart (voiced by the one and only Michael J. Fox). Needless to say, George doesn't like the idea of a mouse for a brother one bit. Even more unwelcoming to Stuart is the family cat, Snowbell (Nathan Lane), who is deeply upset about the idea of a rodent for a "master", and even further mortified when one of his stray cat friends, Monty (Steve Zahn), finds out. Monty takes Snowbell to meet a rogue alley cat named Smokey (Chazz Palminteri), and they conjure a scheme to get rid of Stuart. Stuart resolves to face these difficulties with as much courage and love as a little mouse like him can muster, and ultimately shows his wonderful new family that even great things can come in little packages.

All the characters in this movie are memorable in so many ways. Stuart is a loveable and compelling protagonist. Eleanor and Frederick are wonderful parents. Even George is adorable, and I enjoy that the movie takes the time to form his bond with Stuart. As for Snowbell, he starts off as a selfish jerk, but gradually grows out of it. Smokey is a good, effective villain. As for Monty, though he's one of Smokey's lackeys, he's impossible not to love. I also love his catchphrase: "Pleeeeease?"

The acting is so perfect in this movie! Geena Davis is lovely as Eleanor. Hugh Laurie, in addition to perfectly glossing over his English accent with a spot-on American accent, is affable as Frederick. As George, Jonathan Lipnicki displays such mastery for the age of 9. Even the voice-acting for the animals is spot-on! Michael J. Fox is just great as Stuart. He's so charming, so authentic, and really gives the part his all. Nathan Lane is really good as Snowbell, and really accentuates his New Yorkish snarkiness. Steve Zahn is insanely hilarious as Monty. Truth be told, this movie was the very first time I ever saw or heard those two talented actors in anything, and I'm really happy about that. And Chazz Palminteri is very fittingly cruel and thuggish as Smokey.

The visuals are terrific! The cinematography is wonderful, and fabulously lends itself to showing us the amazing look of the Big Apple. The set design for the Littles' house is so unique and eye-catching, and yet so believable. And I MUST mention the special effects! The character animation on Stuart is some of the most amazing CGI animation that I've seen in my life. It's incredibly expressive and lifelike, even for a movie released in 1999, and it's aged WONDERFULLY. It probably helps that Stuart has such an adorable, charming design. The CGI used to make the cats' mouths move is likewise convincing, and it actually seems like they're talking. It's that good.

The writing is great, too! The movie has a certain poignancy to it that really enhances the story, without ever making it seem too mushy. The movie's many heartwarming moments include George and later Snowbell warming up to Stuart, and, of course, the ending. The movie also adds in really great humor when necessary, especially provided by Snowbell and moreso Monty.

And then, of course, there's the music. Genius composer Alan Silvestri, as always, delivered a truly wonderful score for this movie! It's so enchanting and majestic and beautiful; exactly what this movie needs. His theme for Snowbell is fittingly sly and jazzy, and instantly brings to mind Who Framed Roger Rabbit. But the score's biggest triumph is his magnificent theme for Stuart himself, and its soaring use at the very end still gives me happy chills today. The song choices are really great, too, along with the songs written specially for the movie. In particular, I really love Trisha Yearwood's "You're Where I Belong" in the end credits.

In summary, Stuart Little is a lovely and warm-hearted movie for the whole family to enjoy, and invokes a twinge of nostalgia for me personally. I can't recommend it enough!!!

Oh, and one more thing: "Are you all NUTS?! He's a mouse!"

The AristoCats (1970)

A nice Disney movie for what it is

[6/10 · 25 February 2024]

Tonight, for the first time in years, I watched The Aristocats; the very first animated movie that Disney put out after the man himself, Walt Disney, passed away. It's a favorite of a friend of mine's, and he came over for movie night tonight. And while it sadly isn't particularly memorable, it does have nice things going for it.

Set in Paris in 1910, the movie focuses on a beautiful, prim and prissy white cat named Duchess (voiced by Eva Gabor) and her kittens, Toulouse (Gary Dubin), Marie (Liz English) and Berlioz (Dean Clark). Wealthy retired opera singer Madame Adelaide Bonfamille (Hermione Baddeley), the owner of Duchess and her kittens, decides to leave her inheritance to her cats. Her butler, Edgar Balthazar (Roddy Maude-Roxby), wants to inherit the fortune himself, so he drugs the cats with sleeping pills and then ditches them in the countryside. Lost in an unfamiliar setting, Duchess and her kittens meet alley cat Thomas O'Malley (Phil Harris, in his second Disney gig since The Jungle Book), who's more than happy to help them return home to Paris. Along the way, they meet several quirky, funny characters, such as two English twin geese, Abigail and Amelia Gabble (Monica Evans and Carole Shelley, respectively) and a jazz band of alley cats led by a friend of Thomas's, Scat Cat (Scatman Crothers, doing a really good Louis Armstrong impression).

The animation is quite good. The backgrounds are very wonderfully painted and capture the essence and beauty of Paris, and the French countryside. The character animation is fine, but not Disney's best. While the characters are all excellently designed, and their movements are incredibly fluid, there are occasional-yet-evident inconsistencies (for instance, Duchess's nose changes size in one early scene), and several moments where the feline animation appears to have taken a step back from The Jungle Book (frequently, the cats stand on their hind legs, and use their front paws as hands). Furthermore, the scratchy xerography look isn't nearly as good here as in most other Disney movies from the period. The rough pencil lines are more prevalent than ever, and really tend to clash with the backgrounds.

And as for the characters, while they're mostly likeable, I can't help but notice how derivative or stereotypical some of them are. Duchess, in particular, is obsessed with being ladylike. That being said, she's a wonderful mother, and has a bit of depth to her. Seeing that she doesn't fall for Thomas's pickups for a second, shows that she's been around the block quite a lot for such a pampered pet. But as for Thomas, he definitely feels a lot like Tramp from Lady and the Tramp (though, admittedly, I haven't seen Lady and the Tramp myself), except without the "wrong side of the tracks" vibe Tramp had. Nonetheless, his romance with Duchess is believable, his interactions with the kittens are adorable, and I like how he quickly decides to be a dad. Speaking of the kittens, I think they're quite adorable. All three of them. That much being said, I wish they gave Marie more to do than fall off things and constantly need to be rescued, as well as obsess over romance. Because of that, she comes off as a bit of a sexist stereotype. Although, I do love her adorable English accent. As for Berlioz, I wish he had more to do as well. Compared to Marie and Toulouse, he's more introverted. And out of the kooky characters the cats encounter on their journey, the geese's drunken Uncle Waldo (Bill Thompson) is actually the best character in the movie. He's just so entertaining. Madame is a very polite woman, and I like that she really loves her cats. But I find it weird that she would even leave her riches to her pets. But unfortunately, Edgar is probably the weakest and most unmemorable of Disney's villains. His motivation is WAY too sympathetic. Sympathetic motivations can be a great thing for villains, but Edgar's "villainy" is further subverted by his bumbling, inept personality. I mean, his stupidity was the whole reason for the conflict, because he can't even do math properly. It doesn't help that he's trying his best not to kill the cats.

The writing isn't the best. When the movie is focusing on Thomas's relationships with Duchess and her kittens, it's at its best. But I don't appreciate that the movie doesn't elaborate on why Duchess and her kittens are so desperate to get home to Madame. Furthermore, there's a pretty brutal plot hole in Edgar's plan: he drugs the cats by dumping an ENTIRE BOTTLE of sleeping pills in their cream! Though it's made clear he's not trying to kill the cats, a sleeping pill overdose actually CAN be lethal, and I have no idea why such was not the case here. Furthermore is Edgar's feud with two vicious dogs, Napoleon (Pat Buttram) and Lafayette (George Lindsey). I'm gonna be real, I did find that funny, but I can't ignore how insanely pointless it was. It was clearly just put in for filler.

The voice-acting is really good. Eva Gabor (may she rest in peace) gives Duchess a really good motherly voice, though her accent is very inconsistent. As Thomas, Phil Harris (may he also rest in peace) puts a slightly more mature, suave spin on the warm, goofy voice he gave to Baloo in The Jungle Book. As Toulouse, Marie and Berlioz, respectively, Gary Dubin (gone WAY too soon), Liz English and Dean Clark do great jobs in making their kittens sound like realistic little kids. Roddy Maude-Roxby does a commendable job as Edgar, even if he isn't given much of anything to work with.

And then there's the music. George Bruns, who scored The Jungle Book, returned to score this movie, and once again, he did a very great job. Some cues actually remind me of the jazziness of The Jungle Book, but there is some musette added for a real French feel. And the songs are good, too, though not particularly memorable. In particular, the opening song was actually sung by Maurice Chevalier, who came out of retirement for this alone. It and "Scales and Arpeggios" are good for the Sherman Brothers (who also wrote the songs for The Jungle Book and The Many Adventures of Winnie-the-Pooh), but nothing truly memorable. Thomas's introduction song "Thomas O'Malley", written by Terry Gilkyson, is nice, but it's nowhere near as good as "The Bare Necessities" from The Jungle Book, sadly, even if it's written and sung by the same people. But the song "Everybody Wants to be a Cat", written by Floyd Huddleston and Al Rinker is clearly the best song in the movie... aside from the solo by Chinese cat Shun Gon (Paul Winchell, doing an "Engrish"-accented version of his Tigger voice), which comes off as laughably, unnecessarily racist.

All in all, The Aristocats is quite a nice, charming movie. Unfortunately, it's quite unoriginal, riffing off of older Disney movies, and certainly isn't as memorable as, say, The Jungle Book. In this movie, Walt's absence really shows. Nonetheless, I recommend it to every and any Disney fan.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (2005)

Finger-licking, edgy, hilarious - a truly fantastic movie!

[9/10 · 18 February 2024]

These days, one of my favorite movies to watch is Tim Burton's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, the 2005 film adaptation of Roald Dahl's book of the same name. However, even though this movie was a hit with critics and was a box office smash, it instantly gained detractors, who even to this day, call it a soulless remake of the 1971 adaptation, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. That's a crock of s**t! It's just another adaptation of the book! And even though I enjoy the 1971 film as a whole, this movie is my preference, unlike most other people.

Of course, you know the story. It centers on Charlie Bucket (played by Freddie Highmore), a kind little boy who lives with a dirt-poor family. Because his family's only source of income is his father's penny-paying job in a local toothpaste factory, Charlie's family is stuck eating nothing but cabbage soup everyday. Adding insult to injury, Mr. Bucket eventually loses his job, worsening the Buckets' financial situation. However, Charlie's luck soon changes when he and his favorite grandparent, Grandpa Joe (David Kelly) win a special tour of the mysterious, magical local chocolate factory of eccentric chocolatier Willy Wonka (Johnny Depp), alongside four horrible kids: piggish oaf Augustus Gloop (Philip Wiegratz), spoiled snob Veruca Salt (Julia Winter in her only film role), gum-chewer Violet Beauregarde (AnnaSophia Robb) and media-addict Mike Teavee (Jordan Fry). Assisted by his remarkably small workers, the Oompa Loompas (played collectively by Deep Roy), Mr. Wonka has a hidden motivation for the tour, which he'll reveal only when every child has shown their true colors.

This movie does a TREMENDOUS job of staying true to Roald Dahl's work! It probably helps that it was a passion project for his wife Felicity, and daughter Lucy, who sought to right the wrongs of the 1971 film. Tim Burton and screenwriter John August took super good care in bringing the story from the pages to the screen. In fact, Burton was especially adamant about not killing off Charlie's father like in the 1971 film, because he was a key part of the story, and helped retain that Roald Dahl craziness. But they also expanded on the material a little. I know most people don't care for Mr. Wonka's added backstory involving his dentist father (Christopher Lee), but I personally find that charming, for two reasons. One, it really adds a whole new layer to Mr. Wonka, making him more humanized, and two, Christopher Lee (may he rest in peace) made a truly top-notch stern, cold, nightmarish dentist. Only he could make the silly-sounding word "LOLLIPOPS" sound menacing. That being said, I wish they could've resolved it without having to take a plot detour in the final act of the movie. Either way, I find it FAR better than the hole-riddled Slugworth subplot from the 1971 movie. It's better-written and more interesting.

And all of the characters are faithful to the book. Yes, Charlie is a blander character, but that's kind of the point. He's simply an ordinary little boy, not the fastest, strongest or smartest, but he gets something more special than anything remotely imaginable. He's an audience insert. We're just supposed to imagine ourselves in his shoes, not identify with him. And Freddie Highmore's modest, nuanced performance tells us all we need to know about him. Grandpa Joe, in particular, is exactly as he was in the book: a peppy old man who despite his lifestyle, remains optimistic. The four bratty kids are also true to the book, and more. Augustus is a gluttonous beast, who eats every second of the day. Despite his repulsive habits, thanks to his enabling parents, he shows a superiority complex, especially when he taunts Charlie for not having candy with him. Veruca is also far more interesting (and far easier on my ears) than in the 1971 film; instead of yelling and screeching at her father to get her what she wants when she wants it, her weapon of choice is emotional manipulation; arousing his sympathy by playing the part of Daddy's Little Princess. Violet isn't just a rude gum-chewer; she's pushy, cruel and feels she has to be better than everyone else at everything. Her awful, hypercompetitive mother has her brainwashed into believing you're either a winner or a loser. And as for Mike, he's a nasty, rude kid who feels that he's smarter than even Mr. Wonka, and is obsessed with all things media. He's essentially the anti-Charlie. But Mr. Wonka is the truest to the book. As interpreted by Johnny Depp, Mr. Wonka is exactly how Roald Dahl envisioned him: a three-quarters-short-of-a-buck, yet goofy genius devoid of social skills, who loves getting reactions out of people, especially when they're offended, yet he still loves to grin and flaunt his creations. When I see him, I see the Mr. Wonka from the book, so stop it with this Michael Jackson nonsense! Also, his line in the nut room, "Don't touch that squirrel's nuts!" NEVER fails to crack me up!

And then there's the visuals. ASTOUNDING! This movie has a look all its own, perfectly fitting Roald Dahl's style! It's sort of like Dr. Suess's books, but a slightly dark, warped-yet-inviting vibe. Charlie's town is unlike any real town in the world. The outside of the factory practically dominates the town. And inside the factory, the rooms don't look like sets in the slightest! The chocolate room, in particular, looks so lush and inviting and like another planet, and everything looks eatable! The inventing room, being top-secret, is loaded with crazy gizmos. Plus, the strong, vivid color scheme in every single room provides a great contrast with the muted grays and whites of the outside world. Something that really adds to it is Tim Burton's remarkable dynamic camera moves and editing! Another thing that adds to it is the special effects. This movie relies almost entirely on high-quality practical effects, only using CGI for stuff that would otherwise be impossible; most notably the scene of Violet turning into a blueberry. Even then, I can't tell that it's CGI!

And finally, the music. Danny Elfman's score for this movie is fantastic! It's chilling, beautiful, mysterious and majestic, with a delightfully sinister vibe, and sounds suspenseful when it needs to. And that's not even mentioning the awesome, unique songs that he wrote and sang. "Wonka's Welcome Song", the only song written for the movie, is sprightly and fun. But the creme de la creme is the Oompa-Loompa songs. Unlike the generic, repetitive (but admittedly catchy) ones from the 1971 film, the Oompa-Loompa songs in this film are all different! They actually use Dahl's lyrics, and they're all different styles and melodies, each perfectly fitting the bratty kids' personalities. Plus, they're all super catchy! Augustus's is a big, heavy Bollywood number, fitting his overweight appearance and superiority complex. Violet's is a warped disco piece, complete with a victory dance, reflecting her competitive nature. My personal favorite is Veruca's, a delightful, heavenly Beatles-inspired tune with negative passive-aggressive jabs, reflecting how pampered and spoiled she is. Mike's is a dark, grungy rock song, reflecting his nasty, immoral, angsty nature. For God's sake, get the soundtrack!

All in all, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is a fabulous movie on its own, and as an adaptation of the book. In fact, in my opinion, it's one of Tim Burton's best movies, alongside Beetlejuice! And my brother, my dad and I believe it to be the better movie than Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory.

Roald Dahl would be so pleased.

Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (1971)

A decent movie, but overrated...

[6/10 · 10 February 2024]

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory was the very first adaptation of Roald Dahl's beloved children's novel, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. As such, everybody who grew up with it (all the teachers throughout my school years, some friends of my parents') praises it as a classic. Well, I'm only 20, and having watched it several times over the years, read the book and watched the 2005 movie (I actually saw that first, and that's actually my favorite. That's a review for another day.), I can tell you that while I enjoy this movie as a whole, I'm afraid it's too flawed of an adaptation and of a movie on its own for me to say it's one of my favorite movies.

The story focuses on Charlie Bucket (played by Peter Ostrum in his only film role), a kind, young boy from a dirt-poor family who eats cabbage soup three meals a day. All four of his grandparents are still alive, but bedridden, including his favorite, Grandpa Joe (Jack Albertson). Charlie has learned to accept his lifestyle with dignity, but dreams of something special: unwrapping a chocolate bar and finding one of five hidden golden tickets that will admit him into the local, mysterious chocolate factory run by the eccentric, reclusive Willy Wonka (Gene Wilder). Ticket after ticket is found by four nasty children: big eater Augustus Gloop (Michael Bolner), spoiled b**ch Veruca Salt (Julie Dawn Cole), gum-chewer Violet Beauregarde (Denise Nickerson), and TV lover Mike Teavee (Paris Themmen). But Charlie is certain that no matter how much he wants a ticket, he has zero chance. However, right when Charlie least expects it, a miracle occurs in the form of money that he finds in the street and with it, buys a Wonka bar, and he finds the last ticket! Throughout the journey, each child's defining sin gets the better of them, and they disappear one-by-one.

In terms of faithfulness to the book... frankly, Roald Dahl was right to be so angry! He wrote the script himself, and then they took a hatchet to it! This movie is barely faithful to his work. Writing-wise, it disregards Roald Dahl's style, instead going through the motions, copying whatever was popular at the time, notably gags lifted from Jerry Lewis movies that just pad out the story; that said, I love the psychiatrist and super computer gags. "Shut up, Hofsteder, tell me where de ticket is!" "What would a computer do with a lifetime supply of chocolate?" HAHAHAHA! Character-wise, there is one thing I've gotta give this movie credit for, and that's making Charlie into a compelling protagonist with real motivations. Unfortunately, he's one character. What about all the other characters? They're all completely backwards to the book. Grandpa Joe, in particular, who's supposed to be a kid at heart who always looks on the bright side of things in times of hardship, is reduced to a stereotypical grouchy old man, an inconsistent jerk and even stupid and irresponsible. In fact, in the fizzy lifting drink room, he openly suggests he and Charlie ignore Mr. Wonka's order not to sample the drinks behind Mr. Wonka's back, which ends with them nearly getting cut up by a fan, and then he has the nerve to get upset when Mr. Wonka explodes at them over it at the climax (by the way, Mr. Wonka's rant, in question is literally the only scene I don't like in this movie. I said what I had to.). As for the four bratty kids, they're almost all completely stripped of any real personality. Augustus doesn't get enough screentime or lines (though to be fair, it was because Michael Bolner wasn't fluent in English at the time) to develop properly, so all we know about him is he likes to eat. Even then, he's in good shape, and is shown to have really good table manners! That's not the Augustus from the book! Violet is simply rude and chews gum... and talks in the same nasally, whiny pitch. But Mike is the most backwards from the book: instead of being a TV-obsessed brat with a short fuse and the most immoral of the four bad kids, he's a super-sweet kid who just loves TV a little too much. Because of that, Augustus, Violet and Mike's fates almost make me feel sorry for them, and even worse, the movie never shows us whether they and Veruca survive or not. The only one whose brattiness is properly showcased is Veruca, partially thanks to Julie Dawn Cole's vehement performance. Even then, they go too far. Literally the first time we see her, she's screeching at her dad, demanding her golden ticket. I actually cover my ears during that part. In regards to Mr. Wonka himself... hoo boy, I'm gonna get the "Unhelpful" button hit for this... he's the most misportrayed in this movie. Nothing against Gene Wilder (may he rest in peace), it's just the way he's written. And it's all wrong. Surely, Paris Themmen could've pulled off the angry brat Mike is supposed to be, but Gene Wilder never could've pulled off who Mr. Wonka truly is. He's essentially playing a toned-down version of what later became his character in Young Frankenstein: a charming, sarcastic, semi-insane, quirky gentleman, who loves subtle craziness and confusing people. Though, I do love his famous flip during his grand entrance! I'll touch more on this in my review for the 2005 movie.

But enough about faithfulness to the book. Let's talk subplots! *possible spoiler* It's explained by Grandpa Joe that the reason Mr. Wonka locked his factory and replaced all his workers with Oompa-Loompas was because his rival chocolatiers were recruiting spies to steal the secret formulas to his creations, ESPECIALLY his biggest rival, Mr. Arthur Slugworth (Gunter Meisner). Every time a ticket is found, Slugworth seems to teleport in out of nowhere to tell each of the kids about Mr. Wonka's invention, the Everlasting Gobstopper, and how he wants them to bring him one so he can obtain the secret formula. So, he's set up to be menacing. However, after the tour of the factory actually begins, he disappears from the movie, aside from the odd mention. And then, after Mr. Wonka's rant (which I already mentioned is the only scene I dread), Grandpa Joe suggests Charlie give his gobstopper to Slugworth as revenge, but instead Charlie selflessly gives it back to Mr. Wonka, magically fixing everything, then a nonsensical twist comes: the whole thing is a test, and Slugworth isn't Slugworth; he's a worker of Mr. Wonka's sent to verify the morality of the ticket winners. And any kid who gives their gobstopper to "Slugworth" loses the prize. Isn't the whole point of the tour for Mr. Wonka to observe the kids' morality firsthand? Also, Slugworth's is an established brand of chocolate in the movie. And Mr. Wonka is supposed to be a recluse, his workers having been replaced by Oompa-Loompas! Is "Slugworth" an Oompa-Loompa? Wouldn't people watching on TV instantly figure out this dude is an imposter? It's just riddled with holes.*end spoiler*

Visuals, visuals, visuals. Solidly done, but nothing special, unfortunately. The outside world feels pretty ordinary, even the outside of the factory looks mundane at best. Even the inside of the factory doesn't feel like some otherworldly place. Well, except for the chocolate room. That still looks impressive even today! But all the other rooms are clearly sets. The special effects are also not that good, especially in the scene of Violet turning into a blueberry. To be fair, not only was the technology not there, this movie was made on a shoestring budget.

And finally the music! The score by Anthony Newley and Leslie Bricusse is sprightly and energetic. And the songs are great, too! Classics for a reason, in fact. "Cheer Up Charlie" is very sweet and lovely. "I've Got a Golden Ticket" is lively, bouncy and fun. But "Pure Imagination" is iconic, and easily my favorite in the movie. And could Gene Wilder sing! The only problem on the soundtrack is the Oompa-Loompa songs. Every time, it's the same song over and over, slightly different tempo, and different second verse. The lyrics are also bland, and it gets annoying after a while. Rhyming words with "Oompa-Loompa (gibberish)" does not a good song make. Blemishes like that tend to drag down soundtracks.

All in all, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory is mostly a solid movie. Unfortunately, it is dragged down by its lack of faithfulness to Roald Dahl's work, let alone his style, and the two parts I said I didn't like. Even though I enjoy the most of it anyways, I'm tired of people saying this movie is perfect. Personally, I'd stick with the book, or watch the 2005 movie.

The Fox and the Hound (1981)

Not the best Disney movie, but adorable

[8/10 · 24 January 2024]

Last night, my older brother and I watched The Fox and the Hound for the first time in a while. And while it's not the best Disney movie, it's an adorable tale about an unlikely friendship.

The story is simple. A baby fox whose mother was just killed, is taken in by a kind old lady, named Widow Tweed (voiced by Jeanette Nolan), who names him Tod (Keith Coogan). Meanwhile, Tweed's neighbor, a hot-tempered hunter named Amos Slade (Jack Albertson), has just gotten a hound puppy, named Copper (Corey Feldman), and introduces him to his hunting dog, Chief (Pat Buttram). Tod quickly befriends Copper, and they promise each other that they'll remain best friends forever. But they grow apart after Amos takes both his dogs on a season-long hunting trip. By the following spring, Tod (now Mickey Rooney) and Copper (now Kurt Russell) have grown up, and Copper is now a hunting dog. Their friendship becomes further strained when Chief nearly dies after being hit by a train while chasing Tod, prompting an angered Copper to vow revenge on his childhood best friend. Realizing Tod isn't safe with her anymore, Tweed is forced to leave him in the forest. Now, Tod and Copper must put aside their inherent differences in order to mend their broken bond.

The animation is beautiful. This movie was animated mostly by the then-up-and-coming current-gen Disney animators, under the supervision of the last two of Disney's Nine Old Men, Frank Thomas and Ollie Johnston. On this movie, they truly worked together to make a cohesive whole. The backgrounds are rich with a natural, earthy color scheme, though not quite as good-looking as several other Disney movies, but the climactic fight scene with the grizzly bear looks amazing.

The characters are fleshed out and endlessly engaging, especially Tod and Copper. Their friendship is handled well, and though they remain separated at the end, they're back on good terms. Tweed is mostly very kind and grandmotherly, but she gets very angry if any kind of harm tries to come to Tod. I like that in her! As for Amos, he's generally a nasty guy, but he does genuinely care for his dogs. Big Mama (Pearl Bailey), the owl who serves as Tod's mentor, is wise, motherly and caring. But as for Vixey (Sandy Duncan), the female fox Tod falls for, she's sadly little more than a designated love interest, though she seems nice enough.

The writing is, for the most part, really good! The movie has a really good sense of drama, tragedy and bittersweetness, while salting in some of that necessary Disney humor, in particular, the subplot of the birds Dinky (Richard Bakalyan) and Boomer (Paul Winchell, the original voice of Tigger, flaunting his Tigger voice) chasing after Squeeks the Caterpillar. Although, that tends to slow the movie down at times. My personal favorite part was Tweed's confrontation with Amos: "Amos Slade, you trigger-happy lunatic, GIVE ME THAT GUN!!!" HA! My only real complaint is the fact that Copper becomes bent on killing Tod after Chief simply gets a broken leg after being hit by the train. If Chief had actually DIED, like in the novel and the early script drafts, Copper's anger would been completely understandable. But as it stands, his anger comes off as incredibly petty, because this was an accident that had no permanent consequences.

The voice-acting is great! As young Tod and young Copper respectively, Keith Coogan and Corey Feldman demonstrate remarkable talent, even for 10 and 11. Voicing the characters as adults, Mickey Rooney (may he rest in peace) and Kurt Russell bring energy and charm to them. Jeanette Nolan (may she rest in peace) brings a lovely, grandmotherly nature to Tweed. As Amos, Jack Albertson seems to be channeling his hot-headedness from his turn as Grandpa Joe in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, and it suits his character well. Everybody else also fits their roles perfectly, except for Pat Buttram. His voice sounds way too goofy, and all wrong for Chief. Given his design and short-tempered personality, Chief should've had a gruffer voice.

And lastly, the music. Buddy Baker (who also scored The Many Adventures of Winnie-the-Pooh) scored this movie fabulously. And the songs are good; they're not big showstoppers like in The Jungle Book and Aladdin and most other Disney movies, but they're fine songs that suit the tone of the movie well. Especially "Goodbye May Seem Forever", which is particularly touching.

All in all, The Fox and the Hound is a bittersweet, simple, beautiful, innocent, warmhearted movie that really tackles the themes of unlikely friendship in classic Disney fashion. I suggest it to every and any Disney fan!

The Blues Brothers (1980)

A mission from God.

[10/10 · 13 January 2024]

Tonight, for the first time in 6 years, I watched The Blues Brothers with my older brother and a friend of mine, after only watching bits and pieces of it for a long while. And it's still the masterpiece I know it as!

The film centers on "Joliet" Jake Blues (John Belushi) and his brother Elwood (Dan Akroyd), collectively known as the Blues Brothers; characters who originated from a recurring skit of the same name on SNL during its golden era. Upon doing 3 years for armed robbery and being paroled for good behavior, Jake reunites with Elwood, and together, they visit Sister Mary "The Penguin" Stigmata (Kathleen Freeman) at their childhood home, the St. Helen of the Blessed Shroud Orphanage. And she has bad news: the orphanage will close unless $5,000 in back taxes are paid within 11 days. Certain that they can raise the money in time, Jake and Elwood put their band (which fell apart after Jake got put in jail) back together. However, after playing a couple gigs and making a couple enemies, including the police, the brothers brave several brutal odds to deliver the money in time.

The acting is fabulous in this movie. John Belushi (gone WAAAY too soon) and Dan Ackroyd give noteworthy performances as Jake and Elwood. They're so deadpan, and don't fail to make me laugh. And their chemistry is unbelievable! Kathleen Freeman, may she rest in peace, is so comically serious as Sister Mary. Famous jazz singer Cab Calloway, may he also rest in peace, is really great as Jake and Elwood's father figure, Curtis. As for the band, they're literally just playing themselves. Everybody is well-cast.

The writing is great, too! This movie's comedy is totally on-point at every turn. You've got the police chase scene through the Dixie Square Mall (RIP). The scene of Sister Mary angrily chasing Jake and Elwood out of her office for cursing in front of her is just priceless! There's also the scene of Jake and Elwood coercing Mr. Fabulous into rejoining the band by barging into the fancy restaurant where he works as a maître d' and acting like pigs. Priceless! There's also the scene where, when Jake and Elwood try to get Matt "Guitar" Murphy to rejoin, his wife, played by Aretha Franklin (she was gone VERY suddenly), warns him to think about the consequences of his actions, before bursting into a rendition of "Think" for emphasis. The movie also contains an arsenal of cameos, from the amazing James Brown as the Right Reverend Cleophus James, to the fabulous Ray Charles as himself.

And the creme de la creme: the music! This movie substitutes a score for fabulous original renditions of really great songs. For instance, Aretha Franklin's aforementioned performance of "Think". There's also the band's great renditions of "Rawhide" and "Stand By Your Man" at Bob's Country Bunker. But the real highlight of the movie's soundtrack is "Everybody Needs Somebody to Love".

All in all, The Blues Brothers truly is a mission from God. I'd say it's the best movie ever to be spun off from SNL. Highly recommended!!!!!

Catch Me If You Can (2002)

It's fantastic... do you concur?

[8/10 · 11 January 2024]

Catch Me If You Can is an elegant, breezy movie with a fun tone that I've seen many times. In fact, I just got done watching it tonight! And it's as great as people say it is.

Based on the semi-autobiographical book of the same name by the infamous conman Frank William Abagnale Jr., Catch Me If You Can is a retelling of how Frank (played by Leonardo DiCaprio) successfully pulled off a series of scams worth about $4 million by posing as Pan Am copilot, a Georgia doctor, and a Louisiana parish prosecutor, and depositing forged checks all around the world... all before his 19th birthday. FBI Agent Carl Hanratty (Tom Hanks) makes it his top mission to capture Frank and bring him to justice, but Frank is always one step ahead of him. While I haven't actually read the book, and can't show a bias, in fact, the truth of Frank's story has been disputed. However, the real Frank has approved of the movie as 80% accurate, something I'm pleased to know. Truth be told, my mom actually met the real Frank around this time last year.

The acting is fabulous. Leonardo DiCaprio is especially good as Frank. He does a really good job of accurately portraying his craftiness, wit and slick charm. Tom Hanks is about as comically serious as he can get as Carl. Christopher Walken gives a very poignant, against-type performance as Frank's dad, Frank Sr.

The writing is tremendous. The movie has really good worldbuilding, a fun, bouncy tone, and good comedic timing. I especially loved the scene of Frank posing as a substitute teacher just to humiliate a bullying classmate of his at his new school, and the scene of him pulling his first duty as a lawyer by riffing off a courtroom scene from the Perry Mason episode The Case of the Jealous Journalist. It's where the movie starts to take a darker turn two thirds of the way through that I begin to lose interest. If there's any real flaw that this movie has, it's the pacing. A couple times, the movie seems like it's going to end, but it can't because Frank keeps running away, until you're kind of just waiting for Carl to catch him.

The opening credits are really neat. By displaying little animated characters playing out the movie, what with a cop chasing a figure who changes outfits constantly, they set the stage for the entire movie without giving away or replacing anything important.

And of course, the music. As always, the score is by John Williams, who always delivers a masterful score when he's working with Steven Spielberg. This movie's no exception! In fact, his score for this movie is unusual. For this movie, he deviated from his signature bombastic, thrilling orchestral approach, in favor of supplying this movie with a fittingly sly, jazzy Henry Mancini-esque score.

All in all, Catch Me If You Can is one of the finer movies Steven Spielberg has directed. I recommend it to anyone who likes comedy-crime movies!

Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988)

AMAZING!

[10/10 · 5 January 2024]

For the very first time, I watched the most widely lauded live-action/animated movie in existence, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, with my mom tonight. And it truly is everything it's cracked up to be!

Set in Los Angeles in 1947, in a world where cartoons meet reality, this movie centers on two very opposite characters with a believable dynamic: surly, down-on-his-luck detective Eddie Valiant (played by Bob Hoskins) and famous cartoon star Roger Rabbit (voiced by Charles Fleischer). Eddie is hired by Roger's boss, cartoon producer R. K. Maroon (Alan Tilvern) to investigate an adultery scandal involving Roger's sultry toon human wife Jessica Rabbit (speaking voice by an uncredited Kathleen Turner, singing voice by Amy Irving). However, when Marvin Acme (Stubby Kaye), the owner of Toontown and Jessica's alleged paramour, is found murdered, the evil Judge Doom (Christopher Lloyd) vows to catch and destroy Roger.

The acting is flawless in this movie! But Bob Hoskins, may he rest in peace, really stands out as Eddie. Truth be told, this is actually only the fourth movie I've seen him in, after Balto, Hook and Garfield: A Tale of Two Kitties, and this may actually have been the best performance he ever gave. Not only does he pull off such a convincing American detective, but I really liked how he developed from a surly, humorless alcoholic to a lovable, goofy guy thanks to Roger, and his interactions and chemistry with Roger are so believable and realistic. It's amazing, too, because during filming, Bob Hoskins was just acting with empty space, while Charles Fleischer stood off-camera in a Roger Rabbit costume, reciting his lines. Speaking of which, Charles Fleischer gives a truly hilarious voice to Roger. Kathleen Turner is fittingly seductive as Jessica. Come on, give her credit! And Christopher Lloyd makes a PERFECT villain as Judge Doom. So scary, yet so entertaining!

Okay, let's talk about the animation! Animation legend Richard Williams directed the animation for this movie, and his crew were given the task of animating to the live-action footage, frame-by-frame. Since director Robert Zemeckis kept the camera moving all the time, it was very difficult for the crew to keep the models consistent. But they pulled it off!!!! The animated characters and objects interact so well with the live-action ones. Truly the best blend of hand-drawn animation and live-action I've seen in my life. What's equally amazing is that ILM optically composited the two and animated separate light sources... WITHOUT USING ONE COMPUTER! Now THAT is achievement!

The writing is great, too! Along with an original and touching story, the humor in this movie manages to appeal to kids on one level, and adults on another. The pacing may not be the best, but for what is this? Also, this movie does something truly amazing that no movie or show has done before or since: Mickey Mouse and Bugs Bunny share the screen and interact with each other! If that's not amazing, I don't know what is!

Music, music, music. Genius composer Alan Silvestri, as always, delivered a truly amazing score for this movie. It ranges everywhere from epic, to jazzy, to tender, to humorous; especially his use of the Looney Tunes theme, "The Merry-Go-Round Broke Down"! And of course, let's not forget the song "Smile, Darn Ya, Smile!" from the 1931 short of the same name.

When all's said and done, Who Framed Roger Rabbit is an innovation in and of itself. It's an amazing live-action/animated movie with all the loveable cartoon characters you can think of, and an exciting story to go along with it! If you still haven't seen this movie, I highly suggest watching it!!!

The Prince of Egypt (1998)

Expected nothing... got everything!

[10/10 · 3 January 2024]

Happy New Year, everybody! I've heard multiple really great things about DreamWorks' second animated movie The Prince of Egypt, with people calling it DreamWorks' magnum opus. I was almost expecting another Balto situation (surely, if you read my reviews, you know how I feel about that movie), but upon watching it for the very first time yesterday (it's for free on YouTube), I was amazed. What I got instead was a truly amazing and pretty much flawless movie!

The movie is an animated retelling of the Book of Exodus, and centers around Egyptian Prince Moses (voiced by Val Kilmer). As a teenager, Moses encounters his biological siblings, Aaron (Jeff Goldblum) and Miriam (Sandra Bullock), and upon learning from them of his origins as a Jewish slave, he embarks on a quest to free his people from captivity. However, Moses' plea is denied by his adoptive older brother, Rameses (Ralph Fiennes), the current pharaoh, leading a series of terrible plagues to strike Egypt. And though this movie does take liberties with the story it's retelling, I'm totally fine that, because one, the filmmakers are at least honest about it in the opening message. And two, the movie remains faithful to its source material to the best of its ability, instead of completely warping it out of shape the way Balto did.

The animation is unlike any non-Disney traditionally animated movie before this movie! Every character is designed to accurately resemble the real Hebrews, Nubians and Egyptians, all their movements are fluid, and there's plenty of shading in every one of them. But what I really want to talk about regarding the movie's visuals is the effects animation and backgrounds. Every effects shot in this movie, from the parting of the Red Sea to God as the burning bush, is rich with CGI that blends fabulously with everything else. The backgrounds are also fabulous, from the towering pyramids to the glittering Egyptian palaces. It truly is a feast for the eyes.

All the characters are also amazing! Moses is an extremely likeable and heroic protagonist. He starts out haughty, but begins to display modesty when he finds out his true heritage. Rameses, despite being the villain, is impossible not to love. His motivations are sympathetic (though not too much), and he's clearly upset about having to go against Moses, and fails to see that his own stubbornness is the true cause of his suffering. In that regard, he's just as much of a complex villain as Judge Claude Frollo from Disney's The Hunchback of Notre Dame! Tzipporah (Michelle Pfeiffer), the Midian woman who later becomes Moses's wife, is very kind, spirited, sassy, and supportive of Moses on his mission. Miriam is very sweet and serves as the voice of optimism among the Hebrews. Aaron is meek and cowardly, but makes up for it when he's the first to go in the Red Sea when it parts. And while he's justifiably harsh to Moses on his return, he grows out of it and becomes supportive of Moses.

The writing is also fantastic! The movie takes itself and its subject matter seriously, with plenty of drama, and not too much humor. And where there is humor in this movie, it's both completely natural and not at all mean-spirited, childish, distracting, or repetitive. The material involving the two High Priests, Hotep (Steve Martin) and Huy (Martin Short), in particular, is quite enjoyable, and it helps that the two don't overstay their welcome.

The voice-acting is incredible! Val Kilmer is very modest and down-to-earth as Moses. Ralph Fiennes brings a certain gravitas to Rameses, even when he fully turns evil. His British accent really adds something to it. Patrick Stewart is equally fabulous as Rameses's father, Seti, the previous pharaoh, and does a great job cementing his callousness. Michelle Pfieffer is fittingly spunky as Tzipporah. Everybody is well cast.

And finally, there's the music. Hans Zimmer scored the movie magnificently! His score really adds to the authentic Egyptian feel of this movie, and sounds really epic when it needs to. Likewise, the songs, written by Stephen Schwartz (who also wrote the amazing, complex songs of Hunchback with Alan Menken, and it shows) are equally stellar, especially the insanely beautiful end credits song "When You Believe", sung by Mariah Carey and Whitney Houston.

All in all, The Prince of Egypt truly is one of the greatest movies that DreamWorks Animation has ever made, and I think I might eventually get it on Blu-Ray. For those of you who haven't seen it, I recommend giving this movie a chance!

The Polar Express (2004)

A sublime Christmas classic!

[10/10 · 25 December 2023]

Merry Christmas, everybody! My older brother and I have a little Christmas tradition, in which before going to bed on Christmas Eve, we watch the beloved animated Christmas film, The Polar Express. In fact, my brother still remembers when we first saw it on TV in our hotel room on a trip to Barcelona, back in Spring 2005 (when I was barely 2, and he was 5). And it still holds up nineteen years later!

Based on Chris Van Allsburg's 1985 children's picture book of the same name, The Polar Express takes place at Christmas sometime in the 1950's, and centers on a young boy, simply known as the Hero Boy (voiced by Daryl Sabara, movements by Tom Hanks), who does not believe in Santa Claus. However, on Christmas Eve, he takes an amazing train trip to the North Pole, along with many other kids, and sets out on a journey of self-discovery, where he soon learns that the mysteries and wonders of life never fade for those who truly believe. In other words, it puts a strong new twist on the meaning of Christmas spirit by representing it as a test of faith. And director, producer and co-screenwriter Robert Zemeckis did a flawless job of adapting the book faithfully, and he also expanded the universe to make it into a feature-length film, by adding new situations and characters; namely a girl known as the Hero Girl (speaking voice and movements by Nona Gaye, singing voice by Meagan Moore), a lonely boy named Billy (speaking voice by Jimmy Bennett, singing voice by Matthew Hall, movements by Peter Scolari), a nerdy boy known as the Know-it-all Kid (Eddie Deezen), and the disappearing hobo (Tom Hanks).

The animation is extraordinary! This was the first movie ever to entirely use motion-capture animation, and it's aged like wine. Zemeckis managed to flawlessly implement the designs from Van Allsburg's illustrations into the models, and the faces of the Hero Boy and all the other kids in the movie, even the Hero Boy's little sister Sarah (voiced by Isabella Peregrina, movements by Leslie Zemeckis) still look exactly right for their age. You really can't tell that their movements were done by adults! The color scheme and sceneries, likewise, are downright gorgeous, and Zemeckis's dynamic camera moves and editing just add to it. The only problem is that sometimes, the characters' eyes look a little dead, resulting in some mild creepiness. But when it comes to mo-cap animation, I've definitely seen worse (Mars Needs Moms, anyone?).

And all of the characters are excellently developed! The Hero Boy is a very engaging and compelling protagonist. The Hero Girl, likewise, is very sweet, kind, and resourceful. Billy is also very trusting and well-developed. As for the Know-it-all Kid, though he's meant to be annoying and does come off that way at times, he's also super quotable and funny. But the Conductor (Tom Hanks) is my favorite character in the movie! He's very businesslike, and gets some of the best lines. The train's crew, Smokey and Steamer (both Michael Jeter, in his final performance before his death) are great comic relief characters (especially when Steamer breaks the throttle!). And the hobo is very helpful at times.

The voice-acting is amazing! Daryl Sabara supplies a certain earnestness as the Hero Boy. As the Hero Girl, Nona Gaye demonstrates that even at 30, she has the range to play a 12-year-old girl. Eddie Deezen is fittingly nerdy as the Know-it-all Kid. Jimmy Bennett retains that classic child's innocence as Billy. But in this movie, Tom Hanks really gets to show off his fabulous vocal range! While flawlessly using his natural voice as the Conductor and as the Hero Boy's adult narration, he gives a good, gravelly voice to the hobo, and a big, deep dignified voice to Santa.

Before wrapping things up, let me talk about the music. Zemeckis regular Alan Silvestri, also the genius behind the scores for Lilo and Stitch and Night at the Museum, delivered a beautiful, Christmassy score for this movie! And the original Christmas songs that he co-wrote with Glen Ballard are fabulous. "Hot Chocolate" is a very fun song that my brother and I like to sing along to, and so is the title song. In regards to the slower songs, "When Christmas Comes to Town", sung by Billy and the Hero Girl, is chillingly beautiful, and the same can be said for "Believe" in the end credits. While I rarely think highly of Josh Groban, the way he sings "Believe" just makes it a better song than it normally would be. The movie also fabulously chooses really good 40s/50s-era recordings of classic Christmas songs, including "Santa Claus is Comin' to Town" by Frank Sinatra.

All in all, The Polar Express is a sublime Christmas classic for several reasons. The animation is innovative and beautiful, the characters are marvelous, the music is wonderful, the script is excellent, the pacing is perfect, and it stays fully faithful to Van Allsburg's work. As such, it's a fabulous movie, and a compulsory viewing for Christmas.

Oh, by the way... "WHO IN THE BLAZES APPLIED THAT EMERGENCY BRAKE?!?!?!?!?!?!"

Home Alone (1990)

A John Hughes classic!

[9/10 · 22 December 2023]

Home Alone is renowned as one of the best movies John Hughes has ever written/produced, alongside The Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller's Day Off, and many others. And I couldn't agree more with that!

The movie centers on 8-year-old Kevin McCallister (played by Macaulay Culkin), who lives in Chicago. Kevin's massive family is planning a family trip to Paris for Christmas. Unfortunately, Kevin feels ignored and unloved by his family. And the night before the plane ride, after ruining dinner when his mean older brother, Buzz (Devin Ratray), goads Kevin into a fight by eating a cheese pizza reserved for him, and Kevin ends up being exiled to the attic by his mom, Kate (Catherine O'Hara), while Buzz gets off scot-free, an indignant Kevin hopes that he never sees his family again. Sure enough, that night, a winter storm sweeps the neighborhood, knocking out the McCallisters' power, and resetting the alarm clocks. The next morning, this leads to the McCallisters rushing chaotically to get ready, and in the ruckus, Kevin is left at home by mistake. Kevin believes that he made his family disappear, and enjoys himself at first, but begins to miss his family. To make matters worse, two burglars, Harry (Joe Pesci) and Marv (Daniel Stern), the "Wet Bandits", are scheming to rob the McCallister residence. So, while Kate frantically struggles to book the family a flight home, Kevin must defend his home from Harry and Marv's burglary.

All the characters are brilliantly written! Our hero, Kevin, is a very likable and relatable protagonist. I mean, right from the pizza scene, he lets us know how it feels to be ignored and unloved by family. Harry and Marv are great comedic villains! As for Old Man Marley (Roberts Blossom), the old man about who Buzz lied to Kevin, saying he was a murderer, (possible spoiler) when he finally speaks to Kevin, he's revealed to really be a kind-hearted old man, and a really good example of "Don't judge a book by its cover." (end possible spoiler) The only two unlikeable characters in the movie are Buzz and Kevin's rude uncle Frank (Gerry Bamman), who are both jerks. Although, Uncle Frank does get one of the best lines in the movie: "LOOK WHATCHA DID, YA LITTLE JERK!!!" HA!

The acting is tremendous. Macaulay Culkin is especially charming as Kevin. Nine years old, and already a real talent! Catherine O'Hara and John Heard (may he rest in peace) are praiseworthy as Kate and Kevin's father, Peter, respectively. Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern are hilarious as Harry and Marv!

Speaking of, the movie is packed from start to finish with delicious comedy! Those include Kevin watching a fake gangster movie called Angels With Filthy Souls ("Keep the change, ya filthy animal!") and later using that to trick the pizza boy, or burning himself with aftershave TWICE. But the comic highlight of this movie is the booby traps that Kevin puts Harry and Marv through when they try to rob his house! From the paint cans to the face, to Harry literally STANDING THERE as a blowtorch burns his head, to Marv letting out a PRICELESS scream when Kevin puts Buzz's tarantula on his face... you name it! This movie's humor knows no boundaries! But of course, it's John Hughes, what did we expect? The movie, of course, is also heartwarming at times, like when Old Man Marley's true self is revealed, and of course, the ending.

And, finally, the music! John Williams, the genius behind the scores of almost all of Steven Spielberg's movies, delivered a truly GORGEOUS score for this movie, special mention going to his mystical main theme. And don't get me started on the beautiful song that he composed, "Somewhere in my Memory." I actually sang along to that as I was watching this movie tonight.

All in all, Home Alone is one of the greatest movies John Hughes has ever made, and in my opinion, a must-see for anybody who loves comedy movies like me. Especially at Christmastime!!!

Oh, and by the way... "KEVIN!!!! WHAT DID YOU DO TO MY ROOM?!?!?!?!"

Home Alone 2: Lost in New York (1992)

Same basic plot, but same charm and laughs, new setting and material!

[10/10 · 20 December 2023]

While the original Home Alone is indeed a John Hughes classic, Home Alone 3 is okay, 4 and 5 get a few laughs now and then though 4 does the original two dirty, but Home Alone 6 is one of the irredeemably worst movies ever and has no reason to exist. Home Alone 2, however? Right up there alongside the original! In fact, I actually like it slightly better.

First off, the story. Once again, the McCallister Family is planning a Christmas trip, this time to Miami. And of course, the night before, Kevin (played by Macaulay Culkin, reprising his role just this once) gets in trouble for acting out and causing a mess again, only this time, when his nasty older brother Buzz (Devin Ratray) humiliates him during his choir solo at a school Christmas pageant, while as usual, Buzz gets away scot-free, because Kevin's mom, Kate (Catherine O'Hara), apparently didn't learn her lesson. This time, though, instead of the alarm clocks getting reset by a power outage caused by an overnight blizzard, they're reset by Kevin's father, Peter (John Heard), stupidly unplugging them and then plugging them back in. And instead of getting left behind in the chaos, Kevin does wake up in time for his family to not forget him... but gets separated from them in the mad dash through the airport after he stops to replace the batteries in his tape recorder. And in the confusion, Kevin ends up going to New York City instead of Miami, and takes his dad's bag with him. Using his dad's credit card, Kevin illegally books himself a suite at the Plaza Hotel. But once again, he encounters Harry (Joe Pesci) and Marv (Daniel Stern), who escaped from jail, and have snuck away to to rob toy stores. It's up to Kevin to stop them from robbing Duncan's Toy Chest just before Christmas.

Of course, none of the characters have changed since the first movie. Kevin is still the likeable protagonist he originally was. Harry and Marv are still the goofy burglars they were in the first movie. And of course, both Buzz and Kevin's rude uncle Frank (Gerry Bamman) are still the jerks they were in the first movie (though they do thank Kevin at the end).

The acting, of course, is fantastic. Everybody returns to their roles from the first movie, and their performances are just as great. Macaulay Culkin, in particular, still displays the same charisma as Kevin that he did in the first movie. Joe Pesci and Daniel Stern are still as hilarious as Harry and Marv as they were in the first movie. In regards to the new characters, Tim Curry is incredibly funny as the Concierge. Rob Schneider is equally amusing at times as Cedric, the bellboy.

And as you would expect from John Hughes, the writing is fabulous! All the humor in this movie makes me laugh every time. Especially the booby traps that Kevin lays down for Harry and Marv in his uncle Rob's empty house. So what if most of the humor is retreaded from the first movie?! What's important is that it's still funny, and a heckuva lot better than, say, the utter mean-spiritedness of Home Alone 6. Plus, Kevin comes up with some fresh, new traps for Harry and Marv. Other fresh, new jokes the movie has in store include the scene where Kevin records Uncle Frank singing tunelessly in the shower, only to get caught ("GET OUTTA HERE, YOU NOSY LITTLE PERVERT, OR I'M GONNA SLAP YOU SILLY!!!!"), and later uses that recording and an inflatable clown to scare off the Concierge. The movie is also heartwarming at times, like when Kevin befriends the Pigeon Lady (Brenda Fricker), even if she's a carbon copy of Old Man Marley from the first movie.

And of course, there's the music. John Williams returned to score this movie, and he did a FABULOUS job. He weaved in the melody to "Somewhere In My Memory" from the first movie, and even co-wrote two wonderful new songs: "Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas", and the CHILLINGLY beautiful "Christmas Star".

In short, out of all the Home Alone sequels, this is the only one that comes out just as good as, or even better, than the classic original. Heavily recommended!!!!

Elf (2003)

A brilliant Christmas comedy!

[10/10 · 18 December 2023]

I remember when I first saw Elf at a specialized showing at AMC Theater in Neshaminy Mall back in 2009. And I love it!

Elf centers around Buddy (played by Will Ferrell), a 30-year-old man, who as a orphaned baby, snuck into Santa Clause's (Ed Asner) sack on Christmas Eve, at the orphanage that he lived in. After being brought back to the North Pole by mistake, Buddy was raised by one of Santa's elves, Papa Elf (Bob Newhart), and grew up thinking his entire life that he was an elf... despite being three times the size of the other elves, and being the slowest at making toys. Upon learning that he's a human, Buddy departs from the North Pole and travels down to New York City, without shedding his elf garments, to meet his birthfather, Walter Hobs (James Caan)... who turns out to be a cynical and self-centered businessman, and on Santa's naughty list. Because Walter never even knew that Buddy was born, he takes Buddy to a doctor for a DNA test, and finds, to his dismay, that Buddy is indeed his son. As a result, Walter is forced to start a relationship with Buddy. And the results get more and more chaotic.

The acting is brilliant. Will Ferrell is hilarious as Buddy. James Caan (may he rest in peace) is magnificent as Walter. I really like the contrast that their performances create between Buddy and Walter. While Buddy is incredibly good-natured and kind, but naive and simple-minded, Walter is cynical and small-minded. Ed Asner (may he also rest in peace) is perfect as Santa. Zooey Deschanel is really good as Jovie, the resentful, standoffish Gimbels employee that Buddy falls for. She starts off bitter and cold, but really softens up as the movie goes on. Plus, she has an amazing singing voice.

The movie is also jam-packed with comedy that hits every right note! Favorite scenes of mine include Buddy chugging 2 whole liters of Coke and then unleashing a KILLER 12-second burp (dubbed in by Maurice LaMarche, one of the most brilliant voice-actors alive), getting into a fight with the Gimbels Santa after discovering that he's fake, wandering into the women's locker room when he hears Jovie singing in the shower, putting syrup and candy all over a plate of spaghetti (Mmmmm!), and answering a phone call meant for Walter: "Buddy the Elf, what's your favorite color?" HA! Oh, and the scene of him mistaking renowned children's author Miles Finch (played by the FLAWLESSLY cast Peter Dinklage) for an elf. PRICELESS! The movie is also heartwarming at times, like with Buddy and Jovie's falling-in-love montage, and Walter finally warming up to Buddy.

The music is also great! I panned John Debney's score for Home Alone 6, but his score for this movie is beautiful and amazing, and really sells that Christmas vibe. The songs choices are also really good.

Everything considered, Elf is a triumph at Christmas uplift and comedy, and one of my favorites to watch at Christmas. If you don't believe me, watch it for yourself! You'll be laughing like crazy.

Home Sweet Home Alone (2021)

NO!

[1/10 · 17 December 2023]

I watched this movie when it first started streaming on Disney+ at Christmas two years ago. And that was enough for me! This is without a doubt the worst movie in the Home Alone franchise! The first two are classics, the 3rd one is okay, and the 4th and 5th are at best, only mildly funny (though the former really does the first two dirty). But this one? This thing is abominable.

First of all, the story is ridiculous. It focuses on Jeff McKenzie (played by Rob Delaney) and his wife Pam (Ellie Kemper), who live in Chicago with their two kids, and are on the verge of losing their house, because Jeff is out of a job. As soon as they find out that a malformed doll that they own is worth a lot of money, they plan to sell it on eBay, but find it missing. They end up suspecting that a British (for whatever reason) 12-year-old boy named Max Mercer (Archie Yates), who stopped at their home with his mother during an open house to use the restroom, stole it. Meanwhile, Max has accidentally been left home alone by his family (sound familiar?), who's going to Tokyo, because he fell asleep while hiding out in the car, watching cartoons. So, what do Jeff and Pam do? They plan to break into Max's house to steal the doll back, without talking to Max about it. Max misinterprets it as a planned kidnapping, so he booby-traps his house just for them. Yeah. That is the stupidest conflict I've ever heard of.

In regards to the characters: Max, our so-called "hero", is wholly obnoxious. He has none of the character depth or charm of our TRUE hero, Kevin McCallister, from the first two movies. He's just an incredibly one-dimensional little brat, and early on, all we see of him is him complaining to his mom for not getting him McDonald's, whining that he hates his family, with no explanation as to why. Remember the pizza scene in the original movie? That was where we learned why we were expected to root for Kevin; he felt like his family mistreated him. Here, there's no such scene. Instead, more screentime is devoted to Jeff and Pam, and it ends up making THEM easier to root for. And because of that, the physical pain that Max inflicts on them is actually not funny at all. What made the pain that Kevin inflicted on Harry and Marv hilarious in the first two movies was that they were actually burglars who DERSERVED it, and the same can be said for the 3rd, 4th and 5th movies. Here, the so-called "burglars" are actually completely innocent, though very stupid people, with sympathetic motivations, so the slapstick that Max puts them through is just mean-spirited.

*spoiler*Even worse, it ends up being all for nothing, because the REAL thief was Jeff and Pam's nephew. And then, when he gives the doll back, they thank him for "saving the day", and forgive Max after clearing up the misunderstanding! WHAT?!!!?*end spoiler*

Also, the special effects: remember the amazing practical effects from the first couple movies? Well, this movie throws that out in favor of horrible CGI effects, even for 2021's standards, ESPECIALLY compared to the amazing CGI in all the movies by Marvel Studios! Have people forgotten how to animate CGI effects over the years?!

The acting is atrocious, ESPECIALLY by Archie Yates as Max! He shows none of the talent that Macaulay Culkin showed as Kevin. Even Rob Delaney and Ellie Kemper don't seem to care at all about their roles. It seems like nobody was trying at all. By the way, this movie contains a cameo by Devin Ratray, who reprises his role as Kevin's bullying older brother, Buzz, from the first two movies (so this movie wisely ignores the 4th movie), now grown up to be a police officer. Unfortunately, though he does mention Kevin and the events of the first two movies, even he can't save this!

And of course, there's the music. John Debney's score is so lame, and in fact, I don't even remember how any of the cues go! Especially compared to John Williams's amazing score from the first two movies. Not to mention, there's a blasphemous misuse of "Somewhere in my Memory", that gorgeous song from the first movie. It's awful.

So, everything considered, this movie is abominable and does this wonderful franchise dirty. If you see this movie listed on Disney+, don't be tempted. Avoid at all costs!

Bad Santa (2003)

Bad Santa, Great Movie

[10/10 · 17 December 2023]

Willie T. Soke (Billy Bob Thornton) is a raging alcoholic, who at Christmas, poses as a department store Santa Claus, while his dwarf partner-in-crime Marcus (Tony Cox), poses as an elf. When off duty, they case the department store they work at and rob it on Christmas Eve every year. When they're hired at the anchor store Chamberlain's at the Saguaro Square Mall in Phoenix, Arizona, Willie befriends a chubby, lonely boy named Thurman Merman (Brett Kelly) and a barmaid with Santa issues named Sue (Lauren Graham). But Willie and Marcus encounter an obstacle: mall security guard Gin Slagel (Bernie Mac), who muscles in on their action.

Bad Santa is a truly brilliant black Christmas movie from start to finish. The acting is terrific. Billy Bob Thornton is incredibly good as Willie. Tony Cox is hilarious as Marcus. And Brett Kelly is tremendous as Thurman. Heck, everybody does great with their roles.

The writing is top-notch, too! I'm one of those people who loves vulgar humor. And from start to finish, Bad Santa is loaded with vulgar comedy and sexual situations. That includes Willie and Marcus's heated debates, Willie making out with Sue, Willie constantly yelling at Thurman when Thurman asks him stupid questions, and Willie trying to teach Thurman how to stand up for himself in the face of bullies. The dialogue is top-notch, especially from Marcus. All the characters are also well-rounded and unforgettable.

And let's not forget the music. David Kitay's score for this movie is energetic and pleasant to listen to, and sounds suspenseful when needed. The movie also makes it a point to include classical music, which works fabulously.

All in all, Bad Santa is a hilarious and delightful black Christmas movie. If you don't like raunchy or demented comedy, then this movie isn't for you. Otherwise, get a taste of it! You won't be disappointed. And if you do, I recommend the theatrical cut, because it's the best.

How the Grinch Stole Christmas (2000)

I like it!

[8/10 · 16 December 2023]

Tonight, I watched this movie adaptation of Dr. Suess's How the Grinch Stole Christmas. In fact, I've seen it multiple times over the years. And I like it!

Of course, it's not entirely faithful to the book, but hey, the book is so short you can tell it in 15 minutes! They had to stretch it out somehow. They do keep a lot of those wacky words that Dr. Suess put in his books. And I was very pleased with what new material director Ron Howard and the writers Jeffrey Price and Peter Seaman (who wrote Who Framed Roger Rabbit, which I'll need to see sooner or later, as well as Shrek the Third, which is my second favorite Shrek movie behind Shrek 2) put in. Instead of just hating the Whos and Christmas for no reason at all, the Grinch (played by Jim Carrey) is given a tragic backstory, in which all his life, he was mistreated by the Whos. The Whos, likewise, are depicted as less sympathetic and much more materialistic than in the book, which helped make the Grinch more likeable by comparison. This movie also adds a REAL villain, Whoville's mayor Augustus May Who (Jeffrey Tambor), who's bullying of the Grinch was the true cause of the Grinch becoming who he is. Cindy Lou Who (six-year-old Taylor Momsen) is given more personality, and made more likeable. The movie also gives the Grinch a love interest, Martha May Whovier (Christine Baranski), who is also the love interest of May Who. She's also the kindest resident of Whoville besides Cindy and the two Who biddies who raised the Grinch.

The acting is really good. Jim Carrey, however, really stands out! He is out-and-out hilarious as the Grinch, and makes every scene that he's in a standout piece that never fails to make me laugh. From his over-the-top line deliveries, to his exaggerated facial expressions, to his insanely hammy movements, you really can't tell how insanely uncomfortable he was in that costume and makeup! Taylor Momsen is wonderful as Cindy. She perfectly captures the mix of child's earnestness and poignancy in her character. But everybody else does good with their roles, too!

In regards to the visuals: the cinematography is incredible! The set design for Whoville is gorgeous, and very Seussian. The special effects are still amazing by today's standards. That much being said, all of the adult and teen Whos look pretty off, what with their canine-looking noses and lack of visible lips, especially right next to the Who children (including Cindy), who more or less look like regular human children, aside from the buckteeth. The sole exception would be Martha, whose nose is sculpted to be MUCH more humanlike, likely to make her look the most attractive.

And there's the music. As is to be expected, James Horner, like the talented composer he was, delivered a truly beautiful score for this movie. The power ballad that he and lyricist Will Jennings (with whom he had previously written "My Heart Will Go On", the famous and beautiful love theme from Titanic) adapted from his main theme, "Where Are You, Christmas?", sung by Faith Hill in the end credits (additional material written by Mariah Carey), and its shorter counterpart, "Christmas, Why Can't I Find You?", sung by Cindy in the movie itself, is also one of the most gorgeous Christmas songs I've heard in my life (especially the former version). The movie also features a handful of songs Horner had no involvement with, like "Green Christmas" by the Barenaked Ladies. They're really great.

All in all, I thoroughly enjoy this movie! I'm also a big Jim Carrey fan, and truth be told, this is the first movie I ever saw him in. Unless you're a Dr. Suess purist, I recommend giving this movie a chance!

(lasted edit: 12/20/23)

A Christmas Story (1983)

A timeless Christmas classic!

[10/10 · 14 December 2023]

Last night, I went to see A Christmas Story, which celebrates its 40th anniversary this year, at my local theater. And I can tell you this: whether you see it on the big screen, or in the comforts of your own home (as me and my family have done for years), it is a wonderful movie!

Set in the fictitious town of Hohman, Indiana at Christmastime 1940, A Christmas Story centers on 9-year-old Ralphie Parker (played by Peter Billingsley), who wants just one thing for Christmas: a Red Ryder carbine-action 200-shot Range Model air rifle. But everyone he talks about it to, from his mom (Melinda Dillon) to his teacher, to even Santa at Higbee's, gives him the same response: "You'll shoot your eye out." Thanks in part to writer Jean Shepherd's brilliant narration as adult Ralphie, the movie has fabulous worldbuilding, and really fleshes out all the characters; especially Ralphie and his family. One thing that makes this movie timeless is that Ralphie and his family and the people they interact with don't feel like old-fashioned people; they feel like people we know even now. In particular, the sibling energy between Ralphie and his little brother Randy (Ian Petrella) reminds me of how my older brother and I acted toward each other as kids.

Likewise, the acting is brilliant in this movie! As Ralphie, Peter Billingsley demonstrates remarkable talent, even for the age of 9. Ian Petrella plays Randy like the most realistic 6-year-old you'd ever meet in your life. But the two that stand out are Melinda Dillon and Darren McGavin (may he rest in peace) as Ralphie's parents. Their back-and-forth is truly magical. Darren McGavin, in particular is hilarious as Ralphie's old man.

The movie also has a fabulous script, comedy and such memorable scenes and quotes. The banters between Ralphie's two best friends, Flick (Scott Schwartz) and Schwartz (R. D. Robb), are super entertaining, especially the scene where Flick is triple-dog dared by Schwartz to stick his tongue on the school flagpole, goes through with it, and ends up with a bandaged tongue. There's also the storyline regarding the old man's "major award", the famous leg lamp. Other highlights include Ralphie getting a bar of soap in his mouth for saying a dirty word ("Ohhhhhh, ffffffuuuuuuuudge!" "Only I didn't say fudge." HA!), the old man beating on the faulty furnace while swearing in gibberish, Ralphie's melodramatic fantasies, Ralphie beating bully Scut Farkus (Zack Ward) senseless while cursing up a storm, and let's NOT forget the truly brilliant scene of Ralphie visiting Higbee's Santa. That is indeed, as Roger Ebert said, the best department store Santa visit ever captured on film! And whenever we get a Christmas tree every year, my brother and I always quote the Christmas tree salesman: "Now, HERE'S a tree! This here is a TREE!"

And last but not least, there's the music. True to form, Paul Zaza and Carl Zittrer wove some classic Christmas tunes into this movie's score. They also perfectly chose all the songs to use!

All in all, A Christmas Story is a fabulous Christmas movie that will never age! In fact, I consider it one of THE movies to watch around Christmastime!

1941 (1979)

So much fun!

[9/10 · 8 December 2023]

Steven Spielberg is known for his powerful masterpieces, such as Jaws, E. T., Jurassic Park, and many others. But hey, every once in a while, even a director of his caliber needs to loosen and make a wacky movie. And his first screwball comedy (and first ever flop) 1941, is a prime example of that.

Right off the bat, 1941 lets us know just what kind of movie we're in for by parodying the opening of Jaws (with even the same actress!), and then on, we get a glorious premise of Three Stooges-meets-WWII, in which the Japanese invade Los Angeles in the weeks leading up to Christmas 1941, and instead of banding together, the Americans stir up a ruckus, and end up constantly shooting themselves in the foot as a result. All the way through, this movie hits every right note, slapstick-wise. Because a juvenile, destructive comedy is what 1941 is meant to be, and it delivers! It probably helps that this movie's writers were Bob Gale (who later wrote Back to the Future) and the amazing Robert Zemeckis.

In addition, 1941 boasts an impressive cast. That includes John Belushi, Dan Akroyd (yep, the BLUES BROTHERS star in this!!! Pity they never cross paths, though, aside from sharing a salute at the very end.), Lorraine Gary, Murray Hamilton (both from Jaws!), and many, many others. The special effects are also top-notch, like a real WWII epic. I was really impressed with all the scenes of the tanks and what not! The music score by John Williams, who once again, delivered a quality score for Spielberg, is fabulous, and perfect for a military movie.

When all's said and done, I understand, 1941 is nothing more than a comic pileup, but hey, that's what it's meant to be, and I love comedy! Just because it's a war movie doesn't mean it has to be serious. If you're really a fan of Spielberg, give this movie a shot! You'll be laughing all the way through.

Wish (II) (2023)

Why the low ratings?

[7/10 · 26 November 2023]

Last night, I went with a friend of mine to the theater to see Disney's newest movie, Wish. And after I saw it, I was shocked by the negative reviews I was finding on YouTube. Yeah, it's very derivative, but what else isn't to like?

Wish centers on a 17-year-old girl, named Asha (voiced by Ariana Debose), who lives in the Kingdom of Rosas. In Rosas, people give their wishes to the ruler and founder, King Magnifico (Chris Pine), who promises to eventually grant them. Magnifico is seen in the eyes of the people of Rosas as a caring, loving king, but Asha soon finds out that he's actually very dictatorial, and only grants wishes that he feels are good, and keeps all the other wishes locked up permanently. Feeling that all of the people of Rosas are genuinely good and deserve to have their wishes granted, Asha pleads to the stars, and her wish is answered by an anthropomorphic ball of energy and light from the sky, named Star. With the help of her seven friends, her pet goat Valentino (Alan Tudyk), and Star, Asha must stop Magnifico and show the people of Rosas what amazing things can happen when a courageous human's will connects with the stars.

So yeah, storytelling-wise, Wish feels like a blend between its own movie, and a celebration of Disney's 100th anniversary (which is even the way it was intended), generally due its frequent throwbacks to all the old, classic Disney movies. And indeed, Wish's nostalgic elements do drag it down. Half the time, Wish does feel very derivative, but it does put its own spin on the definition of wishes: they're not just people's heart's desires, they're part of people's identities and part of what makes everyone on the planet unique.

And Wish does compensate for an overdone and generic premise and very hit-or-miss humor with likeable, charming characters, and constantly finding ways to make the story exciting. Furthermore, Magnifico is the first straightforward Disney villain we've had since Mother Gothel from Tangled (RELEASED 13 YEARS AGO!!!!!). And though he's rather unoriginal, he's a fun villain, and does build into a legitimate threat.

In regards to the animation, I was impressed. For this movie, Disney decided to put their own spin on CGI animation by blending it with their classic watercolor animation. All the characters are well-designed, and their movements are expressive and smooth. That being said, I do wish (hehe, see what I did there?) Disney would go back to traditional animation. I mean, they did that with the short Once Upon a Studio, so come on! Traditional animation is what Disney was built on.

The voice-acting is very good. Ariana DeBose is absolutely beautiful as Asha, and helps flesh her out and make her likeable. She truly gives the part everything she's got. But Chris Pine gives easily the best vocal performance in this movie, and makes a delightful villain as Magnifico. You can tell he loved this role. And once Valentino (by the way, that's the name of my uncle's dog) gains the ability to talk, Alan Tudyk (pretty much the John Ratzenberger of Disney's movies) gives him a gravelly voice that fits his personality, but doesn't fit his cute design (Disney has done this before, think back to John Travolta, when he voiced Bolt the dog with a strong, manly voice that matched Bolt's fearless personality but not his adorable appearance), though here, that's the intended joke. In fact, everybody else in this movie does great with their roles, too.

And of course, there's the music. Disney orchestrator Dave Metzger delivers a fine score for this movie, and the songs, written by Julia Michaels and Benjamin Rice are good, too. Not exactly the best songs I've heard from Disney, but very enjoyable nonetheless. Each one helps serve the story, and gives the movie that musical theater feel, while adding in some present-day pop elements, sorting of giving them a blend of new and old. Magnifico even gets a really great villain song, "This is the Thanks I Get". Yeah, it's pretty upbeat for a villain song, but Disney's done it before (the very first Disney villain song, "Hi-Diddle-Dee-Dee" from Pinocchio, an otherwise really disturbing classic, was campy and fun).

All in all, Wish is definitely not the grand masterpiece that everyone had been hoping for. It's definitely dragged down by its constant throwbacks to prior Disney movies, resulting in a derivative plot. But it's a back-to-basics movie for Disney, and as such, it works. Added to which, as a Disney fan, I feel it's a perfectly enjoyable movie anyway. If you're a really big fan of Disney, go see Wish!

Planes, Trains & Automobiles (1987)

A comedy classic, perfect for Thanksgiving

[10/10 · 23 November 2023]

With Thanksgiving coming tomorrow, I watched this movie tonight with my dad. And what can I even say?!?!

This movie centers on uptight marketing executive Neal Page (Steve Martin), who after being on a business trip to New York City, just wants to get home to Chicago in time to have Thanksgiving with his family. But along the way, he experiences every travel setback remotely possible. From a diverted (way out of the way, may I add) and then cancelled flight, to stolen cash, to a train randomly breaking down, to being ripped off by a car rental agency, nothing seems to ever go right for poor Neal! What's more, all the way, he's stuck with good-natured and generous, yet clumsy and chatty shower ring salesman Del Griffith (John Candy), who just can't take a hint when to shut up. Together, as Neal and Del progress to Chicago, they gradually put aside their differences and develop a rather odd friendship.

The acting is fantastic. Steve Martin is truly fabulous as Neal. John Candy, a comedy legend gone WAY too soon, is out-and-out hilarious as Del. They bring so much of themselves to flesh out their respective characters, and their comedic chemistry is so believable. But everybody else does great with their roles as well.

The writing and script are top-notch, too! The movie is just packed with brilliant comedy from start to finish, both physical and in spoken dialogue. Most of it is supplied by Del, especially by hilariously distracting himself from driving while grooving to "The Mess Around". But hey, this is John Hughes (the man behind The Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller's Day Off and Home Alone) we're talking about! One highlight of his genius comedic writing in this movie is that it has an R rating because of ONE SCENE: the scene of a battered and seething Neal delivering a LEGENDARY f-bomb-loaded speech to the car rental agent (Edie McClurg) over being ripped off. Also, be on the lookout for a cleverly-placed silent cameo by Kevin Bacon (at the time, fresh from the set of She's Having a Baby), who races Neal for a cab in New York City, and wins. And along with that, the movie is also heartwarming, without ever getting corny. The movie's arsenal of touching moments includes Neal and Del's heart-to-heart chats, and the happy ending that Neal gets, in which

(possible spoiler)

he finally makes it home to his family in time for Thanksgiving dinner, and introduces them to Del.

(end possible spoiler)

And to cap it all off, there's the music. Frequent Hughes collaborator and The Blues Brothers music director Ira Newborn delivered an amazing, synth-laden score for this movie. It's truly a mark on just how delightfully 1980's this movie is! And all the song choices are really great, too.

All in all, Planes, Trains and Automobiles is an excellent movie, arguably one of the best (if not THE best) John Hughes has ever made, and I recommend it to anyone who loves comedy films as much as I do. Also, this is THE movie to watch around Thanksgiving!

Oh, and one more thing: "THOSE AREN'T PILLOWS!!"

E.T. (1982)

Words don't do it justice!

[10/10 · 4 August 2023]

E. T. the Extra-Terrestrial is considered by everyone to be a masterpiece, and I couldn't agree more. Everything about this heartwarming movie about friendship is perfection!

All of the acting in this movie, by Henry Thomas as Elliot Taylor, Dee Wallace as his mother, Mary, a young Drew Barrymore as his little sister Gertie, Robert MacNaughton as his big brother Michael, and everyone else, is magnificent and believable. Everyone is perfectly cast!

As for E. T. himself, I liked everything about him. His design is strange in the most adorable way imaginable, he has a very likeable, curious personality, and his unique, raspy voice, supplied by Pat Welsh (may she rest in peace), is absolutely excellent and suits him perfectly. I also really enjoyed all the magic tricks that he performed.

Also, the special effects are incredible! All of them! The puppetry used for E. T., the spaceship, the chroma key for the flying bikes... you name it! Like I said, literally EVERYTHING about this movie is excellent! The cinematography, the editing, the costumes, and most importantly, the stunning musical score by musical wiz John Williams, with special mention going to his beautiful "Flying Theme".

Also, along with all the poignancy that makes this movie so great, there's great comedy that's never forced or overdone (especially the bit of E. T. getting drunk)! And Elliott's dog, Harvey, is very cute.

All in all, E. T. is a very touching and fun movie about friendship, and among the best movies Steven Spielberg has ever done. I can't tell you how many times I've rewatched this movie, and I never get tired of it! Highly recommended!!!!!