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Reviews
The Shape of Water (2017)
Wanted to like it, but just can't
The Shape of Water (like Beauty and the Beast) is proof that the world thinks that women are so starved for love and affection that they will fall in love with ANYTHING. (Scales or fur? No problem!) And I'm not just going to fall in love, actually going to have sex with it. (Dare we judge lonely farmers?) By contrast, men have Splash... (Yeah, she's got a tail but she looks like a super model and has legs when she's out of the water, so I'd do her!)
Putting aside the bestiality, the fact that you can make a 7' pool in a bathroom just by closing the door, the fact that a creature from the Amazon RIVER would need salt water, the completely out of nowhere dance number, the unnecessary female nudity, the cat owner who doesn't blink an eye when his cat gets eaten, or the fact that they have to wait for it to rain to release him into the canals as opposed to just driving him directly to the ocean, The Shape of Water is an EPIC FAIL for one major reason. You have a Mexican director casting a Brit to play the one major Latina starring role in 2017. No wonder less than 5% of roles are played by Latinos when we don't hire our own.
The Invitation (2015)
A slow burn that doesn't make much sense
I usually don't mind if a film is slow in its set up if it means that I get to know the characters and learn more about why the're there. My main issues with this film are that 1) I have a hard time believing that anyone would stay at a party where the hosts are acting so strange and 2) that other than the 3 main characters, I had no idea who anyone else was. There is no real explanation of why the main character would go to a party thrown by his ex wife and her new husband. His girlfriend is one of these characters that just walks and talks but doesn't seem to add anything to the story other than to add a possible body for the slaughter. In fact, I'd completely forgot that she was there until she spoke again halfway through the film. Other than that, the film has some excellent acting and it looks fantastic. I also liked the end, because of the sinister outlook for all humanity that it implied.
All Girls Weekend (2016)
Good flick if you adjust your expectations
First, I wish that film distributors would stop doing artwork that doesn't match anything that remotely happens in the film. Also, please don't do trailers that show all the good parts of the film. That being said, I really enjoyed this film. It was a fun, low-budget adventure with some horrific aspects to it, but it's not a gore fest or a big jump scare fest. It has a fun story with a supernatural twist to it, but the part that I enjoyed the most was the adventure part of it. I got lost in the grand canyon, so to me, that is a scary situation regardless of anything supernatural. Acting is a lot better than other low budget films I watch, and there were some funny parts to it. I really enjoyed the views, especially the scenes in the snow. If you're not expecting a high budget, Hollywood gore-fest, you will enjoy it too.