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Reviews
The Firm (1993)
FOH!
Awful acting, weird cinematography, story line was soft. This movie looks like it was made 50 years ago. Tom Cruise is a pudwacker.
Barry (2018)
Season 2 is Soft
Barry became a baby in season 2. I liked it better when he was whacking people. This "feelings" and emotional Barry is soft, not entertaining. Hard 5/10 rating.
Yellowstone (2018)
Deserves Wayyy More Attention
Fantastic! Kind of like the Sopranos, for people who live and die in their boots. Great cast, solid writing. I just wish there were more episodes in Season one. This is a good one, enjoy it with a beer, or 12.
Capone (2020)
Scarface would be rolling in his grave!
Luckily the real Capone isn't alive to see this.. or he'd be on a tear to get even with those responsible for this film. Tom Hardy may never recover from this disaster. It came across as a comedy. Yikes... bikes!
For Love of the Game (1999)
Over the Top
Kevin Costner would romanticize taking a dump. This movie is just too over the top. I forgot it was a baseball story several times throughout the film. It took a little over 2 hours to tell a tale that could have been fit into a half hour tv show. Won't watch it again, unless I'm going through a nasty divorce, and need to feel even worse.
Hanna (2011)
Hanna is a fat girls name
I know this is a spoiler. But, read the title... enough said.
The Fanatic (2019)
Watched this on the Toilet
I don't know what else to say. I watched this movie in the John... Volume on level 100 to cover up my "noises". I'm not sure if it was the smell, or the sound of Travolta's acting, but NOBODY was anywhere to be found when I came out of the stall. Just another notch in the best of John Travolta's illustrious career belt. I cannot wait for YOU to not watch this.
Rating this "stinker" a medium hardness 2/10. Only because Devon Sawa saved his classmates from an exploding airplane back in 2000... thoughts and prayers to those affected by Flight 180!
Life on the Line (2015)
This ISH is straight Fire!!
This ISH is straight Fire!! Just kidding.
John Travolta has yet again managed to completely and utterly s*** the bed. I am baffled with this guy and his career choices. I don't want anyone with eyes to see this, EVER! This flick rivals the great Indian Ocean Tsunami of 2004, in terms of disaster. And I say that with a heavy heart for the victims, and their families.
Be safe out there everybody, and don't watch this junk.
Rated a Hard 3 out of 10, strictly because Devon Sawa was Junior in the Little Giants.
Deep Impact (1998)
Armageddon > Deep Impact
Hollywood must have been reeling in the late 90's for original ideas.
If you ordered Armageddon from Wish, Deep Impact is what would show up in your mailbox.
Terrific cast.. Awful acting.. CGI below average (even for 1998).. Poorly planned story..
Watching this film during the COVID-19 outbreak was a mistake, and a total waste of quarantine time. Sad face
Bruce Willis for life, y'all!!!
Hunt to Kill (2010)
This movie made me want to k*ll myself?!?! Yes it did!!
The acting in this production is worse than anything I've ever seen in my entire life. And I've been to several elementary school plays. Gil Bellows gives the performance of his career! I've never seen a mentally handicapped evil leader with zero presence or self awareness played so perfectly! Stone Cold is an absolute moron, through and through. If I ever saw Steve Austin in real life, I've rub poo all over his motorcycle seat, solely based off of how terrible this film was. Please don't waste your beautiful life watching this dumpster fire. Netflix should give us all a free month for putting this trashy flick on their service. Unbelievable!!!
Disturbing the Peace (2020)
I need counseling now
I've seen some stinkers before, but this is BY FAR the worst movie I've watched EVER. I have to attend counseling now, because I've become so neurotic after having viewed this presentation. Go to your local Redbox, family video, etc. rent it, and destroy it! Help your fellow man.
Motherless Brooklyn (2019)
Hard to Stay Wake 😴
What a phenomenal cast! And, what a phenomenal disappointment! It's slow, it's tiring, it's nothing like the trailers suggested. 2 hours of life I'll never get back. I'd rather watch a Roseanne marathon, than 5 more minutes of this snore fest! Keep it moving people, this film is a let down on multiple levels. But, most of all, it's just straight up BORING! BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
Good Boys (2019)
Overhyped
Seth Rogan has done it again! Overhyped AF! Everything in this movie has been done many, many times before. This version just uses 12 year olds. It's an semi-original idea, inside an unoriginal dynasty of unoriginality. Wait until it comes out on STARZ or HBO. 5/10 and that's generous y'all.
G-Force (2009)
Ruined My Weekend
Girl I'm dating has a kid. She's 7. I had to watch this on a Saturday evening. It ruined my weekend.
The Poison Rose (2019)
Must Watch! Seriously bro
So bad you have to check it out!! Get a 12 pack, wait.... You'll need an 18 - 24 pack. And drink each time you see (awful acting, a terrible accent, huge plot holes, Brendan Frasier's "hair", or anytime someone in the movie drinks). Be sure to call off work, you'll be bombed after this activity.. I haven't seen this many stars in a disaster since Sharknado. Hold on to your beer people this movies a s*** show!!
The Silence (2019)
If this were grade school, this would get a "U"
Unsatisfactory.. The girl whom is deaf, (even though not born that way) would not be able to control her volume/enunciate/speak as if she weren't deaf. SHE CANT HEAR HERSELF!! This movie is Booty. Its a knock-off of like 9 other movies that did the same thing, with different senses. Imagine a world where writers were original... Kriss Kross would say, this film is "wiggity wiggity wiggity wack"!
Move on folks, because with this Netflix Original, there is nothing the see.
Graded at a soft 3/10
Yellowstone (2018)
Deserves Wayyy More Attention
Fantastic! Kind of like the Sopranos, for people who live and die in their boots. Great cast, solid writing. I just wish there were more episodes in Season one. This is a good one, enjoy it with a beer, or 12.
Speed Kills (2018)
Please Don't Do This to Yourselves!
There are probably worse movies in the world, I just haven't seen them.
The story line, cinematography, characters, even the props & extras were disasterous. Im not a betting man. But, I'd put the over/under on filming, at about 6 days. This was clearly shot on an 2004 Nokia flip phone, with a peanut butter smear over the lense. Travolta's hair looks like that black hair spray (AS SEEN ON TV) tried to sell for balding men in the mid-90's... Just an overall flop, from start to finish.
Please take into consideration, the average lifespan of a human in 2019. Don't waste an hour and a half of it on this disaster.
Bayou Caviar (2018)
I've Seen Worse
This flick isn't nearly as terrible as the other members ratings suggest. Cuba was believable as a hoodlum boxer. And everyone else did their part. It won't win any awards, but it's not a bad Sunday afternoon choice. Overall I gave it a 5/10.
The Oath (2018)
Pretty Crumby!
This movie was an hour too long. I wouldnt consider this a comedy, because I didn't even crack a smile. Decent cast, dumb script, and several scenes were dragged out too long. And very repetitive dialogue throughout the entire movie. Overall, pretty crumby!