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Borat Subsequent Moviefilm: Delivery of Prodigious Bribe to American Regime for Make Benefit Once Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan (2020)
Cohen is the greatest performers in history.
SBC's dedication to his craft is mind boggling. His ability to maintain composure during the outlandishly bizarre situations he creates in this film is godlike.
This is art of the highest form. A deep sociological study into US society and celebrity. It seemed impossible for him to make this film. He retired the character after the first movie because it doesn't seem to work if people recognize him, but he made it work.
He spent an entire month with two hermits and pushed the limits of their comfort by staying in character the entire time, doing his workouts in close proximity to them while wearing almost nothing. Manipulating them into creating an extremely offensive song, which he then performs on stage in front of an unsuspecting audience in Olympia WA, who, after joining in and singing along gleefully, chased him to his RV likely with the intent to kill him once they realize they were being pranked and mocked.
However good SBC's performance is though, Maria Bakalova steals the spotlight. She matches his capacity for granite composure during even the most absurd situations, and goes above and beyond to give the audience the best outcome possible.
This film is an absolute masterpiece in every way. Sacha Baron Cohen is truly a genius and I hope he produces a bottomless portfolio of works like this before he retires or is killed by one of the lunatics he has the boulder sized stones to prank.
Monarch: Legacy of Monsters: Beyond Logic (2024)
All they have to do is show Godzilla for at least 30 seconds to satisfy this audience.
The whole season people have been leaving low reviews because everyone expected this show to feature a bunch of titans, and they've probably gotten less than five minutes of total screen time in the entire ten hours of airtime.
But the two episodes where Godzilla showed up for more than 15 seconds, boom, great reviews, "This show is back on track!"
I feel like it's glaringly obvious that these creators know exactly what they are doing. They knew their audience was itching for A SERIES featuring state of the art CGI Titan battles. And they gave their audience as tiny of a dose as they could possibly get away with.
The rest of the story in this show is pretty underwhelming. I admit with no shame that I am one of those that was hoping to see some epic Titan battles, and feel like I've been scammed, but I also love Kirk Douglas and tuned in specifically because I saw he was on the cast. However his character is one of the most underwhelming parts of the show for me.
So far, this show doesn't seem to know what it needs to be, but I am hopeful that they were just creating an atmosphere in Season 1, and it will be one of those series where, when you recommend it, you have to tell people that they have to get past S1, because the rest of the show is legendary.
Sadly, if that's the case, they definitely failed to get me deeply invested in any of the characters (besides Godzilla). But I'll keep watching with the hopes that I am right that they were just setting the stage for Godzilla to take on all sorts of new and exciting Titans that we have never seen before.
Cam (2018)
Deleted scenes shouldn't have been deleted IMO.
There's a lot of people trying to interpret the meta message behind this movie, but there really isn't one. This movie is about the potential horror of AI and deep fake technology, which was revealed in a deleted scene where "Lola" discovers the server center which is hosting the AI platform that is copying the girls.
In my opinion, this was a pivotal scene to the movie, but the director seemed to want to leave the ending ambiguous. It worked. The ending really didn't make much sense. Her battle with the replica followed by her making a new account and broadcasting with a new identify almost seemed like they were just desperately trying to leave room for a sequel rather than providing this film with a decent conclusion.
Overall this movie fostered a very creepy atmosphere born out of what could have been a seriously good Black Mirror episode, but unfortunately, the director's decision to leave the audience in the dark wasted it's capacity for striking real fear into the viewers regarding the totally conceivable prospect of AI's stealing, and profiting, off our identities.
The Rental (2020)
So many people seem mad it doesn't have a typical hero vanquishing villain ending.
I watch a lot of horror movies. The best ones are those that leave you with a lingering feeling that...this could happen to me. The Rental achieves this as well as any horror flick I've ever seen.
Total spoilers incoming.
The villain is not the supposedly racist AirBNB manager as they original lead you to believe, nor his brother who owns the property. It's a previous renter who rents the AirBNB, sets up hidden cameras, duplicates the key, and returns to murder everyone later. It's a premise that feels totally plausible and will leave me checking for cameras in every AirBNB I rent from now on. If they used a fake name, prepaid credit card, etc, they would be especially hard to catch. Moving from location to location, especially if they're in different cities and/or states, would take the police awhile to connect them together if he's leaving a fair amount of time in between.
Stellar premise and great execution and earns a 9/10 for me. Some aspects of the plot were slightly contrived and predictable, which is what loses it a point. But it's still one of the best thriller/horror movies I've seen anytime recently.
Smile (2022)
A Very Creepy Twist on an Original Concept
This movie was strongly reminiscent of It Follows. The concept of a person being haunted by an evil entity that no one else can see but them, that can show up as people you know, people who have died. The fact it's passed on from person to person.
In contrast, Smile was much creepier. The entity is far more malevolent. It didn't just follow it's victims, it mercilessly tormented them, engaging in cruel trickery to invoke as much fear and anxiety as possible. The filmmakers did a spectacular job drawing you into the reality of the main character. You really feel her terror along with her.
There is also just something inherently creepy about people smiling at you in this overly psycho clown type way. Something I realized when watching another great horror film, Hereditary, which featured naked old people smiling at the main characters from dark closets and corners.
All in all, this is a very spooky movie and if you're into horror movies and being creeped out, I'd highly recommend it.
The Coven (2022)
Lazy filmmaking
Knew this was going to be bad as soon as they showed the painfully long silent car ride where they superimposed shots over the top of each other for no reason whatsoever. Reminded me of the unnecessarily long transition scenes in Birdemic that served no purpose whatsoever.
Gave it two stars for a good title cover.
Star Trek: Discovery: Kobayashi Maru (2021)
Is this supposed to be a comedy?
The opening scene to this episode was so bad I honestly thought that the writers had given up trying to make this a Sci-Fi drama and were just embracing the fact that this series resembles more of a satirical comedy. But no, they seem serious.
I almost barfed at Captain Burnham's "engage" phrase: "Let's Fly." But it fits perfectly with how unbearably cliche and corny the rest of the show is at this point.
If this survives this season, I'll be shocked. Jason Issacs and Michelle Yeoh's characters were the only real saving grace, and amazingly, the producers/writers exited both of them. It's almost like this is an experiment on Star Trek fans to see how much abuse they will endure.
Someone needs to create a compilation at the end of this show of all the scenes where the characters are all smiling at each other on the bridge. It will probably last six hours.
The Kindergarten Teacher (2018)
Gyllenhaal's portrayal of Lisa is far too real.
This is the type of movie that will have you screaming at the TV in a desperate attempt to understand the outlandish yet sympathetic choices of the main character.
Gyllenhaal's performance is absolutely breathtaking. The character Lisa is so relatable, and yet also so disconnected from reality. This paradox results in a truly remarkable film that draws you in and makes you question the philosophy of right and wrong, right until the bitter ending.
Solis (2018)
Pretty solid film with a hilarious eyebrow raising ending.
This film is basically an exploration into the existential horror of a slow, painful death alone in space. The main character makes every effort to ensure he survives long enough to be saved, risks his life multiple times doing so, and then at the end, when the rescue is right there, is basically like: "Oh nevermind, just help me make a quick phone call home and then I guess I'll just die." Right before that happens, he also decides to stare directly into the sun and blind himself for seemingly no reason.
Overall this had good acting, decent writing. But endings are difficult. Often writers and directors don't want to give viewers the fairy tale happy ending they're expecting, but when that's what you're building toward, and you're right there, and you decide to just illogically bail on that premise at the last second, that actually feels less creative and unoriginal than going with what the audience clearly wants.
99 Homes (2014)
America Does Not Bail Out The Losers.
America was built by bailing out winners. By rigging a nation, of the winners, for the winners, by the winners.
Most of us have been sold the dream that owning your own home is the paradise we all strive for. Mortgages from banks make this available to middle class citizens. Yet when unemployment rises and those citizens can't pay that mortgage, well, that's where Rick Carver, portrayed by Michael Shannon, comes in.
This movie is a dark depiction of the ugly side of real estate. Average people losing their homes, their safety, their lives. Leaving with nothing to show for it. Often because they were convinced to borrow more than they could afford. Other times simply due to misfortune. Does Rick Carver care? Oh no. Carver is an absolute savage. Cold and calloused. Unforgiving in his pursuit of wealth. Letting no sob story stand in his way. Dennis Nash (Garfield) is snagged up into Carver's web of deceit, fraud, and lies, in his own pursuit to regain what he lost.
This movie examines how easy it is for greed to consume even the best of us. Amazing film with stellar performances by Shannon and Garfield.
Post Impact (2004)
Move over Birdemic.
There's a new competitor in town, and it's name is Post Impact.
Tragically bad writing, acting, directing, special effects.
If you have a night where you want to watch a comedy and you can't find anything, this will do.
I would say my favorite bit was when the military plane was falling apart, about to crash, and all the military personnel passengers reacted by getting up from their seats and forming a impromptu mosh pit in the middle of the aircraft. Because that's what you do when a plane is experiencing extreme turbulence or crashing, you get up from your seat and run around the plane aimlessly.
Shadow in the Cloud (2020)
Why isn't this categorized as a comedy?
This movie is absolutely hilarious.
It starts out pretty strong as a thriller. Good war style feel and intense action to start with. The gremlin is a great CGI design, basically a giant bat creature. Very menacing.
The movie takes a sharp turn south when you find out the secret "package" that Garrett (Moretz) is carrying turns out to be her infant child which she is apparently trying to smuggle out of the country. Oh and the baby's father is on board the flight, although at first he doesn't even realize he has a baby. The scene as she admits this all over the radio, in flight, in the middle of battle, is one of those classic Hollywood blunders where death and destruction hit the pause button so the characters can slowly develop the plot into something far less interesting than what the viewer was expecting.
This movie turns into a hysterical comedy after that. With amazing gags like Garrett climbing outside the plane while in flight and scaling the bottom of the aircraft to save her baby from falling. Culminating with her losing her grip, falling from the airplane about 100 feet, directly onto a Japanese Zero that is flying by, which explodes, AND BLOWS HER BACK INTO THE B-17, UNHURT. LMAO. I laughed so hard I think I pulled a muscle.
I won't spoil any more of it, but I would definitely recommend giving this a watch, although go into it knowing that it's designed to insult your intelligence if you're not planning on laughing.
The Strain (2014)
Would have been better if they had completely removed Max Charles
I'm a big fan of these types of shows, fantasy turned sci-fi, and they did a pretty good job with this one. The first episode is gripping, the storyline unfolds after that in a fairly engrossing manner.
This show is unfortunately plagued by Max Charles. The writing for his character and his performance are both appallingly awful. He could have and should have been completely left off the show, and it would have been a monumental improvement. The moment when he triggers a nuclear detonation because he's mad at his dad for killing his vampire mommy (in complete self defense) was the climax of the absurdity of his character's arc and really put a stain on an otherwise good series that can never be wiped off.
Midsommar (2019)
Dear Ari Aster: You Got Issues Man. Seek Help.
I don't know where to start. Florence Pugh's performance at times made me feel as if 10,000 ants were having an ant independence day parade over my entire body.
The horrifying opening sequence, which features Dani (Florence Pugh) being talked down by her boyfriend as a hopeless worry bug, constantly concerned about her biopolar sister who sent her a very ominous e-mail and then stopped responding. Right before the reveal that her sister not only took her own life, but killed their parents as well. This is just the first five minutes. After that, it starts to get really dark.
This movie made me so uncomfortable so many times. At one point I started to notice some discomfort in my face and realized I hadn't blinked in at least five minutes. My eyes stuck wide open, glued to the humanistic horror unfolding onscreen.
All I really want to say is that Ari Aster belongs in a psych ward. He should still be allowed to make movies. And I will watch all of them. I just don't want the guy who wrote and directed this movie to be able to roam free in society. It's just not a good idea.
Us (2019)
It's going to be hard to live up to Get Out.
Very cool and creepy concept. For the most part, great acting and writing, with just the right amount of comic relief.
Unfortunately, Us suffers from a similar trap that many horror movies fall into. In order to keep the scares coming, they choose to make the main characters act like complete morons. I was face palming throughout a good portion of the last 50% of this film.
"Please don't leave the safety of the car to check and make sure the villain is dead."
"Please don't wade into the blatantly obvious trap being set for you."
Oh no, they're going to do all of that. Gotta say, great twist at the end, and because most people seem far less bothered by the irrational behavior than me, I don't expect too many people to share my opinion.
I will also concede that I felt Get Out was a masterpiece, so my expectations for Us were probably unreasonable. But what can I say, if Peele is going to set the bar so high in his first film, that is just going to be the reality.
If you enjoy horror movies, definitely check it out. Just expect to be a little disappointed with the intelligence of the characters in my opinion.
Distorted (2018)
Giving it a 5/10 for the concept.
This movie is based off a great concept. People spend so much time with their faces in their devices nowadays, and with the staggering advancements in behavioral sciences, it does not seem like a stretch at all that someone, corporations, government, hackers, etc, would be able to inject powerful subliminal messages into our devices that in turn, warp and "distort" our thinking and behavior.
That concept is really all this movie stands on though. Otherwise, it is a crippled mess. It's a real shame when someone without the talent and vision to execute a concept like this takes it home. The good news is, a great filmmaker can now steal this concept and create a real blockbuster for it.
Killing Eve (2018)
Masterful writing, acting and directing.
Jodie Comer was born to play Villinelle. I honestly don't know if this is her breakout role, or simply a once in a lifetime perfect casting job, but Villinelle is one of the most intriguing, terrifying, and savage characters I have ever seen. Jodie Comer is so skilled at playing a belligerent sociopath, it actually makes me question her own sanity.
The First Purge (2018)
Cool concept. Bad writing.
I hate movies like this where they cannot think of any way to draw out the movie's conflict other than making most of the characters out to be complete idiots.
"Isaiah" has two easy chances to kill the early antagonist, "Skeletor", but he fails to both times, even when "Skeletor" is in the process of slitting his sister's throat. Then they clearly deleted a scene later that resolved Skeletor's story. Then Isaiah develops a seriously sadistic killer instinct all of a sudden 3/4 of the way through the movie after the "Skeletor" character is simply forgotten on the cutting room floor. They also deleted the scene where he got killed, but decided to include the one that showed him randomly dead on the floor at the end. Nice work team.
A few pros. I like the concept of showing how the idea of the purge took place at first as a social experiment on an island where people were lured by money to participate.
I like the concept that the government had a backup plan if the purge did not go the way they wanted. And that they used the tracking devices they had paid people to put on to hunt down the most desperate of the population, who were most likely to accept the money for such a thing. That's some really, evil, sinister stuff. Usually my kind of movie.
Engage sarcasm. I love it when they include a character who is a gang banger with a high IQ and a conscience. Who is willing to risk everything for the lives of strangers. I also like movies where the Pope is a mob boss.
I also love in shootout situations when one side that is being seiged all start yelling "I'm out of ammo!!!" loud enough for the enemy to hear.
Disengage sarcasm.
These movies were honestly never really that great. But the concept nearly stood on it's own. This one is a huge fail. Mostly on the writers part. I don't even really care about the fact that it is essentially blacks vs whites. I'm fine with that. What annoys me is how stupid everyone seems to be except the black gang boss who is laughably named "Dmitri".
The only reason I gave this three stars is because, as an amateur filmmaker, I have to appreciate the way some of the fight scenes were shot. The cinematography is actually pretty legit.
If you watch this, prepare to have your intelligence insulted. If you can accept that the writers think you are a complete idiot, you might actually get some modicum of enjoyment out of this movie.
13 Reasons Why (2017)
Suicide Revenge Porn.
Some aspects of this show do an amazing job capturing the agonizing emotional misery that some kids experience in the often toxic environment of High School. But mostly, it's about a girl who gets revenge on her mean classmates by committing suicide and then leaving a bunch of really smug tapes behind for them to listen to.
In order to stretch the season out for 13 episodes, the main character, Clay, listens to the tapes at an excruciatingly slow rate. Hannah also has a weird enforcer dude that looks like AC Slater had a baby with Bruno Mars going around and making sure the tapes are heard by everyone.
I only made it through about five episodes, and only watched that many because I heard someone talking about how it should be banned, which piqued my interest. However listening to Hannah's snooty guilt trips was too cringey for me.
I also have to grudgingly agree that this show seems to glorify suicide, especially from a teenagers perspective, as Hannah not only becomes super popular post-suicide, but totally gets back at everybody who wronged her with her tapes.
This show, or book rather, seems like it was written by someone who was bullied in HS, and this plot was a deep held revenge fantasy. Please kids, if you are getting bullied, punch your bully in the face.
Excess Flesh (2015)
Looks like 90% of people missed the point of this one. (Spoiler Alert)
Most reviewers have gotten it right as far as the acting and style on this movie, so I won't add much as far as that goes.
If you watch this one more than once, it should be obvious that the story is not about two roommates, but one woman struggling with body dysmorphia.
The character's name is Jill, but she looks like Jennifer. The Jennifer personality may have been her original personality, or it may have been created as a defense mechanism to hide all the feelings of confidence and self worth, while loading up the other personality with guilt, regret, and self loathing. This was created during or after her marriage to an emotionally abusive partner who, as it is depicted in the extremely twisted and weird reality sex show sequence, would constantly tell her how disgusting and unattractive she was. This created Jill. The personality that binge eats.
This is made clear through several key scenes. The two scenes where Jill and Jennifer are both in the presence of someone else (waking up with Rob, and on the curb with the police), Jennifer goes unnoticed and does not speak or even move. She is not acknowledged by anyone but Jill.
Then, in the scene where Jill opens her front door and the woman snaps cell phone photos of her, the photos are shown later to actually be photos of Jennifer. Despite that the woman's name is actually Jill, Jill is the one who does not exist in physical form. The appearance of Jill is a mental manifestation of her body dysmorphia.
Then finally in the last scene, when Jill injects the talent agent with that nasty Draino stuff she concocted, she leans over, and once again, you can see in the reflection that it's Jennifer.
The Originals (2013)
Lol. These shows insult my intelligence.
An extremely attractive female I dated a few years ago got me watching Vampire Diaries. She had an OMG body and I thought watching it might get me laid. I got laid, but I'm honestly not sure if watching this show helped or hurt me because on some level I know she thought I was a lil B for sitting there and watching it with her.
Being a sucker for the genres of paranormal, supernatural, science fiction, etc, I continued watching it. and by the grace of God, it finally came to an end. I watched this spin off, "The Originals" out of curiosity and made it through 4-5 episodes.
I don't feel like this is a preference thing. It's just common sense. When you try and show me an immortal vampire who has been alive for thousands of years and can compel humans to do anything she wants, on her hands and knees with rubber gloves scrubbing some blood spots out of the rug, I can conclude nothing except that the writers are trying to prank me.
They are testing to see if I am stupid enough to believe that someone who drinks blood for nourishment, has superhuman powers, including the ability to completely control humans, and is totally and completely immortal, would even think to scrub her own rug, let alone have made the stop at Safeway to pick up the rubber gloves, sponges, and cleaning products needed for it...
Just want the writers to know, you got me. Hope the 3-4 hours of my life was worth it. But that is all you are getting.