Kalamoren Reviews

After the Flood (2024– )

Clickbait soap

[2/10 · 12 January 2024]

"From The Producers of Happy Valley"

This above is the only reason I pressed 'play' and I've regretted it pretty much instantly. Happy Valley was gritty, captivating well executed and more. After The Flood feels more like a typical melodramatic soap.

I'll be honest, I stopped watching right at the beginning, during the Moses scene (you'll know which one I mean) but it's all I could endure...

Extremely poor, not sure exactly who is involved from Happy Valley but it's definitely not on the same level.

The flood theme was however a pretty good timing considering whats happening in the UK right now.

Berlin (2023– )

Everyone speaks Spanish in France

[4/10 · 6 January 2024]

After La Casa De Papel, La Casa Del Soap! (Telenovela)

Berlin is very high on drama and love, love, love, love, love, it's all about love. The heist is secondary. Actually no... tertiary. As soon as a love romance ends another starts immediately. Literally all the characters have some romantic/relationship drama going on and on and on.

And like I've mentioned in my headline, literally everyone they meet in France speaks Spanish! And not just a little, fully fluent!

Maybe if they were in south of France it would be a little easier to swallow, but in Paris?!

Disappointing and unnecessary sequel (sorry prequel).

Independence Day: Resurgence (2016)

Let's turn and burn

[3/10 · 28 May 2023]

Roland Emmerich is back at the helm -for better or for worse- but I personally have always enjoyed the original Independence Day, which has often been a bit of a guilty pleasure flick through the years.

I think Jeff Goldblum speaks for all of us when he asked Charlotte Gainsbourg: "What are you doing here?" Although I'll admit it's insane how much of the original cast is back which ironically makes Will Smith's half arsed death even more painful. His "son" may as well not be here and the rubbish addition of Liam Hemsworth -ugh... Travis Tope alone would have been much better.

Independence Day Resurgence's CGi & Special effects are a huge improvement but the whole film is very... blue? Like seriously why is everything blue, this isn't Avatar. Resurgence is once more very American -shoot first, ask question later- but the humour is very bad this time around: "Pee your pants?" "Yeah!" "Yeah, me too" -looks like Bill Pullman wasn't the only one that needed his meds- None of the stakes feel like they matter and the emotional impact is nonexistent.

E.g. The arrival of the alien ship was so powerful in the first film, this time around it's scaled up ludicrously but to no avail.

"The ship will touch down over the Atlantic." "Which part?" "All of it Ma'am."

Basically everything that worked in the first film-the invasion, the speech, the hostage tentacle communication grip-doesn't here.

I'll always be thankful for Roland Emmerich's work because he always pushes the scale of mass destruction events and without his Stargate film there might have never been Stargate SG-1, Atlantis and Universe adaptations which I'm a huge fan of but honestly his only other films I liked are: -Independence Day -Godzilla -The Patriot

I originally thought people were reviewing this one too harshly just as I feel they did with its predecessor but unfortunately not.

Big Bet (2022–2023)

Incredible series

[10/10 · 26 March 2023]

Just finished Kajino (aka Big Bet), the cast and locations are amazing. Same goes for the production, attention to details and continuity. Truly a modern masterpiece. As usual Choi Min-sik is amazing but many other lead actors shine here. The transition between countries and languages is flawless. The majority is actually probably in English with then a lot of Korean and a little Filipino.

The ending might not satisfy every viewers but for me it was perfect otherwise I would have just ended up wanting more and more series.

Can't recommend this enough. I ended bingeing both series after the first episode.

Top Gun: Maverick (2022)

Top Gun meets Mission Impossible meets Star Wars

[9/10 · 24 August 2022]

Top Gun Maverick is a wash rinse repeat formula right from the opening title, so much in fact that I had to double check I was watching the right film and not the first one again.

The yet another love story was less intrusive and more appreciable, especially with the sublime Jennifer Connelly and while Val Kilmer is back don't hold your breath.

Tom Cruise is off to Top Gun again, but to teach recruits a Mission Impossible previously seen in Star Wars IV: A New Hope where the Rebels had to follow a perilous path in their one shot to blow up the Death Star.

I'll spare the details but eventually they get a mission accomplished. And while I was satisfied with this sequel and denouement, I wanted more before the credits starts to roll, and oh boy did I get more. And after I could I could take no more. I still GOT MORE. I was in awe, at the edge of my seat, speechless and mindblowned.

The IMAX 4k + insane manoeuvres, flights and stunts were incredible. That one scene where one enemy pilot avoid a missile by doing a spiralling-dead-butterfly-I-don't-know-what manoeuvre will stay with me for a long time and I almost started rooting for him afterwards.

Yes Top Gun Maverick is a little on the nose and predictable but I had a blast watching it. I was originally gonna rate it a 8 but I'm bumping it to 9 out of 10.

Decision to Leave (2022)

Don't kick the turtles!

[8/10 · 15 August 2022]

I love Park Chan-wook and definitely feel like I've waited way too long for Decision to Leave to release. Unfortunately the version I had was littered with bad subtitles which affected my experience quite a fair bit.

Decision to Leave has some very strong Hitchcockian vibes and although director Park strayed somewhat from his typical vengeance plots on this one, his style and vision are unmistakable. Romance has never been my favourite part in films and despite always being a major element in most of his work: The Handmaiden, Thirst, Oldboy, I'm a Cyborg, etc. I'm always deeply involved emotionally with his characters and their struggles.

You know Park Chan-wook did it again when you finish the film and go: "Wow I need to watch that again!"

Morbius (2022)

Michael Morbius more like Michael Jackson, am I right?

[5/10 · 13 August 2022]

I have stopped watching MCU "movies" a while ago because every time I do, I regret it.

While I wasn't familiar with the comics or the character, (hero?) Morbius is very predictable, they even did the Verbal's limp from The Usual Suspects.

Morbius still has some corny MCU jokes but overall is an improvement as a movie although ultimately pointless with not much to tell. MCU probably needed to introduce his character so he can go join their boys band in upcoming movies. Which I won't be watching.

But at least it was nice to see Jared Leto performing well again after the few miscast he had lately, meanwhile the other Jared (Harris) does great as usual but why would you cast Matt Smith and Tyrese Gibson in this or in anything for that matter?

The Sandman (2022– )

Is this for children?

[4/10 · 6 August 2022]

I'm not familiar with the comics but I was expecting something more dark and violent, not another teen drama. It's all just a bit too safe in my opinion.

Gogglebox (2013– )

Great to keep updated

[10/10 · 26 April 2019]

I don't live in the UK anymore and this show is perfect for catching up on politics, TV shows, game shows, reality shows and anything going on in the UK. The first seasons were finding themselves but now they settled in I really find it funny and entertaining.

I've discovered many great series just by watching Gogglebox