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Reviews
Merlin (2008)
Just Awful
Bad writing, worse acting.. The Arthurian legend written for 12 year olds with smart phones. Just a complete train wreck. If you like good fantasy you'll be disappointed. If you like shlock TV written for the lowest common denominator then this is for you. Can you have historical inaccuracies in fantasy? If so then this show should win the prize. 20th century shoes, modern lab equipment, lots of paper, silk dresses, sandwiches.. the list goes on. For some reason this silly review thing requires me to write eighty nine more characters. There isn't much left to say except that every minute I spent watching this tripe were minutes I'll never get back.
The Friends of Eddie Coyle (1973)
I honestly don't know why this gets such high ratings
Disjointed. Confusing. Dispassionate. Just a few words that spring to mind when reviewing this. Mitchum's performance is almost pushed into the background. There doesn't seem to be a real theme in this entire picture. Is there a story? Yes but it's unnecessarily convoluted. Not really many passionate characters and frankly it seems like a lot of the actors just showed up for the paycheck. The primary reason I enjoyed this was strictly for the nostalgia; realistic depictions of what the world looked like back then. Other than that I can't really rate this as high as others. It just did not grab me on any level.
Shout at the Devil (1976)
A Truly Dreadful Film
A tedious two-hour+ drag of a cliché 1970's historical action film. If you're not bothered by plot holes, cartoonishly absurd alcoholism as a running gag, racial stereotypes, bad acting, longwinded scenes that seem to serve no purpose and two dimensional characters then this film might be for you.
This film has all the hallmarks of the kind of movie actors make when they desperately have to pay bills and it would probably be a favor to the memories of both Lee Marvin and Roger Moore if every copy of this film would suddenly vanish.
Poldark: Episode #5.1 (2019)
Well.. they finally ruined it
2019 social justice wokeness meets 1800. Look no further for how to kill a historical series.
Naked in New York (1993)
Predictable Borefest
The best part of this snoozefest was seeing the boom mic in a scene or two. I think the only people that like this are people that fantasize that they're writers and for some reason project themselves into this trivial life. It's really too boring to recommend as even a movie "so bad it's good". Sadly.. it's not even that bad. It's even mediocre in its badness.
Babylon Berlin (2017)
Good Scenery, Music scenes are ridiculous
Nice period piece but anyone that has read the books has to be perplexed and a little incensed that Charlotte Ritter has been turned into a proletarian small time hooker by the scriptwriters. Volker Bruch and Peter Kurth are outstanding. The musical scenes in the first season are ludicrous. Slightly reminscent of the bad musical choices in the recent Great Gatsby it smacks of trying to place modern rhythm into the 1920s to lure a generation of viewers with zero understanding of history. It almost works but the laughably bad scene with the entire club dancing a choreographed piece was simply ludicrous. There are any number of bad music fallacies and errors. Music styles from the 1950s and 60s popping up in clubs in Berlin in the 1920s. Songs from the 1930s being played in 1929. Whoever was in charge of the music failed miserably. Also.. you don't have to be a gun expert to recognize modern handguns. For a show that has been so painstakingly put together in other respects stuff like this is inexcusable.
Cop Rock (1990)
How did this idea ever get past being laughed out of the idea room?
This is the Plan 9 from Outer Space of police shows. Concieved by "Styoopid minds!" Just absolutely awful but do yourself a favor and get loaded with some friends and try to watch this.
The Dresden Files (2007)
Meh
Big fan of the books and while not expecting a TV show to meet those expectations I have to say I'm underwhelmed. Poor adaptation which is probably primarily a result of a (very) limited special effects budget. Note to TV producers: If you're trying to make a TV series based on the supernatural, have a proper SFX budget. Other irritations are skipping over too many critical Dresden Files Universe points. (no spoilers here). As a result, the show runs more like a run of the mill detective series than anything else. And it's also primarily a Canadian production which means it looks like a Canadian production. (Love ya Canada but not everything has to look like an old USA Network show.) 5/ 10 Stars. If you're wondering why it got cancelled after one season.. don't. Buy the books.
Shanghai (1935)
Rather dull and disjointed
A rather disjointed, dull film that Charles Boyer fans may like simply because it's another film with Charles Boyer. Nothing really remarkable in it other than an odd appearance of Warner Oland playing not Charlie Chan but a Chinese diplomat and Keye Luke playing his son (again). Scenes skip from the main characters poverty, wealth, poverty with no visible explanation, other than a succinct, "Well, I've lost everything."
I suppose the point of the film was a lame attempt at criticizing prejudice in a film complete with Libby Taylor as "Corona" the stereotypical black maid complete with campy attitude and down-home witticisms but who, unlike virtually anyone else in the picture, seems to speak Chinese. Warner Oland's appearance makes the ostensible point of the film even more comical.