Change Your Image
mdtyner
Reviews
Skyfall (2012)
Ridiculous story
I get it. Movies are supposed to suspend reality in order to entertain us. But there are so many "suspended" moments in this story, it was insulting to my Intelligence. A computer can open sewer grates? Cyanide poison is bad for your teeth? You can kill someone under water by strangulation? If you want to kill an old woman, bomb her office, invade parliment, crash the subway, invent an alien internet, hire an army, buy a island.... Please do better.
The Quick and the Dead (1995)
Quick, turn the channel
Simple plot, predictable, waste of good acting talent. The actors were caricatures of every bad western you have seen. Exaggerated bad guys, sloppy and ill mannered. The movie is violent in its many high noon gun fights, but laughable in its effects of what bullet holes can really do. Stone was hot, but the rest were cold.
The Third Man (1949)
I hate zither music!
I had higher expectations for this film. It was highly rated, had a star cast, and an intreaging plot line. And the last third of the movie delivered.
But the start of the movie was slow and disjointed. Cotton's character was forced, unnatural and contrived. And the female lead was too uninvolved and impossible for the story. She was too caring, then she cared nothing at all, then too caring again. She never had my sympathy. And Cotton came off as a fool.
I'm not sure why many characters existed. The witnesses to the death of Lemon were undeveloped and creepy. The killing of the old man was unwarranted. The accusation by the little boy was phony and unnecessary.
It was only after Wells' character shows up at the end of the film that the movie comes together. He gives the film some meaning and intellect and raises up the other characters. The conflict finally makes sense, and the action is now finally developed. It's like a different writer and director took over.
So the film was salvaged at the end. But the first part was rough. And the damned soundtrack of that awful zither made the film painful to sit through!
The Last Man (2019)
Wrong, wrong, wrong
This film start out wrong, was bad in the middle, and ended badly. I fast forwarded through the full parts and I never do that. It cut about an hour out of the movie. Really, don't waste your time.
The Great War (2019)
From filmmakers who have never seen a war movie.
I love a good war movie, but this is an insult to any soldier who had ever served. Silly, predictable, clownish, no sense of military realism. A shame.
Ad Astra (2019)
Slow, boring.
Could not stay awake during the movie. Some scenes were just silly. Plot was too simple to make sense. The physics were insulting. Sorry, a bad film.
Project Ithaca (2019)
Terrible.
The very moment I saw the general in his uniform with three stars on the shoulders and sergeant stripes on the arm, I knew this movie was trouble. Maybe the plot came from a cheap comic or paperback. The action was so slow, if you can imagine the actors strapped into chairs, sitting in a circle for 3\4 the movie. And the dialogue seems it was hammered from technical jargon and contorted tech gibberish from every bad sf movie you've ever seen. Total waste of time and money.
Yesterday (2019)
Great movie. Not a love story.
Great story about the music. But the unreal relationship between Ellie and Jack was unbelievable. Ellie loved Jack from the beginning, and it was obvious to anyone but Jack. Add to that she is beautiful. That Jack ignored her is a poor way to write in drama into the film. Either make Ellie more unappealing (not just looks) or have Jack appreciate her earlier like any healthy hetro man would.
The Lovely Bones (2009)
A terrible ending
When I devote a couple hours to a movie, especially one where a child has been killed and the killer is on the loose, I expect a satisfying resolution at the end. The contrived ending, where the boy kisses the transformed dead girl, was absurd. The killers death was equally contrived, falling from a parking lot was so impractical, giving him a quick death that was too generous. Then the dead girls body, being tossed away like trash, was disrespectful to the dead. And finally, the family was given no closure, no way to finally put closure to their grief. A terrible ending to a movie plot that had promise.
Welcome to Marwen (2018)
Not for the shallow teen
A special movie. Must have a little empathy for vulnerable people to really get this movie. If you can't think creatively, spend your cash on something more simple.