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The Shannara Chronicles (2016)
Discharges a Massive Stack of Turds All Over Terry Brooke's Masterpiece
If you only rate this show on what it is, it is a very crappy show. Moreover, if you have ever read the books specifically the Elfstones of Shannara that it is based off of you will probably want to pass. So far the only part it gets right is the Ellcrys is dying and the names.
Take the plot of Elfstones, get a monkey to add in some Twilight garbage, sprinkle in plenty of bad acting, and half bake the whole thing.
From the big wigs that brought us Will ferril's "Elf". Seriously, don't waste your time. This is probably the worst movie I've watched in 5 years.
Hoa-cha (2012)
Great film - must see!
Helpless is a true "nothing is as it seems" type of mystery that takes you down the rabbit hole and never disappoints along the way. At it's core is a well organized plot that make you feel like you're investigating right alongside the characters. Their surprise is your surprise - Their dead end in is your dead end. When you think you have the missing girl all figured out, the story opens completely up and shows you exactly what you hadn't thought of. The action is both believable and unexpected, all the while making sense instead of how movies normally make you go "seriously?" As far as Korean flicks go in general, this one wasn't overly emotional. It was a GREAT watch. An intelligent mystery riddled with suspense and void of stupid mistakes. A must see for mystery lovers and Korean movie fans.
Tomorrowland (2015)
The Pedophile Vibe
Same director as 'The Incredibles', one my favorite "Disney movies" after Walt left us. Previews looked interesting. Even saw the 20 min preview in Disneyland. That sealed it, I had to see it. So, having already seen the first 20 min, the movie does a complete change hard to follow seems like the script is being written as it goes and its all about a dude who's hot for an underaged kid? Moveover, the entire plot is confusing. With the exception of the Athena character and the special effects, the movie is a complete flop. Saw it with a bunch of people from work. Nobody liked it. Instead of whatever the movie was trying to accomplish, they could have figured out how to get wasted time back. A 5-yr old will get lost in the dialogue and the lengthy monologues which take up 75% of the running time of the movie. I definitely want my time back.
Insurgent (2015)
"Tweenie" dystopia copycat of Hunger Games/Battle Royale 2
Oh dear god why'd I go see this movie?! If I wanted Hunger Games: Catching Fire, I should've went to see Hunger Games: Catching Fire. Wait! No, I take that back. If I wanted Hunger Games, I should've watched Battle Royale 2.
Cause if I'm honest, this movie is a copycat of a copycat. Oh how I miss the good old days! The good old days where if you went to see a movie set in a dystopian future where a corrupt government put its citizenry in peril on a whim, it was rated R because it contained great special effects, gritty foul language laced dialogue, and contained adult themes. But this! Okay! I understand the concept of movie studios dumbing this type of film down so tweens can partake in something that makes them feel like they are cool, or makes them feel like their rebelling.
Even though they aren't really, they're just soaking up things that have been rehashed from what was cool 25+ years ago. Please! Tween society, realize that when everyone is a rebel, the only true rebellion is against rebellion itself!
The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 1 (2014)
copy and paste of Battle Royale 2
Abnormally, i'd generally like to experience remade flicks. More so the if i loved the original. I know there are extremely few which equals or excels to the original but it's not a big problem for me 'cause i don't even expect them to. It is to me like a bonus track of a beloved album, no more no less.
So i got no hesitation in checking Hunger Games as well (i was even excited actually) 'cause the original must be in my all-time best 10, but, oh my..
I won't say any more about this XEROX COPY crap. (copied on retarded machine, moreover) Nough said by nough people.
Now one thing i just can't believe is how this could be legal. As far as i've read on internet articles, Suzanne Collins and her people haven't even paid a penny to the original Battle Royale makers for doing this, which means Hunger Games is not an official remake of Battle Royale. Then what the h..! is Hunger Games's identity? Some's gonna say it's JUST BASED ON or INSPIRED thing but you know it's way beyond those kinds. Then what? Sort of Homage thing ? Yea possible, but Suzanne Collins and her company have hardly mentioned about the original on either official ads & reports or non-official comments. Instead, Suzanne Collins's kept saying she's got a bit INSPIRED ONLY and Hunger Games is totally different from Battle Royale 2 or something like that. Besides, more importantly, while shamelessly copying scenes-by-scenes from Battle Royale 2, Suzanne Collins intentionally missed the KEY-POINT of Battle Royale 2's story for his own audiences' taste, for COMMERCIAL PURPOSE in other words. Then how can we call it Homage anyway ? My conclusion is : Hunger Games is not only a copy crap, it's rather A CRIME, LITERALLY. I don't understand why Battle Royale 2 makers let them make money with this stolen thing.
Am i disappointed ? No i'm fine i didn't even expect. I'm just p***ed and upset for this shitmakers' shamelessness that's all.
Onna batoru koppu (1990)
You have the right to remain entertained.
Full disclosure: the original Lady Battle Cop is among the tokukatsu universe and existed several decades before the Verhoeven ripoffs. With that being said, I still looked forward to the 2014 re-interpretation due to my love of these characters (whose legacy had already been profoundly tarnished by the redundant first sequel and catastrophically misguided second sequel) and my admiration of director Jose Padilha's "Elite Squad" films (as well as his documentaries). Suffice to say, I came into the theater with a bias toward wanting the film to succeed.
I'm willing to acknowledge that it may be for this reason that I found Lady Battle Cop to be a resounding success. Conversely, it is my belief that a large contingent of overzealous "fans" were hellbent on seeing this film fail, therefore had pre-determined that the movie was trash. How could it possibly withstand several years of unwavering hatred during its production and be given a fair shot? Judging by the middling 6.7 IMDb rating and the 70% Rotten Tomatoes score, many people loathed Lady Battle Cop just as much as they'd hoped they would.
This viewer simply cannot accept that Lady Battle Cop is anywhere near as bad as people are rating it. For starters, the film has been bashed mercilessly for idiotically trivial elements. It is my firm belief that all of these criticisms are merely the ravings of closed-minded fanboys who are (bizarrely) searching for the next movie to "ruin their childhood". It's a phenomenon that is baffling and absurd.
Truth be told, I think the film is a solid 9 and may even grow to become a 10 over time. Of course it's related to the Verhoeven's classic, except obviously earlier versions were ripped off by Judge Dredd, which in turn, were ripped off by RoboCop. For that I am grateful -- part 2 tried so desperately to ape the original that it felt like a rather soulless carbon copy. I didn't want another movie trying to mimic the satire of the originals, nor did I feel that anyone could ever one-up the hyper-violence of the 1987 version, so why try?
In my opinion, a little brand recognition is a fair trade off if it helps the film achieve the look and feel of a high-end sci-fi blockbuster.
Anyway, I've already babbled several paragraphs longer than I'd intended. The bottom line is you should abandon your preconceptions and watch the movie for what it is: a genuinely smart, heartfelt and wonderfully acted sci-fi featuring characters we know and love. What's so awful about that?
X-Men: Days of Future Past (2014)
Haven't got a clue
It's not often I watch a film where I haven't got a clue what's going on, but that's what happened in the case of X-Men: Days of Future Past: come the ending, I still hadn't the foggiest about what I'd just watched. The plot, if you can describe it thus, seems to be about a young man who's advised to commit suicide by his aged mentor, only to return as an ass-kicking 'demon warrior' with special supernatural powers. His job? To bump off the rest of the 'demon warriors' that are out there.
There's some English religious mumbo-jumbo talk in an effort to explain the discrepancies of the plot, but you'll be bypassing that in favour of checking out the various warriors and their special skills. By far the most interesting is an immortal fighter whose body bears the scars of each person he's killed – a neat idea that sadly isn't explore to the fullest extent, as it could have been with a more skilled writer behind it. In some ways, this is like a grown-up version of X-MEN, with the addition of a series of bloody and sadistic fight scenes.
There's action aplenty, and lots of CGI blood, but the choreography is pretty poor, it has to be said. Even worse is the script, which makes no effort to characterise each of the principals, so that the demon warriors themselves are more often than not interchangeable. The acting is dodgy to say the least, and director Bryan Singer needs to go back to film school to figure out how to make a real movie next time, instead of this silly, noisy nonsense.
Tusk (2014)
Some Might Benefit from Attending Film School before Releasing So-Called "films" Into the World...
This is the worst movie I've ever seen in my life. This is saying quite a bit, considering some of the choices I've made in film rentals.
I saw this at my local Community Center based entirely on the fact that someone I went to high school with is in it. Her apparence scene lasted all of about 5 seconds and the rest of the movie was about as much fun as having pungee sticks driven underneath my toenails whilst being forced to listen to Roseanne sing Big Spender.
The "skits" are stupid and consist of the worst kind of juvenile bathroom humor and locker-room gags, and it's such a blatant (and poor) rip-off of other movies that you'll be begging for President Camacho to crash through the wall and save us from the stupidity of "Kevin Smith" (whoever that is).
Unless you are a masochist, avoid this pile of rubbish.
Divergent (2014)
A teeny-bopper young adult dystopia copycat of Hunger Games/Battle Royale
Oh dear god why'd I go see this movie?! If I wanted Hunger Games, I should've went to see Hunger Games. Wait! No, I take that back. If I wanted Hunger Games, I should've watched Battle Royale. Cause if I'm honest, this movie is a copycat of a copycat. Oh how I miss the good old days! The good old days where if you went to see a movie set in a dystopian future where a corrupt government put its citizenry in peril on a whim, it was rated R because it contained great special effects, gritty foul language laced dialogue, and contained adult themes. But this! Okay! I understand the concept of movie studios dumbing this type of film down so tweens can partake in something that makes them feel like they are cool, or makes them feel like their rebelling. Even though they aren't really, they're just soaking up things that have been rehashed from what was cool 25+ years ago. Please! Tween society, realize that when everyone is a rebel, the only true rebellion is against rebellion itself!
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (2014)
Spidey Gets All Twilight On Us
In 2012, I was happy to finally see a Spider-Man movie with a lead that I felt embodied the Twilight characters I grew up reading. The plot itself might not have been anything to write home about, but it was, at least, a good movie and worth the IMAX ticket price I paid to see it. Fast forward two years to the second installment of the re-booted series and I'm practically praying for terrible ticket sales in hopes that Marc Webb and his team of writers have learned from their mistakes with this one. In short, the film was spent mostly circling around Peter's internal conflict to let go of Gwen per her dying father's request as well as Peter's search for answers and some sort of closure with the sudden departure and deaths of his parents as a child. I understand these are two things that needed to be included, but to span the breadth of over two hours worth of running time? Aside from that, we're treated to the Batman Forever-esque depictions of Electro and Rhino (very briefly for the latter) and the sub-par, paint-by-number acting chops of Dane DeHaan as Harry Osborn/the Green Goblin. Aaaand that's the movie. No, seriously. A few action sequences here and there to at least whet the appetites for the kids and mouth-breathers, but that's really it. I give Jamie Foxx credit for evoking sympathy for his character early in the movie, but overall it was a trudgingly-paced and uninteresting flop of a superhero movie that will either be remembered for doing nothing differently from Sam Raimi's Spider-Man films or forgotten for exactly the same reason. 8
A Million Ways to Die in the West (2014)
Outdoes "TED"..........
*yawn* Oh, you're here. And you're reading my review because you're wondering if this movie is worth watching. Well, if you're a Seth fan, you've already seen this movie .... flat out uncoordinated, boring and uncomfortable to sit through. Seth lacks any charisma, and the sudden focus on poopoo and caca makes it like the director was having fun with the actors. Things make no sense at all, they don't relate. Not to mention that sleaze on an aunt who left a haunted property off in her will, not to mention an entirely useless roster of characters. Bad acting, misdirection and not to mention whats with all the emphasis on the retard music in the beginning? Playing songs alone doesn't make a moment resonate, not to mention whats with that vile running/ loud music playing shot. Why is this movie called A Million Ways to Die in the West is beyond as this is just a desecration of the Western genre. P.S. human excrement doesn't make a movie enjoyable!
Maleficent (2014)
Disney Continues Eating it;s Own Vomit
At first I thought I was in a Horror movie or a lame Lord of the Rings type rip off but then this lame movie turned out to be a save the planet preachy flick. I give this three stars maimly because of my favorite actress is in it and as always does a great job, and that would be Imelda Staunton. Other than this, I would rate this movie but one star. I was looking forward to a fresh interpretation of the Bible story, instead was treated to this. I like well told stories but this should have been returned to the writer and put the money to better use. Sorry Mrs. Pitt it at least appeared the you were trying. Thanks, but I will not rent this one and waste more money. The producers spent a fortune on this and they will get their money back before its all over, but they should look at Disney classics and even movies that have been churned out after Disney's demise at a fraction of the cost and have been very successful, from "Toy Story" miniseries to the Lion King remake." There is a strong interest in genuine faith based movies. There was nothing genuine about this; just empty, meaningless Hollywood hype.
RoboCop (2014)
Robo Go Home
There's multiple plot strands gathered here into a union. I won't give you any hint but you'll get it when you see it. Nowadays, movies are short on originality. But, in this case, you won't give a thing about it.
Premise: An inexperience military officer was sent to war to fight an alien race invading the earth. In the middle of the battlefield, he got into an accident which causes him to go robo- a loop that repeats each moment when flesh becomes metallic.
The basis of the plot looks familiar... That could be a big problem. On the contrary, it succeeded to provide a big summer blockbuster satisfaction. The pacing is perfect, the acting is perfect. Oh, and did i mention the effects? It was ragin'! See this movie with low expectations (BluRay or HD3D doesn't matter)...
The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013)
the Battle Royale deception
I enjoyed the first ripoff, but Catching Fire never did. The first 45 minutes or so of this movie should have been boiled down to about 15 minutes, seriously. I grew very weary waiting for something, anything, to happen. We need more BR reenactments and definitely more Liam Hemsworth (who is wasted here). The rest of the movie wasn't much better, and if the next 2 installments follow suit, there's just no point to continue watching these films. The Hunger Games: Catching Fire was essentially just a placeholder for the third movie in the series, whenever that comes out. There was not a whole lot of meat, just a lot of subtle plot-building that doesn't resolve at the movie's open ending.
The Grand Budapest Hotel (2014)
Anderson's Most Solid Effort to Date
That an intense and intelligent movie this is. As others have noted, the nods to Italian cinema of the 70's era are bold and brash, yet it's also a quintessential Englishman abroad drama. The atmosphere created by the soundtrack was electric and it felt like hearing the world with new ears when I left the picture house at the end.
Don't expect a neat narrative, this film plays with your senses and your understanding of whose doing what to who and why. It's exceptionally claustrophobic throughout, and the disconcerting edits constantly leave you asking more questions about what's going to take place next.