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Reviews
Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse (2018)
Awful Pandering ... Terrible Movie, Period.
This poorly constructed CARTOON does nothing but reinforce the stereotype that comic books are a childish medium. It also helps exemplify a lot of what is wrong with modern Marvel itself.
Juvenile virtue signaling and forced unnecessary diversity is placed above what made the source material great in the first place. It tries to drive home both points to nauseating levels (literally because the choppy animation was designed to induce seizures and appeal to ADD sufferers) Between the "bip and baps" reminiscent of Adam West's Batman was a story that featured minority Spidey becoming near invincible because his father gives him a speech through a door. And don't forget infallible Mary Sue Spider-Gwen who is automatically better than all the boys because you know...vagina!!!
That aside, the story and characters themselves were apparently written by twelve year olds to appeal to twelve year olds. Spider-Pigs, anime robots and Alfred-like emotionless Aunt May surrounded by ruined classic Marvel villains (horrid distorted representations of Scorpion, Doc Ock, Kingpin, etc) Yes, they leaned on the misrepresentation from the Ultimate line but that garbage failed in print for a reason. Why puke that in to animation?
Overall, it's easy to see why older fans are rejecting this thing and why the box office was so light. Thank God for that anyway. Here's hoping this nonsense stays out of the MCU.
Aquaman (2018)
bland and uninspired and SOULLESS garbage
Bland and uninspired. I can't believe I'm using those two words to describe this thing. It's a CGI clusterflub, dumb-as-bricks film from start to finish type movie. Uninteresting, cliche villains, shoehorned attempts at sentimentality and one of the dumbest plot twists in the history of cinema make this a failed attempt by the WB and company to keep a failing universe afloat. There really is no saving anything from this universe save Wonder Woman at this juncture. What a terrible, terrible movie.
Dunkirk (2017)
emotionless, dull, tedious and frankly poor on every level
Not being a Christopher Nolan slappie, I was able to judge this effort all on its own merit. Watching what hits the screen plays out like a tedious and poorly constructed cable documentary. Honestly, there is literally not one ounce of character development or establishment at all. It's just a dry depiction of three round robin events that cascades from one harrowing circumstance to the next
. one revolving around a fighter pilot, another around a foot soldier and his French imposter hanger-on trying to survive and the other about an elder statesmen boat owner and his efforts to aid the cause. The only one that is even remotely interesting involves the boat owner, his son and poor lil' George. In fact, the only character name given as to remember it was poor sad lil' George. I didn't make it to the final credits but I wonder if the rest of the cast of characters was simply titled "nameless soldier"? Having no depth means limited emotional impact and that does a disservice to the real life heroes this movie tries to honor. What alleviates the shear dullness of what is depicted often comes in the form of a racing soundtrack. It's as if the frantic music is your cue on how to react because it's hard to tell by just watching the visuals. The movie itself is all one grim repetitive note. After a while, the grinding soundtrack does start to annoy and pushes towards headache inducing territory. Is that some kind of sloppy film making trick? Trick the audience in to feeling uneasy using other senses rather than simply writing an impactful story? It IS dull and it can hardly be called an actual movie given how it's structured but it's not offensively bad and does its job showing the grim events of Dunkirk.
The Hero (2017)
Sam Elliot and Laura Prepon are splendid but the movie is dull as dirt
Yes... SPOILERS.
While the performances were as strong as they seemed in the trailer, the overall film was not what I was expecting. Sam Elliot was very good as an aging Western film star facing his mortality and the results of his "lifetime of achievement." The surprise stand out was Laura Prepon. She added zest and a spark to what was a very dreary and often pointless story. Playing an out of the box and far younger love interest added a much needed and fascinating element.
This movie feels long and plods in a poorly paced manner. Given the performances, you could forgive the dullness had more scenes been profound and moving. Instead, we experience a LOT of wear and tear and a LOT of emotional numbness. The overall story arc really never concludes and much like real life there aren't easy answers. The third act simply ends on a profound poem about life.
King Arthur: Legend of the Sword (2017)
Not bad at all
This was way better than I expected it to be. Guy Ritchie may go off the rails in certain scenes in terms of over-visualization and music video level montages but he does craft cool tales. While not as good as his Sherlock Holmes re-imagining, his King Arthur is refreshing and interesting. I'm glad he fully embraced the wild mystical elements and had magic be front and center. The cast was a bit pedestrian as no one stood out (not even Arthur himself) but at least they didn't detract from the story. Overall, the entire movie is predictable but slick and intense enough to make me care just enough.
Independence Day: Resurgence (2016)
awful... far more mindless than it was fun.
The movie is billed and self promotes itself as mindless fun. I found it to be far more mindless than it was fun.
The main things lacking in this film that the original managed to deliver was a sense of true tension and characters that delivered charm and charisma. Resurgence has NONE of those qualities. The new cast (Will Smith's mini-me, Diet Thor and the fashion model) could ALL have been replaced with actual cardboard cut-outs and it wouldn't have changed the movie at all. They all came across as shallow and soulless. Jeff Goldblum delivered as usual and Brent Spiner was a true treat. Those two single-handedly engineered any saving graces this film does manage to deliver. The coincidences and the plot itself are so asinine that it's hard to enjoy as even pure popcorn fluff. The ending that sets up another sequel actually elicited groans from my audience.
Sad to say but this sequel twenty years in the making should have stayed in the developmental stage.