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Reviews
The Cube (2021)
Horrible Pace
The show looked interesting and it's a decent enough idea but the pacing is atrocious. I'm watching on MAX with no commercials and have the luxury of the 10 second skip and it's still a chore to get to actual game content.
The host is fine and the games are unique but the constant pauses and delays in an attempt to create tension are just overused. They could probably fit twice the amount of games in each episode if they paced it better.
I was trying to find a new show to watch but after two episodes I'm done. Next.
The rest of this review is just me trying to hit the ridiculous 600 character count.
Forged in Fire: Knife or Death (2018)
6.5 Rounded Up. Needs Refining.
This review is based of season 1. It was good enough that I will at least continue with season 2 and see if it has improved.
I really like the premise but I was shocked, and disappointed, that some of the contestants showed up with what were, essentially, wall hangers (knives/swords meant to hang on walls). Quite a few of the contestants forged their own weapons, which was more appealing to me. That's not to say everyone should have to forge their own but they should remove contestants that don't even know to bring properly sharpened and constructed blades to the competition from the candidate pool(Or do a pre-screen and replace them with an alternate if the weapon they bring is ornamental).
I think some of the obstacles need to be redone and the commentary tightened up but there definitely is some potential with this show.
Guillermo del Toro's Cabinet of Curiosities: Lot 36 (2022)
A Bit Ham-fisted But Watchable
It's a tale that's been told countless times: The cranky rude person gets their comeuppance and the person they scorned get's their revenge by not saving the person at the end. It's a good and timeless tale so it being told again isn't an issue here.
The production quality is really good and all in all it certainly didn't feel like a waste of time watching it.
Where it falls short the protagonist is overly bitter and ill-mannered and his reckless disregard a touch superfluous. Even at the prospect of a nice windfall the character can't even momentarily shed a lair of grump.... so what drives the character? The character seemingly exists to be a jerk. Completely unfettered by the corpse on the floor in front of him and the eerie ambiance around him he hastily trudges forward to almost begrudgingly grab the 4th book of the set.
The episode is set in the late 80's/early 90's but uses politically charged rhetoric from today's time. Yes, some of the same issues did exist at the time but they weren't at the forefront and the jargon was certainly different. We get it already, we're supposed to not like this guy.
The scorned woman apparently now lives at the storage facility because she's always there doing nothing but being there the whole time in order to be there when her opportunity for payback presents itself.
Allegiant (2016)
Doesn't Cut It
I thought the first two in the series were decent enough and entertaining but this movie in the series falls really flat.
The production value is good enough and the acting passes but story itself just isn't compelling and never draws me in. I never found myself anticipating the next scene and there was never any real sense of danger for the characters.
The scene I have a major issue with is when they're climbing the wall. So you're climbing the wall, with the goal of getting down the other side, and people are chasing and shooting at you... but you decide to just stop at the top and stand there in plain view? You're not going to hurry down the other side... or dip down while you formulate a plan so that the people shooting at you can't shoot you? Tori gets shot and killed in a scenario that makes absolutely no sense. If they shot her as she was trying to climb... or, for the dramatic death I think they were going for, shot her while she was just cresting the wall edge... that would fly.
It's that kind of lazy writing that makes films fail.
The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power: Adar (2022)
Good Until The Warg Sequence
The episode was good overall but I have to talk about that warg sequence.
First, terrible CGI on it... I mean there's stuff from 10 years ago that's better CGI.
The chain.... it's all over the place. It's taut, then there's 10 feet of slack that's somehow in front of the warg and then it disappears and is taut again, and back behind the warg, as the warg charges into the(apparently brittle roots of a tree that's still living) and crashes through the tree roots shattering them. Then there's this magical amount of slack on the chain again that can be wrapped around the roots several times. There's just so much wrong with the physics of that chain.
Finally, the last elf trying to escape gets shot in the chest, from behind(with a boomerang arrow?) ... I guess so he can turn around all "dramatically" to be shot in the chest again.
I really hope the action sequences are handled/presented better than this in the rest of the series.
It Had to Be You (2000)
Almost...
Rom-Coms aren't going to be profound, ground breaking, or really even largely original so what makes a Rom Com work is on screen chemistry, solid acting, and a timely and appropriate score.
This film is very wooden and really suffers from the lack of chemistry between actors. The dialogue feels contrived and almost a dialogue by numbers.
The premise was good and, individually, the actors are good, and even some personal favorites, but as a chorus this movie just doesn't deliver.
I wanted to like this movie but at times I wanted to walk away. I would recommend watching it just to knock it off your list but it's certainly not one I'll be going back to.
The Lord of the Rings: The Rings of Power (2022)
Two Episodes in and Genuinely Looking Forward to More.
We all know liberties were taken with this series so my review is not based on faithfulness to the source material.
A lot of the marketing for this show led people to fear it would be woke. I didn't see anything like that. I wasn't rolling my eyes or cringing at any virtue signalling.
The pace is a little rough in parts but since it's the beginning of the series I almost expect a little dawdling. There's a lot going on, things to be set up and introduced etc...
The characters and the story is engaging though, the cinematography was well done, and the score seemed to fit... so I'm honestly excited to see where this series goes.
Definitely give this a shot and decide for yourself.
Terror in the Woods: Hellhound (2017)
Best for a sleepover when kids want to get "scared"
It has ok production value as far as visuals and sounds etc...
Naive kids/teens that are just looking for scary stories to get into might enjoy this but as far as being taken seriously... not a chance.
When your main "evidence" is a photo that is displayed as "Reconstruction of Original Photo" You lose all credibility. Just show the actual photo... but of course you can't do that because the original is really just an uncompelling dark blurry mess of nothing... so you have to "reconstruct" it so as to include some fake monster outline.
The Voyeurs (2021)
I loved 80% of this movie... the first 80%.
This move started out fun and taboo... they're exploring/discovering a fetish. Then there's some interaction outside of the secret. Then the intervention but finally the obstacle was out of her way so her true flawed and depraved imperfect self could act on her real desire. The story here is really getting intriguing and it's different, as messed up as it is, but I'm all in at this point. Then the predictable happens, not in a bad way, just expected... but then it really sinks... next up cliche, not so subtle twist, cliche, cliche, followed by a try-hard wanna be profound, but completely failed, ending. This was a masterpiece for 75-80% of the movie and then it completely fell apart. This movie goes from a 9-10/10 to a 6/10 all in the last 25 minutes of the movie. I suspect some higher up just had to put their hand in the pot and completely ruined the movie.
The Northman (2022)
Felt Flat... just OK.
Going in, given the theme and the cast, I was looking forward to it. It ended up being borderline a chore to sit through and pay attention to the movie.
They seemed to not focus on one aspect of what they were trying to do and it made everything feel flat. There is some action, some love story, revenge, nice scenery, and artsy attempts at profound illusion/fantasy.... but it doesn't flow and some of it seems completely unnecessary.
I do recommend you give it a go if you were interested in seeing it but temper your expectations and don't be afraid to walk away if you don't enjoy the first 45 minutes... because it doesn't really get better or change pace at all.
The Terminal List (2022)
Not Buying It
I never read the book so I don't have a basis to compare but
The premise was great and it was going along fine until the last episode.
I was on board with his crusade of revenge but when he started killing innocent people it also killed the whole story. All the Law Enforcement and Security personnel at the end who had nothing to do with the cover up and are just acting on orders... how many other would be Reece's are now dead?
The kicker, Ben was in on it the whole time? At no point does he protect his own interest and eliminate Reece while completely having his trust? He diked him over once already but you're trying to sell me on his character not doing it again? That's a huge plot hole and a very lazy device to try and sell a story.
What started as promising and compelling ended up feeling like a waste of time.
Iron Chef: Quest for an Iron Legend (2022)
It's OK, Room to Improve Though
It's not the original so no point in comparing.
The chairman's antics/animated movements are a little over the top and it feels almost cartoonish at times.
I skipped the Inon Chef vs Iron Chef episode because I have no interest in seeing the Iron Chefs battle each other.... maybe if this was a longer season or was already a few seasons in.
The season is short.
The finale was 5 vs 3 so I honestly didn't expect the challenger to have a chance... Each Iron Check could focus on one dish where the challenger had to spread their attention over several dishes. The challenge itself is to be able to outperform and Iron Chef... add to it a numbers advantage and it just doesn't evoke that feeling of watching a winnable struggle.
Loved the pace of the show and the special guest judge each episode. The hosts were great and had charisma so I enjoyed watching and never really felt a lull.
I'd like to see another season and hopefully it improves.
Serial Killer with Piers Morgan (2017)
Piers Morgan with Piers Morgan
I don't like to give 1's but I made it through 1 and 1/2 episodes and had to turn it off.
The show could be interesting if it focused on the killers and the crimes, the victims and their stories.... but it's basically Piers Morgan playing word games for the sake of stroking his own ego. At one point he's talking to the convicted killer and asking if he ever slept with prostitutes ... some chitter chatter later... and the guy recounts he never would knowingly pay and then quips you take a girl on a date and buy her dinner... that's paying for it. Piers then fires back with "So you're saying all women are prostitutes?!?" That's when I turned it off.
I watch these for true crime, not Jerry Springer.
Our Father (2022)
Intriguing Subject, Tedious Documentary.
What this Doctor did was wrong, there's no way around that.
The telling of the story just fails on so many levels though. It focuses way too much on emotion and theory and opinion. What these people are dealing with is real enough.
I wish they would have explored how misleading patients was not criminal or, at the very least, ethically unjust. If the patients are under the assumption their sample is being used for insemination but it was instead replaced with another sample... how is that not fraud and/or malpractice? Maybe there is no legal recourse but was civil recourse ever explored? They should have focused on Who, Where, When, Why, What, and How..... not Would, Could, Should... It just feels like a huge chunk of the actual story is missing.
Hightown (2020)
Decent, worth watching.
There are some cliches and tropes that are over played and some plot holes and suspend belief moments but overall the show is well written, well acted, and well directed.
If you need something to binge or are just looking for a different kind of drama then definitely check this out.
It seems they left room for another season and 2, IMO, was better than 1, so I wouldn't mind a 3rd.
The Wilds (2020)
It was OK but had so much more potemtial.
My main issue is how they chop up the story. They could have cut the flashback/present day "controlled" scenes in half and added extra island scenes. The girl season was good... bad to excellent.... The boy season was barely watchable... and honestly, I FFWD past 90% of the guy scenes because it didn't make a difference with what was already unfolding in the girls story from season 1.
It could have been fantastic. Instead it's a labored "good".
Moon Knight (2022)
We'll see....Not off to a great start though.
The production value is there and I like the concept and what they're trying to portray. The acting is good and the writing is adequate but the tone is all wrong.
There is way too much buffoonery and not enough grit.
Seinfeld: The Bottle Deposit (1996)
This one doesn't fly, even for Seinfeld.
I love the series but this episode was lazy. No one is going to drop 20k on JFKs golf clubs and then just nonchalantly leave them in the back seat of a car.
Secrets in the Ice (2020)
Terrible Format
They present the stories as a guessing game of sorts and posit some ridiculous theories before actually explaining what the actual facts are. They should just present the stories forthright.and add additional context and background instead of chewing up time with nonsense. The content is interesting enough but the presentation is awful.
The Tomorrow War (2021)
Not a Total Waste of Time
It has some great acting and an interesting concept. The CGI and action is good. That's what allowed me to at least watch the whole thing.
The writing is terrible, the plot devices are awful, and some of the poorly timed jokes and forced humor just don't work.
Let's run roughshod through the research facility throwing caution to the wind but the minute we get to our exit, with bombers inbound with instructions to level the city mind you, we're just going to hang around in the stairwell for several minutes instead of hightailing it... or at minimum cautiously descend the stairwell with some sense of urgency.
The former department chair at Georgia Tech with a doctorate in earth and atmospheric sciences doesn't know a Volcanologist, or how to reach out to one, or even a Geologist at minimum (or apparently the earth and atmospheric scientist himself doesn't have any clue about volcanoes) ... BUT... the biology teacher has a kid in his class that really likes volcanoes... phew - day saved!
I get the struggle of not wanting to see your grown daughter die but at that point your whole reason to live is to go back in time and make sure you save the human race ... which, you know, includes your daughter... Oh, and now that we have the toxin we still can't kill the queen/female alien because...just because? It's sedated and chained so you don't actually need to waste the toxin on it to kill it... just pick another method and get to it.
Soldiers come from the future asking for help from an alien invasion that started in Russia.
Hero comes back with toxin to kill the aliens and save the world... tells military to mass produce and go to Russia to end threat early... military asks for proof the aliens are in Russia... (huh?)
Ok, now that we're in the alien spaceship with the toxin lets just inject a few and wait around for the others to wake up... but we have C4 just in case... why isn't C4 Plan A again?
There are many more but those stood out to me.
It's decent enough for mindless action but could have been so much more.
The Mandalorian: Chapter 10: The Passenger (2020)
A lazy episode.
The visuals were good but there was no substance. There were a lot of moments that offered themselves to be plot thickening but, ultimately, nothing happened that mattered. Why did the kid eat the eggs? I was waiting for the unforeseen wisdom the kid possessed to explain why the kid ate the eggs... did the force tell it to because it knew the eggs wouldn't survive so it was "incubating" a few only to regurgitate them later to "save the day"? Definitely disappointed with this episode.... it felt like a 15 minute side bar drawn out into an entire episode. I like the interaction with the rebel pilots, but even that felt forced. This episode seems to have no point concerning the series as a whole. Was it just trying to be action packed/cute? Please tell me the creators of the show aren't selling out for the sake of exploiting a "cute" baby Yoda.
This episode was just plain terrible compared to the series as a whole.