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Black Swan (2010)
OMG, IT LIKE AN ALLEGORY OR SUMTIN'
I'll keep this short, since I'm doing this from memory. Also since this movie gets wrongfully praised for being good.
OMG, her life is like perfectly mirroring da performance she is a part of, isn't that nuts? And if it's not super obvious, he transforms the house of cards lady into the black swan... Or was that Meg from Family Guy? WHOA, MIND BLOWN. It's so hoaky. And blatant that I'm not sure it's not supposed to be ironic and satirical or not.
Everything is acted FINE and shot FINE. Score is also JUST fine as well. NOTHING in this film is remarkable, groundbreaking, innovative, or interesting. Another CRITICBAIT movie.
Looked it up, it was Mila Kunis. WOW... maybe that's why I couldn't be invested in it, since it was her ATTEMPT, not successful mind you, to get a big girl role. Sorry Jackie/Meg, can't see you as anything else. It should have been that reporter from House of Cards.
Poor Things (2023)
HE'S A HACK FILM MAKER
Let's get this out of the way, I've only seen one other movie of his, and that was "Killing of a Sacred Deer" and this will be my second and last film of his. I get his GIMMICK.
1) Hide behind your Euro-Trash origins to curb legit criticism, kind of like Modern Disney movies hide behind their gimmicks to the same cowardly and dishonest manner.
2) peddle your crap to the US as "cultured" since "European Man" made it. "OOH he's foreign, so if we don't like it, it makes us come off as jingoistic and uncultured, EVERYONE CLAP AND APPLAUD THE GRECIAN."
3) Be as shocking and provocative as a John K cartoon, with as much depth as well.
His movies aren't thinkers, they're not deep, they're just crude. How this was considered some feminist masterpiece when it was clearly made by sheltered little boys through and through, is beyond me. Also, why is modern feminism so "sex-centric". This is the most boring overbloated "Frankenstien's Monster" tale I've ever watched. Was it beautiful to look at, yeah, it was. BUT Beauty without substance is wasted. Also Emma Stone's portrayal of mentally handicapped borders on near black-face levels of offensiveness. This is some "I Am Sam" and "Riding the Bus" understanding of mentally deficient and how to portray it on screen. HONEY, if you're breaking things, you can't be flinching before the the smashing of the plates and the jars. People of that mental acuity wouldn't flinch since that would show a level of cognition they lack.
Needless to say, this is more criticbait drivel, that the educated (read: not actually worldly or intelligent) pretend to glean more meaning out of than is actually there. This is typical of his movie. At least the guy who made The VVITCH and The Lighthouse had a story and substance to the shock of it. I didn't like either of those movies, but I respect them for what they are and see what he was going for. This is just "Lars Von Trier at home." The Dollar Tree Lars. This is barely above A Serbian Film in terms of "ART". The difference between the two, at least A Serbian Film is honest in being exploitative trash, this pretends its exploitative trash is high class since it wears Victorian Clothing.
Naruto (2002)
Good Message, BORING
I LOVE THE OVERALL THEME OF THIS ANIME, it's great, you can either be a victim of your upbringing and past, or use it to springboard and motivate you. Then go from mopey kid to mopey kid and make them realize the purpose of living. Well, that's one aspect is Naruto's "naivety" infecting others to better themselves.
The other aspect of it is lack of animation, and boring multi-episode battles with a lot of padding. I didn't realize this during its initial run as a teen, but holy padding and lack of animation... SO MUCH TALKING AND PEOPLE STANDING STILL, and a lot of characters have a mask on, so they don't have to animate lip flaps, and as such means you're just watching a still image. There have literally been multiple times when I heard Audio and thought my PC was being buggy since intel GPUs kind of suck, and I thought the video froze while the audio continued, and then nope, that's just how it's "ANIMATED".
Around the QUARTER MARK, we get introduced to the main bad guy for the series and most of the next series, and is he just not interesting and boring. He loves to talk a lot and is just so one dimensional and boring. They're going for a more intelligent Joker angle, and it doesn't work.
I'm on Episode 73, and I'm hating this re-watch. The core message and theme are great, but there's not enough villain varieties to supplement the main villain, that it just gets boring. Also, the recycling of gags gets annoying as well. Mind you, this anime is meant for 7-12 year olds in Japan, that it kind of contextualizes the flaws I'm seeing as a now 36-year-old with over 100 anime watched up to this point. The thing as an adult I do find more interesting is the JAPAN mythology and demonology stuff, but there's not enough of that to keep me sated. I MIGHT, have to abandon this one due to sheer boredom.
Dolls (1986)
It's a perfect, FUN MOVIE
Didn't realize this was Stuart Gordon's doing. Explains a lot. If you're looking for real horror, move along. This is just fun silly horror. Not for children due to language and violence, but a fun movie nonetheless. As long as you come in this wanting a fun time, you'll get it. Not as campy and cheesy as Killer Clownz, but it knows what it is and plays to that strength.
The Plot; a dysfunctional family gets stranded due to bad weather, and a nice elderly and very eccentric couple allow them and some other people who also got stranded due to bad weather, a place to stay. Then the dolls come alive and that's when the fun begins. Lots of stop-motion and fun is had. Also, the Old Couple were the best actors by far, punching way above their pay grade. They play it more serious, where everyone else seems to be playing it more like the B-Movie it is. And normally when a couple of actors are being too professional and everyone else is... not phoning it in, but maybe not taking it that serious... that could clash and ruin the movie. Everyone seemed to be having fun since it comes out that way in the performance, and it's what saves it. This is a CHARMING movie, with a sweet (as in... cherubic) message.
It's a very satisfying movie when you expect nothing more of it, but to not feel like you wasted time watching it. This is a very CHUCKY like movie. Where it's having fun, acknowledges the silliness of the premise, and fully leans into it a perfect amount to be enjoyable and not try-hard.
Smiling Friends (2020)
Wow, talk about something that shouldn't work and 100% does.
I am a huge fan of the New Grounds kids, who isn't... Love Zach on Oneyplays, and then this show happened. This is a show that's all about being random, but per-episode, there's a weird cohesion. You don't really ask why condiments are sentient. Why one character is 3D rendered and that's actually part of his gimmick. It just works. Also, it's not an overly crude show, it's blue from time to time but never overtly offensive. I think since I do watch a lot of OneyNG stuff and OneyPlays it was kind of fun seeing where Zach's friends popped up from time to time. This is definitely one of those shows I've now gone back to, over a dozen times now, and binged.
Why this show works is, since there's this impish quality to it, which I assume is 100% Zach's doing as the gremlin he is in real life. There's this weird child like innocence in it that Mike's character Pim brings into every job, that maybe a 20-something year old really shouldn't have still; matched perfectly with the apathetic nature of Charlie.
I think this show has longevity and could be that cartoon that stands the test of time. It's wildly creative, humor has something for everyone. And if you follow Zach enough, you know where some of the jokes and premise come from. Like the scene where they rip apart the forest demon and start eating it, stemmed from an OneyPlays idea where Zach relays an animation he wanted to do that involved children, a monkey and a birthday party. Where the mother brings home a monkey and for some odd reason the kids start eating the monkey alive.
Maybe for that reason, I think this show works for me, since I know the story behind the jokes, like someone had to point out the Boss's intro scene in episode one is a call back to an old Zach cartoon he did, it's just full of fun easter eggs and cameos like Chills, David Firth, Gilbert Godfrey of all people, and so on. Though, you don't need that level of knowledge or background understanding to enjoy these episodes.
Koala Man (2023)
Meh, EXTREMELY MEH
Just binged the first season and it was MEH. Got like two genuine laughs, otherwise, NOTHING. For the most part, this show isn't offensive, but then there was one episode where it was really going for the edgy humor, and it didn't make sense and seemed to be a Justin Roiland suggestion. Nothing was 100% off about it, but nothing was ever on about it either.
The premise is like a cute 1-off joke that they stretch for a whole season. Delusional man, wants to be a super-hero, a premise that was done in Kick-Ass, and Super, to better results. The character I liked the most was the daughter, liked her petty want to be popular, and getting happy as her competition gets eliminated one-by-one in rather clever ways. Those were like the only enjoyment I got out of this series. Other than that, it's another one of those "LOL RANDOM" series, which I don't know if Zach Hadel of all people, reigns in Mike making Smiling Friends work, or if that's just a better premise for the LOL Random humor to work its magic. Here it seemed like most of the time, it was just done for the sake of it and not the plot of it. While I laughed at the thug Kangaroos, it also didn't really make sense.
I don't regret watching it, but I wouldn't recommend people watch it, it's like alternative comedy, where you acknowledge where the jokes are supposed to be, but rarely if ever laugh at said jokes.
Jujutsu Kaisen (2020)
I DO NOT GET THE HYPE
I'm caught up, with season one and season 2, just recently finished season 2.
I am in the minority here and think all the characters kind of are terrible. This is an odd show where the concept is EXTREMELY INTERESTING AND COOL, and everything is done EXTREMELY WELL, but man those characters are bland and that story is so generic. It's like Lord of the Rings, long winded, cool well thought out world, but boring stories.
Season 2 is half backstory, and then half current day. BUT HERE'S THE PROBLEM, the story is terrible, it's been said thousands upon thousands of times, this is the most boiler plate Shonen ever. The philosophical elements are High School grade at best. That it makes it impossible to really enjoy it.
This show does the extremely RARE feat of making Action SUPER BORING. Yeah it's fast paced, well drawn, and they do some interesting visual flares at time to denote reality bending and power of an attack, but MAN they go on long, not Dragon Ball level long, but some fights last 3 episodes and when you only have 12 of the 23 episodes to finish it, it gets boring.
I loved the explanation for curses and demons in the first season. I thought that was very unique, I thought the POWERS were really cool, love the powers in this anime, the switch places power, the domain rules. It has all of the elements of cool there, but misses. The character aspects are neat, like that the typical dumb meat head character is actually rather intelligent and insightful in battles, but I've seen that done before.
Then Season 2 is like; "We watched Game of Thrones and Walking Dead, so we'll emulate that, and just go on a supporting cast murder and handicapping spree." That wasn't novel then, isn't novel now. Since after the third one of that, you just turn your brain off and stop caring. And by season's end, there's like a dozen of that.
Also, pretty sure I know where this is going, I mean I have jumped ahead and checked past Season 2 in the Manga, but like with My Hero, they explained a MacGuffin in season 2 and hinted at it in season one, that you can predict where it is going. Like by episode 2 of My hero of Season 1, I knew exactly how that was going to play out, and how that was going to end. "Oh I can use all the quirks of the past 9 users and One For All gave the power to his quirkless brother... wonder what's going to happen... spoilers kids, it hasn't been written yet, but All For One, will tell him that he too has the quirk stealing power of One For All, an oversight One For All didn't think about."
Just like here, spoilers, the curse in the protagonist who is so forgettable even though I JUST binged all 23 episodes of season 2, escapes the prison of its host. BUT I'm calling it now, the new game plan is a world treasure hunt for cursed objects for our boy to consume and take their powers from. Or he becomes one with that weird deity thing that's ageless. Since in season one they said there were a few Sukis or whatever like curses out there chopped up into pieces.
There is a lot to like here, just assembled in a weird way. It's like those memes of what it's supposed to look like, and what it actually looks like, when it comes to people recreating crafts at home. A lot of wasted talent here, on a story that I don't think has legs.
Survive Style 5+ (2004)
This is a fun movie and very infectous
I really love this movie, personally like a 9 out of 10, but it is super JAPANESE. It's live action Anime of the most absurdist kind. It tries to do the Tarantino thing, but is too bubble gum pop for that that it misses. With that said, the 5 storylines that are here are fun to watch even if their connecting thread at the end isn't as logical or well thought out as I'm sure the director and writer wanted it to be.
The issue with this is that it's literally in its title; "STYLE" with little substance. It's a joke for a joke's sake without care for joke structure. Let's throw everything at the wall and see what sticks. THANKFULLY for it, since it's so kinetic and fast. Gives off the illusion that a lot of it sticks, especially if you like Japanese humor. They're very Tex Avery over there, who was my favorite Looney Tunes Director. Lots of visual gags and word play gags that if you get some fan subs does a little better job translating than the official.
This isn't for everyone, but if you want absurdism with little substance then look no further. This will sate you for a while. It's a dark movie with a bubble gum pop mask on. It's like the song Chick Habit by April March. It's this really poppy song about a sexual predator stalking women, and then picks the wrong girl who will be more than happy to put an end to his predator ways. SUCH a happy melody and sung so frenetically that it's great. This movie is just like that song. I also liked Vinny Jones in this, he's doing is Football/Soccer Hooligan shtick, but it works in the context of the movie, and the writer clearly knew how to add it to the story. Wouldn't be surprised if he wrote Vinny's character first, which makes more sense when you watch the movie.
Kaidan (1964)
Arthouse at its most Arthouse but for Japanophiles
There's NO DENYING this is a BEAUTIFUL movie. It's so quiet, like a babbling brook, but that's kind of the problem. If you're not interested in Japanese Culture then there's not a lot to like here. Everything is shot beautifully, it's acted well but its pace is purposefully meditative to be reflective. It's one of those movies where if it were in a film class, they'd pause after each story and dissect it for the whole week.
I liked the movie, but the reality is, there isn't much here, this is one of those movies that people watch to feign cultural superiority and intelligence. This is why it's a 7 out of 10 since it says nothing of real importance, it's there to look pretty, and only give you the cliff notes of the cliff notes on some Shinto demonology. There's some cool concepts here, and you can't hate it, since it's so beautiful and well executed but at the end of the day, upon reflecting, you realize nothing was really said. I liked it as a Japanophile, since I love me some anime and japanese horor and survive style five and Rampo Noir. Even though this has supernatural elements, this is classic GOTHIC HORROR or more cerebral horror, character studies.
So, no I don't think this is one of those films you have to see, but if you see it, be prepared for its slow pace.
Talk to Me (2022)
Chekov's Kanagroo
I'll keep this short. IT'S BORING. This wasn't creepy, I was bored throughout most of it. Had two GOOD GAGS, the very last bit at the end, I thought was cute and clever. Then the weird out of place Event Horizon/Jacob's Ladder scene with the boy being tugged gently by the spirits. OTHER THAN THAT... IT WAS LAME.
The writing was bad, the acting was mediocre, it was shot competently... Since apparently two youtubers with a prank channel made it. I don't know what the message was. Some said drug abuse allegory, others' have said social media addiction, but none of those really jive since there weren't any druggies in the movie and social media is such a foot note in this that I just don't see that angle. To me I think it was more on the nose of "LETTING GO". Since that's how you break the connection. The catalyst to this never pays off, and I can't tell if I don't care enough that it didn't, or if it was done for "ARTISTIC" reasons. I literally got done watching this and it barely stuck with me. Oh and I think the creators thought it would be funny and quirky if the one girl's ring tone was Crazy Frog... REMEMBER CRAZY FROG? HOW ZANY. These kids weren't even alive for Crazy Frog, oh god that's so depressing to think, that the actors might be younger than Crazy Frog... Getting old sucks.
As for this movie, this is a great "HIGH SCHOOL LEVEL HORROR MOVIE", that's the people who would be scared by this. It has that blood and gore "R-RATED" edge, and has the appearance of being deep that they'll chew up and make them think they're watching something spooky and nuanced like Pan's Labyrinth or The Devil's Backbone. This is for the Wish Upon crowd. I can't hate it though, for a first time big boy movie, it was good on that aspect. AND GOOD ON THEM FOR REALLY NOT GOING FOR JUMP SCARES and easy avenues of James Wan horror movies. They're better than James Wan, which is a low bar, but a bar they did clear. Well done you guys.
Gantz (2004)
When ANGST AND EDGY have a baby, it's GANTZ
Easily in the top 5 of anime for me, and it's not for everyone. It is crass, it is ugly, gory, lot of nudity, not a lot of purpose, it is NEGATIVITY.
The premise is simple; you lose your life in a dumb way, you get a second chance at it by playing a bounty hunter game. Collect 500 points and you have a chance of a second life. THOUGH, die during the game, and that's it. The enemies they fight are real, and other worldly. This is not a children's anime. I think they call this Seinen. OR adult anime. Where Shonen is like pre-teen to teen. You'll get gore in your Shonen, but usually no nudity. This has it all, any topic you might be uncomfortable with, this will address it and do it in the most offensive for offensive sake possible. One of the contestants that gets tasked to play GANTZ is a dog, that they call "BUTTER DOG" and well it's a special kind of k9 used to do something with peanut butter and women. YEAH, this show is amazingly juvenile. It's edgier than Shadow the Hedgehog or Blink 182. We're surpassing Combichrist level of Edge.
The name of the game is Nihilism and Futility. You may survive the night, get to go back home in a living form, but you're going to be transported back to do it again, to earn that 500 points to freedom. The real kicker is, each enemy they kill barely whittles away at that 500 points to really drive home that futility.
Why do I like it? It scratches that Nihilistic itch. And even though it's a very bleak and depressing anime when you ruminate on it, it's great. Also Super Shooter by Rip Slyme is amazing as the opening song. The thing this anime does well is the animation, it's fast and kinetic. The first hunt in the show, they play with the idea of morality, and then after it, quickly forego it. There doesn't seem to be a deep message here, or it trying to say anything too profound, save for everything is futile save for the connections you make with your fellow man. Since as shallow as this anime comes off, the main character grows more cynical as the battles go on, but still grows as a person. Not in this anime, but in the material, he does get the 500 points and chooses to stay in the game acting as a sort of guide for the other players that come into the story later, hoping the more he plays the more he can find out about what GANTZ is and how to stop it. They breifly go into the "LORE" of GANTZ in this series but not enough to direct you down a path. Which I kind of respect. I respect this anime due to its narrow-mindedness and singular focus it has. Monster of the week battle royale anime and that's all that really matters. You get slight player backstory glimpse but what amounts to a blurb on a baseball card for most. Some get some indepth look. Like the supporting "actor" gets a great family abuse backstory. As I said, every taboo you can think of, every edgy topic they cover it, and usually without tact or nuance.
My suggestion, go on YouTube and watch Supereyepatchwolf's video essay on this property to see if you're into it, since he also does a better job of explaining the philosophy of the story since he read and saw all the GANTZ projects and goes into the Author of it as well. I love it, but it is far from being recommendable.
Garth Marenghi's Darkplace (2004)
It's as dry and British as you can get, if that's not your thing, Sorry.
Premise: Mockumentary meets cheese hospital drama with a paranormal problem.
Everyone just plays their part perfectly. Garth is a perfect up his own butt pretentious author wanting to be an actor, but being bad at both, creates comedy gold. Everyone is just terrible, as they're supposed be. All the male actors a so pretentious during the behind the scenes part, but in reality are just a notch above community theater actors in a public access Scifi horror hospital drama. They love talking themselves up as if they're the next Orson Wells or as Garth tries to humble brag about being the next Stephen King. I think he literally says; "I don't like drawing those comparisons but others have made those about my works."
It's so hard to describe this show, it's not a mockumentary, it's like the special features/commentary retrospective on this fake TV show called Dark Place.
The humor is sarcastic, a little racy at times, all the time silly and just fun. IF you like your humor dark, dry and sarcastic. You'll love this show. It's one of my favorites. Thanks Adult Swim for licensing this, since that's how I originally saw it.
One Piece (2023)
Way better than it had a right to be, especially from Netflix
This was way better than it had a right to be. A few annoyances here and there with characters, but OVERALL... I think it was a successful first season.
The two biggest issues with this adaptation was casting of Luffy and Zoro. Half the time Luffy's native Mexican Accent was too thick and he also was kind of a bad actor. He was doing his best which you can clearly tell, but sometimes lines just didn't hit like they should or intended to. I think the writing and characterization was there, but the delivery wasn't. He was too flat. Also even though he's younger than me, he looks older in some scenes, it's weird. In some scenes it looks like a 40+ year old man playing a 19 year old instead of a 33yo man.
Zoro, was just a lot of wrong, and it wasn't the actor's fault, this time we could blame the writing and characterization. Choice wise, I think they picked the right person. But they made him too dead pan, where in the animation he was stoic not dead and one dimensional. I don't know why they wrote him as a monotone and bland character.
Everyone else I thought was casted well. Even race swap Usopp. I think was great. I mean Buggy couldn't have been casted better, nor that one Warlord, I mean that was perfect acting and casting. Only iffy one was probably Sanji, who given the fact that his name is super Japanese, probably should have been another Japanese person, or gone with an actual frenchman. But he grows on you.
As for the story, I thought it was great, wasn't overly political, respected the tone and heart of the original source material and was a great example of how to shoehorn diversity into a series. By not mentioning it. They started treading dangerously preachy waters with the Fishmen, but that's technically in the source material as well. Which talk about taking a silly concept and some how making it work for live action. I think the Arlong group looked great, that one guy did have cartoonishly large lips, but it wasn't terrible.
Then there's the fight scenes, the fact that a majority of it is done by the actors themselves is insane. It looked great and again, found an impossible balance of realism and cartoon for the fights. I am actively looking forward to season 2. They started out super strong here, and I just (knock on wood) don't see them fumbling anytime soon. It's not perfect, I think Inyaki needs more acting lessons and they need to fix Zoro from being so one dimensional. They loosened him up at the end but, it didn't feel like natural character growth, just felt like Oda was like, "hey you know Zoro's not that tightly wound, give him some more character." The actor can DEFINITELY HANDLE IT, especially looking at his resume, he's probably the most seasoned one for this show, having portrayed the live action version of a lot of anime characters. NEEDLESS TO SAY, they did well here, can't wait to see this continue.
Ôedo roketto (2007)
It's my favorite and I can't tell you exactly why.
Normally i don't go for the rom-com stuff, I'm usually a very TYPICAL Western Anime lover and only scratch the surface level of animes and tend to go with the popular. I think I first heard of this via ON-Demand surfing and it was one of the free ones. RIGHT off the bat it hooked me.
Premise:
Edo era where fun is outlawed due to limited resources, a brave fireworks creator makes it his mission to make his row house happy with his dazzling fireworks that are so big and shoot so high that even the emperor and his men will have to take notice, or something like that. During a test run, a mysterious explosion happens, thinking it was a dud payload, they discover an alien ship without aliens in it. Next day a mysterious woman arrives. Asking our young protagonist if he can build her a rocket to the MOON so she can go back to her base there. I think that's early on. I don't know. The plot's very loose. High jinks ensues and a romance develops.
Why I love it:
-This is pure JAPANESE absurdist comedy with a very heartwarming story. I liked the rebellious nature of our protagonist and the row house. The characters are for the most part all fun.
-The twists while few, are fun.
-While the stakes are high, there's rarely tension or drama which I could see turning a lot of people off. This is extremely light hearted. If I had to give it an MPAA rating it would be PG, since the humor can get a bit adult at times. It's mostly innuendos and never blatant but there's also a little blood here or there. BUT the core of it is very sweet and not scary.
-Some great 4th wall breaks in this anime, and I love me some good 4th wall breaks.
Cons:
-I can see a few, personally as I said, this is 100% my favorite anime as of now, and I've got about 100 animes under my belt. The biggest con, being it's not serious, even the serious stakes are treated half-heartedly. So there's no drama or tension, it's kind of like the marvel problem, as soon as things get serious, it's followed by a gag. BUT if viewed as a satire and comedy, it's not as problematic.
Conclusion:
If you like rom-com animes then here you go. It's a great one. It's easy viewing for those who love anime and its idiosyncrasies This isn't an intro anime for someone.
Awakenings (1990)
Schmaultzy, good intentions, bad execution.
I love psychology, and a fan of Oliver Sacks, this movie is definitely made safe for a wide audience. As such there's a lot of pitfalls. MOSTLY in the acting and directing. I was shocked to see Penny Marshall's name as the director. She's usually quite talented. Don't know what was going on here.
The movie is about an epidemic of water on the brain patients and how an early life illness turned them all catatonic, and a drug usually used to treat Parkinson's helped 'awaken' them. So it has its manufactured feel good moments, does end on a sad note, but you realize, according to the movie, that it was the hospital that failed everyone and not the drug or the Sacks facsimile played by Robin Williams.
The thing with portraying mental patients is, you have to be SUPER CAREFUL, and I don't think they were. A lot of these performances border on caricature, and I know it's not INTENTIONAL, but the road to hell are paved with good intentions. Like this one scene where Sacks (I forgot his fake name in the movie) was doing his rounds as a new doctor on the ward, and is interviewing a normal woman, then takes out his pen, clicks it and she cartoonishly freaks out. YIKES. I mean I get that happens, but her "acting" was more comedic than believable manic.
Sigh, it's a movie of its time, and as such ages like milk. I don't recommend it.
Terrifier (2016)
Good ol' fashion low substance exploitation horror
So, reading a lot of reviews has this comparing it to 80s horror, but this is way more GRIND HOUSE than 80s slasher. Since there really isn't any story, at least with most of your tent-pole horrors of that genre there was a semblance of a plot, this doesn't really have one. It's gore for the sake of gore, and it's good. Not amazing, given how shallow it is, but entertaining if you're in the mood for mindless gore. No sappy backstory about child abuse and how a clown made him laugh. NO deep metaphor about how he justifies it by playing a clown and hiding behind a face (which in this case is a rubber mask). It's clown kills girls, movie ends.
As many have stated the actor playing the clown who doesn't speak if I'm remembering it correctly is great, the girls are typical genre grade actresses. Not offensively bad, good, but not amazing, though, again, the script doesn't really allow them to blossom, and what little dialog is there, is delivered well and believable enough. A solid "B" for acting.
In summation, not much to say about this movie, it's a gore flick, and if you're into that thing, it won't disappoint, if you want more substance in your horror, this ain't it.
Ghostbusters: Afterlife (2021)
TOO SAFE, TOO LAZY, TOO NOSTALGIC
This wasn't a TERRIBLE movie, just way too SAFE of a movie. Safe and Lazy. There were glimmers of greatness, with many glaring issues. When it was its own thing, it was fine. I didn't mind the female protagonist, since they dialed her character back quite a bit and she was nicely restrained that it seemed REAL, like a REAL NERD. EGON was always a CARTOON of a NERD and that worked in the 80s. SO got to give it to Ivan's son to be reserved with that caricature.
Pros:
-Lead female, hell all the kids, they were usually above good.
-Paul Rudd, the only one of the adults actually caring about the work he was assigned for. Clearly one of those people who regardless of the project will give it 110% and it shows. That's probably why they cut most of his scenes out.
Cons:
-Adults, outside of Paul Rudd were terrible, also the police father was fine, and Ernie Hudson. The mother especially, is she a known actress? Since she gave off community theater vibes. It was bad, she played her character so hammy. WE GET IT YOU HAVE DADDY ISSUES. Jeez, they never let off of that ONE CHARACTER TRAIT almost all the adults in this movie have.
-No one wanted to make this movie but SONY and it showed. This has laziness all over it.
-The set designs were mediocre at best, laughable at worst. Like the "ANCIENT CITY UNDER THE TOWN" looked like the set it was. What was with all the sharp lines and "low poly" look? Like the town was fine, nothing offensive nothing wrong, was perfectly cliched and fitting.
-NOSTALGIA is all we have to offer, nothing new. This is how you know this was SONY'S desperate attempt to salvage the deader than Harold Ramis studio that is Ghost Corps. That's not going to be a thing, Sony. Your movies for the most part are terrible. Talk with your TV division since, for whatever reason, you have managed to have nothing but massive hit tv shows after massive hit tv shows. THEY OWN SEINFELD, I hate SEINFELD, but I know that it's a juggernaut. AND THEY OWN BREAKING BAD, Wheel of Fortune, and so many giants. Their movies are usually stinkers unless they have to beg Disney to save them like with the current spider-man series. THOUGH admittedly Into the Spider-verse was 100% them and amazing. By their standards.
-Let the dead stay dead, don't CGI (POORLY) them into a movie, especially not this one.
-WAY TOO SAFE, there's a few swears here and there, but the jokes were safe, the story was the first movie but now in a small town. The new "ghosts" were market tested for toyetic qualities. WHICH by the way, Muncher or whatever it's called is terrible and ugly and not in a cute way like Slimer was. This was focus tested and corporate as it gets, oh look diversity, everyone except middle eastern and hispanic were represented. White girl hooks up with the asian kid, white boy hooks up with black girl. YAY, luckily they didn't go more woke than that. BUT it's there, and it's obvious what they're doing.
Conclusion:
6/10 is generous but it was cute, you could show your kids it, cringe at a lot of it as someone who liked the original two, so really now it's the 3rd time they've told the same story. CONGRATS, Ghostbusters, please go away now and leave some dignity behind, before Sony takes away the last bit of it. The kid actors were very decent, liked the protagonist a lot. She was reserved and restrained. This is a very SAFE, SERVICEABLE, and SANITARY sequel.
The Silence of the Lambs (1991)
This is legitimately one of my favorite comedies
I know, not a popular take but maybe it was supposed to be a good thriller and whatnot, but to me it was so beautifully comedic. I don't know if on the first viewing I was in the wrong head space or jaded by other films like this, but none of the horror stuck and frankly, I think Jody Foster is the ONLY GOOD actor in this movie. Everyone's too campy in it, too turned up to eleven and I don't know why that never gets brought up. EVERYONE goes on about how great Anthony Hopkins is and Ted Levine. To me I found them to be silly, frankly Hannibal is a worse movie but I felt Hopkins was better in that. BUT maybe since the new Clarice, seriously going to try to pass that fiery red head off as someone who is more brown haired with a hint of red to it as Clarice? ANYWAYS, I think since most actors in that movie were mediocre and below, Anthony sticks out as a better actor, him and that guy that offed himself, can't think of his name, begins with a P...
ANYWAYS, I did manage to see it before it got memed to death, so that wasn't why I found it funny. I think I saw it in 2000 so at 12. It's a great movie and as a black comedy it's one of the best. I love quoting lines and laughing at them, James Gum and Fredericka are the best Abbot and Costello Routine ever. I love this movie, top 20s for sure. I suck at ranking anything since everything is kind of disorganized like my house.
Hereditary (2018)
Closer to an 8 but not quite there.
I saw this movie shortly after it hit streaming, and I like it a lot, I've watched it a few times which is a telling sign for me if a movie is good. Sometimes I get in the mood to watch it.
It's a drama about loss, and then turns into a horror flick at the end. WHICH upon first viewing if you're not paying attention seems like it comes out of nowhere.
What this movie does well is build discomfort, and sadness. It pulls the emotions out of you that it's trying to. WHICH should be the goal of most movies, but his follow up to this movie was abysmal.
The GREATEST and I MEAN GREATEST problem with this movie, is the catalyst. The initiating incident, logically doesn't make sense. The son is 16+ and the daughter is I don't remember, like 3-6 years younger. IGNORING the fact that the son doesn't seem biologically possible by the two parents and is never mentioned to have been adopted, whatever. We'll dive into...
The incident is: Son wants to go to the party, mom forces son to take his sister with him, to make sure the son doesn't get too messed up at the high school party. It's established earlier on, she has a nut allergy... something they've clearly known about for a good chunk of her life. SOMETHING that any parent worth their salt, would know to make sure the child had an epipen on her, in the off chance of an incident. Something even the daughter at 12+ years of age would know to also have on her, given the severity of it. YOU SEE WHERE I'm going with this... GUESS WHAT HAPPENS. MANUFACTURED DRAMA.
Even with that giant GAPING problem, I liked the film and the ending I found silly but also creepy. Since while it seems like it came out of nowhere, it was technically well setup and is one of those things upon second viewing you realize it was foreshadowed.
Conclusion:
It's an atypical horror movie, more gothic horror, than slasher horror. AND that's the type I like more, since it's a heady horror (IRONIC) and sticks with you long after the movie is over. It's not for everyone, it's for a niche audience, arthouse horror fans. PEOPLE tired of the same horror schlock over and over again and want a new way to feel uncomfortable and scared. Hence why I also started looking over seas for my horror fix.
Everything Everywhere All at Once (2022)
Sometimes the hype is justified.
I haven't seen a movie with this much thought, heart, and reverence in a long time. Nor a movie actually do gay representation without it making feel like minstrel show. This was great. A little bloated hence the 8/10 rating. The acting seemed good, but not great. I feel like Evelyn was kind of week at the very end, everyone else was good.
In a movie that normally is bloated when they literally try to do everything and try 100 different genres/art-styles, it helps when you have one basic message to structure everything. SO in the end it kind of get repetitive when you get the "THEME" of the movie, but it's done in such an enjoyable way, that you forgive the fact that it treats you like a child and repeats the message like 15 times which is how long they say with rote learning it takes to memorize something.
Was a great movie, could easily recommend and A24 is really cementing themselves as the new powerhouse for indie. I can't even remember the previous champ, but I do remember there was one, it wasn't Miramax... HMM who was it. EITHER WAY great script, great message, no tokens, and managed to be orderly yet chaotic.
The Boys: The Only Man in the Sky (2022)
Not a bad episode
Biggest complaint, they propagandize too much this season, and the Gun Show scene is the best example of that. Also, tell us you know nothing about guns, without telling us. HOW EXACTLY is GUNPOWDER, a weapons expert (presumably) ricocheting a HOLLOW POINT round? See most comic writers are smart enough to go with the FMJ for gun-based heroes so they can do all those silly trick shots since the whole purpose of a hollow point is to deform and stop at sign of the first obstacle. YET, thankfully since this is a CGI effect, we stay on top of that hollow point the whole journey and magically hasn't splayed open like a flower. ALSO, when you go to a gun show with your gun, they tell you to disengage the slide, leave the magazine out and they run a massive zip tie through the mag well and ejector port, rendering it inoperable while on the show floor. AGAIN, do some research before getting on your silly little soapbox.
Other than that, it was a good episode. BUT your personal agendas are showing, AND cute subversion trying to make big corp look like an arm of the right wing. There is only so much disbelief one can suspend. When you kids aren't having a little blue-haired circle release fest, it's a good show. BUT you've proven time and time again, you're not talented enough to cover sensitive topics.
The Boys (2019)
Taking their foot and shoving their politics down your throat
Season One WAS AMAZING 8.5/10
Gritty, brutal and punk. Was great, like a more fleshed out Watchman series without that gross bargain bin feel to it like 99% of Amazon Prime Video stuff has. Amazing characters, great actors all around. Homelander especially who can go from Icon of Justice to terrifying sociopath in an instant. It was great, very promising. Understandable. NO REAL WORLD POLITICS in there, just IN-UNIVERSE politics. TIMELESS.
Season 2 7/10
OKAY, someone's starting to get too high off their own petard and now hijacking this show for their own political soapbox but it still is 70% show 30% CURRENT THING politics, not offensive, noticeable but not offensive and still somewhat enjoyable.
Season 3 4/10
Now they're just drunk with their influence and good will they garnered for the show. It's now 50% The Boys world a la the comics, and 50% REAL WORLD issues treated with the poise and grace of a wrecking ball. A Train has always been the annoying token character and at first they hid that fact, and it made some sense in the beginning. BUT THEN season 2 and 3 they removed the slight depth he had built up in Season 1 by the end and made him 100% political/social issue prop. Sanded all that depth down til it was perfectly flat and 2D.
The 'BLM' episodes were so blatantly offensive, inaccurate and borderline inciting. Then again you remember who used to own Amazon, now owns the Washington Post, which has lost countless defamation cases, against children even in the past 6 years, so makes sense. Then there was the continuation of the whole "Nazi" plot that was from the previous season which again was only in there for "THE MESSAGE" purpose. Just seems like everyone's character except Quaid was sanded down to be super 2-dimensional, and maybe Homelander.
I know there's two episodes left this season, but I don't see how they redeem this show. You took Starlight who was a great 3D badass woman and neutered her this season, why? HUEY that's his, comes into his own and kind of makes her redundant, another thing happens and shackles her even more. There better be a hell of a redemption arch for her by the end of this season, since currently I haven't seen a strong female character done this dirty since Margot Robbie's Harley Quinn (which is not her fault, I think she's a great Harley, they just write her terribly, a character that in the animated series was a DOCTOR of PSYCHIATRY, one of the best in the COUNTRY).
Conclusion:
DROP THE REAL WORLD POLITICS FROM THE SHOW, it will age this and not in a flattering manner. The writers aren't talented enough to treat serious sociol-political issues in a realistic light, or with the care they deserve. THE BLM episodes cartooned those events doing a disservice to both sides. BUT TO be expected when Seth Rogen, I laugh at stab victims who aren't on the same political side as me, even if they're minorities. Season 3 is at its best when it's dealing with ONLY IN-UNIVERSE topics. Like the change in power dynamics at Vought. That stuff was great, the stuff with A-Train comes off as minstrel show-like. Stick with the fantasy world of The Boys, and leave real world issues out of it. Since I don't doubt that next year you'll hamfist a ROE V WADE plot line in the show that won't make sense come off super forced, and once again, MIRE a show that started out AMAZINGLY.
What Is a Woman? (2022)
A documenatry for NO ONE
I originally had a whole review written but got declined for some odd reason, don't know why... No profanity, nothing.
Preface:
I'm a Republican (well now independent), and have always voted Republican. Daily Wire is a conservative site. I agree with the PREMISE of this movie. The EXECUTION was terrible. If anything this set things back.
The question is simple: "What is a woman?" and then we find out through very carefully selected and edited interviews where our HOSTILE and VERY ANTAGONISTIC host asks questions. Using that weaselly journalist logic: "What, I can't ask questions?" When you and everyone else knows exactly what they're doing. It's gross. That's the whole movie. In a nut shell.
The Problem:
Who is it for? Since it confirms the right's ideas on women and gender. ALSO it confirms the Left's ideas on the right being chauvinistic. SO literally no one wins in this situation and nothing gets to progress narrative wise. This was also the argument I had with 2,000 Mules. Daily Wire needs to find a way to be more subtle with their agenda, since this delivery vehicle is problematic.
Conclusion:
Don't watch it, even if you're like me, I was never offended by anything in this movie, rolled my eyes at his bearish approach to subject matters. It's too cowardly to go deeper than surface level.
The Red Pill (2016)
Writing this review after watching "WHAT IS A WOMAN"; THIS IS HOW YOU DO IT
After watching "What is a Woman?" the Matt Walsh/Daily Wire hit piece; it made me think of this AMAZING documentary. I've watched it nearly half a dozen times, and it's great. Watching someone's bias get eroded in front of you.
Casey Jay starts out as a typical 3rd wave feminist. Her subject matters were always about the female experience. Then her friend told her about this group of disgusting men she should expose and do a documentary on. So, she goes in there expecting it to be a 3rd wave feminist's dream gig, one that exposes and bolsters her views. Much like how Matt Walsh went into "What is a Woman" just to attack the "non-binary" community. BUT unlike Matt, Casey learns something and grows better for it.
Ironically this movie isn't so much about Men's Right Activists as it is about escaping your echo chamber and extending an olive branch to see another's view point. While the MRA stuff is very important, or at least as a man I think so. It plays second fiddle to the journey of discovery, shattering preconceptions, and growth.
The way she approaches men who have admittedly said TERRIBLE things online through their blogs, and how hostile of a character Paul Elam appears to be based off of his writings alone, is great. You can tell she's nervous at first and defensive, and start to see the growth of it all. She even has a meltdown mid movie, it's great. One of the best POLITICALLY CHARGED documentaries I've ever seen. Since unlike most, this has the ability to change people's perspective. It's not like "2,000 Mules" or "What is a Woman" or "Bowling For Columbine", where you go to see those for the confirmation bias. While now that the movie's been out for so long, the mystique of what this movie is about is lifted. SO... even if you know what the end result, I say the journey to it is well worth it.
Severance (2022)
I watched this and FROM back to back and they're kind of similar
I watched Severance first then watched From. Two shows RLM recommended. FROM is terrible avoid it. Severance is great. They're kind of similar since it takes place in limited locations, similar amount of episodes, both an hour long, but SEVERANCE CLEARLY has an idea of what it wants to do and where it wants to go. AS A RESULT, it uses its slow burn approach effectively.
WARNING: This is a slow show, there's always JUST ENOUGH to get you not to turn off, but if you're in for a good binge show and a weekend to kill, this might be one to watch for you.
Background/Premise:
The premise is very "We Can Remember It For You Wholesale"/"Eternal Sunshine"/"Total Recall". A great Philip K Dick style premise. Where it's futuristic, but plausible futuristic. So if you know your Philip K Dick and those movies, then it's nothing new for you, and you know what's going to happen, but they do manage to make it interesting and do unique things with it. IRONICALLY, this is more Paul Verhoeven's Total Recall than Eternal Sunshine, in plot and plot points. Definitely not in action.
The Plot:
Mark lost his wife, and isn't coping well with that fact, but is lying to himself that he is. SO... he learns about a company that literally lets you disconnect and create a virtual persona. Where your virtual persona does menial tasks and has its own life. It's still 100% you, but also not you. The work his persona does is actual work, and as such acts as an actual job.
The Good:
-There's so much good to it. The pacing is great, hour episodes that knows how to fill it. Also, weirdly finds a way, much like Office Space, to make white collar cubicle work interesting.
-For the most part, EVERY episode feels important and builds upon the mystery, and slowly entices you with bread crumbs. That by the end of it, I had that same feeling I had by the end of every season of Breaking Bad. Looking up to see when the next season will air and now growing impatient with having to wait for it.
-The set(s) are great; whether at work where it's super sterile and beautifully surreal while being grounded, it works with voids and monotony beautifully. Then when you're outside of Severance, where mark lives, is so uncomfortable and artificial feeling. NOTHING surreal about it, just kind of that same vibe I got when I saw images of those pre-fabricated neighborhoods built in the 50s/60s to accommodate the baby boom. Just have a great way to make everything feel artificial.
-Tonally/acting, I love it, it's like a Wes Anderson movie in tone. A lot of even keeled, micro-inflections. Kind of a whisper. Everyone is an intellect but not in a bad way. Like sometimes shows try this whole quiet talking and it just doesn't work. "Killing of a Sacred Deer" was a great example on how to screw this delivery up. They nail it. Since people do get loud when it makes sense, and whatnot.
-This is as black and sardonic as comedy gets. I view this as a dark comedy, maybe the creators do too. AND as such, it's great. NOW the thing about DARK Comedies is they're not OVERTLY funny and are IRONY based. They're observational pieces.
The Bad:
- Only once or twice did they pull the "Who's on First" trope, where you play cat and mouse with information between two people, but do it too long. This becomes more problematic when they introduce the other department. Which luckily only lasts 2-3 episodes but is like a b or c plot and not the main part of the episode.
-The brother-in-law is an annoying character and is a lazy role reversal type. Makes sense in context, but I don't want to overly spoil it. Mark's sister is pregnant and the father is overtly nervous and anal retentive. I mean, yes, I get that's his character, but in a show where every character and since most are tropes turned up to 9, that this character being turned up to 11 is and odd juxtaposition. LUCKILY by the end of the season, he grows on you and they mellow him out a bit. Don't know if during the writing meetings some of the staff members noticed that issue and brought that character down to 9 with the rest of them.
-There's a part of this season, that gets introduced near the end and seems very forced and contrived, is a romance angle between a main side character and a newer introduced one that seems more for DIVERSITY sake, instead of organic and fitting. This was the only part of the show that I felt like Apple stepped in and forced the creator's hand. Since it doesn't make a whole lot of sense. I'm of that persuasion myself, and it annoys me when it's done wrong and 9/10 it's very Soft-Shoeing. This was one of those times. Like it would have been cool that if severance character was one way and then non-severance wasn't creating a conflict like that. Since in Severance they're coy about it, and then quickly stop being coy about it.
Conclusion: This show isn't for everyone; it's a slow methodical show that keeps feeding you enough to keep you hungry for the next episode and starving for the next season. Even when you predict a twist in this show, they're clever enough to make it interesting that it doesn't destroy the fact that you called something before it happened. They can deliver, since knowing the twists here and there isn't important, it's how it plays into the overall narrative. Besides the weird "diversity" subplot at the end, that felt like Corporate APPLE interference, it's a great show. AND I hope it goes on to get a second season and no more than three. Since this premise is best if there is a known and definitive end. Hopefully this doesn't get greedy does two or three STRONG seasons, and exits a hero, instead of Walking Dead it, and living long enough to become its own worst villain.