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Beckham (2023)
Well Done Doc Shows Hard Truths
The Directing is quite impressive the way Stevens intercuts old photos and footage with the present, even showing us players reactions to old footage as they discuss it. Both David Beckham and his wife Victoria are even more likable and impressive to me after seeing all they went through together. The truths that Stevens exposes in this documentary are heartbreaking at times. As a parent, seeing what David Beckham went through, shouldering the horrific abuse by the country he loved, was so emotional and just makes you want to protect the young boy who had to deal with such a devastating ordeal. Even if you are not a big fan of football, just watching the truths exposed in this documentary is worth watching and will give you a new perspective on some very impressive people! I loved it!
Beautiful Disaster (2023)
Hard to Watch
Wow, I really tried to like this, but a combination of the Very bad dialogue and Extremely BAD pacing just made it so difficult to even just get through. I really don't blame the actors, it obviously wasn't their fault as far as the acting was concerned. I know a lot of people say the acting is bad but I don't think they realize how bad the writing and dialogue really are. It didn't give the actors a fighting chance. The pacing was absolutely the worst I've seen in a long time. They rushed relationships and tried way to hard to get so many milestones in such a short time that one short conversation was literally came off like years of back and forth in just a few sentences. It had a few cute parts and a few chuckles but overall it was pretty torturous to watch. Wow just really badly written, that as I am thinking about it now there were so many cringe things about this movie. I actually felt really bad for the actors since it's obvious that they really tried to make a pile of poo worth watching. Ugh such a bad script!
The Friendship Game (2022)
Convoluted Attempt at Teen Sci-Fi
I couldn't tell if this convoluted attempt to create a film was the fault of of the director or the writer, because the results of both are just so bad. Firstly the story makes no sense. Well it started with an idea, about an object that magically tests friendships, but after that it falls apart. Yes it literally falls apart after the first five minutes of the movie. The story meanders, gets weird and confusing and seems like the writer didn't know how to get the beginning of the story, to the end of the story. All the loose ends, and questions this film leaves are just frustrating, especially the question " How the heck did this film even get made?!!!". It's like someone who starts telling you something interesting and just stops mid-sentence and stares into space. The choices in scenes and how they were put together are dumbfounding and just add to the idea that the writer had no idea where this story was going. Jumping from one idea to another and adding elements that make you wonder what they're really trying to accomplish- which it looks like they don't even know. I couldn't even finish it, it was so bad, but watched it on fast forward to see if there was anything worth continuing, and even that was a waste of time. Don't bother wasting your time, just unwatchable.
Morbius (2022)
Fun comic book style movie.
I enjoyed the comic book style of this movie and really liked that they seemed to make Morbius closer to a hero, rather just villain turned anti-hero like in the comics. Unfortunately it seemed like the after credit scene was trying to erase what the movie seemed to be trying to accomplish. But it probably was just a set up for Sinister Six- which ai think, as of now, has been canceled.
The ending of the movie felt unfinished, and I wanted to see something with Morbius and Martine together. It just felt kind of abrupt. I immediately googled to see if there would be a part 2 of Morbius, but it seems like there's nothing in the works. Boo. Overall it was entertaining and better than I expected after mixed reviews.
Run Sweetheart Run (2020)
Nonsensical garbage! So BAD couldn't finish
I thought this movie must have been written by a misogynistic high school freshman boy who failed his writing class and is confused and afraid of menstruating women. Much to my shock it was written by a woman! Wow! But she probably failed her high school writing class too, had a lot of fear about having her period in public and obviously just wanted to get back at her writing teacher so forced her husband to fund this horrible excuse for a movie. I only made it about 16 minutes in when I had to read reviews and look up who wrote this piece of nonsensical garbage.
The story, even just the concept of the story, is so abominably bad. The dialogue is equally as abysmal. The writer obviously couldn't pick a lane and decided to go in all directions at once, making for a ridiculously, eye-roll-worthy, bunch of onscreen gibberish. I couldn't even finish this floating poo- that's how bad it is! How it's 5 stars and not consistently 1 star just leads me to believe the director/ writer has more than a few friends. Seriously life is too precious to waste even a second on this appalling excuse for a waste of film. AVOID!
Skinamarink (2022)
Worst Movie of All Time!!
How the ef did this get made?!!! Seriously?! Who would give any money toward actually producing this garbage?! Wow! Just, wow.
There is literally NOTHING to see in this movie. The director chose to just film shots of the house on grainy 60's style footage- including debris popping up on screen; filming- ceiling, walls, toilet, and especially the floor with toys on it. It's all noise, shots of the house and no humans. Okay well you can see a few seconds of a girl sitting on a bed and a very grainy, blurry face at the end. But the whole film is just shots of the house, some noise and barely any dialogue. It's boring grainy garbage. Nothing happens, there's nothing to see, I kid you not, just NOTHING!. How is it possible to get a film made that is just pov of a toddler walking through a house, filming random shots of the inside of his house on an old film camera from the 60s?! Well if you wonder what that would look like, wonder no more- it has been made in Skinamarink.
Non-opinion forming sheep will say this movie is "so cool, you just don't get it" to go along with pretentious influencers and critics, but it's really just the worst film ever get made.
Kathleen Madigan: Hunting Bigfoot (2023)
Microphone stand issue - Funny show
What the actual fuuu?! I sincerely hope whomever set up her microphone stand was immediately fired!!! Wow! This is a comedy special, not some 12:30am set at Joe's bar in Sheboygan! She tried, unsuccessfully, to fix it herself at the beginning, but she gets paid to tell jokes, not to work as a roadie. Why did no one immediately go out there to adjust the mic stand? It blocked half her face! The incompetence is unfathomable! She should be pretty POed at this BS.
However, Kathleen was a trooper and went through with her show and was pretty funny. She deserved better than the ridiculous microphone set up she had. When she was younger I thought her comedy was pretty hilarious, then she went through a little phase of so so, now she's back with the funny. Her show was very enjoyable.....except for the stupid microphone stand situation that was not her fault.
Maybe I Do (2023)
WTH? How did this get made?!
Thanks to the trailer we were tricked into watching this garbage! It was cut to look funny and cute but in reality, it was neither.
This horrible bore of a film was written like a play. A very dull play. The dialogue was total crap and the whole story just seemed totally dull. Even the big name older actors seemed to struggle trying to blather on with their ridiculously dull, badly written dialogue. Wow. Even adorable Emma Roberts couldn't save this crap. I mean, these are all amazing and professional actors... how the heck could they not see how pure and utter garbage and non-stop boredom the dialogue and story were when they read it?! I'm just shocked! What a waste of talent of a terrible script!!!
Gone in the Night (2022)
Abysmal Writing! Predictable, Boring, Poo
How the heck did this guy get Winona Ryder and Dermot Mulroney to do this insanely horrible movie?! Did he have some horrific dirt on them and forced them to do it with threat of revealing their secrets? Cuz I can't think of another reason why they would agree to do this garbage..
This is so poorly written with a ridiculous plot and creating stupid characters doing stupid things for stupid reasons that everyone voted I fast forward to see if anything interesting happens. I stopped at the exact right points to know the whole story and we all figured out the ending way before our heroine did. Just horrible!! No idea how he got stars in this waste of film and waste of time and no idea who gave him the money or the okay to make this piece of floating poo. Seriously horrible!
Alone (2020)
Blah Remake of #Alive
Whomever keeps saying Alone was written before the original #Alive is 100% WRONG! There is an ongoing court battle between HIG and Netflix because HIG bought the rights to remake #Alive (Fact). Netflix put out the dubbed version of #Alive before Alone and Alone tanked because of it, thus the lawsuit whining about rights. I hope Netflix wins!
The Korean version (dubbed) is way better. Don't bother with the English version, it's not worth the time when you can watch the better version and skip wasting time on something subpar. How did they remake a zombie flick and somehow make it less interesting?
Wolf Pack (2023)
Written by a 5th Grader BAD!
I had high hopes seeing Sarah Michelle Gellar attached. Unfortunately the first episode took almost twice as long to watch because we had to keep stopping to discuss what ridiculous poo we just saw. Bad acting, fairly bad FX, bad casting, Really bad story- but worst of all just insanely, over the top, horribly bad writing! What a waste of a wonderful actress like Gellar. Unless a bunch of mom's allow their 10-12 year olds to watch this garbage I don't see much of an audience for such badly written tween wolf drama. All those 10 star reviews have got to be written by friends or family of the cast of this show, actual 10-12 year olds, or people who can identify with tweens. I don't think this show will last very long. It's just that BAD.
Letterkenny (2016)
Not Funny and Really Horrible Acting!
I guess you have to live in some small town in nowhere Canada to understand all the overused colloquialisms. Therefore if you don't live there it just isn't amusing in the slightest. I would say the acting is horrible, but I'm not sure if any real actors are working on this show. THAT'S how incredibly horrible the acting is! It seems like a bunch of people got together and made a show that's the equivalent of an inside joke, and they don't care who gets it because they think they're hilarious. Pssst... it's no secret.... They are not. It is honestly just too annoying and unfunny to waste another second on. I couldn't make it through the first show because it really is that bad. I'm guessing anyone who likes it has a case of the Emperor's New Clothes syndrome- or they think if they say they like it people will think they are cool. Waste of time!
Nope (2022)
Mumbling Dialogue
No idea what really went on in this movie because the audio and mumbling dialogue delivered by the actors was so horrible, I basically guessed by visuals. No idea why movie creators would choose to make their audio so bad and dialogue so difficult to understand. Seemed like a meandering story, and it was surprising how this wasn't just sent right to a low level streaming service.
I am thinking that Peele admires Christopher Nolan by the muffled audio, especially when characters are in a helmet or mask. Seems like a lot of money was spent on nothing much. Very disappointing film to say the least.
We're All Going to the World's Fair (2021)
Boring Garbage
The story and dialogue were pitiful to begin with, then top it off with crap visuals and you've got a total garbage fest. How did this crap get made? I couldn't even finish it and fast forwarded to see if there was anything interesting, then kinda watched the ending- horrible garbage. Don't bother with this trash unless you enjoy just wasting time watching a steaming pile of poo get hard and crusty in your backyard, thanks to the neighbor's giant Rottweiler. Now since I have almost used up the required amount of characters I will say one last time that this is a boring piece of garbage that you should avoid.
Melancholia (2011)
Worst Artsy Fartsy Bullcrap Snoozefest
Wow! If I ever see anything with Lars von Trier's name attached, I will know to immediately avoid it! His writing and directing are overly pretentious, egomaniacal, boring, bullcrap. How do his movies even get made? And the fact that people praise his work just looks like a sad imitation of "The Emperor's New Clothes", where people try to impress someone by saying "Oh you just don't get it". Pffft. He's not that deep, he just makes dumpster fire after dumpster fire while patting himself on the back and arrogantly looking down on the masses. His writing and dialogue are HORRIBLE. He tries to make hidden and deep meanings and just comes off as overly pretentious incoherent babbling- meaningless drivel for art's sake. His directing, somehow even more HORRIBLE. Really? An entire movie done in shaky-cam? GARBAGE! I hate art films! Especially this type of crap that loves itself way too much!
Ascendant (2021)
Worst of all the "Trapped in an Elevator" movies
Bravo to the trailer editors for tricking me into watching this garbage! Great job on making the trailer actually look like something interesting when the reality was far from it. I also blame myself for patiently waiting for something to happen when my instinct told me "Get out now! You know nothing is gonna happen when this chick is still stuck in the elevator even though the movie is more than half over!" I didn't listen. And what a waste of time. Wow, nothing actually happened... nothing. This movie basically sucks.
Scream (2022)
Continuity doesn't exist in this world
So many continuity errors it makes this film ridiculously unwatchable. Bad choices by characters, badly written with lazy story telling. Overall an extremely stupid movie, that was painful to watch.
Fear Street: 1994 (2021)
Unwatchable Way Too Dark!
I only lasted 15 minutes before it became too frustrating to actually try to see what was happening in the movie. No it's not my TV. This movie is just really bad as far as brightness or contrast or even making it remotely watchable. Seemed like it might have been good, but I will never know.
The Deep House (2021)
Cool Idea Made Terribly Dull
They had a good idea, but never really came up with anything interesting to do with it. Too bad they couldn't actually come up with a script for their idea, as it just seemed to turn into another "looking in an abandoned house with a camera" movie. No true scares, nothing interesting, and even the "ghosts" were dull. Just a big yawn fest where the heavy breathing and screaming became annoying very quickly. An extra star because they filmed underwater.
Ghostbusters (2016)
Just Freakin Awful
I heard some of the female stars whining and complaining that people didn't like this film because it's an all female cast of leads and the people watching are just a bunch of misogynistic a-holes. Well, as a female, who enjoys powerful, intelligent female leads, I was hopeful, but quickly realized this movie was indeed a floating piece of crap. Just Awful! The attempt to remake such a beloved classic and try to "wake" it up was such an incredible fail. It wasn't funny, acting was subpar from these talented women, and the somehow messed up the story enough to make it fairly unwatchable. Also, I can't believe Chris Hemsworth agreed to do such a stupid and demeaning role... sickening.
Gretel & Hansel (2020)
Good Idea- Very Poor Execution
This movie had potential but failed quickly. It was so boring and lacking in so many ways, that it made it difficult to watch. I'm so glad I didn't pay to watch this. There's not much to say other than if you can't sleep you could watch Gretel and Hansel instead of taking a sleeping pill. Dull, dull, dull.
The Personal History of David Copperfield (2019)
Stick with the Book. This is Sad Poo!
I was so looking forward to Dev Patel in this movie, but unfortunately even he couldn't save this Copperfield knock off. It's all over the place and overacted at best. They shouldn't even mention it has anything to do with a Charles Dickens book, it was that different. I will stick with the book.
Girl (2020)
Horrible writing, directing and acting!
This movie is sooooo bad! Obviously the writer, director and actor of this film- all the same person- was on some kind of vanity trip, wanting to have deep meaning and symbolism, but totally failed. I've seen pretentious student films that were slightly better.
The music was annoying, the acting was crap (except some of Mickey Rourke and Bella Thorne's), the directing was crap- bad choices, blurry scenes, just bad. The dialogue was so incredibly bad that it became too difficult to finish this total crapfest. Everyone watching was booing and begging me to shut it off after 10 minutes but I held out another 5. I ended up fast forwarding, only stopping when something looked interesting- which wasn't much at all, because it wasn't.
Too torturous to actually finish watching, I say avoid wasting time on this "film". Definitely NOT worth a watch. Can I just mention one last time how insanely BAD the writing and dialogue is... seriously- It's the WORST I've seen in a looong time!
AVOID THIS TOTAL CRAP MOVIE!
Snowpiercer (2013)
How the Heck did this Get Made?!
This has got to be the worst concept for a movie ever made! How the Eff did this get greenlighted?! Seriously it should have been laughed out of the first meeting. The Absolute Worst!
I actually just watched this- it was a Covid movie- when you take chances on potential Crap-fests. The idea seemed really stupid but I thought how bad can it really be. Oh it's bad, alright, but not for the actors, nor the sets and wardrobe, but for the entire concept- of a train actually staying on the tracks, in a new ice age, going around the world- without any incident for many years. That thing would have been off the tracks in a matter of weeks at most. Who has been clearing the tracks? No one, because apparently you die if you go outside. That's how cold it is. They don't run out of food? They don't run out of power, and despite the giant ice blockages, don't skip a beat on the tracks. Ugh, this is one of the most frustrating movies I have ever seen because every idea in this movie is the most ridiculous, over the top, non-sensical, insane concept ever conceived and unfathomably actually made by someone in Hollywood.
It's been a week and I still have after effects from this movie and randomly have to stop what I am doing to say "How The EF did this movie get made?!", and just ponder the stupidity. It's mind numbing! I actually hate the fact that this movie was somehow allowed to be made!
Possessor (2020)
Boring Failed Attempt at Scanners
I thought this might be a new version of Scanners by David Cronenberg but his son Brandon Cronenberg, did him no justice. This movie just stinks. He had a good concept, from his father's original movie, but in his attempt to improve the story he somehow made it more stupid and boring with less gore. He decided to go Boring artsy fartsy nonsense, rather than an homage to the original Scanners. What a waste of film and time.