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Reviews
The Wicker Man (2006)
Avoid!
THE WICKER MAN of the 70's was the cult film of the 20th century. It gripped audiences with its terrifying themes and golden cast, including Christopher Lee as the mysterious Lord Summerisle, who appears so kind and helpful... but is the stepping stone which leads the dumbfounded lead Edward Woodward to his appointment with the Wicker Man.
The 2006 remake is an awful step back from what the original film had in it. It's tacky and unbelievable as a film. The horror of the original was that it played with your mind by luring you into the possibility that the events of the film could happen... The American remake is just stupid, and the only thing that grips you is your hands around your neck as you try to strangle yourself just to get away from Cage's wooden acting.
As an American, I can fairly say that British classics have to be left alone. Avoid this nightmare at all costs... I recommend this only to the die-hard Wicker Man fans and the British, and that's only because it'll give them a chance to throw the heads back and laugh at what a joke Hollywood have made of their beloved British classic.
I salute you, British film makers! Hollywood have tried to better you and failed miserably.
Imperium: Augustus (2003)
The War of the Julio-Claudians
Let us paint the scene: The year is 12BC. The republic has been replaced with the imperial family, the rebels are gathering and the fight for the succession is on. Frankly, it is like THE WAR OF THE ROSES, Ancient Roman style! The side most are routing for is the current emperor Augustus, and Julia, his beautiful, clever and liberal daughter. They stand for rights for the plebs and responsibility of the nobles, rather then for them to lay around on their backsides in litters. The father and daughter are at war against the cunning, merciless and sly Livia Drusilla, who has a strong desire to see her own son, Tiberius, on the throne. A believe so strong that he should be the next man "worthy of the name Caesar" she even tries to sway her husband Augustus into it. He of course always says no.
This is the first point of greatness in this moderately made TV drama: Augustus is not a dolt like he is in I, CLAUDIUS, he is as he should have been: knowing, ruthless and in league with everyone. Augustus did know everything and wasn't at all as stupid as Robert Graves wanted us to believe he was. He knew how Livia's mind worked and knew how to take care of her. Despite all arguments from both parties, they don't really love one another, they are like friendly rivals who both want their children to become leader of some big corporation.
Of course the victims in the war against each other are Julia and Tiberius, who both hold the love or their father/mother, but have different ideas on how they'd rather spend their day. Augustus wants a baby-making, obedient daughter and mother-of-Roman-future in Julia. What Julia wants is to live up for a lot of lost living, marry Iullus Antonius and settle down nicely. Also, despite what Livia wants, Tiberius would be more content matching in the army, sleeping out in the open and throwing stones into the sea.
There are historical tidbits about his show you might want to know. For example, Marcus Agrippa and Julia are lacking three children in this show! They were baby-making machines in reality, having one child back to back with each other. Also, Julia was banished in 2 BC not 12 BC, and her sons died in different years, not the same year.
Nonetheless, I'd give it a watch if you want a bit of fun. It's long but certainly worth a rent-it or even buy-it cry. The DVD doesn't cost much, so give it a go.
Garasu no nô (1999)
A cute film to watch with your friends...
Okay, so if you're having a nice day and you don't want to watch a horror movie with your friends and you want your girlfriend to be putty in your hands, then rent this and show it to her.
I was lucky enough to get this from Japan before it came out in the UK with the box set. When I watched it, I really wanted to see it for it's Rikiya Otaka at the start. He played his part great in the movie as younger Yuuchi. He was cool the way he played it.
I think you should watch it if you want a sappy and good hearted romance with cute little kiddies in it and high young girl. One for the ladies, and one for us lads if we've got her on a date! Really cool, bye!