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Die'ced (2023)
It was not good, but I Kinda Liked it
People have said this was basically a cheap Terrified knock off. I get that comparison but I also don't think the Terrifier was so original as to completely avoid movies coming out after it from getting that treatment. The storyline is fine, albeit flawed, hilariously at times (i.e., the killer was accidentally released from the psych ward newscaster of a clerical error). The writing was pretty awful and the acting was the dane. The lead actress was actually decent, especially compared to everyone else. The technical aspects were pretty awful; scene transitions were often clunky, the shots seemed to change aspect ratio randomly but not by way of lense changing so much as bad DV editing resulting in people appearing smashed. Very weird. The most intolerable part though was the sound editing and rubbish. It just didn't make sense and was mixed poorly so it airways drew your attention away from the action. All that said, I found some enjoyment in this, especially for being so low budget. Same character and general "universe" but with the above issues addressed I would even say it's passable.
The Fall of the House of Usher (2023)
Not as great as they say but not as bad as they say
This is a relatively well done Gothic horror. There is, of course, the necessary inclusion of unrealistic diversity that makes no real sense and breaks all odds in terms of sexual preference included. However, I think the writing was more well done than the critics will let on in that it actually showed how these sexual preferences, which are held up as saintly nowadays, actually represent a depravity and emptiness with a drive to Fill It.
I would say this is fairly representative of the characters in general and, though it's obviously a commentary on the wealthy, which is made perfectly obvious in the final episode, it's done in such a way that really leaves no side without honest critique. And, in general, just tends to focus on human foibles more than partisan politics.
The one thing I will say is that things fall apart in the final episode. Although they had a generally good explanation for much that was going on, they didn't bother to explain anything about the haunting female character. Instead, the haunting character becomes a confused mess. Is she the devil? Is she the grim reaper? In some Instances she not only Is the instigator of evil, historically, but she also sings high praises for evil done, yet she also shows vengeance against a particular character for what she believed was excessive evil and sadness for her own murder of an innocent individual as though it was beyond her control and she regretted having to do it. So, is she evil? Is she good? Does she have free will to do as she pleases? Is she bound by something else? She laughs at the idea of a soul yet every aspect of her character and inclusion of the deceased in the script lend itself to a religious idiology and the presence of nothing else if not a soul. I would say that's part of the struggle with this script. The religious elements are strong throughout but then it's as though they attempted to deny them in that final episode and just end up with a character that makes no sense. So, overall, this is a very well done TV series with necessary political commentary included as per Netflix policy. But that's done so well, it doesn't really leave you feeling ruffled no matter what your political leanings are. Until the very final episode, and then it's relatively minor and more so just the fact that they slopped up the script. Either way, still a pretty decent show and better than most on Netflix now-a-days.
Riverdale (2017)
They are 14
These are supposed to be 14yo kids but they all clearly are adults and conduct themselves as such. How with them being 14 does it not raise alarm when the writers choose to focus on romantic relationships and sexuality? I get the actors are like 30 but isn't that like illegal to fantasize about as these writers clearly are? Like it's not creepy because some mysteries pop up or something? Like hey, here are a bunch of kids screwing each other but don't worry because.... mystery or something. Just super off-putting, weird and jarring. Also just not interesting but high production quality so 4 stars I guess.
Wreck (2022)
Not Horror
Okay, so the primary focus of the writers was to make everyone LGBT. Who knows what they were focusing on after that, they lost the plot. There was a much larger percentage of this show focused on relationships than horror. It had elements of mystery, then who-done-it, then the potential for a good slasher/torcher flick, but then it coalesced as a Marxist, upper class eating the lower class followed by warfare flick. The teaser of an ending lens itself to this becoming an action, adventure type deal. At no point did it ever settle into horror. There were comedic moments, albeit brief. Big Irish was the most likable character.
The Invitation (2022)
Hallmark Stole Twilight and then got kinda racist...
The movie quality is fine, some transitions were a bit clunky leaving you wondering how you got to that point, but it was overall well done technically. It was a better romance than it was a horror but, that's not what it billed itself as nor any I went, so that was annoying. Then if course because it's 2022 they made sure the main character and her friend frequently made racist comments about white people. This plus the entitled and arrogant millennial attitude left the main character unlikable. There were no real reaming qualities to make up for this mess.
Rent twilight, watch Hallmark and chat with a college student instead. Will save you money and give you the gist.
Nope (2022)
I Dunno
I wanna like peeles movies just because I love key and peele but they all fall flat to some degree. This movie wasn't really horror, it was convoluted, just king of a mess that didn't really manage to entertain along the way. I went in with pretty high expectations because all of the critic reviews talk about it like it's a revaluation. Never trust the critics, I guess.
The Forever Purge (2021)
Satyr?
It's truly difficult to differentiate between satyr and genuine commentary now a days. This is either poking fun at progressives or the writers are in fact progressive and made a documentary about their delusions for the world to see. Either way the writing is on the nose.
The Matrix Resurrections (2021)
Progressively Getting Worse
The movie is a bit ironic in that it pretends to be self aware and a bit arrogant in that it thinks it's a meta commentary on a trend it apparently considers itself above while unironically cashing in on that very thing: nostalgia, brand recognition and cash grabs. The original film was amazing while the second and third demonstrated a lack of depth in the ability to tell a story or explore new worlds in any meaningful way. This fourth installment seems more like a temper tantrum than a failure, though it certainly is that. An excellent way to view the matrix series for those who love the original is as a singular entry. 2, 3 and whatever this is need not apply.
There's Someone Inside Your House (2021)
Well...
They seemed to forget they were writing a slasher, instead drifting into an unaware, or maybe overly self aware, coming of age story in modern times. As a result I played 2048 which is a very simple yet addicting game which, despite being low tech and numbers based, kept my attention longer than this film.
American Horror Story: Take Me to Your Leader (2021)
Starts Good, Immediately Crashes and Burns
Started with a good tone, good actors and interesting story line, but then moves on to uninteresting characters played by bad actors in a plot that's as boring and slow as could be. Good old bait and switch.
Antichrist (2009)
Swing and a miss...
This movie failed on multiple levels. It was pretentious, poorly developed and relied solely on shocking imagery(although even there it was meh).I enjoy at piece horrid films but this excelled as neither.
Chilling Adventures of Sabrina (2018)
This show had promise...
But instead the writers, who I assume are college liberals with degrees in gender studies, chose to be preachy about their left wing ideology to the extent that it detracted from the actual plot and diminished the enjoyment for anyone who is not a fellow college liberal...propaganda poisoned this show. Will no longer watch. Even if they removed the politics, Sabrina is a Mary Sue, interesting characters are never developed, interesting storylines are never explored (probably to give room for political ones), and many plots just disappear without explanation. Great potential wasted by arrogant writers.
Captain Marvel (2019)
No fizzle. No pop.
A forgettable movie that checks the generic boxes. Seems like a money grab more than a story that needed to be told.
The Ben Shapiro Show (2015)
Articulate, principled, factual, and entertaining!
Ben shapiro provides wonderfully articulated commentary, carefully intermingling fact with conservative analysis but in no uncertain terms so as to separate fact from opinion. Throw in sharp witted intellect and Ben's particular brand of humor and you have an entertaining informative political podcast that works for the high school conservative and retirement conservative alike. Also not a bad place for the own moderate or curious left winger who wishes to hear actual conservative takes.
Full Frontal with Samantha Bee (2016)
This is what happens when "comedy" is fueled by hate...
There are no actual jokes in the show. Regardless of political leanings, if you're watching this show hoping to be entertained you will most likely be left wanting. Her comedy solely consist of saying she just likes everything Republicans do and her big hoorah is saying Trump is bad. She fails as a political commentator and it doesn't even squeak by as identifying as a comedian.
Campus PD (2009)
Great Show
If you are the spoiled, poorly educated individual who thinks you know the law better than the police than you may find this show disappointing. Watching all of the obnoxious people these fine individuals have to put up with everyday while hearing comments from ignorant individuals who have no idea what it's like being in their shoes everyday makes me not envious of these officers to say the least. Having said that this is a major downside of the show; as interesting as it is the college students they feature are often spoiled brats who have a poor grasp of the law to say the least and can often be more irritating than entertaining.
Immortals (2011)
300,,, but better!
This film is excellent; well choreographed, interesting plot, surreal scenery. If you enjoy the type of film that has you on the edge of your seat, goosebumps covering your body and adrenaline pumping through your veins than this is the film for you. I've never been much for these types of films to be quite honest, but there is something about the way these films were done (300, Immortals) that has me completely hooked. You finish this movie feeling like you are ready for battle. They make sure to make every detail incredible; you will never be so pumped to watch somebody stand up (Zeus). I feel every aspect of this film is well done, from the color scheme to the soundtrack it was made for glory.
xXx (2002)
Classic
I am going to make this review extremely short and simple for those of you, who much like myself, check to see if it's worth watching or not.
A. If you like: Pitch black, Chronicles of Riddick, The Fast and the Furious etc. you will love this film.
B. If you like classic action story lines you will love this film.
C. If you like the bad guy persona willing to help the good guys and more than capable of doing so you'll love this film.
D. If you love Vin Diesel, you'll love this film.
E. If you love hacky sack, you'll love this film.
F. If you love action, just watch it, if you do not like it, you are a snob, if you do like, it worked, congrats.