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American Dad! (2005)
Decided to give this show a chance. Glad I did!
I'm a big fan of Family Guy, but for some reason I was never that interested in watching American Dad. I tried The Cleveland Show, to much my dismay it was awful, so for a long while I just assumed that American Dad was probably terrible as well.
A couple of months ago I was staying up late watching Adult Swim. After King of the Hill had come and gone I decided to finally watch an American Dad episode. I was intrigued right away, its humor was fresh and entertaining. In many ways the show is a rip off of Family Guy. You have Stan, the oafish father figure, Francine the hot MILF, Steve the nerdy son, Haley the left wing liberal, Klaus the unappreciated one. The only one's who don't really share anything are Roger and Stewie, with Stewie being an evil mastermind who question's his own sexuality and Roger being a drunk with multiple persona's.
Stan = Peter Francine = Lois Steve = Chris Haley = Brian Klaus = Meg
Despite the fact that it is somewhat of a rip on Family Guy I still find the show enjoyable and entertaining. I now it watch it regularly on Adult Swim along with King of the Hill and Family Guy. One thing I really like about American Dad is the utter lack of musicals. Family Guys (espeically early episodes) had long drawn out musicals which I've grown to despise. American dad also rarely has flashbacks, in most Family Guy episodes you can expect between 10 and 20 flashbacks as its part of the shows humor...American Dad does not do this.
All and all I give American Dad an 8/10 I find it enjoyable and fun to watch. I've made it a regular of mine now and so far have not been disappointed.
The Doors (1991)
Good entertainment for doors fans. But should not be considered a biopic.
First of all let me state that I am a HUGE fan of Jim Morrison and The Doors. I have read 5 biography's on Morrison himself, so when I watched this movie for the first time I compared it based off of the pre determined knowledge I gathered of Jim.
With that said, let me state that this movie though entertaining and enjoyable should not be taken seriously as a Doors/Morrison biopic. The movie generally portrays only the bad side of Jim Morrison. The drunken babbling leather clad womanizer. However, show's very little of the sensitive, caring, intelligent poetic Morrison. If one were to watch this movie not knowing who Jim Morrison was they would probably walk away with the impression that he was the biggest asshole to ever walk the face of the earth. The movie spans from a time shortly before The Doors were conceived in 1966 all the way to Jim Morrison's untimely death on July 3rd 1971.
The best things about this movie is the awesome soundtrack and Val Kilmers performance as Morrison was quite good. Kilmer himself did 90% of the singing for this movie and at times sounds quite close to Morrison's voice.
With that said though this movie seems to be mostly Oliver Stones take on who he thought Jim Morrison was, and in his mind how The Doors were conceived. Though I don't think Oliver Stone made this movie with the intention of making Morrison look bad, he kind of did in nonchalant way.
If you're like me and a fan of The Doors you'll probably either feel one of two ways about this movie...Either you will watch it and think that Oliver Stone was a total asshole to malportraying Jim Morrison and The Doors...Or you will be like me, and enjoying for being the semi fictional semi none fictional movie it is.
If you are new to Jim Morrison and The Doors...DO NOT...I repeat DO NOT take this movie as fact. Much of the movie is Hollywood fiction and there is A lot of things left out about who The Doors were and how they started one of the greatest American rock/blues groups of the 1960s.
The Hunger Games (2012)
Predictable and unexciting.
Let me start of this review by saying that I have never read The Hunger Games book. That may to some of you discredit what I have to say here, but please read with an open mind.
First of all, I only went to see this movie because of the MASSIVE amount of hype its garnered. When I initially saw the preview's to it a few months ago, it did not seem like anything special or something that I personally would I particularly would care to go see. However, I was offered a chance to go see it (Free of charge) here recently so I took up the offer in hopes that I might be pleasantly surprised. Needless to say...I wasn't.
In short the Hunger Games is about a girl named Katniss Everdeen and her trials surviving the Hunger Games, which is in itself kind of like televised modern day gladiators. Katniss selflessly volunteers to participate in the games when her much younger more innocent little sister is randomly selected to represent their district.
There wasn't very much I cared for in the movie itself. The first half of the movie is spent basically building up to the game itself, showing little tidbits of training and preparation but nothing really exciting. The second half of the movie is mostly just Katness hiding from other competitors waiting for them to pick each other off (Which in reality would be the smart thing to do)...However it makes for a relatively dull movie. The actions sequences in the movie are few and far between, and only mildly exciting when they do occur.
The thing that really bothered me about the movie though was the predictability of it all. For example...(MAJOR SPOILER AHEAD)... Katniss and the boy selected to compete alongside her in the games (Peeta Mellark) create a faulty love interest with other in order to gain sponsorship during the games. Which apparently having good sponsorship really helps your odds of winning. Anyway, in order to create suspense the proprietors of the games change the rules which originally stated that there can only be one winner of the games changed to their can be one winning district (two individuals) to win. Of course they go back on their word at the end and expect Katness and Peeta to kill each other; however their plans are thwarted when Peeta and Katness enter into an apparent suicide pact after which they allow them both to live.
To me...That was just a total cop out...I would have been much more impressed (And would have raised my IMDb score a few points) had Peeta and Katniss brutally fought it out to the death at the end of the movie.
Either way, I refuse to rank this movie any higher than 4/10. It was mildly enjoyable at times, but painfully uninteresting at others.
Perhaps if you're a fan of the books then this might be a better watch for you...But speaking from the standpoint of an outsider who had never even heard of the books or the movie until a few months ago...I can wholeheartedly say I was deeply unimpressed.
Max & Ruby (2002)
I believe this show is giving my 2 year old nephew the wrong idea.
So my 2 and a half year old nephew LOVE's Max and Ruby. Normally I pay no attention to show however the other day I sat down and watched a few episodes with him and realized how this show misleads kids.
For the past year or so my nephew has had a growing problem with authority. When he doesn't get his way he screams at the top of his lungs and/or cries uncontrollably. Here lately he has even resorted to hitting and biting authority figures when they tell him no. After watching a few episodes of Max and Ruby, I think I have an idea of whats culminating this type of behavior.
Max and Ruby generally follows the title characters, Max a 3ish year old bunny and his older sister Ruby who might be 8 or so. In generally every episode I've noticed that it revolves around Max wanting something and Ruby telling him no. Eventually though Max winds up getting his way and getting whatever it is he originally wanted and everyone live's happily ever after. Basically Max is rewarded for misbehaving.
Perhaps its just me...I'm not a parent myself so I'm not really sure what to think here. But in short...I think this show is giving children the wrong idea. I believe that this show is teaching kids...(Or at least my nephew)... That its OK to persist in getting your way even if an authority figure tells you its not. My nephew has on occasion attempted something dangerous which required myself or another adult to save him because he persisted to get his way despite being told NO.
All and all with that said, I can't say much else except I think this show is bad overall...Even from an entertainment standpoint. I can still comfortably sit down and watch cartoons from the late 1980's to early 1990s' (When I was a kid) and get totally enticed in them. However, like most cartoons on T.V today, I find Max and Ruby to be a total bore, and even if I were a kid I'm almost certain that I would have no interest in this show.
My advice? Keep your kids away from this boring bad influence cartoon, and let them watch something real like Tom and Jerry or the Looney Toons.
SpongeBob SquarePants (1999)
One of the last good Cartoons left.
Maybe i'm biased...Hell I know I am...I'm 23 years old and grew up in a totally different era of Cartoon entertainment, and that era was the 1990's. A time when Cartoons were worth getting out of bed early on a Saturday morning to watch.
I've tried on several occasions to sit down and watch one of the newer Cartoons that on Nick or Cartoon Network, and so far nothing has been able to revive that wonderful feeling I had as a kid. I admit I still watch Spongebob on a semi regular basis, I find the show entertaining despite its quality decline over recent years.
Spongebob was created in 1999...The end of a era for many things...Cartoons included. When I sit down and watch Spongebob I can feel that little flicker of whats left of my inner child somewhere deep inside me get excited. Spongebob has become a throwback for me, a nostalgic form of entertainment. Funny thing is, I wasn't terribly fond of the show when it first came out in 1999...It wasn't until a few years later that I actually started watching it. Spongebob is about an annoying Yellow Sponge that live's in a pineapple under the sea...His best friends are a borderline retarded Starfish, and Southern genius Squrrial, and a snooty uptight Squid (whome actually hates Spongebob).
Spongebob may not be the best Cartoon ever or what it once was...But it is in my opinion the best Cartoon left on daytime television. I've come to accept the sad reality that when Spongebob is eventually taken off the airways I will no longer have a reason to visit Nickaloaden anymore. Cartoon Network sailed its ship for me years ago...And it was my main channel as a child.
But in the end there will always be Boomarang!
Family Guy (1999)
Overall very funny...But not without flaw.
Family guy is about the Griffin family, which consists of Peter, the idiotic but generally well intentioned father figure. Lois, the sexy and sometimes abusive yet most level headed house wife. Brian, the intellectual self-loathing dog of the Griffins. Stewie, the once evil hell bent on world domination baby later turned gay. Meg, the well-intentioned but black sheep daughter of Peter and Lois. Chris, the under educated but spirited son of Peter and Lois.
Much of Family Guy is based on the shenanigans of Peter and the grief they cause his family and friends, though often times his family and friends are involved in his shenanigans.
Family Guy more often than not goes' for offensive humor, often times making light of very serious situations such as Rape and Murder. This is in fact to offensive for some, but I personally find most of it rather funny, because it is in fact just a cartoon.
Something I must complain about though, is some of the long running gags...For example, the Conway Twitty bits...For those of you who may not have had the misfortune of encountering an episode which uses a Conway Twitty bit, this is how it goes...Peter finds himself in a situation in which he needs a temporary distraction, he then says...Ladies and Gentlemen Mr. Conway Twitty! and from there the scene cuts to an old video clip of Conway Twitty performing a song. This would be bearable if it only lasted 10 seconds or so...But these bits often times can last between 5 and 10 minutes. When you factor in that the with commercials removed each episode is only about 22 minutes long, that's almost half an episode dedicated to Conway Twitty. I watch Family Guy to laugh at the Griffin family and all of their misfortune. Not to watch old Conway Twitty performance's...
Another thing I feel the need to nitpick is the musicals. Family Guy has had extravagant drawn out musical bits since the shows conception, and I personally have NEVER liked them. To me they just don't add anything to the show. On a plus side though when a musical bit does arise, I take it a chance to get something to drink and/or go to the bathroom, in essence its like a mini commercial break for me.
The last thing I feel needs to be criticized about Family Guy is the pop culture references. Often times the show makes fun or reference's an actor or performer who I would be willing to be 90% of the show's audience doesn't even know who they are.
Anyway with my personal nitpicks aside I have to say that overall I still do enjoy Family Guy and generally I can still expect at least a couple of good hard laughs per episode. If you think Family Guy's humor is to offensive then you probably shouldn't be watching it anyway, remember...As I said earlier, this is a Cartoon sitcom, not real life. Family Guy has even made cracks at things I personally could have found offensive if I wanted to...But I just laughed at it.
If you have never seen a Family Guy episode before, watch it with an open mind and you will probably enjoy it.
King of the Hill (1997)
KOTH goes for something a little more ambitious.
King of the Hill is an animated sitcom based in the fictional town of Arlen Texas, closely named after ''Arlington Texas'', the name Arlen could be derivative as I can see how some people here in Texas might pronounce Arlington as Arlinton hence Arlen. I don't know, that's just speculation on my behalf. But anyway back on track...
This sitcom is about the Hill family which is initially Hank The patriotic conservative father figure, Peggy the overconfident substitute Spanish teacher, Bobby the under achiever overweight son of Hank and Peggy and to a lesser extent Luanne Platter the doting cute yet ignorant niece of Peggy Hill.
Unlike Family Guy or the Simpsons ''both of which I'm a fan of'' King of the Hill follows a different tune than those two. King of the hill or KOTH as I'll call it from now on, puts the hill family in real world situations with real world issues and it doesn't always go for the laugh factor, which has led to some criticism on the shows behalf as many people think if they are watching a cartoon and not laughing then they are watching a bad cartoon, which is not true. For example, I remember one episode which the whole premise of it was Hank fighting against a new law that only allowed people to have ''low flow'' toilets in their house. The whole episode is about Hank fighting this new law and eventually winning in the end. But as boring as that might sound Mike Judge somehow makes it interesting.
After season 6 Mike Judge's involvement in the series started to wean out some...This led to less interesting stories, ''Though I personally still enjoyed the show. After seasons 6 though many episodes sort of became the same thing, which was...Hank and/or Hanks friends/family get into some trouble and Hank has to set things right. Overall the episodes seemed less creative though still entertaining for the most part.
I was sad when this show was canceled for crap like The Cleveland Show.
8/10 overall score.
Paul Blart: Mall Cop (2009)
Review of Mall Cop by a Mall Cop!
My names Nathan and I currently work as a Mall Cop, or Mall Security Officer as those a little more sensitive about their job description than myself would rather be called.
First of all let me kick of this review by saying...No us Mall Cops do not get on our Segway's and ride to work every morning on them.
With that said this movie is about Paul Blart,(Kevin James) who is you're typical bumbling underdog. Thought I really like Kevin James, I feel bad as though it seems he is generally typecast for these kinds of roles, much as Jim Carry was for comedy roles or Arnold Swarchenegger was for action roles.
Speaking as someone who currently works in this particular field I can say that this movie does in fact nail some of the stereotypes that go along with being a Mall Cop. At one scene in the movie Paul is doing his ''extra'' duty and one of his fellow employee's asks him why he can't just punch in and punch out like the rest of us? This holds true amongst a lot of us...At the mall I currently work at there are in fact some people who act as though because they put on a security uniform and have a badge that makes them cops undercover, which couldn't be further from the truth...A mall cop is a citizen in uniform hired under contract to protect private property in which the mall is located on, and since I work with these people on a daily basis it gives an added sense of humor when I see Paul Blart doing his thing. The only difference between Mr. Blart and the some of the wannabe John McClain's I work with is that the guys I work with would never do what Paul Blart did in this movie. Keep in mind I'm not bashing the field of Security work as there is actually a lot more to it than this movie lets on. But not as much as some would have you believe, which brings me to my next point.
This movie is funny for the most part...But it also acts as sort of a back hand to anyone working mall security...It compliments them by making the title character Paul Blart brave and having a good sense right and wrong, but at the same time it slaps the job itself in the fact by making him the underdog and bumbling dork that he is.
Overall the story is pretty typical...Paul is working Mall security only while he trains to become a Police Officer on the local Police Force, in which he has had a few failed attempts at. There is also a love interest which is in danger of falling in the arms of another man. And then of course there is Paul's rival ''SPOILER AHEAD'' Which is a S.W.A.T team officer named Kent who is called in when its made public that the mall has been overtaken by criminals. Commander Kent, is more than just a S.W.A.T team officer though as he is actually working with the criminal's in the mall.
Overall the movie move's along pretty good, though it does rely on a lot of ''fall humor'' which can be funny at times, but when overused it can also get a little annoying. The acrobats ''or whatever they were'' cast to play the villains in this movie do a pretty good job of being believable bad guys. The story can be a little sappy at times, but for the most part its excusable.
Overall this is a decent laugh movie, especially if you currently work as or in the have in past worked as Mall Security.
The Thing (2011)
A really good movie ''Rare for Hollywood these days''
To be blunt, at least 70% of the new movies I see from Hollywood today are either total crap or only mildly entertaining. The Thing 2011 is a breath of fresh air from the normal dredge that is modern Hollywood productions.
Now being a HUGE fan of John Carpenters 1982 The Thing, I was hugely skeptical about this new prequel. My skepticism was soon put to rest though. This movie follows the events that take place at the Norwegian camp only a couple of days before the events that take place at the American research outpost in which the 1982 The Thing took place. This new movie follows Kate Lloyd a young paleontologist who is asked to come do research on a new finding in Anartica.
I won't spoil much about the movie for you...But I will say this, I only found two things to nit-pick about it.
#1 - Was the CGI...Yes CGI was expected as its all Hollywood uses for their effects anymore. But it was something about those gooey grotesque looking animatronics from the 1982 film that really gave a sense of horror. Sometimes in this move the CGI effects are a little more noticeable than they should be, but for the most part quick camera work during these action sequence's keep it from being to obvious.
#2 - The Things behavior...In the 1982 film, The Thing only came out of hiding when it had no other choice. For the most part it seemed to want to be left alone so it could quietly and methodically take over every human at the American camp in private...The Thing portrayed in the new movie is very aggressive, It seems less afraid to show itself publicly and often times attacks people in situations where the old monster would never have come out.
Overall this is a good movie, a rarity amongst what I've become accustomed to from Hollywood these days. I plan to own this one when goes out on DVD. If you're a fan of the 1982 The Thing, this is worth a watch...There will be some things about it that will probably bug you, but you should find it overall interesting and worth a movie ticket price.
Jurassic Park III (2001)
Doesn't quite live up to the legend that is Jurassic Park.
Once again Dr. Alan Grant (Sam Neill) finds himself on an remote island running for his life from rabid dinosaurs.
First off let talk about what irks me about this movie...
There is a lot of plot holes...I'm just going to leave that one at that. This whole, lets bring a new dinosaur in and replace the old ''king of the jungle'' dinosaur with it idea didn't work to well. The new dinosaur is the Spinosaures which early in the movie gets into an altercation with the old Jurassic Park sponsor ''T-Rex'' and after a brief fight the Spinosaures snaps the neck of the T-Rex and is the new king of the jungle. But even that can be forgiven had it not been for heartwarming loving family scenes in the movie. They just come off cheesy.
Example...
Eric meets up with his parents ''whom tricked Dr. Grant and his assistant into bringing them to the island''. Anyway when Eric first meets up with his parents they play this overly gushy orchestrated music, the whole scene just comes off as cheesy and embarrassing. And again we are confronted with more family oriented cheese when later that night Eric and his mother and father are sitting in a tree, His father ''Paul Kirby - William H. Macy'' precedes to tell us a story about a fishing trip go awry in which the tow truck driver who had to tow Paul's car and boat out of the boat launch gets angry when his tow truck is pulled in as well and ''threatens to punch his lights out''...It wasn't funny and it totally takes away from what Jurassic Park is supposed to be IMO.
Another annoyance of mine is the character Billy...Billy serves as Dr. Grant's trainee basically. A young ambitious paleontologist. Billy does something really stupid halfway through the movie ''Steals Raptor Eggs'' which in turn leads the ever lethal Raptors to pursue them across the island. Dr. Grant doesn't learn of this until later. After a brief confrontation with the Teredactycals in the aviary scene Billy uses a ripped parachute to save Eric from certain death, After which the Teredactycals turn their hostility to Billy, he is last seen being pecked to death as he floats down the river. Billy SHOULD have died in this scene, if anything for dramatic effect. But instead he shows up alive and well at the end of the movie...Well battered from his encounter...But alive none the less.
What else...Let's see...I love Sam Neill, the name is a great actor and I really loved him as Dr. Grant in JP1. But in JP3 he was given some...Goofy dialog. Example...During one scene they are being attacked by Raptors...Grant and his gang get the upper hand on one of the Raptors and get it stuck behind a huge iron door that encloses a cage...The Raptor shrills and makes these weird chirping noises...Grant responds to this with...''My god! He's calling for help!''...How do you know that? I mean I know that paleontologist generally know more about dinosaur behavior than anyone else...But come on...And another scene, when one of the Raptors circles their group in the jungle, Grant advises that everyone get down because he's challenging us.
Jurassic Park III provides some entertainment...But it just doesn't live up to what it could have been.
6/10 stars.
Urban Cowboy (1980)
A good movie worth watching.
Urban Cowboy is about Bud Davis ala John Travolta and Sissy aka Debra Winger. Two southerners who meet up and share a night of passion in the infamous Gilles bar.
Bud is an old fashioned blue collar working man. Bud was obviously raised with a set of ideals much older than himself. Bud is a nice guy, but a little cocky and hard headed and he does believe men to be stronger of the two sexes. It seems to bother him to no end when his girlfriend ''Later Wife'' Sissy does things that ''only a man should do'' like drive his truck and ride that mechanical bull at Gilles. This set of ideals eventually pushes Sissy away and into the arms of another man...Wes Hightower ''Scott Glenn'' Wes is a muscled up ex convict who acts as a third party to the love triangle between Bud and Sissy. One night while not in the best of mood Bud picks a fight with Wes, Bud being quite drunk takes a quick beating in the parking lot of Gilles, Later Wes injures Bud even further when the two of them get into a peeing match with the mechanical bull ''Which Wes is controlling''. Wes is also working on a scheme in which he plans to rob Gillies.
Eventually things work out for the better...Bud and Sissy re-unite after Bud apologizes for his behavior, only to realize moments into their conversation that Sissy has been subjected to physical abuse from Wes...Bud loses his cool and attacks Wes inside of Gillies, This time Fueled by pure rage Bud beats up Wes pretty badly. Wes had been hiding the recently stolen cash from Gillies. Bud exposes this when he attacks him.
Overall its a good movie worth watching 9/10
Dumb and Dumber (1994)
So dumb its funny!
Dumb and Dumber is about two lower class under educated buddies who decide to embark on a cross country trip.
The movie is about Lloyd Christmas and Harry Dunne, both of which are under achieving low IQ morons for lack of better terminology. In short...Lloyd drives a limo ''rather poorly'' and this is his job. The movie starts with him shuttling the beautiful Mary Swanson to the airport. Upon seeing Mary for the first time Lloyd decided that it can only be love at first sight, which leads to some uncomfortable small talk on the way to the airport. Upon arriving to the airport Lloyd watches as his ''dream girl'' walks away and out of his life, as he is watching her leave the terminal he is also still moving forward in his Limo, this leads to a minor accident which causes Lloyd to realize that Mary has left her briefcase in the terminal. Lloyd takes this as a chance to pursue Mary halfway across the country. Lloyd enlists Harry, his dog grooming friend and the ''slightly'' more sensible of the two, to drive him across the country.
Overall Dumb and Dumber is a good flick for those that have the right sense of humor. Dumb and Dumber is very low brow humor. If that's not you're thing then you probably won't like this movie. Dumb and Dumber has a lot of things in it...From homicidal hillbilly truckers, to an almost gruesome rape scene in a truck stop bathroom, to an unfolding kidnapping murder case, most of which sounds pretty serious, but somehow this movie manages to make light of all of it.
I really enjoyed Dumb and Dumber, Back then and currently.
Arthur (2011)
Not worth an academy award...But not terrible.
Arthur ''Russell Brand'' is about the title character Arthur Bach. Arthur is a 40ish alcoholic ultra-rich playboy who lives' by no one's rules but his own. Arthur may be a 40 year old man on the exterior, but underneath he's an insolent 13 year old at best. His wealth was not earned but he none the less has access to seemingly unlimited funds via his family's business.
After Arthurs shenanigans get to much publicity for the family business his mother gives him the ultimatum of either marrying a rude woman who only wants a stake in his family's business. Or simply being thrown out on his butt with no more wealth. The choice to be made is a long and hard one...Which is only made even harder when Arthur meets Naomi, a cute lower middle class girl who works as an unlicensed tour guide. Arthur falls head over heels for her and goes about making a relationship with her...Only to later have it ruined.
...Anyway...I don't want to describe the whole movie here for you...But that's the premise. Arthur is a good watch, Its not great and many will argue it doesn't do the original justice...But it is entertaining and worthy of a few good laughs. Don't cut this movie short just because someone on the internet says it's not as good as it should be. Give it a chance. It's an alright comedy.
The Terminator (1984)
Super Action Sci/Fy Thriller....But also the most romantic love story of the 20th century?
I was once asked while on a date with a girl...What I thought the most romantic movie of the 20th century was. I paused, thought about it for a minute as I wanted to give a genuine answer. And ultimately I concluded that it was The Terminator, and this is why...
(MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD) The Terminator tells a story of a man who travels across the endless wake of time on a whim to battle against an unstoppable cyborg and protect a girl whom he only knows by the old faded picture he was given of her. Ultimately the unsung hero of this movie is a man named Kyle Reese, Kyle was raised in the aftermath of a nuclear war against the most advanced computer ever created by man, all of which took place prior to his conception. He is a man who knows nothing but war as this become radially apparent throughout his character development.
Sara Conner is the woman he is sent to save. The reason she has been marked for death is because unbeknownst to her she is the future mother of the man who leads us to destroy the machines and win the war against them man years in the future. Kyle is tasked with traveling 45 years back in time to 1984 to save Sara Conner from an extremely hostile cyborg assassin. Ultimately this movie takes place over only a weekend, but during this weekend many things happen, from a nightclub gun battle between our hero and the cyborg to a police station massacre at the hands of The Terminator, To the ever sentimental night of lovemaking spent together by Kyle and Sara, and a final battle between Kyle and The Terminator in an Industrial Warehouse, in which our hero Kyle Reese is sadly killed by either shrapnel to the face or a broken neck either of which could have been received during a last ditch effort to kill The Terminator by use of a homemade pipe bomb.
Some people might laugh at the idea of The Terminator as a romance movie...But to me couldn't be more obvious. Man travels through time to save woman AND conceive the future savior of the world with. And ultimately give his life to protect the one he has fallen in love with.
In a delightful moment at the end of the movie...A young hispanic boy snaps a quick photograph of Sara Conner as she sitting in her Jeep at a gas station. Upon looking at the picture taken of her we see that it is the picture Kyle will ultimately end up with in the future. In an earlier reference in the movie Kyle says that he always wondered what Sara was thinking about when that picture of her was taken...Ironically she was thinking about Kyle.
10/10...Movie's don't get much better than this.
Avatar (2009)
After over a decade this is it?
OK first of all let me state...James Camron has made some of the best movies of the 20th century in my opinion. Aliens, The Terminator 1 and 2 Titanic, all of which are great movies. So I'm not here to bash Camron or his work. But I was less than impressed with Avatar.
Perhaps the over hyping of this movie made me watch it with higher expectations that I should have had. Perhaps impossible expectations. But none the less. One thing about this movie that irked me right away was the recycled sound effects...A movie of this SIZE and SCALE used recycled sound effects? Many of the animals encountered in this movie sound exactly like the dinosaurs from Jurassic Park. The animation of everything was good...But it didn't blow me away like I hoped it would.
Now the bad...
The story...So unoriginal I almost couldn't stand it. It has this overwhelming ''save the earth'' message to it which I would rather not have crammed down my throat. It also reminds us that we ''Human beings'' are the aids of planet slowly and methodically killing the earth. Story alone gets a 2/10 score for me.
Overall I can't rate this movie any higher than 5/10. I wish that I could. But I just wasn't as impressed by at is I felt I should have been.
The Cleveland Show (2009)
Bring back King of the Hill.
Alright...Were to start.
I admit
I watched this show for the first time with a major chip on my shoulder. That chip was that this show is directly responsible for the cancellation of King of the Hill. Now don't get me wrong
I'm an avid fan of Family Guy but this is just bad. My question is why does Cleveland Brown
The most uninteresting slow witted character from Family Guy get his own show? I wondered this before I actually watched the pilot episode, I thought well perhaps it'll be explained maybe there's more to Mr. Brown than I've given him credit for
There's not. Cleveland Brown is the same old overweight, mostly humorless, not to bright character he is in Family Guy. I see no reason for this spin off to even exist. Sure in Family Guy Cleveland had moments were he said or did something kind of funny, but he's not the kind of character you build an entire sitcom around. He's a decent supporting character at times and that's it.
I have to admit
Seth Macfarlane's latest work has been a little bit of a disappointment. The Cleveland Show is the just a big icing on the cake. I think Seth should stop wasting time money and effort on The Cleveland Show and focus most of his assets towards renovating Family Guy. I would say go ahead knock American Dad out to while you're at it
But I know that show has a fan base of its own despite the fact that I don't personally enjoy it. There's really not much to say about this show that hasn't already been said
I think most people will find it boring and repetitive, We all know Seth goes for offensive outrageous humor any Family Guy fan knows and appreciates that about him
But most of The Cleveland Show's jokes are racially centered and way to stereotypical ''And that's coming from a white guy''.
My advice
Leave this stinker of a show to rot
It'll eventually be banished to DVD box set hell. Quite fitting considering that's were King of the Hill is now.
Buried (2010)
You might want to skip this one if you are ''Claustrophobic''
...But you would miss out on a truly suspenseful movie if you did that. Buried is a movie that takes place soley in a...You guessed it, cheap wooden coffen. This movie does a bang up job of conveying desperation and really give's you a sense of hopelessness that would be felt if it were you in this situation.
The movie starts with Paul Conroy (Ryan Reynolds) waking weary and confused in total darkness. Only to learn shortly thereafter that he has been taking hostage and buried alive in a wooden coffen. His unidentified kindapper has left his with a bag which contains a glowlight, a flashlight, and a cell phone. Paul must use his cell phone to make a ransome video of himself. And of course he uses it to phone out for help.
I won't spoil the ending for you. But I will say this, Its good. I really enjoyed this movie from start to finish. I know the idea of spending the entire movie inside of a coffen might seem like it would get boring. But as you go along to devolpe a true sense of wanting Paul to escape from this dire situation, It keeps the moving flowing very good.
I highly recommend this movie.
9/10
The Lost World: Jurassic Park (1997)
Not as bad as some say it is.
For one reason or another some people seem to have it out for this movie. The general reasoning seems to be that it's not as original as the first Jurassic Park movie, and that's the truth...But not a reason to warrant this as an awful movie. Lets start with what I think is good about it.
(The Good) Jeff Goldblume was born to play Ian Malcolm. Reading the Jurassic Park books I totally get a Jeff Goldblume vibe from the way Dr. Malcolm is portrayed in the books. Another good thing about this movie is that its chocked full of dinosaur action, T-Rex attacks Velocraptor's in the grass, Its got all in the way of deadly dinosaurs.
(The Bad) I've found that I prefer Jurassic Park to be set on an island...The whole city rampage thing didn't really work out for me. A lot of the characters are mixed and matched in this movie with characters from the book and that generally doesn't work out.
(My Thoughts) I feel there's a couple of things that need explanation here...In the book, There were initially seven main characters. Malcolm, Thorne, Eddie, Sara, Richard, Kelly, Arby. In the book Kelly was a 12 year old white girl and Arby was a 10 year old black boy. The Kelly in the movie the lost world, is a 12ish black girl...In essence they combined Kelly and Arby from the book into one character. I've actually heard this was their intent. In the book Thorne was sort of the unsung hero, He kind of took on the role in this book that Dr. Grant took on in the first book. Though oddly Thorne is absent from the movie release of The Lost World...Instead he's replaced by the Greenpeace hippie Nick Van Owen (AKA Vince Vaughn). Don't get me wrong I got nothing against Vince Vaughn...But Thorne or at least a Thorne like character seemed more appropriate for this application. Richard Levine makes a few appearances in the movie...In the book he was ''sided'' with the good guys who just wanted to observe. However in the movie he's sided with the ''bad guys'' who want strip mine the place and make a zoo out of the animals. In the book Levine survives the event's...Barely. In the movie, he's eaten by the Tyrannosaurs while still on the island.
All and all...this isn't a bad movie; though I didn't hate the San-Diego scene with the T-Rex...I have to admit it was a little goofy. Overall a good sequel to a great movie.
8/10
Mortal Kombat: Annihilation (1997)
Worst movie ever...Hands down.
There is no redeeming quality to this movie...Its just...Bad, plain and simple. The plot is bad, The acting is terrible, The fight scene's in this movie are among the worst I've ever seen in a Martial Arts movie. The first Mortal Kombat movie had well scripted and choreographed fights...This one relies on fancy camera work and has a whole ''Smoke and Mirrors'' vibe about the fights.
Simply put, this movie was made as nothing more than a cash cow, seeing as the first Mortal Kombat did better than expected both at the box office and with fans. They made this movie with no real intent to make it a worthy sequel. Literally within the first 5 minutes of the movie the much loved comic relief from the first movie ''Johnny Cage'' gets into an altercation with Sho-Kahn ''Evil Bad Guy'' in which Sho-Kahn gets the upper hand and after a few tense moments snaps Johnny Cage's neck effectively killing his character out of the movie. It makes no sense than Johnny Cage, The man who single handily defeated Scorpion and Goro ''Two very tough Mortal Kombat opponents'' in the first movie, is so feebly destroyed in the second movie.
The movie only goes down hill from there. The fights are stupid and Power Ranger Esq, the acting is sub-par...Even by bad acting standards. This film is also victim of a major cast overhaul...And not for the better. Most likely because the original cast read the pathetic script and said no way am I going to be in this piece of crap movie! And lets not forget the TERRIBLE CGI used in this movie...One of the downsides to the first MK movie was the weak CGI...But MKA takes weak CGI to a whole new level of bad.
Overall this movie was SO bad...I wish that I could go back in time to 1996 and save my mom the money it cost to buy two movie tickets for this crap movie AND save her from the offal boredom she must have felt sitting threw this embarrassingly bad piece of trash movie.
As far as I am concerned the story of Mortal Kombat ended with the first movie. MKA does not even exists to me.
Zookeeper (2011)
Mildly Entertaining.
I'm going to format this review as simple as possible.
(Summery) This movie is about Griffin Keys (Kevin James) an average Joe working as a zoo keeper who has a talent to connect well with the animals he cares for. The movie starts with Griffin being harshly rejected for marriage by his girlfriend. Fast forward five years and we have Griffin who's moved forward with his life and has all but forgotten the botched proposal...Long story short...Griffin's old girlfriend shows up at his brothers pre-marital celebration (Which for some reason is held at the Zoo) Griffin spots her and old feelings come back to haunt him, thus the animals decide to take matters into their own hands and give Griffin advice on how to win her back...Thus breaking their ''pact'' that prevented them from allowing humans to know they could speak.
(My Take) Though I like Kevin James, I didn't really enjoy this movie for a few reasons. First and for most its to predictable, I literally told myself in my head what was going to happen...Seconds before it happened. Of course the ending of the movie is predictable within the first 20 minutes. But all that was pretty much to be expected, I don't go to family movie's like this expecting to be blown away by some amazing unpredictable plot. Which brings me to my next complaint. The Plot. The Plot of this movie is so cookie cutter and basic its not even funny. In short...Guy has unfitting girlfriend and a very fitting friend ''Who wants to be more'' right under his nose, though he somehow fails to see it until its almost to late, but of course...He's not to late, He saves the day and gets the right girl at the end of the day. That's it. My advice...If you have kids who you think might be interested in this...Wait until it comes out on DVD and rent it. If you have kids that are just dying to see it, Go ahead and take them, The movies watchable but not likely to entertain to many adults.
PROS Has a few subtle funny moments. Heartwarming...If you're into that kinda thing. More Than a Feeling by Boston Featured at the end credits. Female actors are kinda cute. Geard for kids.
CONS Predictable Storyline/Plot. Not so great acting. Watching animals talk ALWAYS seems weird and corny. Not really worth the price of a movie ticket. More Than a Feeling by Boston Butchered by terrible singing animals at the end credits. Geard for kids.
(Final Thoughts) If you have kids who MUST see it and you MUST be present with them while they watch it...Its bearable. But I don't recommend going out and renting this movie to watch on you're own as an adult.
Jurassic Park (1993)
The ''Jaws'' of my generation.
Not many movies earn a 10/10 score for me. But Jurassic Park gets it...For me this movie nails everything. Based on the book written by Michael Crichton. Jurassic Park is about a man named John Hammond who does the impossible, he genetically engineers dinosaurs to serve as attractions in his upcoming amusement park Jurassic Park. But before Jurassic Park can open to the public it must be proved to be safe for visitors. John willingly invites the top minds of their respective fields of Paleontology, Mathematics Theory and Paleobotanist. But little known to John Hammond there is trouble brewing right under his very nose...And troubles name is Dennis Nedry the parks underpaid and disgruntled computer programmer who attempts to commit industrial espionage which sets off the chain of events that take place at Jurassic Park.
Jurassic Park scores so high for me because it is a truly high quality movie, from the wonderful script to the wonder actors that portrayed their characters as any fan of the book would expect. And the music...This musical score on this movie is worth its weight in gold. This movie also features some very early use of CGI and its actually done quite well, Even watching it today the CGI stands up good to the test of time.
Jurassic Park also features what I consider to be THE best animal attack scene ever filmed in the history of movies. ''Spoiler Ahead'' And that scene is when the Tyrannosaurus Rex breaks out of its containment paddock and attacks the visitors Safari Explores which are parked right next to the disable electric fence that once contained the T-Rex. There is no music in this scene, its filmed to portray the attack as if it were happening to you...And believe me it does well with that.
Many people die in Jurassic Park...Yet it remains relatively gore less. Which might not be a bad thing...Over goreing a movie just looks like you're trying to cover up bad scrip writing and acting. When people get killed in Jurassic Park the camera does not show you exactly what is going on, but lets you see just enough for you mind to make up its own picture of whats unfolding. A nice touch considering many movies today don't let you're mind work for itself. The Book however is quite gruesome in its death descriptions.
I honestly can't think of anything really wrong with this movie...If anything some of the dialog might come off a bit slow. The movie discusses some of the scientific aspects of how the dinosaurs were created and what have you...If you're not interested in this kind of thing, this might seem like a slow part in the movie for you. But overall this a movie I recommend to anyone and everyone. This is a must see for all movie buffs.
Mortal Kombat (1995)
One of the best theatrical renditions of a game.
The first Mortal Kombat movie sort of gets a bad rap...Some people find it cheesy and crude...Well...for the most part it is. But to me this is one of the best American made martial arts based movies. Let me start with what I think is good.
The fight scene's...The fight scene's in this movie are very well written and choreographed. The actors and stunt doubles did a great job of representing the respective martial arts displayed in this movie. One particular scene I want to point out ''Spoiler Ahead'' is Johnny Cage vs Scorpion...This was in my opinion the best fight scene in the entire movie...Surpassing even the final battle between Liu Kang and Shang Tsung. The Johnny Cage vs Scorpion fight which takes place about half way into the movie is a fight scene where the Music/Choreography and overall ambient feel come together to make this fight scene truly memorable. It really conveys how good both fighters are...Scorpion is a nearly impossible to hit specter and Johnny Cage is probably the best American Martial Artist in the movie...Both are portrayed very well in this scene.
Another notable mention in this movie is the humor, Some things in this movie are actually quite funny. Rayden played by (Christopher Lambert) is quite humorous. The musical score is also well done for this movie. The music is always involving and plays a rather large role in helping portray the fight scenes.
Downfalls? This movie is an early example of CGI technology. The CGI in this movie is quite obvious when it is used. CGI had already been done and done quite a bit better when this movie came out most notably by Jurassic Park. Thankfully though, all of the fighting was done by actors and stuntman. The CGI in this movie is pretty sparse and that's a good thing.
In closing, I think Mortal Kombat is a great action flick and one of the few case's in which a movie based off a game is actually done quite well. If you're a fan of the game series and not a stickler for things like overly noticeable CGI or a few cheesy lines, then you might enjoy this movie. I know that I enjoy watching it just as much today as I did when I was a 7 year old kid in 1995!