walkenlvsme Reviews

Embedded (2012)

Amateurish but, meh, alright. maybe. I guess.

[3/10 · 3 January 2022]

There are very specific types of movies I like watching while I'm on the treadmill, doing laundry, or dishes. Ones that aren't maddening in their awfulness, and not so great that it requires my full attention. Something just sort of ok. This is that kind of movie.

There was only one 'actor' to speak of, the deputy guy. If he had a better script, I could see him doing really well. The rest were bad enough to be called super amateur, but not bad enough that it was really distracting. I mean, if the story and script were better, the acting levels would have been distracting, so take that for what it's worth. The again, if the script were better, maybe the acting would have been, too. Probably not.

The jump scares are harmless fun, just how I like them.

The flying dog was entertaining, the taxidermied bear that was supposed to be freshly killed was pretty pathetic. It's not a good movie. But for some reason, it didn't piss me off.

If you need background noise and to forget you're doing some mundane but still be able to do the mundane thing, I guess this movie will do.

Hunt for the Skinwalker (2018)

Just not enough.

[5/10 · 16 November 2021]

Not polished enough, not interesting enough, not enough actual evidence, etc.

Decent interviews and film quality, but it's just so disjointed. Every 10 or 15 minutes is an odd clip of what feels like the intro to a documentary but they never really lead to a new segment or anything the audience can clearly follow as to say, "this is where we're going now".

It promises a lot and delivers very little. Not sure where all this footage is that's never been seen by public before or why what they included was kept secret. No minds being blown wide open with this one, sorry all.

Death of a Vlogger (2019)

At a loss.

[1/10 · 9 September 2021]

Not sure what to believe anymore. Are these reviews that five over a 5 for real? They either are your have very low standards.

Boring. Amateur acting. It's almost like the camera person knows exactly what's going to happen. Weird. And if the characters aren't acting very afraid, why should I?

Nothing makes this movie stand out from the rest of the mediocre-at-best ff out there. Pass on this one unless you've run out of material.

Host (II) (2020)

A fun time

[8/10 · 9 September 2021]

I don't like nor do I usually fall for jump scares, they're usually more annoying than anything else. But this movie has a few good ones that got me and made me giggle afterwards.

Good job of building atmosphere and creeps, good acting all around from the ladies, a few fairly original scares that may have been seen elsewhere but not from me, so I thought they worked.

Quick to get started, quick to move through the story, but none of it seemed to come up short or be missing something. It's not a long run time, but it definitely doesn't need to be. They hit the mark on a lot of found footage horror necessities and then threw in a good amount of extras for our viewing pleasure. Well done!

Backtrack (I) (2015)

Enjoyable

[8/10 · 31 August 2021]

Nice little ghost story, nice little mystery.

The acting was really well done, the story was just enticing enough to draw you in. I wouldn't say it had any twists, it had a mystery to solve.

Sometimes, you just want to sit down and watch a good rainy day movie that keeps you involved but doesn't need to change your life or blow your mind. It's a solid movie that I really enjoyed and would recommend if you want to just watch a good movie.

-2 stars for a few obnoxious jump scares and not enough Sam Neil.

The Search for One-eye Jimmy (1994)

Man, I miss the 90s!

[9/10 · 30 August 2021]

Classic, just a good classic comedy. Everyone is great in it, it's a fun, simple story that doesn't drop the ball at any point. The characters are so oddball and off the wall that you just want, no, NEED them to actually exist, even though there's probably no way you'd actually want to hang out with many of them for real.

Sam Rockwell's soliloquy is divine brilliance, nothing short of genius.

If you happen across this little gem, it's well worth your time to indulge a little bit.

The Beach House (II) (2019)

The stupid is delayed.

[2/10 · 29 August 2021]

It's an ok movie until, really, the last 30 seconds. Then there's zero payoff and it ruins what could have been a decent hour and a half.

Don't waste your time, because you will if you watch this. The ending makes no sense in an art house no one is going to tell this little rich kid his movie sucks kind of way.

Jeepers Creepers III (2017)

Not enough Creeper, too much jeepers.

[3/10 · 16 August 2021]

I wish it had been a straight forward, scary monster movie like the first two. They try to do too much with it and it just falls way short. Too much drama, too much character building, too many "fancy" action shots, and none of them are done well so it's just a mess.

Would like to see something that picks up where the second one left off, and have the same feel.

Rorschach (2015)

Now I understand the title.

[1/10 · 13 June 2021]

You see what you want to see. But there's nothing actually there and that's what I saw. Because it's not a Rorschach test, it's a movie and movies are supposed to show you at least something.

Don't fall for the hype like I did. Even the mediocre reviews made it sound like it wouldn't be a complete waste of time, but it is. Even when they were pointing out, ad nauseam, something that was supposed to be there, I saw absolutely nothing. Nothing is there! Slight sounds? Maybe. Nothing scare in the very least happened in this clickbait movie.

Please, move on.

Blackwood Evil (2000 Video)

Not a good movie.

[2/10 · 3 June 2021]

The worst thing about this movie is the lead woman. She's a manipulative, immature, passive-aggressive, unprofessional, and under rehearsed character. She presents her lines for the "documentary" portion of the "movie" like a high schooler who just threw their presentation together at lunchtime. She badgers the antagonistic property owner in a really just annoying way. He somehow comes across as more likeable than her and I don't think that's what they were going for.

All issues aside with choppy storytelling, terrible sound quality, and noooothing happening for most of the movie and when things did happen, it mostly made no sense, I wanted a ghost to jump out and slap that lady so bad.

Gave it 2 stars because I did watch until the end so there's that.

Butterfly Kisses (2018)

Interesting

[8/10 · 22 April 2021]

If it weren't for the multiple layers of story going on, it probably would have been a halfway decent found footage trope. That part of the movie wasn't bad, it was entertaining enough to keep you interested and was a clever, newish spin on urban myths and haunted kids. That part also had some decent creep moments (and some cheesy ones, too).

But the other things going on on top of and around that storyline made it a better movie, for me. There were realistic questions brought up and explored, unveilings that are typical in mystery documentaries, just a good amount of things going on to keep you hooked. I thought it was well acted and had some good twists and creative spins.

I would not only recommend it, but I would watch it again.

In a Stranger's House (2018)

It's alright.

[3/10 · 15 April 2021]

I've turned off worse.

It had its creep factor moments. The problem I had with the movie was the guy's reaction to things. It seems that his downplaying of what had previously happened and were currently happening took away from the potential frights. Sometimes the scariest thing about a moment is when the person you're with is scared, and that was really lacking in this.

He was an above adequate actor, I just know I would have some bigger reactions to what I was witnessing.

Could he also not have just turned on some lights? Did I miss something?

The Houses October Built (2014)

Pretty good

[7/10 · 2 March 2021]

I am a found footage junkie and I feel like I've seen it all, so I passed this movie up for a long time. There have been some very good documentaries about haunts and I don't think this movie tries to pass itself off as one. I won't be using that as criteria for my choice of rating and neither should you. I don't know why anyone would think it's supposed to be real even before watching.

But anyway, it's pretty creepy and well acted. The characters are on the real side and not too unlikeable. It's not gory and gross, a lot of things are implied or off screen, which I prefer. (The language is rough, though, and there's a scene of nudity.)

If you like a more realistic approach, mind the plot holes!, and can overlook some minor irritations, then you may find it a refreshing take on a played out genre.

Real Cases of Shadow People: The Sarah McCormick Story (2019)

The Blair White Trash Project

[1/10 · 29 January 2021]

I didn't even make it through my first sitting. I know I'll go back to finish it because I hate myself. May take me several attempts and I'll skip through some chunks because the conversations in the car are just pathetic and atrocious. Pitty, because the lead gal and some of the interviews aren't that awful. Good enough to be mediocre to not bad if the content were more bearable. Just some attention to detail could have made it more realistic (like a clean shirt when on camera interviewing people). The two guys who play her crew are worthless and crass. Not funny. I don't know how it ends yet, and based on other reviews, it's most likely not a satisfying death for them. Shame.

The Haunting (1999)

We died.

[1/10 · 17 October 2019]

My husband took a drink each time Luke said "wow". I took a drink each time Theo said "god". Now we're dead. Good news, hell is better than this movie. Should have just watched the original.

Simon Birch (1998)

READ THE BOOK INSTEAD!!!!!

[28 July 2003]

I know it's a cliche but it's never been so true as it is for this movie: the book is WAY BETTER! there is nothing good to be said about his movie if u've read the book. everything... THE IMPORTANT THINGS... were all changed for the movie and completely flubbed up the story. the essence of what was supposed to come thru has been completely demolished, as hollywood can only do! if u saw this movie, and u liked it, i pray that u're illiterate.

this movie makes me want to wretch.