Change Your Image
sampah70
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Reviews
Avatar: The Way of Water (2022)
Intentionally came for the visual and it was worth it
I never watched movies in theatre anymore. The last time I've done it maybe some twenty more years ago with my wife when we haven't yet had any child.
This move I know I wanted to see it on a big screen in 3D IMAX. I have some regret not watching the first Avatar movie (also Transformers series) in a big screen. Honestly I don't really care for the storyline crap or whatsnot, I just want to indulge my visual experience.
So I brought all my family (except my eldest son who's in the college and lives in different town a few hundred miles away) to watch it in the theatre. And yes. It's really worth it.
Storywise, while it was not that bad, it just mediocre. If the first avatar I rated at 7 this one maybe 5 or 5.5 at most. In fact I felt dissatisfied by those cliches and twists, eg. Like most of american movies, they rooted for an obvious ahole and troublesome guy, who with a cheesy redemption become a main hero, injustifically forgetting all of their previous sins (pretty much forcing a flawed/short-sighted christian ideology to us viewer); or one that obviously imitated from Games Of Thrones: they unchallantly killed the good one for some shock effect; or dumb twist to push over to the next movie which I really don't like; a movie should be fully content by itself, never hold on to the next one like some Mexican soap opera series.
Overall if you care enough for the story, this movie is not for you. But if you wanted an amazing visual experience, you have to watch it best on the big screen on IMAX 3D.
Westworld: The Adversary (2016)
Stupid
I understand that in this whole westworld "scifi" story, we often have to dampened intelligence a bit. But this Maeve little arch story was just stupid beyond common sense. The chinese tech, supposed to be a brilliant engineers to be accepted in this hi-profile company, yet he (also his co-worker) seemed to have IQ below normal. Also coward beyond believe.
What's the danger of one naked girl whose EVERYTHING can be controlled by their gadget. They can simply turn her off, or decrease ALL her stats, or at least his physical ability.
This is not even even a lazy writing. It's simply a stupid writing.
Lucifer (2016)
Dumbed down version of "The Mentalist"
The show starting pretty decent, actually. But then the character getting more and more stupid (I blame this to the writers). They literally portrayed the devil, a being with more than a thousand years old that should be very intelligent and cunning, as instead behaves emotionally naive and childish like an 11 year angsty kid.
The Mentalist is not in any way perfect but it much a better construct than this stupid show (beside that long, stupid annoying Red John thingy). It seemed that Lucifer is nothing but a "Patrick Jane"'s wannabee with similar weird antics and particularly blunt honest. The main difference is that Patrick Jane's is smart and insightful, and his instinct for the main culprit which often differs with others, at the end always proven true. While Lucifer always never get it right a slight bit. How an ancient being acted that utterly moronic way is beyond ridiculous, not funny just annoying as hell.
I think It's clearly written by many people with vast different IQ range.
Red Notice (2021)
Bad Cartoon.
I confess I didn't even watched the whole movie, but the beginning of this crap was very dumb stupid I can't expect anything good for the rest.
The part when they chased Jack Ryan was utterly dumb and cliche. Their attemp to create scene like Jackie Chan or Indiana Jones chasing was failed terribly. Jackie Chan's show off about his gymnastic or Indy's antics was witty and fit, but in this movie they were just plain bad, dull and stupid. I don't understand why they even doing that. Not even a slight tension or urgency, it's ike watching cartoon, a bad cartoon.
I have to take note to myself never watching movie by this director or writer again (Turned out it was directed and written by the same person, no wonder).
I can really tell that the writer is not the brightest tool in the shed.
Debris (2021)
A soap opera about magic and superstition
This crap is far away from science or even common sense. Even put in the magic/fantasy genre is an understatement; in the early episodes they straight to CREATING LIFE, which even in every magic/fantasy stories that's virtually IMPOSSIBLE. Not even the most powerful individual in Harry Potter, Tolkien, C Lewis, Sagan, Asimov, StarTrek, StarWars, DC, Marvel etc. Can create life, much less a device or scrap or DEBRIS of it.
The loud, suspenseful and over-dramatic sound effects also exactly as dumb as generic Mexican or Indian soap opera.
Most ineraction dialogs are slow, dull, stupid and unnecessary, often pretentious.
The lead actor guy was also unconvincing, random emo-driven dude without even pleasing to the eyes. I guess he's getting role as a stupid and emotional guy according to the story line. He's got the job because he's been pulled out from Afghanistan and that of course make sense for this crap because Afghanistan is a magical country or some kind of that.
Hitman: Agent 47 (2015)
dumber
This movie is even dumber than the previous one.
The said "da best assassin on earth", ransacking and killing everything on his path: another op-agents, their leaders, even cops and soldiers, spectacularly (typical american way: BADDA BOOM! BANG! CRASH! And everything); and yet FAILED to execute his one and only target: a teenager girl. WTF?
Also..
Jason Bourne need only a pencil to kill, Riddick use a cup (or a pin would do as well). But this "da best assassin on earth" of course need a full set of James Bond's approved super gear killing machines.
And of course he's easily killed ALL those trained agents, cops, soldiers (a.k.a rented STAR WARS' STROMTROOPERS), with his BADDA BOOM! BANG! CRASH! American style... He's succeeded to shot dead from ALL those ridiculous angles, and yet MISSED when he tried to shot his target (the teenage girl) point blank. WTF?
Hitman (2007)
dumb
When an action movie NARRATING instead of ACTING, you know it's pretty lame. This stupid movie literally telling you that this man is da best killer in da world, while in fact that said da best killer is kinda slow, lazy, and dumb.
This super assassin has a bald head with a BARCODE tattoo no less; yeah, I bet it's cool for a 12 years old, but I'm pretty sure he wouldn't go far when even a random toddler can be able to positivily identify him.
Friends (1994)
Real cuteness vs. Hey look at me! I AM CUTE!
I rewatch this 90s sitcom binging it. It didn't make me laugh AT ALL.
Some cute moment by Phoebe (Lisa Kudrow) was okay, I guess its engaging.
But that pretentious wannabe nerdy and cute (so fake), Ross, talking with baby voice, obnoxious juvenile, passive-agressive, pathetic and overall ahole, was not okay, I really hated him (both his character and eventually the actor who overacting it).
Reacher (2022)
Dragged too long
I thought it was a tv serial of Jack Reacher. No. It's actually a mega series. This 8 (read EIGHT) of each 1 hour film was only for ONE story, or maybe a couple.
I really hate this kind of over exaggerating short story to a long winding multiple films.
This Jack Reacher also atill too pretty and too much talking..
A Cinderella Story: Starstruck (2021)
Cringe as hell
This dumb story become even more cringey with dumber plot and acts. Of course I didn't expect the main girl to perform nearly as good as emma thompson (or even emma watson), but she's just plain bad at her act of switched persona, she's not even convincing at her primary role as a farm girl. I wouldn't say she's a bad actor, it just the roles are unfit for her and she's lacking experience, a lot. The rest of the casts pretty much mediocre as well; maybe the stepmother quite good though she only get a small part.
Columbo: Sex and the Married Detective (1989)
Columbo the defender of the late murderers, cheaters and black-mailers
It's become more and more often Columbo defending "the rights" of despicable people. I know they out of ideas, so they throwing all convoluted scenarios to make it "fresh" or "engaging" by sacrificing moral clarity; they're down to by only one modus: the victim was actually killed because of retaliation of his own wrongdoing.
Any movie/story excuse by "There's no black and white in real life" argument is simply BS, fiction is not real life.
Garage Sale Mysteries (2013)
dumb plot (in)convenience
It supposed to be a modern version of "Murder, She Wrote" that I loved much, Unfortunately today's writer / producer deliberately inserted that dumb cliches, it suddenly drop down to mexican telenovelas genre.
Stupidities and dumb WTF cliches like: critical phone close missed/hanged up, something doesn't work when it most needed, forget to bring somethng important, hesitant to tell the utmost important information without any reason etc. You feel cheated, it insulted your intelligence.
Venom: Let There Be Carnage (2021)
stupid made up crap
This dumb made up plot was not even funny. It's literally something that would have been told by a toddler.
Why would he think he is responsible for the serial killer punishment? And by visiting them in person? And suddenly got insulted? And then get bitten? What a stupid plot.
And also GET HURT by the bit, while he's occasionally crashed from dozen stories building without even a scratch. That stupid dumb plot convenience.
And how the hell just a drop of his blood become even stronger, much stronger than the main body. You again, LITERALLY, can just create several hundred other clones by the same method. That yet another stupid dumb plot convenience.
Peter Rabbit (2018)
a film for ahole, even the main actor played by an infamous ahole
From the very first few seconds, movie opening by bird singing, it's already shown that this will be a bad movie.
In this immoral movie, starred by an ahole clown (jimmy gordijn), teaching you about very essential american value: being an ahole is good and encouraged. Eff them all, as long as you win or get your target, you're good.
Unknown (2011)
stupid
This movie is full of stupidities and heavily forced PLOT devices. It's insulting your brain you'd get your IQ decreased by half.
Sorry, your review is too short. It needs to contain at least 150 characters.
Blackbird (2019)
Ugly film
Kate Winslet has old genes but not in a good way. She's always look too old for her age. She's already looked old in Titanic when she's practically a teenager then. Her husband in this film is also ugly, a far stepback from de Caprio from Titanic.
Susan Sarandon was one of the most stunning actress, *was* is the keyword.
The girl from the newest Alice in Wonderland movie didn't do much acting here as some spoiled, entitled, screwed-up, like pretty much every american girl today.
I wonder why they didn't mentioning anything about prom-night, usually every american movie like this will always say something abut prom-night, it's their most importantest event for every american, like, ever.
Morlocks (2011)
stupid
This movie is so stupid aliens from the future come back to destroy this stupid movie.
Sorry, this review is too short. It needs to contain at least 150 characters.
The Invisible Man (2020)
Cheap stupid movie
There's some dozen "Invisible Man" out there. How is this compared to others?
I watched uninterestedly for the first few minutes until startled by a loud sound (the actress accidentally cick pet bowl -IIRC). WTF dude? Only 5 minutes into the movie and they've already retorted back to jump-scare?
Jump-scare is an indicator of how bad a horror/thriller movie was made. You don't need intelligence to jumpscare people, even a TODDLER can do it. Thus a movie with jumpscares (with empty threat, just to make your hear jumped), would be guaranteed to be a movie with TODDLER level intelligence's PLOT/STORY.
The most infuriating thing about this kind of movie, is that they dragged us to their level, they'll assume the audience are as stupid as them, very much like indian scammers (or practically, just indians, they're all scammers).
Psycho Goreman (2020)
this girl shia laboof is as infuriating as shea leabuof, maybe even more
Finally canada has an actor (actress) comparable to sheia leBuouf at its unbearably annoying ahole acts. I suppose she's justin bbebere half sibling (half chihuahua)
Mirrormask (2005)
a yet another story about a little love
It's Jim Henson's, I never really get a bad craft from Jim Henson since I've watched The Muppets in 70s. Some of them maybe just meh, but they're still arts, not junks.
This movie is no different, by the very first few minutes, if you're not that thick, you'll now it's been represented with imaginative artistic in mind.
Beyond the Black Rainbow (2010)
Boring and bad acting
I already know it will be a bad movie at the very first beginning when the actor (as dr. Arboria?) narrating about his instution... arboria.
Narrating, rather than showing it up to us, is a sign of bad movie (with a few exception of course).
Then introducing the girl prisoner patient (still in the first few minutes), the acting was so fake and bad; really really amateurish, like a highschool drama project actress playing an insane/hysterical asylum patient.
Then the story.. what story? I guess it was some story in there but the presentation has already spoiled it to me.
I'd rated it 4.5/10 at best.
A Quiet Place Part II (2020)
Because... LOGIC
This moving pictures has a full of WONDERFUL LOGICAL SENSE so I couldn't be bothered to even depicted a coherent sentences to faithfully illustrate this movie's styles and story. This will answer many intriguing questions with unquestionably firm logical answers.
- The invasion has only happened in some little town (pop: 2,119) in newark, or is it alabama? But don't worry it will be copy-pasted to every towns in every countries at roughly the exac time.
- The aliens are very perceptive to any tiny sounds, they can hear people speak shielded by concrete 1 meter thick (notice we use metric because it's scientific; and science = logic).
- But don't worry, they can't hear your breathing and your heart beat even at close encounter, because those aren't even included in the dubbing of the film. Apparently the closer the aliens, the more confused they are because people emits various sounds.
- The aliens will catch you very fast from a far distance. But again, not to be worried, when they're close they will slow down, very slow, to give you (precisely: somebody with PLOT ARMOR) a chance to escape by whatever it means.
- The aliens are blind, unless you see them, then they will "see" your sounds. This simple logic is often forgotten.
- The aliens only here to kill, nothing else. They build their culture based on LOGIC.
- You need to nail the plank in the stair upside down, it will remind you that there's a nail upside down in your stair.
- The alien invasion actually has a positive side: it will render every babies to be completely docile and silent. Except (of course) when you need them to be silent.
- since the entertainment left is only making baby, human should make more babies to avoid extinction. Don't bother about how to raise them properly and safely, we can be sure god has a plan for them.
- If you have choices to step on dried leaves or soft green grass, you have to pick the former because it's the movie about alien who's very sensitive about sounds. There's nothing to the story if you choose the safe path. The same logic with why shouldn't you wear at least a pair of socks to dampen the stepson... (I meant: sound of steps).
- You've been quite for a loong time, so when you have a chance to do something dumb, you must scream as loud as you can from the top of your lungs, because you completely understand the consequence and you've got tired of it. LOGIC.
- If a mom (and even a little girl) can easily defeat and blast the creature's head with a shotgun (or mereley a pipe if you're a little girl), don't ever think the pro soldiers can be able to do it as well, even with RPG, because a mom don't like to do it often and a dude soldier can not be a MILF. Furthermore, the aliens are too primitive to be attacked with modern artilleries, they can simply defy LOGIC.
- Another positive side of alien invasion, your right hand becomes targaryen, it's fireproof or at least burn-proof. You can hold a fired-up lighter as long as you can.
- You have to continuously play/broadcast "beyond the sea" song to give the audience a hint of where are you now, because maps are no longer exist at the time, the aliens eat them all, along with umbrellas. Though fortunately, you might keep Upstate New York travel/transportation guide which has map in it.
- Some might ask if it's okay for a little girl traveling alone to save the world? Absolutely. In every ingenius zombie movies, it has been proven over and over again, that the PLOT ARMOR is even thicker than magic. Why did she do that, though? You asked. Simple, because it's LOGIC.
- Jumpscare is a very effective way to scare people, EVEN A TODDLER CAN DO IT. BOO! That's why high quality movies always have it. The more jumpscares the higher quality of the movie. It's simply LOGIC.
- Don't say that those kids (particularly one, the evil-one, but practically everyone, tbh) are dumber than dumb and always doing exactly everything they shouldn't have to and put everyone in serious danger. Because if they weren't, then you can't see much in this movie. Is it really that you want? A 15 minutes movie? Beside, in this movie, you should believe more in PLOT DEVICE than even Jesus.
- Robbing oxygen form your own baby brother is not evil but necessity, even encouraged, the stronger should prevail.
- Turned out the aliens can't swim -eh, why? Of course it was because the aliens were ugly, and angry, and hungry (and water is smooth, cool and calm); that's the only logical reason why. Hence you should also never tell anybody about this little secret. Because: REASON, duh...
- Another reason why the aliens can't swim is because they are not australian (in case you don't know all kids in oz, except QLD, are required to learn to swim formally at their primary school).
- Actually this movie has found a scientific secret: water is a perfect sound barrier. When presented formally, there's no doubt that those logical scientific foundings will be honored, at least with nobel prize in scientology.
- When finally you have a chance to deploy the aliens' kryptonite, don't rush, take your time, brew a cup of coffee first if you wish. Let the tension up and give alien chance to hurt your mom first, since you don't know it do you? Enjoy your time, lets the time ticking and the tension up even more. Then finally, BAM!!! Slam your kryptonite device to the microphone as hard as you can with full rage as it will make difference. Because it's LOGIC.
- I've always mixed-up Emily Blunt with Alicia Vikander.
- I have several folders for movies according to their categories, the most lowestest level folder is: STUPID_MOVIES (it's even lower than SUCKED_MOVIE level); I found the first movie has also already been saved there. I really shouldn't have to be suprised.
- funfact: try this: sort user reviews by rating. You won't reach rating:2. Not until you've scrolled "Load More" for 5 times in a row.
- I rated this movie 10, but based on this movie's sounds logic, zero is not matter (it's a number), it's nothing anyways.
Constantine (2005)
just nice
It's not the best movie by far, not even very good, I guess, but this one is sure my favorite I don't mind to watch it over and over again; I don't think its overall rating of 5.5 will do it justice (hence my overrating).
I loved to watch Rachel Weisz acting in this movie, she really can deliver subtle emotion/tension that maybe missed by many viewers. And Keanu, well- he's an icon, a big one, anything he's doing will be favorable by many anyway.
The story was actually pretty good if you into fantasy movies and didn't try connect it too hard to religion.
Possessor (2020)
Unnecessary stupid
This movie was unnecessary gory and illogical. Those so called professional assassins killed their target by bloody unefficient manners.
Lets put aside that the most effective use of brain control is to plant it into presidents, pms, kings, pope, or other powerful world leaders. Why did the kills must be that violent, bloody and messy? Even Kim Jong capable to murder his older brother with only tissue+poison.
This said pro assassins organization in the future, sure is much more stupid than poor backward north korean soldiers.
Class of 1999 (1990)
The problem with our education
Our education system is so bad, it made people so dumb they can even make crappy film like this.
Sorry, my review is too short. I have to made up words to make it contains at least 150 characters.