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Glass Onion (2022)
Love & Thunder All Over Again - a victory lap for a successful predecessor!
What a shame - I was really looking forward to this one!
Similar to Love & Thunder earlier this year, Glass Onion felt more like a victory lap for its successful predecessor rather than a worthy sequel. Whilst not glaringly self-indulgent like Taika's L&T, GA did feel lazy and little-more than a mostly by-the-numbers setup with some colour added on the top. 'Style over substance' comes to mind - I mean, everybody 'looked good' but it ended there.
Whilst still likeable, Craig's Detective Blanc is somewhat reduced to a parody of his previous portrayal, entering Branagh/Poirot territory. Norton plays the a-hole tech billionaire well, though unmemorable (it didn't seem to be much of a departure from himself to be honest). Monáe was good overall - but the audience doesn't like her as much as we did De Armas - as for the rest, stock characters and performances.
As for the plot, it got good for a moment in the middle. Though it didn't live up, nor carry it through. And there were some very lousy/unfulfilling revelations and occurrences in the third act which felt like they belonged in the lower-echelon of Netflix films. Unsatisfactory payoff (if you can call it that) and a baffled viewer trying to understand how this has had good reviews.
Not a waste of time, but not a good time. 6/10.
Hitman: Agent 47 (2015)
Makes the 2007 Hit-man film look like a masterpiece!
I never expected anything more of this film than run of the mill action with the Hit-man flavor. I was sorely disappointed. Firstly I felt like the first hour or so of the film was a take on "The Terminator" with a bit of a "Leon: The Professional" vibe too. There was even an antagonist who had rejuvenating body armour like a Terminator cyborg. He got shot plenty of times to kill him and even electrocuted but wouldn't die. Agent 47 was basically reduced to a supporting character and the "sixth sense" nonsense where the female protagonist learns to harness her own Hit-man skills is laughable. Throw in the old "you're brother and sister" and you've got your classic 1am made-for-TV b-movie. However my greatest disappointment was at the end when they take the HQ down and do all of this "in-sync" shooting with one another, crossing arms etc... it was so cringe worthy. The only cool part of the film for me was when I accepted she had a sixth sense of a sort and at the very end where the female protagonist anticipated a powerful army or special ops team of sorts coming up the stairs to get them, when in fact it was Agent 48. Then the film ended. It was kind of cool. I love Hit-man but was very disappointed although I do feel if they ever make another one they need to have an actor who is essentially a no-name because 47 is so blank in the face if you had a famous person playing the character I feel you would lose your suspension of disbelief. No disrespect to The Late Paul Walker who was in talks to play the iconic video game character. Lastly I feel that what the Hit-man games are about; stealth and creative ways to execute contracts is not what an action films wants which is full on shoot-outs. In the game Hit-man if you carried on the way they did in this film (or the last to be honest) then you would lose so many points for not being a "silent assassin" as he "goes loud" almost every time in this. The need to go Nolan-Batman, dark themed if they were to translate this into a successful film franchise.