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Reviews
Hemlock Grove (2013)
Porn, with annoying people, and terrible story
I've seen my fair share of TV shows and my God this show is downright awful. It took me 8+ episodes to even realize the characters names because there were so many thrown at you in the first episode. It tries to be "cryptic" but it does it in the worst possible way. Every episode you have more "what the hell is that?" Or "what the hell is going on?" moments and you never get explanations. I was hoping I would get a moment of clarity where everything would make sense, but no. It just keeps going on and on and you never fully know what is going on. The scenes jump from one place to another as if the editors were drunk and placed the scenes out of order. There are NO like able characters; everyone is rude and selfish and straight up annoying. I actually get sick of seeing the characters faces. The worst is the acting. My God they are horrible actors who couldn't show an actual emotion if they tried. When they are trying to act angry everyone pouts like a 5 year old. There is not a single moment in this show where there is a joke. I'm not saying it should be hilarious but everyone is so serious all the time to the point where I just laugh at the awful writing. And why is there so much sex in this show! It has pointless sex scenes that go on for 5 minutes and it adds to the terrible writing of the show. Stay away from it and watch anything else of you don't want to waste your time.
True Love: Holly (2012)
Amazing
Apparently some people out there are mad that this story is showing a teacher falling in love with a student...but seriously the title of the show is called "True Love" this episode is not straight up saying "hey kids its OK to sleep with your teachers" it's showing a beautiful relationship about 2 girls. Honestly I watch this episode once every few months and it gives me such a happy feeling afterward. This episode just blows my mind. The best part is when Holly and Karen are just sitting in Holly's apartment cuddling, and the scene has no dialog, but just background noise. The scene does not further the story anymore but it just makes the title of the show pop more . I would recommend everyone to watch it because it just reaffirms my faith in love. I love it and I love the people who wrote it and helped make it possible. Beautiful story.
The Neighbors (2012)
If you love your life you will stay away from this "sitcom"
I have no idea how someone could actually enjoy this. After the season premier of Modern Family me and my Brother just decided to give the show a chance, which was a mistake. After the very first scene I knew it was going to be bad, but they successfully made it worse.
First, the aliens are not funny. The cold alien humor has been done so many times that it is bordering on cliché. I also happened to notice that everything was green, which made me want to throw a remote at the TV because really? How cliché is it for aliens to be green.
Second, they desperately pull for jokes to the point where it is actually sad. The "wife" alien throwing the dishes out the window was slightly funny the first time, but after the fourth or fifth time it just got tired.
Third, why is the phone sex lady from Seinfeld the biggest actor in the show? There was no one else willing to do the show? Shocking because it is terrible.
Fourth, the aliens telling the humans that they are aliens in the first episode? What is the rest of the show going to be about because I could not tell you. If it is just about aliens learning from humans then it is going to get real old real fast for people who actually enjoyed this show.
Fifth, how in the world can this show seriously think it can follow Modern Family? How many Emmy's did Modern Family win? I can tell you this show will never win anything. Whoever thought they could ever try and follow the greatest sitcom (that actually makes people laugh) on TV was sadly mistaken.
Sixth, who thought of this horrible plot for the show? If I was a sitcom writer and someone gave me the Neighbors idea or the Seinfeld "this show is about nothing" idea I would choose Seinfeld. I cannot believe this was actually aired.
Seventh, they really tried to make people laugh by naming all the aliens after famous athletes, but it did not work. It was not funny when the aliens first started naming the other aliens and it was not funny when they kept calling the little kid "dick".
Eighth, I need to point out how the aliens looked...you have got to be kidding me. E.T. looks more believable. They look like the pile of crap that Lisa turns Chet in Weird Science, and even the pile of crap looks better than these aliens.
Ninth, The aliens having "sex" was by the far the worse part in the TV show. The writer's seriously tried to grab every last laugh out of everyone that they could, and it was not successful.
Tenth, the second I heard the aliens call their "phone" a poopad I knew I should have turned it off, but I did not because I figured I would give it a chance. All the aliens have cliché things like a UFO, Sleeping Pods, oh and of course space suits.
Most of the time I watch something and do not like it I will tell people "Just give it a chance because you may appreciate it more than me," but for the love of TV shows do not contribute to this show. I wish I could have that 30 minutes of my life back. Whatever you do stay away from this horrid thing they call a sitcom.
One more thing I would like to point out. When they casted the actor for the aliens son did they just say "Hey, we should get the most hideous kid that has no emotion what so ever"