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3/10
I want my $8 and 2 hours of my life back...
28 February 2008
Warning: Spoilers
I saw this movie last night as part of Q Cinema (Fort Worth) monthly movie series. Wow.... bad movie...

Let's start with the plot. Not actually bad and in the hands of a great director and cast could have been worthwhile. Our hero, Adam, a young, athletic, gay school teacher picks up celebrity photographer Jake in a bar and has a one night stand. Unfortunately, Jake is kidnapped and apparently killed after Adam leaves. Unbeknownst to our poor Adam, Jake is at the center of a major gay conspiracy. And now, Adam is being followed, stalked and harassed by various groups setting up the entire plot which is based on one contrivance and coincidence after another. For example, Jake just happens to be the son of the owner of a major news organization which just happens to employ Adam's ex-girlfriend who is an ambitious young reporter. Adam just happens to pick up Jake's cell phone by mistake that holds the clue to the big conspiracy. And if Adam would simply have worn a different jacket at any point in the movie, half of the people tracking him would have been confounded since that's where a tracking device was planted on him! I imagined Alfred Hitchcock directing this and what a good movie it could have been of showing an innocent man caught in a web of intrigue.

On the other hand, the dialogue and acting really let the mediocre plot down. Some of the dialogue is laugh out loud funny and this is NOT a comedy. Part of that is bad writing, part is bad acting. The main characters come off as amateurs spouting high school prose.

The entire execution of the film left me baffled. We're supposed to believe that not only does the government but a major news industry has created a network of surveillance cameras so complete that they can spy on us anywhere... at home, in a public restroom, at the bathhouse (let's hope that's not true but then again that footage would be better than this movie). So a large part of the film is shot to appear to be close circuit cameras which could have been a good plot device if not over used. After a while, though, I began wondering, how they got that camera there in that angle instead of watching the movie.

Another directorial choice made was to replay key scenes from different perspectives or after you've learned more. As a general rule, I find these distracting if not used well. Here, they are way overused. Sometimes we see the same scene 10 seconds later and the "replay" adds no value.

About the only unmitigated praise I can give the film is that the star is a good lookin' guy. So there's an eye candy benefit.
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Feast of Love (2007)
3/10
Contrived! Incredulous!
27 September 2007
Warning: Spoilers
Saw this movie last night in a preview. Had high hopes from the cast and the director. Hopes were dashed on the rocks of cinematic stupidity. At the core of this movie is the story of three couples and their loves, losses, toils and tears.

Morgan Freeman and Jane Alexander play the older, wiser couple who are suffering a heartbreak which is revealed about 1/3 of the way through the movie. Of the three couples, they are the most interesting and the least explored. Here we have an inter-racial couple in their late sixties facing their mortality with a deep abiding love. I could have watched them for 1.5 hours! Couple their interesting story with the fine acting that these pro's deliver and you'd have a great movie.

Greg Kinnear and X are the second "middle-aged" couple. I say X because Greg goes through several women in the movie.

Toby Hemingway and Alexa Davalos are the young couple. Romeo and Juliet, young love, yada yada yada.

What annoyed me about the movie were the constant coincidences. I think only 10 people live in Portland and they all sleep together. On scene involves Greg Kinnear and his new wife Radha Mitchell (who just ended a long affair with a married man, but kept his shirt). Greg and Radha jaunt off to a party with Radha wear the aforementioned shirt. Guess who is at the party? Yup - married man and wife who Radha the real estate agent sold a house to years ago (which started the affair). Of course wife recognizes Radha the Realtor and has to say hello where she of course recognizes the shirt since it happened to be a birthday gift from her to her cheatin' husband. And of course that shirt was missing a tell-tale button which eliminated any possibility of a duplicate. Thus drama ensued...

Another scene that stretched my credulity followed quickly afterward when Greg Kinnear's character decides his body must feel the same pain as his heart and slices off the tip of his finger. Rushed to the hospital by wise and kindly Morgan Freeman who continuously admonishes him to stop telling people he did it himself, Greg falls in love with the Doctor who stitches him up. What was amazing was the Doctor falls in love with the crazy guy who just chopped his finger off.

Oh and the movie had way too much nudity. I'm not a prude but I'm not a fan of excessive nudity for the sake of nudity. Same with some of the coarse language.

Overall rating: I wouldn't pay an airline $3 for the headphones to hear this movie!
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Proteus (2003)
Missed it by that much
21 November 2004
At the heart of Proteus is a great story - actually two great stories - about the oppression of homosexuality during the 18th century. The main "love" story between Claas and the sailor has the makings of a very dramatic story if told well.

Where the movie went wrong, IMO, was mixing costuming, sets and props from different eras. I "get" what the director was trying to do - show us that these problems exist today as much as they did 300 years ago. But the visual jarring of seeing the modern next to the historical kept knocking me out of the plot. Halfway through the movie, I was wondering if this really was a directorial choice or simply a way to reduce costs by using readily available stuff rather than recreating the time period.

The secondary story about Virgil never takes off. We are supposed to juxtapose his life with Claas' and see how Claas becomes more accepting of his homosexuality, or at least "love" for another man, while Virgil becomes more closeted as the oppression begins. I never could figure out if Lorenz was Virgil's lover or just a gay friend.

In many ways, this movie would have been better served as a straightforward historical drama than attempting to take on multiple plots and risktaking direction.
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Ben & Arthur (2002)
1/10
Wow... This was bad
25 October 2004
This movie was laughably bad. A friend rented it from Netflix and made me watch it. There are so many gaffes and goofs that it's impossible to even bother getting to know the characters and the plot. How about these for example...

The "Vermont Airport" surrounded by palm trees

Ben's miraculously appearing shirt during a phone conversation

The priest's palatial office... complete with a folding card table desk

There is a decent story hidden behind a very bad movie. But even if you look past the technical flaws, you'll find horrid acting and casting. I was most tickled by the casting of a flamboyantly gay actor to play the right-wing religious zealot brother. His opening scene, sitting in his immaculate apartment, stroking his kitty cat, was hilarious.

I applaud the writer/director/producer/editor/star/caterer/cast dentist/composer (and whatever else he did on this move) for actually getting a movie like this distributed. If you have nothing better to do, it could be a fun group movie or even the basis of a drinking game but don't rent it for a powerful story about homophobia and gay marriage.
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Teenage Caveman (2002 TV Movie)
Do actors read scripts?
1 November 2001
I'm not sure what kind of scripts Andrew Keegan has been getting these days but there had to be at least one better than this movie. The entire plot (post apocalyptic survivors) has been done before and so much better before. The acting is worse than 90210 on a bad day. Why did people actually read this script and say, "hey, let's make this movie -- it's gonna be good!" I hope there were large paychecks attached for all!
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