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s_hemann
Reviews
Elephant (2003)
Don't be fooled by how stylistic it is
This was one of the absolute worst movies I have ever seen. When I began watching it, I was enthralled by the hypnotic images that Van Sant is known for. It seemed cool. Then... my high wore off, and I realized that there was little to no plot, hardly any dialogue, and the movie made no point whatsoever. I hated this movie even more than I hated Gerry. There was so much potential to make a great movie about a school shooting. He could have put some characterization into the two main characters, or any other character at that. Showing small scenes of happenings around each character, and then disbanding them before something actually opens up about their persona makes me mad. Or on the other side, just showing the two shooters get into a shower together without showing a reason why is really dumb. Why were they gay? Is that why they shot up the school? Did they just decide they wanted a homosexual experience before they tried a mass murder? A character walks through the halls as if he was some sort of prophet only to be murdered without speaking a line. There are so many things that I could say to try and convince people to not see this movie, but maybe you should all see it so you can understand what makes bad movies that tons of people seem to like for absolutely no reason. Artistic doesn't automatically make a movie good!
Black Cadillac (2003)
Worst movie I have ever seen in my entire life.
I honestly don't understand how any human being can possibly enjoy this movie! This is absolutely one of the worst written, acted, and directed movies I have ever seen. There was no real characterization of the characters besides the clearly spelled out, stereotypical, after school special monologues each of the main characters gave at their respected time. And how "Bad-ass" the character with a scar on his face was, you could truly feel his pain and torment.. sorry i couldn't hardly say that last sentence with a straight face. It was all horrible. The entire story was incredibly cheesy and predictable. Watching it with my friends, we were able to predict every single "suspenseful" moment that happened in the whole thing. This is one of those kinds of movies that make me horribly angry at the entire system of Hollywood. I can't understand how this movie is made when i hear about how hard Quentin Tarantino had to work to get Reservior Dogs made. I can't believe that movie producers read this script, along with countless others and say, "Yeah, I think this movie will be great. I'll invest multiple millions of dollars into this piece of non-garbage and it'll make a ton because people will love it!" And the worst part is, from reading other posts and the over 5 star rating on IMDb, that people actually did like this piece of predictable, horrible, cheesy, dumb trash. It's really sad when you can say truthfully that you think Randy Quaid was the best actor in a movie.