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Reviews
The Lighthouse (2019)
Curiosity got me
I feel like a kid who was curious about something and regretted satisfying that curiosity.
I wish I never waisted my time on this gross, ridiculous mess of a film.
Disappointed is an understatement.
Not sure why the writer/directer (which is a problem in itself, no checks/balances = terrible movie like this one) would ever think people want to watch other people doing the things they did in this film. And animal violence isn't nearly as edgy and cool as film makers like to think. Not sure why it's increasingly common. Shock value I guess. Cheap drama perhaps.
This movie is just more overrated "art" thinking it's portraying something deep or worth while. Nah, don't be fooled. It's not worth your while.
At least I learned that this writer/directer is not for me and I'll steer clear in the future.
Blonde (2022)
Marylin with Zoolanders voice
Jumping on the latest Hollywood trend wagon complete with the over the top insane mother, anti-choice propaganda, gratuitous female nudity, female exploitation, abuse of women in every way, etc. The only one missing from the checklist is a shockingly edgy live octopus eating and/or sex scene.
Having a Cuban actress play a non Cuban woman would be fine (even though it would condemned as 'wyt washing' if it were reversed) if she could do the right accent.
Her native accent wasn't always present though. Most the time she sounded like Zoolander.
More ridiculous Hollywood fiction that nobody asked for or wanted.
Ghost Story (1981)
I don't understand the high ratings
This movie should've been called "Alice Krige's Breasts."
I just watched this for the first time because of the good reviews on here, surprised that I'd never even heard of it before. Now I know why.
The beginning of this movie put me in mind of The Changeling (1980) with the snowy scenes, the ominous snowplow, music box, a dark secret, and even Melvyn Douglas. I thought maybe it was written and/or directed by the same person, but thankfully I was wrong. The Changeling was far superior and I'm glad it's not connected to Ghost Story.
I was very disappointed after forcing myself to sit through this entire movie. It was often very boring and had way too much gratuitous nudity, exploiting a young woman. It seemed to go in forever, and it was more bizarre than scary.
Also, IMO they could've done without the weirdo squatter duo entirely. That was just odd and uninteresting.
I just don't understand why all the positive reviews. It's been compared to
The Changeling but it's nowhere near as good. Just because you liked the book doesn't mean you have to like the movie.
My advice: if you want a good, scary classic "ghost story" that you can watch with the fam, skip this and just watch The Changeling.
Breathless (1983)
Shockingly bad
Had no idea Richard Gere could act so stupid. It's really embarrassing, even if he wasn't way too old to act so immature and obnoxious. It would be too much even for a teen. Speaking of teens, the girlfriend is nineteen and he's in his 30's. Ew.
This is a very stupid movie with stupid nudity. Who shower's with the (shower) door wide open just so they can shake their wiener at the empty bathroom? Alone? It's like Gere and the director forgot there was a camera man there haha.
What was the point of this movie?
1 star for yet another cameo of Po's father, Ping, still looking exactly the same age he always does.
The Boys (2019)
If you love gore and perversion
Yeah, this show makes the downfall of society very obvious.
Over the top gross in every possible way, no redeeming factors.
Not sure why the Christians are complaining though. What are they doing watching garbage like this to begin with? Lol That's just as hypocritical as the far left.
Like it's ok to blow peoples heads off and use language about f*ing her or this or that innocent animal, but you draw the line if they say gd?
Please stop with politics and religion and gross perversion and extreme gore and just make some good, quality entertainment. Maybe even for the whole family to enjoy...
Jessabelle (2014)
Another social justice horror minus the justice
Push it. Push it real good. Your political agenda, that is. Peele anyone? No, please no more.
I guess if you look at this movie from a symbolic perspective, it's spot on.
Misplaced "revenge" against an innocent white woman, for the sins of her forefathers.
Overkill, nonsensical "revenge" from an obviously overly hateful, all powerful, violent group.
Sounds very familiar...
The Boy Behind the Door (2020)
Insulting our intelligence
This movie is so unrealistic it's downright stupid.
I hope no kids see it and get influenced on what not to do.
Actually I hope nobody see's it for their own sake.
The amount of stupidity in this movie is overwhelming.
And of course the lead villain is a white woman (the only group left that it's ok to portray in a negative light) because that's usually who kidnaps children *eyeroll*
Worst movie I've seen in a long time.
In the Shadows, Someone's Watching (1993)
Weird movie...I kinda like it
Lydia the snobby psycho played the snobby saleswoman in Pretty Woman.
She's an amazing snob.
Anyway, this movie is so bad it's good.
Dark, twisted, odd.
I recommend it on a lazy night when you just want to watch something in bed.
The Mist (2007)
Too long
The "music" at the end made me wish I had a bullet for myself.
And what's with Marcia Gay Harden's finger?
Too many different creatures, spiders, mosquitos, octopi, and mini dragons?
Nahh.
Cleaner (2007)
Bad ending
I actually liked the movie, just not the ending.
Considering the circumstances, main character should've chose his friend over the law, it's not like he didn't have his own unlawful secrets.
Friend cop ended up looking kind of pitiful and was lied to. Made me feel sorry for him.
Then the stupid daughter had to shoot him square in the head? C'mon. She didn't have to kill him. It all just seemed so stupid at the end.
Premonition (2007)
Wish I could've warned myself not to watch
Ok, it actually started out pretty good.
It got worse as the movie went on. Sometimes so bad it was funny.
Plot holes galore.
By the end it was just frustrating.
I hate bad endings, and this was a doozy.
I wish I would have been warned not to watch this dud from my future self. Makes sense? No. Neither did this pile of s
PS Sandra Bullock speaks so softly and quietly in this whole movie-what is she trying to prove? That it can be as annoying as screaming in your face?
Suck (2009)
Funny & Cool Vampire Movie
All the songs are good, the acting is good, it's funny & creepy & everything you want in a vampire comedy. It also sends a good message.
Everyone involved is very talented & it shows.
I can't believe how much I enjoyed this movie. It's the kind of movie you can watch over & over.
Love the comedy, love the talent, & love Dimitri!
Thank you Rob Stefaniuk!!! Awesome job!
And thank you for keeping it clean :)
The Woman in the House Across the Street from the Girl in the Window (2022)
Good until the Twist
I actually enjoyed the series until the last stupid episode. Do they really expect us to believe a child can smash your head into a glass table so hard it shatters? Insulting. Ridiculous. Humorous?
Hilarious how understandably freaked out she was when she found out Buel murdered his entire family and was living in her attic, but suddenly decided he was A-ok and good enough to stay just because he didn't commit the most recent murders. I guess this is a comedy?
And the ending? Ahh forget it. Nice to see the gay dean is doing well I guess.
Stupid ending to an otherwise decent series.
The Unforgivable (2021)
Ridiculous Notion
I don't know how anyone can take this movie seriously in the slightest. The idea of covering for a 5 year old is absolutely ludicrous. Wth? Seriously? So unnecessary, so unrealistic. LMAO.
Being the Ricardos (2021)
Nothing's perfect
It's true Kidman doesn't look anything like Ball, even with the failed makeup. However it's not true what some people are saying about her voice. She captured Lucille Ball so good at times I would've believed it was actually Lucy.
Javier Bardem, on the other hand, has too deep & masculine a voice. His face is also too masculine to play Desi. Despite this, he does have Desi's charm and gets the point across.
Kidman, Bardem and the rest of the players did a great job expressing what the film wanted to convey: the interesting story of Lucy & Desi's tumultuous, passionate relationship, Lucy's perfectionist drive, and the talent they gifted to the world. I wish my aunt Karyl was alive to see this because she really loved Lucy :)
Open 24 Hours (2018)
Mostly good & suspenseful
This movie reminded me of the French horror/thriller High Tension (2003)
A little bit too gory for me, not that there was a lot of murder scenes, but a couple of the ones they did show were a bit overkill.
About the ending. At first I thought it was her the whole time, killing all those people on her own, seeing her boyfriend who wasn't there, etc. But seeing as how she ended up working in a hair salon and not locked up again, it seems maybe she imagined the whole bloody scenario altogether and nobody got killed in the gas station at all? Idk, but it would've been nice if they told you instead of making you "come to your own conclusion" because I honestly expected to see her sitting in an interrogation room at the end with police officers showing her footage of her murdering all the people by herself.
Still pretty good for a slasher/horror flick.
The Stay (2021)
One flaw (lmao)...
Ok let's pretend this C movie is worth discussing. Who was Bo-Lee slicing up under the blood-sprinkled sheet in the barn? He ended up the unexpected, chew-soaked "hero" in the end... so why was that scene never explained? I guess Scott Hamm figured hey, why bother? Nobody's going to actually sit through this whole video anyway lol. Even though this seemed to be filmed entirely on a (flip?) phone, stuff like that still bothers me.
+1 star for no gratuitous nudity.
Bizarre Murders (2018)
Liked it until I realized it's 90% lies
I was really enjoying this (despite some bad jokes and making light of murder) until I realized they didn't only change the names & places but they added whatever they wanted to create more twists, etc. For example they'll say the victim's body was found when in reality, in the real story that "inspired" the episode the victim was never actually found. Or they'll say the brother was the killer even though it's false.
Taking too many liberties. Not cool.
A Werewolf in England (2020)
It's true that it's bad
So very bad, this movie, that I couldn't even finish it. Stupid writing, bad werewolf design, etc.
However, the acting really isn't that bad, especially for such a low budget movie. Except for the old Native American looking guy with long hair. I saw him in another movie recently where he played a man on his death bed for the entire movie. He's disgusting to look at and a terrible actor. Please stop casting him. Other than that, not bad acting.
This film is still not worth watching though, lol.
April Fool's Day (1986)
10/10 for being the best of its unique genre
This is a clever, intelligent, comical take on 80's horror movies, although it deserves a unique category on its own. The players seem like the typical annoying teens at first, but become more likeable as the movie progresses. And the acting is very natural by all.
My new favorite "scary" movie, I wish I saw this a long time ago. I wonder why there wasn't more made of this lovable flick...could it be that there's not enough violence and/or nudity? Well there is for me. This movie is perfection with not one, but two twists.
I appreciate this movie! Need more like it.
The Woman (2011)
Misconstrued Comedy Perhaps
I would describe this as a misogynistic comedy written by men, for men. Nothing with this much female exploitation and torture porn could allow it to even be close to feminism.
-The acting is actually good.
-The music is actually great, however not for this movie. "Distracted" is now one of my favorite songs.
-Is it supposed to be a comedy? Because many scenes were funny. The adorable little girl was cute & funny. The father said such stupid & absurd things & reactions that it was funny. However that's where any enjoyment ended.
-Not my type of movie.
Grandmother's House (1988)
I did not like this movie
This movie was not for me. I would say why but then my review will get declined for some reason. So I can only say this movie is seriously negative, especially sick for children. Well, maybe I can say that, if this review isn't declined again.