SpookyAtTheDriveIn Reviews

Crime + Punishment in Suburbia (2000)

An attempt to be arty which falls flat on it's face.

[2/10 · 16 February 2007]

I hated this film, it was one of the cheesiest things I have ever seen. I rented it because it looked different from the usual teenage thriller types. Boy, was I wrong. I don't know what I hated more; the obvious trying to be emotionally intense or the obvious attempts to be cinematic. In both cases, they fail horrifically. I can honestly say that this is one of the worst films I have ever seen. From the poor acting to the cheese-fest killing scenes to annoying, hate-able protagonist I don't know which bit made me laugh most. This is one of those teenage films that tries to be American Beauty when really it's Confessions Of A Teenage Drama Queen. I enjoyed The Covenant more, at least The Covenant KNEW it was dumb, whereas this film is just in denial. I know a lot of teenagers my age think this is "arty" and "shocking!" but most teenagers are dumb as hell anyway. If you appreciate good cinema don't rent it, it sucks. If you have no idea what the words "good cinema" and "Gus Van Sant" mean, watch Donnie Darko, a film that is effortlessly cool and moving, unlike this lumbering piece of trash. "Best soundtrack of the year"? What movie were THEY watching?

The Covenant (2006)

Why are most teenagers so dumb?

[1/10 · 14 January 2007]

It seems whenever a mainstream film company wants to make a movies for teens it concentrates on only one thing: sex. Don't get me wrong, I'm no prude but the fact that these people seem to think getting my rocks off is all I'm interested in is highly offensive. Take The Convenant, a film that relies so heavily on you finding the main characters attractive it thinks it can get away without a plot and/or a script that wasn't written by a six year old. This is essentially The Craft with (supposedly) hot guys. And, yeah, that's it. It bored me to tears. Even my friend, who usually laps us crap films, hated it. It is really stunningly bad, to the extent where it can actually be funny. I would have laughed if it wasn't for the fact that several other females in cinema attendance seemed to be enjoying it. They were accompanied by several shifty looking guys who positively curled up and died when the (really cliché) boy on boy kiss happened towards the end. Watching them squirm really was the highlight of the film. I don't think mainstream, Hollywood cinema will ever put out good films for teenagers (or, indeed, for anyone) so I think I'll give up. Unless you're a teen who likes The Pussycat Dolls, thinks Paris Hilton is "hot" and watches MTV it's like some sort of wasteland. Life's hard when you're a fifteen year old who likes art house. :( P.S. Someone should have told the Director that not all teenage girls find would be boy band members "totally HAWT LOL!!!111!!"

Uwaki na bokura (2001)

Japanese boys...having sex! Err...that's it.

[1/10 · 3 January 2007]

I didn't actually buy this film. My friend is collector of Japanese/Manga stuff and she showed me this the other day. Okay...so Yaoi is a word which means something like "Boys Love" in Japanese. Basically, in the manga world cute,teenage boys having random sex is a common occurrence. Yaoi is like a cult,where teenage girls or whoever else is interested can come to play out there...um...desires? This film took it one step forward and made a yaoi movie. You can guess what it is about. Boy sex. ANNND more boy sex. Queer as Folk anyone? The camera-work is pretty flashy and impressive. But that's about it. Woo, boy sex! If you want that, go for it. If not, don't go for it. Amen.

Lords of Dogtown (2005)

A great,engaging movie.

[8/10 · 21 October 2006]

I'm really surprised this movie doesn't have a higher rating. For me this totally surpasses the directors previous effort,Thirteen,which I thought was over rated "Kids" rip-off. Anyway,there are lot of things to like about this movie. 1.It has Rise Against in it. Woohoo! 2.The lovely John Robinson is one of the lead actors. You may recognise him as the cute blonde kid from Elephant. 3.The cinematography is beautiful. 4.Heat Ledger does his best Captain Jack impersonation. 5.The skateboarding. I'm not a huge skater myself,but this really drives the movie. It completely captures skateboarding as a pure expression and makes me long for a time where skating wasn't all about Vans and Bam Magera. Overall,it's a great movie:whether you like The Z boys or not. Skip the ending if you want to save yourself form the tears. Oh and it's only Rise Against!!!!

The Source (2001)

Carrie with Goths!

[4/10 · 20 October 2006]

As soon as this movie started, I realised I wasn't in for a high budget blockbuster type. For one it was 2am and I was watching cable. That pretty much tells you everything you need to know. The plot revolves around Reese,an introverted high schooler who looks like he shops primarily at Goths R' Us. He is tormented by memories of his Mother committing suicide for some unknown reason. Despite being quite a likable guy and despite being blessed with cute good looks,Reese is a social outcast. Possibly because he wears dark clothing,we may never know. Just to add to the "teen-angst",Reese is a talented artist who has more candles in his room than any church should. During one lonely lunchtime being tormented by jocks,Reese is befriended by fellow outcast Phobe,a flower-child eco-warrior who is unexplainably best friends with a fiery girl named Ashley and her genius brother Zack. They all go for a drive after school to hang out in a forest (because all teenager do that,y'know),where they stumble across a glowing rock which Zack quickly identifies will give them special powers. And you can guess what happens next....think Carrie meets The Craft. They take "revenge" on the people who have tormented them, which in Ashleys case is all the boys who have refused to have sex with her. She's looser than Courtney Love,this girl,and cruelly takes Reeses' virginity in the middle of some trees half an hour in. Soon Ashley is overcome with the power and everything turns very,very Carrie. There are lot's of things to like about this movie.One being cute little Reese,he can't act much but he's nice to look at. Two being that the movie bounces along happily like a techno music video and doesn't really drag at all. Before looking the movie up on IMDb,I was under the believe that this was a mid-nineties project considering the special effects are very dated. Ultimately the movie is very stilted in that it falls into ALL the teenage movie cliché's. Introverted,black-clad,depressed protagonist? Check. Rebel bad girl? Check. Maths genius who can explain away everything? Check.Plus,the friendship between the four leads is just sooo damn unbelievable.Movie directors have got to get it into their heads that these varied groups of oddballs don't exist in high schools. Goths like Goths. Hippies like hippies. Nothing inbetween. In the real world, Ashley would have beaten Phobe up years ago. Still, this is a pretty entertaining movie and the really ironic thing is that The Source is a million times better than anything teenage Hollywood has barfed out in years.