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The Little Mermaid (2023)
Just Bad In So Many Ways
You would think that with the budget put in to this it would be good. That's sadly far from the reality. They just shouldn't make a live action if they can't make it better than the original. It's way to long and felt soulless a lot of the time. The CGI was just really bad and I was disappointed in the way they created some of the characters. Save yourself the time and just re-watch the original.
The squawking song made my skin crawl listening to it. I thought with Lin Manuel Miranda signing on to do the songs it would be amazing new songs but they're far from enjoyable. The original animation was so much better for so many reasons.
The Vow (2020)
Higher Rating based on Season 2 - True Rating is 8.5
I think it's a fair criticism of season 1 that it was drawn out and had too much filler. For me I like a lot of detail and insight but I see what people mean. However, season 2 really has made the full series come into it's own.
I really like the well roundedness of showing the other side of the story from the "defendant" and sympathizer perspective. I think it's very fair and gives way more insight into the psychology and human behavior behind everything which I find fascinating. I think doing this also gives more credibility to the series. Anyone with common sense can see Rainire is guilty and there are numerous failures along the way to stop it - but it's undeniable he's a master manipulator.
I personally loved the Nancy Saltzman perspective. I understand how people could majorly dislike her, but she was always a person I found perplexing. During the first season I never felt she fit the mold of a vile person. Did she subconsciously turn a blind eye - that's definitely possible. However, it didn't make sense to me that she would be a direct "co-conspirator" in a way nor would she let things continue if she REALLY knew what was going on. I think it's easy looking back to see everything but when you're in the middle of it for a decade and it's your entire life, it would be hard for anyone to be objective. Of course we have to keep in mind she's going to also have the incentive to make herself look good, but I've found her to be very genuine and provide valuable insights.
I thought it was clever for the court scenes to be animated in the way they were. I also thought the perspective of the journalist covering the case was interesting. I feel it flows better than Season 1 also.
Hellraiser (2022)
Very Disappointed - Need a David Fincher Student at a Minimum
I'm a big fan of the first 2 Hellraiser movies as well as the novella. I think Clive Barker is fantastic and I was so excited when I heard he was going to be involved. I read some of the comic books too. I love horror movies but oddly enough I'm not a big gore fan. After seeing the initial trailers I was optimistic about this...
I cannot believe how bad this movie ended up being. It was so disheartening because I saw the trailers and was very hopeful.
Overall:
I've seen this noted before and boy was it true. It really was a very 13 ghosts type film. I think the comparisons from 13 ghosts come not just from the storyline but the lighting/set design also. Hellraiser should be gritty and look like a David Fincher film (Seven, Fight Club) not like the movie Scream (where that "Hollywood" style lighting actually worked for that type of horror movie). I don't understand how anyone who's a fan of Hellraiser couldn't see that the direction for this movie was the exact opposite of what they chose to do.
However, I did like the look and feel of the initial few scenes. I felt the shots, clothing, and characters reminded me very much of a scene from the Hellraiser comic books.
The Cenobites:
I'm still in shock over how plastic/rubbery they looked. Anyone who's a Hellraiser fan would have expected them to hire a qualified team for this aspect. The first introduction of the full cenobite group was just terrible. The sounds were ok but they had to make sure the cenobites were diverse (eye roll). The costumes weren't dark and gritty at all, they looked like they were reused from the 5th element or something. The cenobite "actress" who was in the scene with the other cenobites was terrible. It was like she was acting like what she thought a creature should act like and it was so obviously inserted to fit a quota instead of choosing someone who was right for the role regardless of any immutable characteristics one way or another.
Pinhead:
The Pinhead look seems like she has potential as a good actress/pinhead. However, the overall look/realism of it needs to be completely redone. I genuinely can't believe how fake the prosthetics looked. The pearls - I mean, come on, it just doesn't make sense. Make them rusty and gritty. Maybe they were going for the pleasure/pain metaphor but it completely failed. However, the voice was perfect and her walk deminer was pretty good. I will say the scene between the friend (forgot her name) and the new pinhead was really good (minus the prosthetics). The neck parts were unexpected and made it scarier without being excessive gore. That's how a lot of the film should have been done.
Riley:
Riley definitely grew on me. I was apprehensive at first, but as it went on, she did feel very authentic to the character. Had they done a full-on remake (thank god they didn't) but I could definitely see her being Kirsty too. I imagine that Kirsty was some of the inspiration for this character also. Her acting was really good.
The brother who is in the "couple":
Certainly put there for obvious reasons in the modern era, butI think it's relevant to the original story in a way. Clive Barker is gay and that makes sense in the storytelling. It's from his mind originally so that would be a logical inclusion in the modern day because he likely didn't feel comfortable when he originally wrote the story or adaptation. I thought the brother was a good actor but the brother's BF wasn't the best choice. His acting skills went up and down throughout. I think the character of the BF was interesting and I like the combination of him and Riley but I think they should have chosen a more consistent actor that didn't go up at the end of a lot of his sentences.
The music/soundtrack:
One of the best parts of the original movies is the intense soundtrack, especially with the bells when the cenobites are around. An F minus on this one. When they did insert music from the original soundtrack like everything else in the movie, they made it lighter when they should have either kept it the same or even more dramatic/darker. It's kind of mind-boggling to me. I feel like this one should be a no-brainer.
Roland (the crazy owner guy):
Could he be more cliché? It would have been interesting had the "bad boyfriend" turned out to be the one really in control rather than the obviousness of every character scenario this guy would have. He's not a bad actor or anything but it's just the most cookie-cutter cliché moments throughout. While his form of torture was interesting in a way, his prosthetics were equally as terrible as everyone else's.
The boyfriend:
Overall, the actor was ok but I just didn't think he was the best selection for the role. This is the role I actually think the right (had to remove what I really want to say otherwise my review will be censored). As noted previously, it would have been interesting had we thought the obvious person in control, Roland, didn't end up the person in control and this character did. I predicted after I saw the "6 years later" part he would be the dude that would use her as a sacrificial lamb. It was obvious that his relationship to her was to show what an empty person he is. However, I think that was the logical, right way to go.
The good parts they should carry over:
The re-configuration of the boxes was great. Loved the look, loved the trigger points, etc. Really liked the categories of the different configurations laid out in the book Riley found. I think the blood triggering it made more sense also.
The CGI Leviathan was actually really good, I was surprised especially since a few other moments of CGI in the movie weren't the greatest.
Loved the voice of Pinhead. I thought that was really well done.
The van transformation scene was really good. Had a little Friday the 13th vibe to it.
Final thoughts:
Hulu should take every spare dime they can and pay a very talented crew of prosthetic designers. I know doing this well isn't easy, it's an art form and that's why they need to hire the right people.
If they would just commit and push the envelope a little and worry less about the identity politics of everything, they're capable of making a great movie. They also need a director/cinematographer who is a David Fincher acolyte. Especially if you're going to try and do something that's part of a franchise, they need to decide to commit to something fully in a uniquely modern way or don't waste the money.
FYI - I'm a female so this is from my perspective.
Joe Millionaire: For Richer or Poorer (2022)
Expected Terrible - Was Pleasantly Surprised
I went into this thinking typical Bachelor premise/trash TV - ESPECIALLY because it's by some of the same people that did Jersey Shore, but I was pleasantly surprised. Reality TV is always a spectrum of being contrived to flat out scripted, but I did feel a certain level of genuineness from this after a certain point. I liked how even though there was drama, there was a good amount of comradery especially among the two "Joes". I liked the occasional "breaking the 4th wall" moments. I feel like they actively looked at many of the things wrong with this genre and improved on some of it. My best recommendation is push through to episode 3ish, after that they seemed to get their own show voice. I think if you like reality TV, there's no reason why you wouldn't enjoy this show. If they do a season 2, I would watch it.
The Amber Ruffin Show (2020)
Just not funny
Plain and simple: Not funny, not entertaining - there's a lot of other people that should have a show before her.
The Act (2019)
Could have been a 10
I really liked this show. I thought the actors were amazing and the way it was presented/shot/edited was really well done.
BUT I can only give it 8 stars because even though it "Based on a true story" and artistic license is ok - it really, really annoyed me the things they chose to change and make inaccurate. It's a bunch of little things that didn't need to be changed - they're all clearly documented in video and records. It makes the whole thing not credible. To start A) Her father wasn't a totally absent jerk as they make him seem B) The singing between them wasn't a duet and wasn't that song C) Her lawyer was male not female D) The neighbors were portrayed totally incorrectly. This may seem like nitpicking but for me, it makes me not trust most of what was shown if they're willing to make such dumb choices on little things.