Myssi from McF Reviews

M (III) (2018)

Stay away

[1/10 · 4 March 2020]

It's only weird and graphic footage slapped together and made some screaming on the background. The forced art aspect make no sense and the movie aspect is so amateur that it hurts. Not ever the promise to see Anna Eriksson nude can keep me watching this dumpster fire.

Stay away!

Slipstream (2007)

"I have a question: Who wrote this piece of crap?"

[1/10 · 19 February 2008]

Yep, the topic is a straight quote from the movie and I think it's pretty accurate. I was so bored to dead with this pointless effort. All the flashes etc. making no sense after first 20 minutes is just bad film making + If you are epileptic, you would have died at least five times already. Of course all the David Lynch fans would raise a flag for this kind of turkey to be "the best film ever made" because it doesn't make any sense AND when it doesn't make any sense it's got to be art, and art movie is always good. Right? I say WRONG. This kind of artificial art grab is just a pathetic way to try to show that you're a good film maker. Anthony Hopkins as a excellent actor should just stay acting.

The Man Who Wasn't There (2001)

Unique modern day old classic movie

[8/10 · 30 July 2004]

It's in black & white, directed by weird Joel Coen and starring controversial Billy Bob Thornton. Does it sound boring or even bad? Guess again..

Movie was full of classic cinematic magic. Makers really have studied old movies and mixed up modern day storytelling to make the movie look and feel excellent. All the pictures were fixed at their best and the result was just pure genius, just the right thing to show slow and little depressed mood of the film. All the actors were giving a great performance and they fit to their characters extremely well. Billy Bob Thornton as a chain smoking little talking dull barber was giving a performance of his life. Excellent work!

`The Man who wasn't there' is really a different kind of film comparing what Hollywood nova days do. It is a successful mix of classic old film and the modern day talent of filmmaking. Calm but strong storytelling in slow pace is not boring at all instead the movie was really hooking and just wanted you to know what will happen next. I'm sure it's a keeper in a film history in its own way.

7.5(7)/10

13 Going on 30 (2004)

Teflon covered basic chick flick

[3/10 · 27 July 2004]

Actually this movie carries two different but very used movie themes within. First there is this basic school theme where all the students are categorized to certain roles. Somebody is famous other one is a loser and so on. You know how it goes? Second theme what's been mixed up is usual love story where girl meets boy, they fall in love and then there's problems… Combining these two themes to a single movie `13 going on 30' gives a little bit of fresh touch to the genre but not enough to be anything special.

Actually the movie is pretty harmless. There's nothing so annoying in it or it's not too long or anything. Maybe that's one of its problems. The movie is just too flat, kind a like neutral; it just doesn't make you react in any way. It doesn't make you cry, or laugh. During the movie I just found myself watching the movie and I started to think that this movie really don't touch my on any level. This is a movie that you will forget almost immediately after the end credits have faded away.

Jennifer Garner is making a decent job as a main character. Her acting skills are briefly lost on couple of scenes but mainly she manages to be pretty believable. Mostly it's the story what is forced to be told in certain length that makes some things in a movie just too unnatural or stupid looking and believing in.

Peaking in to the mind of 13 year old girl is an interesting idea but unfortunately this movie isn't getting enough from the subject. I would guess that there are plenty of teenage girls who love this movie but what it comes to men; the only guys who are watching this and liking it are enjoying the picture just because of Jennifer Garner. Overall the movie is not bad, it is just too neutral to be anything else than unnecessary.

3/10

I, Robot (2004)

Something old, something new, something borrowed, and something blue.. Still really good!

[8/10 · 22 July 2004]

I founded pretty much BORROWED things from I Robot. It's a bit of Matrix, Star Wars (New Episodes), Blade Runner, Minority report and Equilibrium but it still manage to be enough original to keep my interest on pretty good. It shows that the Director has seen many times the movies listed above but he still manages to give his own vision to the screen. Of course there are classic OLD tricks used to move along the story but I robot also brought many fancy NEW twists. Effects were used pleasingly much and they fit very well to the screen although there were scenes where you ended up thinking that; am I playing video game or what? But it didn't principally bother me. Overall the movie was technically very impressive.

Plot itself isn't anything very unique (once again references to the movies above). You can presume many coming events but to counterbalance it also gives you couple of surprise elements and is capable enough to carry its duties decently to the end. As a genre Sci-Fi is my favorite one and I robot as a Sci-Fi film satisfied my needs very well. Atmosphere in movie is believable and the mood was right (little BLUE like in Blade runner). World wasn't anything super Hi-tech creations, only a pretty natural looking common day buildings with Sci-Fi enhancements. Characters are decently written and especially Will Smith is doing a fine job as a character what seems to be just a right one for him.

Adding all together I would say that there would have been possibility to make the movie a little bit longer. Some questions remain open and interesting world would have need more time to introduce it's self to the audience but I really liked the movie. I robot is a fluent combination of Sci-Fi & action film.

8/10

50 First Dates (2004)

Would have become a decent drama

[5/10 · 20 July 2004]

50 first dates was one of the big romantic comedies of this year. It contains big actors and it had major marketing behind it. I'm pretty neutral when it comes to Adam Sandler because he has couple of decent comedies but many very bad also. Drew Barrymore has convinced me just once in a good comedy (The Wedding Singer), and that one time she acted with Adam Sandler so I started watching this movie with little expectation.

Movie was following pretty normal comedy line. It was made with certain formula, kind a like that it have to please a certain amount of audience. In itself it's not that bad thing, the movie was sometime funny but it didn't bring anything new to the comedy field. Also it shows that makers have to put a brake on some of the jokes just to keep the movie in that certain formula.(when they learn to make movies in more artistic way and less with dollar bills in their eyes --> I bet that the movies would be much better and they would have as much as audience than they have now, or ever more?) But now, back to the review:

I found 50 First dates a bit of sad movie. There are couples of things witch made tears in my eyes and made me feel sorry for the character. It might have been better idea to make a drama from the movie because it handles such a `dramatic?' subject. Memory loss might have been a funny idea in a text but at the latest at the filming the makers have understood that it really isn't that funny. So the result is that the movie is little confusing mixing basic Adam Sandler humor to the dramatic things. Somebody should have just leash Sandler and make an effort to make the movie a decent drama.

Although movie shows couple of pretty funny characters and couple of over top ones. There are also funny animal jokes and overall the movie runs pretty fluently. Idea of the film is interesting and not so often used. Adam Sandler is making a little tamed version of his usual `goofy' character and is giving an ok performance. Drew Barrymore is a real actress and gives her character a little more deep and realistic interpretation spiced with little sad tone. I liked it. Because this is a `Adam Sandler' movie it of course includes a funny beating scene and Rob Schneider in a funny minor role.

5/10

Shrek 2 (2004)

Two ogre thumbs up!

[8/10 · 13 July 2004]

I really am a fan of the first Shrek. It wasn't a highest technical achievement in animation but it was written unbelievable well. All the characters were excellent and the movie had just the right gross humor on it. Of course I was excitingly waiting the sequel. Who wouldn't?

Trailer for the Shrek 2 was given to audience pretty long time ago. When I saw it I thought that they have ruined the idea. Trailer showed only couple of boring jokes, basic characters and that's all? I was wondering that why did they had to make a sequel only to collect extra money with name Shrek? After seeing the movie I have to admit that I had thrown the towel too early.

In the very beginning, movie grabs you in with fast paced jokes and fluent introduction of Shrek's & Fiona's honeymoon. It didn't go long to me to realize that the trailer was not a usual spoiler but instead it was just telling that Shrek 2 is coming and showing only the obvious. All the magnificent jokes and funny plot twist were left to the movie giving excellent surprise to the audience. Once again the storytelling is fantastic feeding the viewer with clips of the all hit movies from couple of years and mixing many fairy tale characters in it very well. It shows that makers really have put effort to make the film as fluent as possible tweaking every singly detail and picture to their finest. All Characters are extremely well written and the voice talents are giving their best; special credits to remarkable Eddie Murphy as a Donkey (Noble steed). Also the great variation of music is played during the movie and it fits in the mood very well.

Shrek 2 really salutes the first movie and turns out to be one of the year's best movies and extremely good sequel. And for those who are knocking theater door to get out before the end credits have even started: I suggests you to check the credits, you will be rewarded greatly.

Van Helsing (2004)

Not so serious monster smash

[5/10 · 12 July 2004]

Movies like Blade and underworld opened the doors of vampires and werewolves to the big audience once again. Of course this means that there are vultures who want their share of the tasty and rich corpse. This could be a good thing, but in this case it's not. For example comparing Van Helsing to Blade the difference is that Blade is a good movie and comparing to the Underworld difference is that Underworld has credible filming. Sorry Van Helsing…

Movie is about this radical monster hunter called Van Helsing. Actor Hugh Jackman as Van Helsing is just walking through the movie with basic routine. Nothing special is transferred to the screen. I miss the Wolverine attitude what Hugh gave in X-Men.

Movie's worst problem (after that annoying idiot sidekick who is forced to tag alone with Mr. Helsing) is that it tries too much to please everybody. Movie is bit of comedy, action, fantasy, `romance?' and horror. Combining all these factors make the movie only to be below average in every category. It can't be a good action film because it's too busy trying to be scary and so on.. Well the makers of the film have really wanted to invest their multi category story by giving the film over two hours duration. It's pretty rare to have such a long time in this kind of movie but it won't work. Movie is over long and after the first hour it starts repeating itself pretty much and starts to make you pretty bored and numb.

If you have to find something good out of the film I have to give a credit of the huge amount of effects they have use. In over two hour film there is not many scenes where CGI graphics aren't used. This is a good thing because so many times effect movies have effects only couple of minutes (the scenes what you see in trailer) and that's that. Rest of the movie is just dull conversation etc. But that's a difference in Van Helsing. Unfortunately the effects used in movie are only in average level, some are almost good and some are bad. But if you like watching effects there's plenty of that in this film.

At the end just to keep the movie review in balance and remind that we are talking about a bad movie here, I have to say that the gadgets and guns Helsing were using are too over sci-fi to be only cool or funny, they were embarrassing. Keep away from this one and eat some garlic just to make sure that it keeps away from you.

The Punisher (2004)

Why am I been punished?

[4/10 · 12 July 2004]

It has been many years since the `legendary' Dolph Lungren made the first Punisher. I think that this new Punisher is only made because comic movies are so popular right now. Once again I was skeptical about the movie, after all, the first one was good in its own way :P so would this be just another unnecessary movie? Well, I saw the teaser and it promised a dark mooted, action pack with attitude so I was willing to give it a try. …I shouldn't have.

Movie started okay; with an action scene. Marks were showing that this could be a good action movie. It even amazed me to see so violent scenes in this kind of modern day Hollywood movie. Of course movie's violent didn't stand a change to the famous (there can be only one) `Dutch touch' of Paul Verhoeven but nice try anyway.

What it comes to the actors Thomas Jane was OK as The Punisher but John Travolta wasn't' anything special, he was almost bad. But it was the idiot neighbor sidekicks that were the main reason to make the movie bad. I know that they are in the comic but it surely shows that the director hasn't realized what these characters stands in the comic. He just saw an opportunity to make film funnier in a very stupid way...WHY??? After the first 20 minutes or so when The Punisher enters his new home it really sees how Director just loose the grip of the movie and just starts to wonder what to do next. Drama and comedy are mixed and the result is confusing. You don't know what should be funny and what should be more dramatic. Actually only funny parts are the couple of cool death brought by the punisher and the parts which should be funny are just giving you traumatic feelings. Plot introduces couple of interesting and essential characters who could be crucial to the movie but forgets them totally later on. What's with this?

Enjoyed dark mood of the film is gone after first 30 minutes and the Punisher turns out to be just another typical Hollywood action movie without anything good to say about it. Between the action scenes movie is very boring and unnecessary. Action scenes aren't anything special either and those stupid sidekicks are just killing you. The end of the movie kind a like promises a sequel but I hope that the makers realizes soon enough to cut the wings of this turkey before it makes more damage. I suggest you find the Mr. Lungrens version of the movie and just forget about this one.

Spider-Man 2 (2004)

Spiderman just got better..BIG TIME!

[8/10 · 8 July 2004]

The first Spiderman was an OK movie but nothing that special so I didn't have big expectations for the Spiderman 2. I went to see it just because I thought that it would be a good action effect rally just to enjoy in a big theater. It turned out to be something much more…I was surprised positively…actually I was amazed.

Makers really had put their best to the screen. Script was extremely well written and included very good little details what made the movie going even more fluently. Dialogues had a good tone and fit to the actors mouth very well. The Director Sam Raimi dared to use some camera tricks etc. what he used to use in his earlier productions giving the Spiderman 2 more grown up look. Humor was clever, action was nice and effects were used a lot but they weren't dominating the movie. Couple of `fly around the city' effects were too CGI but it didn't slow down the movie. Everything was balanced nicely and it felt that nothing was shown in the movie without purpose. Camera angles and the cutting were really giving a comic look to the movie what gave me a nostalgic feeling. You could almost see yourself turning the pages of some old Spiderman comic.

For the serious fans this movie is serious eye candy. As a trademark of almost all (or all) Sam Raimi movies you can find legendary Bruce Campbell here playing a good cameo role. There is also a hilarious chainsaw scene what is a pure reference to the evil dead movies. Kirsten Dunst's nipples through her shirt were shown in the first film (it started pretty much talk in States?) and yes they are shown once again in this sequel. Good old Sam. :) Spiderman is also making a lot of new amazing athletic fancy tricks in a good old comic book way. There are plenty of other little details and things to find from the movie. Keep your eyes open.

Spiderman 2 really raises the bar of action (especially comic translations) movies and forces you to think that it's time to take these kinds of movies more seriously. You really can put this movie to the upper level where the quality movies are. The movie is giving something to everyone and still can keep the quality of the film high. Way to go Raimi! We want to see this more!

Torque (2004)

I want to ride my bicycle...with FULL THROTTLE!

[5/10 · 6 July 2004]

Torque came up on me as a totally surprise. I had never before even heard from such a movie before seeing it. This is usually a good thing because then you don't have any prejudices against the film you're about to watch. So I started watching the movie from clear table..

The movie turned out to be `the Fast and the Furious' all over again but with motorcycles. Like in Furious the plot of Torque is extremely thin and consumed. Writers have walked through door where the fence is lowest just mixing good guys, bad guys, police and possible threat in the same soup where you have ultimate fast bikes. You might think that this is a bad thing but in Torque it's not that bad. Movie is well shot and with decent editing it turns out to be pretty entertaining package. It shows that the makers have had money with them: color scheme is nice, quality of picture is high (they have used good cameras), CGI effects fit surprisingly well in the movie and are good looking and the camera man has used a plenty of tricks. Movie also shows a couple of cool motorcycle moves and even some of them is impossible the make it doesn't slow down the pace of the movie. It's funny to watch them although I have to give a minus from the last effect trick where the maker's just went too far --> you know what I mean when you see the film.

Actors aren't anything special but they managed to bring the needed thing to the screen; Charismatic faces, bad ass attitude and some sort of coolness. Ice Cube isn't giving his best but he still is pretty believable gang boss. I do not know anything about bikes but I suppose that some bike fans could wet their pants because of the cool bikes in the movie. Well, I think that this movie is giving the same feeling to the bikers than `Fast and the Furious' did to the car folks. Is that good or bad thing, I really can't say. I'm not so keen in cars or bikes. The main thing is that movie is working well.

Don't get me wrong Torque isn't an Oscar winning great spectacle in film history. No, it's far from that BUT if you are looking a fast paced action pack what lets you put you brains in to the off mode and just enjoy the ride while sipping your ice cold beer after long and frustrating work day Torque might just do the trick.

Garfield: The Movie (2004)

Just for the kids

[3/10 · 5 July 2004]

When I first heard about the Garfield movie I had my doubts. After I saw the trailer I thought that this won't work. Now I saw the picture and realized that I was right.

First things first; Garfield itself did not work. It didn't look like Garfield at all. The best part of the movie was to follow this oversized hairy ball move around and do things (I mean the animation) BUT it wasn't Garfield and after 5 minutes you had seen it all. I have to give a minus that all the other animals were real. They should have made all the animals with computer or use real animals but mixing them like this was not a good decision. Well, the budget is limited so what can you do? Plot ignored main things of the comic a lot or the things were only presented shortly and just with couple of lines (I hate Mondays etc.) It also had a major conflict compared to the comic with one of the characters. I don't know what kind of range of audience the writers had in their mind while writing the story but it sure isn't as wide as the comic has. The movie is underestimating the audience with its clumsy and obvious jokes included with stupid and all seen bumbling and stumbling. And what's with the singing number in the middle of the movie? Argh..

What it comes to the actors I just HATE when they are overacting everything? In The Garfield movie decent actors are direct to be over the top happy, clumsy or stupid. I know that kids like that kind of stuff but I thought that this movie would have been more than just for the kids, after all original comic is. At least the movie is only one hour and 15 minutes long approx. That's the maximum length what kids can stay put while watching movies. In this case I found myself among the kids because after first 30 minutes of the movie I found myself yawning and nervously turning in my chair. Like I said before, I had seen it all.

Overall the movie did not bring anything new to the audience. It's the same content we have seen thousands of times only with new name. Digital Garfield isn't anything special as an effect and the actors are just wasting their and my time. It's got to be a hard job to translate a famous comic to the big screen but if you are doing it without any skills I think you have drop it or let someone capable enough to do it.

The Abyss (1989)

My personal favorite

[10/10 · 2 July 2004]

As a huge movie fan people attend to ask me my favorite movie. It's difficult to answer because there are so many excellent movies but if I'm forced to name one I always say Abyss. Oh yes, Abyss is the movie what includes all the major parts what makes a great film for me. It's sci-fi, it's action, it make you cry and it's 100% James Cameron quality

Movie is about underwater oil workers which are involved in a nuclear sub conflict what got something to do with extra-terrestrial life forms. The best part in the movie, (in every James Cameron movie) is that even the plot is pure sci-fi it has been made so well that it doesn't feel supernatural at all. Master film `tweaker' Cameron has made the film with such a focused way that you can almost feel yourself diving with the crew. Part of the Cameron movie realism is that he tries to shoot everything in real places like in Abyss the actors were acting in a underwater station what was really put underwater. They were using the liquid oxygen for real and diving without any gear if that was necessary. No doubt that some actors don't want to work with Cameron anymore but the main thing is that the movies are great!

Abyss is extremely fluent movie. Plot has action and drama well balanced with fancy twists. Cutting is made with extra care giving the film a perfect mood and pace and actors are giving their best to make believable scenes. Music is powerful and when needed very beautiful as well. Cameron has taken everything out from the water element and the shots underwater are just overwhelming.

I suggested everybody to watch the director's cut of the film witch I prefer to be the one and only version having included over 30 minutes extra material compared to the theater version. In dir. Cut you'll find plenty little details and answers what are left outside of the `normal version'. This is the movie what I'll watch at least one time in a year and every time I'm surprised of its perfection.

Simply the Best!

The Passion of the Christ (2004)

Hail to the King!

[7/10 · 1 July 2004]

Two times in a row has Mel Gibson literally beat the &%"# out of audience with his spectacular one man hero stories. First time it was the Braveheart with great storytelling combining magnificent battle scenes spiced with quality love drama. Second time it's time to undress the gloves and show how great director Gibson really is in Passion of the Christ what is a living proof that nova day movie's can be made in an old fashion (art)way : Focusing to the beautiful pictures & effective soundtrack and put the dialogue way back behind. In the end the pictures are what make the movie.

I think the plot is pretty familiar to the most of the viewers so enough of that. Bible is some form of art and Mel Gibson as some form of artist has made his own vision of the Bible. That's that.

I was little a bit worried about movie when I heard that there will only little talking and it's all made in Hebrew. It's a tough challenge to make a movie work depending almost entirely to pictures and music. After I saw the movie my doubts were vanished. Passion of the Christ is truly a beautiful movie, a real piece of art in a good way. Filming is unbelievable, music fits perfectly and the story is so well written that you don't miss any English talking actors. Mel Gibson really pulls this out making very intimate and strong movie.

What comes to the movie violent I have heard plenty of people saying that this movies is too violent. I have to admit that I have seen action movies a lot but this one must be on of the most sadistic and brutalism movie I have ever seen. Main character is SO badly beaten that I really feel sorry for the guy. But I think that was the whole idea of the movie. Gibson wanted to make the beating so real that the whip plashes are felt in the audience. Watching the movie really makes you thing that 'Stop beating that man, it's enough'!!' and that's the one part what makes this movie so good. It's personal and very touching. If you are very emotional person, prepare yourself before watching the movie.

Have to admit that Gibson really knows how to direct a story to fluent movie. I salute Mr. Gibson to make a one of the best films ever. These kinds of movies are rare and should be part of the movie history.

Mindhunters (2004)

Renny's comeback!

[8/10 · 28 June 2004]

Long time we have been waiting to see the Latest Renny Harlin movie in theaters and as it finally came, it came with a bonus to all Finnish people because it was shown in Finland Before any other country in entire world. Way to go Renny! Like all the other Renny films, Mindhunters was not a exception having a bad reputation before premiere but as a fan who sees Renny as a unique action film visualist I was eager to see film.

Movie is about FBI profiler trainees who find themselves in an isolated army trainee camp island where the final exam before the real work is about to take place. Soon enough trainees find out that training has become less testing and more deadly than it should. Suspicion takes a major role when the trainees try to find out who's sabotaging the test by killing contesters one by one. I think there is no need to tell more about the blot without spoiling the entire story.

Though the blot isn't getting any Oscars of unique idea but Renny has been able dodge all the cliché pitfalls where other movies of this genre (e.g. Stallone's D-tox) have step on to. Renny really makes an effort to take everything out from this simply idea and turns the movie so fast-paced that you just find yourself enjoying the ride. Murders are surprising and made with a pinch of attitude gore. Dialogue is fluid and actors play well together in the same tone as movies atmosphere. Murderer is well hidden and although several hints are made I can sure you that there is no easy way to solve the mystery of who's the killer beforehand, I didn't. Movie is also giving a couple of good and extremely surprising blot twists behalf of actors. As a trade mark of Renny film couple of Finnish national flags are shown also in this movie and if you have quick eyes you can find the director himself playing a cameo role. I have to admit that after wondering through couple of ..well...not so good films Renny finally found his way back to the business making extremely fluent and individual action thriller what represent the elite in this movie genre as in Renny's level as much as globally.

Two thumbs up!

The Chronicles of Riddick (2004)

It was not ridiculous!

[6/10 · 21 June 2004]

As a fan of "Pitch black", hopes were high with this one. Longly awaited sequel came with a cool trailers and posters but these days it ain't a promise of a good movie yet...

This time years have past since the happenings of Pitch Black and Riddick is being hunted by bounty hunters. Opening sequence tells pretty far what is the movie style.. and it's good. Okay, have to admit that the bounty hunters were pretty stupid but don't worry they will get what they deserve. Extra points to future war scenes (bombing etc) founded in the movie what were nicely filmed and recorded. Blot includes also this major dominating race and couple of fancy "ghost like" characters but i won't reveal anymore.

Like the first movie "COR" presented unique filming and fancy colors. Camera angles and cutting of the film tells that "something different" is tried to make, and succeeded there pretty well. I think script had something borrowed from Dune but it still was refreshing and appealing in many ways comparing what we have usually seen in movies of this genre. Vin Diesel had regain his cool image after boring XXX and was beating the bad guys with a bad ass attitude. Don't take me wrong there is more than just beating and shooting in this film but scifi action with attitude was the red line here and I like it that way.

Overall movie was entertaining action kick giving a couple of good surprising twists in a way to decent ending that leaves us wanting more.

7.5 / 10