Change Your Image
Kevin Burciaga
Reviews
Ocean's Twelve (2004)
Everything I expected
Ocean's 12 was just as good as the previous installment, Ocean's 11. I enjoyed the suave music and the sophisticated camera-work. It's truly amazing that everybody in the first movie came back to make the second one. The story was just as complicated so I'll be "forced" to see it again. That won't be a problem.
This movie did a remarkable job of combining action and wit. It's not a comedy movie, but you'll be laughing because of the sharp dialog and humorous situations. Other than the thief moving his body through the lasers, there isn't one scene that shouldn't be in the movie. I can't understand why this movie has received a low rating.
Kevin
Bad Santa (2003)
Relax and have fun
Don't expect to come see dry or high brow humor here. This movie is just funny, if you sit back in your chair and relax. It isn't slapstick and it's definitely adult humor.
I'm so glad there is a movie that parodies something like Santa at the mall. Billy Bob Thornton coming in drunk and destroying the ornaments was so funny it literally took my breath away. Frequent cursing and bad behavior to the kids was key to this movie, but it was only an integral piece of the film. Bad Santa wasn't a single joke stretched for 90 minutes. Everybody in the audience was laughing throughout the duration of the movie, which proves to me there was something new and comical in almost every scene. This is unlike Christmas Vacation, which plummeted after the first 30 minutes.
Maybe this movie is so good because it contrasts so greatly with these warm and fuzzy Christmas movies. This will be a classic for years to come.
Kevin
Black Knight (2001)
Some good one-liners, but little else
I actually paid $4.20 to watch this movie, and the only funny things were a few cute lines and that was it. Martin Lawrence tried his best, but he's made far better movies.
And the time. This movie hardly lasted 90 minutes (which is actually a fortunate thing). Usually, movies that short have poor plots and little humor. This movie is no exception.
The idea is so silly. Jamal falls into a pond, trying to retrieve a necklace, and he appears in 14th century England? That sounds like a day dream to me. I guess it doesn't matter to Lawrence, who only wants to degrade people and show how much better he is than others.
Kevin
The Sum of All Fears (2002)
Good story; Affleck not good as Ryan
I gave this film a generous 7/10. The story was very realistic, especially in today's times. But Ben Affleck just wasn't the correct person to play Jack Ryan.
He wasn't nearly as good as Baldwin or Ford, simply because Affleck is 28-years-old, and most of his movies are for the women. This was an action film, and in my view, he didn't seem like the real deal. In the next Tom Clancy movie, Ryan needs to be played by an older character- someone in their late 30's or early 40's.
One more thing. The romance scenes were totally worthless, and took away the momentum of the movie. Why was the girl in the movie? So Morgan Freeman and the audience could have a good laugh at the beginning of the movie? Affleck's a pretty boy, and should stay with the chick-flicks.
Kevin
Apollo 13 (1995)
So patriotic, but thrilling
Apollo 13 has to be one of my favorite movies. There's never a moment when I lose interest, except maybe for the scene where the Lovells are drunk in their backyard. Other than that, the movie was exceptionally thrilling. And best of all, most of it's true. Good research, fellas.
It makes you feel so good about America too. Hundreds of determined men refused to lose thier comrades in the last frontier, and they brought them home. Meanwhile, the Russians lost quite a few in space.
The soundtrack is excellent, with such patriotic music played at the right times during the movie. I never get bored listening to it. Photography and camera work gets two big thumbs up as well, and to see Bill Paxton, Kevin Bacon, and Tom Hanks float made the movie much more credible.
I watch this film every six months, and everyone else should see it at least once.
Kevin
Battlefield Earth (2000)
Comical, in a bad way
Warning: Spoilers ahead
After watching this film, I no longer wonder why many directors turned down this movie. The acting was awful, the plot (as silly as it was) was just plain stupid, it was unrealistic, and Battlefield Earth had poor special effects!
I now laugh at the comments John Travolta made before this movie came out: "I want everyone to see because I was really impressed with the script." Yeah right, John, that's why, after the premiere, you said that Battlefield Earth was suppose to be bad.
Well I laughed at it all the way through. Jonnie Goodboy (creative name isn't it?), alone, saved the day for the troubled human race. Battlefield Earth became comical when Jonnie picked up books that were 1000 years old, and just needed to be dusted, to be legible. Buildings stood up, glass intact, traffic signals and cars were lying everywhere, but after 1000 years?
About 90 minutes in, I was howling. These illiterate caveman learned to use fighter jets in just a week (oh, but it was because of that simulator which taught them right? And by the way, where did the electricity to power the simulator come from?), and were taught nuclear physics on top of that. Fort Knox, with all of its gold inside, neatly stacked, was waiting for the "man-animals" for a millennium. How convenient.
If you really want to roll on the floor though, watch the scene towards the end when one single nuclear bomb blew up the entire Psychlo planet. The SFX were lousy. It looked like a jigsaw puzzle blowing to pieces.
This was the worst movie ever.