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Reviews
The Gift (2000)
Tired and unoriginal
A well constructed film, with a few moments of horror, but very unoriginal. The gift is mainly hampered by having so many stereotypical characters - the sceptical policeman, the wife beating bad guy, the village idiot, the promiscuous victim, and the brave heroine. Srictly for a rainy day - that's if you haven't got anything better to do.
Fight Club (1999)
boring, over-rated, pretentious, confused, and very silly.
Although this film was watchable for the first hour or so, it goes very rapidly downhill for the sorry remainder of it's duration. There are simply too many different ideas vying for the viewers attention. Intellectuals have found acres and acres of meaning, which David Fincher wanted them too, although he knows that he has simply made an extremely pretentious and boring mess. It's not all doom and gloom though - there are some very good set pieces in the first half of the film that actually entertained me for a while.
The Pillow Book (1995)
The Filmgoers Book Of The Truly Awful.
Since The Baby Of Macon, Peter Greenaway's brain has gone mysteriously AWOL. Whereby his films up to then were atmospheric, intellectually stimulating, and also very attractive to look at (not to mention some brilliant Michael Nyman scores), his more recent efforts must surely be vying for some of the most excruciatingly boring films ever made. The Pillow Book is unfortunately a prime example. This film lacks almost everything but originality. But originality on it's own does not always make for a good viewing experience. However, if you suffer from insomnia then i can guarantee that you will be sound asleep after about 15 minutes. Please try and ignore other users who have said that this film is a masterpiece - IT IS NOT - avoid it like the plague. You have been warned!!.
Mars Attacks! (1996)
Will Tim Burton ever make a good film??
This is just another awful film from the awful Tim Burton, which is an uneasy mixture of comedy, animation, and violence. Needless to say, it doesn't work at all. I would prefer to watch almost any sci-fi film made in the 50's than to waste my time with this commercial, crowd pleasing, down your throat trash. Watching people like Jack Nicholson and Pierce Brosnan try to be funny was simply not funny!!
The Dunwich Horror (1970)
A 'HORROR' as in awful movie
I have had this film on tape for many years, but had never got around to watching it until last week. I am very interested in horror films, and in particular some of the fairly obscure 70's productions. After having watched this film, i can't understand where the 'horror' part of the title actually occurred in the movie - maybe some other imdb users can enlighten me. Why wasn't it simply called 'Dunwich'?. This was an incredible waste of what was actually a good cast - i mean a film based on an H.P.Lovecraft work must surely have maybe a little tension, suspense, or terror?. To make matters worse, the story was not even presented in a very coherent manner - maybe that's a bit harsh as i did fall asleep once or twice - ok maybe that's when the 'horror bit' happened before anyone tells me!!.
Island of Terror (1966)
Special FX masterpiece!!
Although this film didn't have a great deal going for it, apart from some reasonable acting from Peter Cushing, it is one of those productions that hold a fair amount of charm. Yes - i'm talking about those incredibly scary monsters which seem to be a cross between a vacume cleaner and a desk lamp, and i found it so hard to sleep after the end, i had to leave the lights on all night!! (sorry, yet more sarcasm - couldn't resist it). But don't forget folks, 'science has it's risks, but the risks aren't enough to hinder progress' - this film is very relevant in todays world - maybe it should be shown to all those scientists that are advocating genetically modified food. Maybe it will cause us all to turn into silly-cates!! (if we're not already)
Scream (1996)
Excruciatingly Bad
One of the most over-hyped, boring Horror films i have ever had the misfortune of seeing. What happened to Wes Craven?, the director of Last House On The Left (very good), and The Hills Have Eyes (good).From the rave reviews that SCREAM 2 has had (presumably from the same offenders who liked SCREAM and who know NOTHING about what makes a good horror movie)i will definitely not waste my time again!!.
Beyond Rangoon (1995)
Without doubt John Boorman's worst film ever.
This film was sheer boredom from beginning to end. Ok, so i salute Boorman for raising the worldwide recognition of events in Burma, but that is all he achieves. About 10 minutes into the film i thought "oh no, here we go again", and i could have told you exactly what was going to occur in the next 80 minutes or so. Patricia Arquette was out of her depth in such a role, and her acting was wooden and unconvincing. Mind you, being saddled with such an awfully conventional script, maybe boredom set in, and was such reflected on the screen. A lot of the film was just plain laughable. At one stage, Arquette's elderly companion is shot, and he is prostrate on the ground. In the next scene, he is sprinting through the forest, obviously attempting to break the world 100 meters record! - or maybe he's just trying to run away from Boorman!!. If you find it hard to sleep one night then play Beyond Rangoon on your VCR and you'll be snoring in no time. I very rarely critisize a film as heavily as this, but in this case it is completely justified.