Reviews
Jackass Number Two (2006)
Nobody Will Ever Top These "Jackass" Stunts.
The kindest thing that I can say about "Jackass 2 Unrated" is that it is the most vile, disgusting, and repellent movie that I have ever seen in my entire life. On the other hand, I spent most of my time laughing my ass off at this hideously hilarious movie. Mind you, "Jackass 2" makes the first "Jackass" movie look extremely tame. In fact, if there is a "Jackass 3," it is going to have to top "Jackass 2" and Johnny Knoxville and his bunch are really going to have to dig deep to come up with those gags. The thing that sets "Jackass 2" apart from the previous "Jackass" is that this time when the guys aren't performing stunts to alienate other people, they punkas Ashton Kutcher might dothemselves. Some of the normal nitwit gags include riding a mini-motorcycle at high speed down a short track to a do a loop-the-loop but crashing; rolling downhill in giant caterpillar tires; and launching themselves aloft on rockets that crash only a few seconds later. The best and most nauseating stunts include milking a stallion of its semen and drinking it. Steve-O dons a bubble helmet called a fart mask and promptly chucks up when the stench of a fat man's gas hits him. Steve-O does the butt chug where his companions pour beer down a tube stuck in his rectum. One of the biggest gags involves them shaving their pubic hair to supply one of their unsuspecting own with material for a beard. Johnny Knoxville masquerades as an old man and walks through town with his testicles dangling from his shorts. Later, they pull the same stunt but this time he masquerades as an shriveled up old lady who gets her dress caught in a car door and when she walks away, it rips to show her sausage-shaped breasts. When they aren't trying to gross everybody else out, these freewheeling stunt guys see if they can keep from puking after performing some of their more objectionable gags. The opening gag is probably as stylist as any "Jackass" movie will ever get. The film opens with stirring music from "The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly" as dust rises and we see our protagonists emerge from this dust cloud with steers charging in hard pursuit after them. Think of the old TV show "Candid Camera" gone wild and you'll be prepared for what follows, unless you are of the squeamish variety. Of course, as they point out at the beginning and the ending, nobody but professional stunt men should perform these stunts. Some people would never set their eyes on this kind of nonsense and people who are easily offended should avoid it at all costs.
Banzai Runner (1987)
Nothing "Banzai" About This "Runner"
Altogether, "Banzai Runner" qualifies as a deadly dull crime chase thriller. Dean Stockwell stars as insubordinate, back-talking Nevada Highway Patrol cop Billy Baxter (he wears the NHP shoulder patch even though the DVD box label claims he is a California Highway Patrolman) who is obsessed with tracking down the speed demon that killed his brother in a highway accident a couple of years before the plot unfolds here in Phillip L. Harnage's shallow screenplay. Predictably, Baxter's obstinate, by-the-book boss doesn't approve of Baxter's vendetta. Eventually he fires him when our hero takes a joyride at 200 MPH. This leaves poor Billy high and dry without a job. Along comes his ex-wife who wants half of his house as a part of the divorce settlement, and then in walks the DEA with a proposition for Billy to go undercover, bust these road racers, and get himself out of hock. Naturally, Bill accepts the proposition without a second thought and goes undercover with his nephew. The nephew likes to catch a buzz smoking marihuana and there is a brief argument between the nephew and Billy's latest squeeze. Billy and his nephew manage to infiltrate this ring of road races, and Billy sets up a deal to buy a butt-load of cocaine. Just as the deal is about to go down, the villain's wife informs on her husband and Billy races off to save his son who has gone to buy the coke. Talk about a lack of foreshadowing, much less motivation on her part. One of the girl's here gets her kicks by stripping every time Baxter's nephew drives 10 miles over the speed limit. However, "Banzai Runner" neither has any nudity nor do the filmmakers explains its Japanese title. The photography is substandard, with too much head space in the compositions, and the shadow of the camera and crew is obvious in one scene in the desert. Stockwell doesn't cut it as an obsessive cop, but he can at least act. The only other two actors with any credibility are the villainous Billy Drago as a trigger-happy road racer and souped-up car mechanic Charles Dierkop from "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid." The only thing that director John G. Thomas does right is show off fast sports cars in several careening scenes that look fast but do nothing to enhance the film's lack of suspense. Much of the story occurs off-camera, for example, the death of Billy's brother. Most of the supporting cast looks like they haven't spent enough time in front of the camera to behave with any sense of credibility. Indeed, there is a happy ending to this 87-minute melodrama, but as a whole "Banzai Runner" proves to be a bore. Put the brakes on your wallet before you buy this superficial potboiler.
The Hired Gun (1957)
Predictable But Well-Made Oater
Rory Calhoun co-produced this modest but predictable oater about a professional gunman who tracks down an escaped murderer who is scheduled to get hanged at the outset of this tightly-made western. Clocking in at 63 minutes, "The Hired Gun" is entertaining potboiler with several future stars, such as Chuck Connors and Vince Edwards, fleshing out a convincing cast. As this saga opens, Judd Farrow (a pre-"Rifleman" Connors)enters the town dressed as a minister and rescues convicted killer Ellen Beldon (Anne Francis of "Bad Day at Black Rock")from the gallows. It seems that Ellen killed her husband during an argument at a party. When everybody went outside to see what the commotion was all about,they found her standing over her dead husband's body with a smoking revolver at her feet. Veteran character actor John Litel of "Dodge City" (1939), who used to co-star in Warner Brothers westerns, such as "Dodge City" (1939)and "San Antonio" (1945), as a stalwart by sympathetic character, plays the upset father of the deceased. He wants to see his dead stepson's wife get her pretty little neck stretched. After she escapes with Connors and heads to New Mexico, which refuses to extradite her to Texas, Litel hires tough guy gunslinger Gil McCord (Calhoun), and he pins on a badge from the local lawman to make everything legitimate. Of course, after Rory manages to abduct her and take her back to face justice, he begins to have doubts about her guilt. Harold J. Marzoratti's widescreen black and white cinematography is a pleasure to watch. The outdoors scenery is appropriately rugged and the frontier towns look like they are on the frontier instead of a tree-planted studio backlot, so everything has a dusty, rough-hewn, realistic feel. Francis is good as the female killer. Although Connors doesn't get as much screen time, he makes an indelible impression while hot-headed Vince Edwards makes a suitable nemesis for Rory in the final quarter-hour. The real pleasure of watching "The Hired Gun" is watching a supremely confident Rory Calhoun give another solid, if uninspiring performance. Calhoun has presence and you believe that he is as leathery as he looks on the big screen. "The Hired Gun" recalls the kind of westerns that Randolph Scott made with director Budd Boetticher at about the same time. Finally, don't overlook Guinn "Big Boy" Williams of "Santa Fe Trail" in a minor supporting role as a tough hombre that Rory has to lash up with rawhide strips to sweat the truth out of him.