NCIS (TV Series)
Once Upon A Tim (2019)
Wilmer Valderrama: Nick Torres
Quotes
-
Timothy McGee : Your mom says the twins are already asleep.
Delilah Fielding : [Sarcastically] So that's all it takes- just a little shooting. We should do this everyday.
Nick Torres : Sorry, but McGee, uh, hit the limit of how many people he can shoot in his apartment.
[Torres chuckles]
Delilah Fielding : What is he talking about?
Timothy McGee : I do not know. But I packed your bag here. Ready to go to your mom's.
Delilah Fielding : *What* is he talking about?
Timothy McGee : Not a big deal, all right. but a couple of years ago when you were in Dubai. There was a break-in here in the apartment and uh, I shot someone.
Delilah Fielding : *In* our apartment?
Timothy McGee : Yeah.
Delilah Fielding : And you failed to mention this to me!
-
Timothy McGee : I'm sorry, who are you?
DOD IG Inspector Richard Sullivan : Dick Sullivan. Deputy Inspector General, DOD.
Ellie Bishop : Does Gibbs know about this?
Leroy Jethro Gibbs : [entering] Rule 99.
Jack Sloane : "Never tell Gibbs he's being audited."
Nick Torres : That's not a real thing.
-
Ellie Bishop : Hey, can I borrow a pen?
Nick Torres : No way. Get your own.
Ellie Bishop : What? Since when did become a pen Nazi?
Nick Torres : Ever since I found out that pens are not expensable.
Ellie Bishop : That's crazy.
Nick Torres : Yeah, you know what's crazy is that my protein powder is not expensable, either.
Ellie Bishop : Yeah, I would file that one under "duh".
-
Ellie Bishop : Can't believe you still have it.
Timothy McGee : Yeah, it's the first PC I ever built. Made me realize that...
Nick Torres : You would never have a girlfriend?
Timothy McGee : Um, I've had plenty of girlfriends, thank you.
Ellie Bishop : Yeah, one even helped him build this.
Timothy McGee : No, actually that was just a girl-dash-friend.
Ellie Bishop : Oh.
Nick Torres : Oh, so, like, pathetic-dash-disturbing.
-
Jack Sloane : This is insane. I've never been audited in my life.
DOD IG Inspector Richard Sullivan : Well, if it makes you feel better, it wasn't just you. Agent Gibbs' entire team was sloppy with their expense reports.
Ellie Bishop : What?
Timothy McGee : Wait, what?
Ellie Bishop : We're being audited?
Nick Torres : Did you think I was organizing my receipts for fun? No, that's something that dorks who build their own computers do.
-
Jimmy Palmer : So, what do we have here?
Nick Torres : Dead Navy contractor.
Jimmy Palmer : That's the third one this year.
Nick Torres : Am I the only one that doesn't keep track of these things?
-
Leroy Jethro Gibbs : What have we got?
Ellie Bishop : An empty notebook. Pages torn out. Oh, wait. I see some indentations.
[Gibbs hands her a pencil]
Ellie Bishop : Oh.
Nick Torres : You know, pens are not expensable.
Ellie Bishop : [raising the indentations with the graphite tip] All right, I got some numbers here. 4, 20, 19, 94.
Timothy McGee : That's funny. That's the exact same date that I got my, uh...
Ellie Bishop : Z28?
Timothy McGee : Yeah, back when I lived in...
Ellie Bishop : Hampstead?
Nick Torres : Uh... can someone explain to me what just happened?
Timothy McGee : That's one of my old computer passwords.
Leroy Jethro Gibbs : Well, McGee, why does a dead guy have one of your old computer passwords in his pocket?
-
Leroy Jethro Gibbs : What do we got?
Nick Torres : Phone records. Nothing too exciting. Bunch of calls to mom, sis, yada yada, but the last call that Kane made before he disappeared is really interesting, to a high school in the middle of nowhere.
Timothy McGee : Oh, you gotta be kidding me.
Ellie Bishop : Don't tell me it's yours.
Timothy McGee : Well, one of them. We moved every time my dad transferred.
Leroy Jethro Gibbs : You sure you didn't go to high school with this guy?
Timothy McGee : Boss, I'm-I'm positive that I did not go to high school with this guy. I remember everyone at the school. I couldn't get out of there fast enough.
-
Nick Torres : I'm Special Agent Nick Torres. NCIS.
Mister Lewis : I'm actually late for a rehearsal right now. We're doing "Cats", again, so, um, if you could, uh...
Nick Torres : Ask you a few questions while we're standing here? Yeah, I like the idea.
-
Nick Torres : So, I talked to the front office. Uh, Kane called, asked to talk to the guy who runs the computer lab, an Andrew Lewis.
Timothy McGee : You're kidding. Mr. Lewis? Can't believe he's still here. Yeah, I was never really a fan, but I'm sure the guy remembers me.
[recognizing a passing faculty member]
Timothy McGee : Oh, Mr. Lewis.
Mister Lewis : Yeah, and who are you?
Timothy McGee : It's me, Tim McGee.
Mister Lewis : Doesn't ring a bell.
Nick Torres : Well, made quite an impression.
-
Timothy McGee : Our records show that last week, you talked to an Edward Kane.
Mister Lewis : Mm... no. No, I didn't. Uh, in fact, I've never heard the name before.
Timothy McGee : [showing him Kane's picture] So you don't know this guy?
Mister Lewis : No. Anything else?
Nick Torres : You should pay more attention to your star pupils.