I can now say that I have truly watched the worst movie ever made.
20 Reviews
What a terrible movie
aidansmama7728 April 2019
E for effort
wyckes1325 May 2019
Shakepeare would be jealous of how much of a tragedy this "movie" is.
Futures_End2 December 2018
"Watch If You Dare" is a pathetic excuse of a horror movie that neither comes off as taking itself seriously or self-aware. What it does in its terrible 4 stories is showcase gore and pass it off as horror while completely missing the mark on what horror actually is. I felt so offended by this trash I felt inclined to write a review about it.
The first story is called 'The Stylist' and makes absolutely no sense. It doesn't explain anything about anyone or the scenario and falls into replacing any sort of suspense or intrigue with blood, rubbing into the face of the audience screaming "ISN'T THIS SCARY?!"
The second story 'Ink' is somehow even more bland, boring and nonsensical making you ask questions (if you've somehow stayed awake), but not the good kind. It makes you think who decided this was good enough not only to write, but to pitch, produce, direct and release. It doesn't tell you a story before throwing you into their cheap gore special effects that would take you out of the movie even though this doesn't have you in it in the first place.
The third story 'Foodies' is PAINFULLY long and one of the worst of the already utterly terrible anthology. The characters are painful to watch creating a boring viewing experience without gripping its viewers or creating any product worth watching. Frankly I can't think of anything more to say about this boring, boring short. It's BORING.
Finally 'Knob Goblins' felt like 4 seconds which is a refreshing change of pace because it meant this nightmare was over quickly. I actually have no idea what I watched but I thought it was funny in an extremely awkward way. This has no purpose of anything.
Overall "Watch If You Dare" is only called this because it challenges you to sit through too many minutes of terrible storytelling, directing and acting. Watch if you hate yourself.
The first story is called 'The Stylist' and makes absolutely no sense. It doesn't explain anything about anyone or the scenario and falls into replacing any sort of suspense or intrigue with blood, rubbing into the face of the audience screaming "ISN'T THIS SCARY?!"
The second story 'Ink' is somehow even more bland, boring and nonsensical making you ask questions (if you've somehow stayed awake), but not the good kind. It makes you think who decided this was good enough not only to write, but to pitch, produce, direct and release. It doesn't tell you a story before throwing you into their cheap gore special effects that would take you out of the movie even though this doesn't have you in it in the first place.
The third story 'Foodies' is PAINFULLY long and one of the worst of the already utterly terrible anthology. The characters are painful to watch creating a boring viewing experience without gripping its viewers or creating any product worth watching. Frankly I can't think of anything more to say about this boring, boring short. It's BORING.
Finally 'Knob Goblins' felt like 4 seconds which is a refreshing change of pace because it meant this nightmare was over quickly. I actually have no idea what I watched but I thought it was funny in an extremely awkward way. This has no purpose of anything.
Overall "Watch If You Dare" is only called this because it challenges you to sit through too many minutes of terrible storytelling, directing and acting. Watch if you hate yourself.
Oh Myyyyyy
arfdawg-113 January 2019
You can travel far and wide.
You can attend every obscure film event. Every movie conference. Every screening of every movie ever made on this planet and planets yet to be discovered.
But honestly, you will not find a worse movie ever made.
Honestly.
Stupid and totally pointless waste of time and film
taw-0480920 July 2019
Warning: Spoilers
The first skit seems totally random and without reason. The hair dresser's neck is shown to be severely scarred and/or burned, with no explanation or context as to why, and also no explanation on why she is obsessed with scalping people and using said scalps as wigs. I wish I could say this was the worst part, but it only gets dumber from here.
Possibly the worst movie I've ever seen
fasciangelica12 July 2019
Oh I dare and it didn't dare me enough
UniqueParticle13 June 2019
Definitely nailed the disturbing aspects otherwise this anthology movie is super weird and terrible! Very awkward and mediocre. I don't have much to say, this is one you'd wanna watch free like I did on Hulu or get it cheap in a bargain bin.
Watch if you want to be disappointed.
13Funbags15 October 2019
Better than expected anthology collection.
kannibalcorpsegrinder6 November 2019
An anthology feature revolving around various terrifying encounters.
The Good Stor(ies): The Stylist-Taking a new customer at the salon, a stylist begins to work on a regular as normal when finds her plan has worked as she falls unconscious in her chair during the procedure. When she begins to enact her plan of folicular thievery, unexpected incidents begin to hinder her plans. This one was an extremely effective entry. The fact that this one is all about building up more to the next extreme moment, as the initial banality of cutting her hair gives way to the victim being drugged that slowly comes to be revealed before the brutal scalping sequence takes place. With the victim coming to life only one of the potential hindrances and an epilogue detailing the nuttiness, this one does have a lot to like about even if this is a slightly low-key effort to start one of these efforts off being the lone flaw.
Foodies-Receiving an invitation to an underground restaurant, a restaurant owner and his chef arrive at the secret location and meet other foodies invited to partake in the evening. when he realizes the true intent in their meeting, he tries to find a way of getting away in one piece. This one ending up being quite a fun effort. The quick attempts at world-building here makes for a nice dive into this universe with it's commercials and rumors, while the community of the elitist chefs and foodies compared to the more general attitude of the other two who are just makes for a fine contrast between them. The entire twist is entirely predictable and seen coming a mile away, but the black comedy of the situation not only gives this one a comedic twist on the setup but plenty of gore as well, making for the highlight of the ordeal.
Knob Goblins-Arriving at a random house in the middle of nowhere, a mental patient is tasked with returning to the house to complete his therapy to get over a traumatic childhood incident. Stuck alone in the house with a dangerous creature, his handlers realize too late he was right all along. This ended up being a highly enjoyable and entertaining effort. The design of the creature and the backstory about it's intentions are handled rather nicely, giving us enough to know about it that the interactions inside the house have a cheesy sense of fun alongside a few solid moments of suspense within the house unaware of where it is. The length means it ends abruptly and could've used a little more to flesh out what's going on, but otherwise this was quite fun.
The Bad Stor(ies): Ink-Partaking of snacks from a liquor market, a man ends up shortly afterward having the lot stolen by a stranger who takes everything back to his place. realizing the time is right to attach a procured piece of flesh, he begins the painful process to do so. There was a whole lot to this one. The initial premise here about a man getting his food stolen by a psycho isn't really that scary, which is pretty much the same feeling watching the disfigurement in the apartment as the nearly wordless segment doesn't reveal anything about a purpose or mission to it at all. The bloodletting and eventual surgery scene that follows is exceptionally realistic and brutal, but it's hard to know what's going on or what the entire point was all about without anything saying so.
Rated Unrated/R: Graphic Violence and Graphic Language.
The Good Stor(ies): The Stylist-Taking a new customer at the salon, a stylist begins to work on a regular as normal when finds her plan has worked as she falls unconscious in her chair during the procedure. When she begins to enact her plan of folicular thievery, unexpected incidents begin to hinder her plans. This one was an extremely effective entry. The fact that this one is all about building up more to the next extreme moment, as the initial banality of cutting her hair gives way to the victim being drugged that slowly comes to be revealed before the brutal scalping sequence takes place. With the victim coming to life only one of the potential hindrances and an epilogue detailing the nuttiness, this one does have a lot to like about even if this is a slightly low-key effort to start one of these efforts off being the lone flaw.
Foodies-Receiving an invitation to an underground restaurant, a restaurant owner and his chef arrive at the secret location and meet other foodies invited to partake in the evening. when he realizes the true intent in their meeting, he tries to find a way of getting away in one piece. This one ending up being quite a fun effort. The quick attempts at world-building here makes for a nice dive into this universe with it's commercials and rumors, while the community of the elitist chefs and foodies compared to the more general attitude of the other two who are just makes for a fine contrast between them. The entire twist is entirely predictable and seen coming a mile away, but the black comedy of the situation not only gives this one a comedic twist on the setup but plenty of gore as well, making for the highlight of the ordeal.
Knob Goblins-Arriving at a random house in the middle of nowhere, a mental patient is tasked with returning to the house to complete his therapy to get over a traumatic childhood incident. Stuck alone in the house with a dangerous creature, his handlers realize too late he was right all along. This ended up being a highly enjoyable and entertaining effort. The design of the creature and the backstory about it's intentions are handled rather nicely, giving us enough to know about it that the interactions inside the house have a cheesy sense of fun alongside a few solid moments of suspense within the house unaware of where it is. The length means it ends abruptly and could've used a little more to flesh out what's going on, but otherwise this was quite fun.
The Bad Stor(ies): Ink-Partaking of snacks from a liquor market, a man ends up shortly afterward having the lot stolen by a stranger who takes everything back to his place. realizing the time is right to attach a procured piece of flesh, he begins the painful process to do so. There was a whole lot to this one. The initial premise here about a man getting his food stolen by a psycho isn't really that scary, which is pretty much the same feeling watching the disfigurement in the apartment as the nearly wordless segment doesn't reveal anything about a purpose or mission to it at all. The bloodletting and eventual surgery scene that follows is exceptionally realistic and brutal, but it's hard to know what's going on or what the entire point was all about without anything saying so.
Rated Unrated/R: Graphic Violence and Graphic Language.
Shows why horror now stinks!!
Marynewcomb201324 December 2018
It's more about gore than being filled with actual horror!! Horror is about making you use your imagination on how the killer killed the victim!! Giving you a scare to make you jump when you least expect it!! Movies like this is about showing everything possible about the gore!! Look at psycho & what Alfred did. He showed you the knife, blood going down the drain & Janet's face but never showed the kill itself!! That's what horror is!! The exorcist is another example of how a horror movie should be!!
it's laughable
alliestarxo20 May 2019
So I'm 3 stories out of 4 in this movie. and all I can say is that this consists of laughable storylines with a glory ending. it's not horror not even close don't believe the hype LOL but it is silly to watch if you want a good laugh. this movie has no self-awareness nor does it take itself seriously.
STAY FAR AWAY
killmage5 November 2019
Mueller, Mueller
nogodnomasters30 November 2018
Warning: Spoilers
The film consists of four short "horror" films. The first two were rather short and pointless. The third "Foodies" was by far the longest, a script we saw coming miles away, as it has been done as a full-length film and better. The fourth film was unique, but not totally so. They all seemed to have some light comedy elements to them. There are better anthologies out there.
Guide: F-word. No sex or nudity.
Guide: F-word. No sex or nudity.
I can't say much
gregcrumbliss7 September 2019
DO NOT WATCH
chanceyost12 December 2020
Don't press play, just look away.
ensavondel22 October 2019
Seriously. Don't even bother trying to watch this movie.
Complete waste of time, horrid acting, none of the mini stories make sense, or don't explore any part of the characters back stories.
Infact, I went in thinking this was a regular movie, non anthology style, and the way the stories end is jarring, non-conclusive, and poor.
Whoever made this film should stick to low budget YouTube videos or study short films that do horror well enough. This series of mini flicks is all body horror and fake blood; simply there to gross you out. Nothing is terrifying, realistic, or yes, fleshed out.
Would give it a 0/10 if possible. Which leads me to my last complaint, whoever came up with the description, learn English and next time, slap yourself before putting a smiley face in your summary. Then rethink what you are planning to write to capture our attention.
Complete waste of time, horrid acting, none of the mini stories make sense, or don't explore any part of the characters back stories.
Infact, I went in thinking this was a regular movie, non anthology style, and the way the stories end is jarring, non-conclusive, and poor.
Whoever made this film should stick to low budget YouTube videos or study short films that do horror well enough. This series of mini flicks is all body horror and fake blood; simply there to gross you out. Nothing is terrifying, realistic, or yes, fleshed out.
Would give it a 0/10 if possible. Which leads me to my last complaint, whoever came up with the description, learn English and next time, slap yourself before putting a smiley face in your summary. Then rethink what you are planning to write to capture our attention.
Amateur Efforts at Best
jorgito20012 October 2019
Review For What It Is: Well Shot Gore Horror
timetopooptoday2 April 2019
I'm not rating this film comparing it in my head to all the other horror films I've ever seen. Instead, I'm rating this film the way films should be rated, based on what they actually are and the purpose for which they were intended. This isn't a psychological thriller horror which most would rate the 10 stars with top name actors. But aside from what it's not, here's what it is: It's a bloody disgusting gore horror movie. Good acting. Excellent directing. Great filming and cinematography as far as horror and gore go, and awesome special effects. This movie is a series of mini horror stories. Each story is atmospheric based on the story line. The acting is excellent in each one which was really surprising. You do miss the long hold-your-attention story lines that are typical of your run-of-the-mill slasher film but each story has a purpose and some meaning there. The emphasis is placed on the special effects and the idea of what's actually happening. If you're a GORE fan, you're going to enjoy this. I am personally not a big gore fan but I still saw the value in the product for this genre. "Watch If You Dare" is actually the perfect title. I wouldn't watch this alone or at night. Or while eating.
Do NOT watch!!! Unless you dare?
johnpickles2514 September 2022
Hey there stranger,
John Pickls here. (My John Handcock)
I came home from work after a long and gruelling shift at Wendys today and coming home to a nagging wife.. I had enough and decided to throw on this movie.
Being the curious cat that I am (I cannot read)
This movie came on my screen and I watched the whole thing!
Watch if you dare (I did watch it) is the movie that I watched. Burger
There is a lot of movies here... almost 5 but there is actually 4.
All of them scared me so much that I had to go to for a walk... I have a lot on my mind lately...
I cannot believe they got away with calling one of the shorts gnob gobbler! (Not sure what gnob is.. I haven't seen the prequel?)
Good luck,
JP.
John Pickls here. (My John Handcock)
I came home from work after a long and gruelling shift at Wendys today and coming home to a nagging wife.. I had enough and decided to throw on this movie.
Being the curious cat that I am (I cannot read)
This movie came on my screen and I watched the whole thing!
Watch if you dare (I did watch it) is the movie that I watched. Burger
There is a lot of movies here... almost 5 but there is actually 4.
All of them scared me so much that I had to go to for a walk... I have a lot on my mind lately...
I cannot believe they got away with calling one of the shorts gnob gobbler! (Not sure what gnob is.. I haven't seen the prequel?)
Good luck,
JP.
See also
Awards | FAQ | User Ratings | External Reviews | Metacritic Reviews
