Dating Amber (2020) User Reviews

Wow! Great LGBTQIA+ film for teens (and those a bit older too!)

[GoreWhoreAust · 8/10 · 26 September 2021]

Well shot and well acted, particularly by Petticrew and O 'Shea in the leads, this sweet and often funny Irish film tells a familiar story in a refreshing way. Though I don't recall the year ever being mentioned in the film, setting the story in the mid 90s has the advantage of avoiding the often obnoxious trap of present day set teen stories that fixate on smart phones and social media. Without that, Dating Amber is able to depict a friendship based on human contact, conversation and shared experiences.

An underdeveloped B story regarding Eddie's parents being on the cusp of divorce that has no real impact on the A story is a minor issue, overshadowed by the sheer charm of it all and the authenticity of the two leads.

Awkward "pretend" relationship

[chong_an · 7/10 · 14 October 2020]

In a semi-autobiographical film set in 1995 Ireland, 2 high school seniors date each other (and exhibit public displays of affection) to ward off suspicions of being gay. Amber is confident, and plans to use her entrepreneurial savings to go to London and join the punk scene. Eddie is resisting identifying as gay, and has internalized his army-commander father's desire for him to follow his footsteps. While only pretending, the two actually develop a form of affection for each other. However, trips to nearby Dublin, where they find a gay scene and Amber a girlfriend, cause trouble for the duo.

Beyond the action at school, there are the dynamics of both families. By seeing this film at a digital film festival, I was able to re-watch parts to figure out certain scenes, or catch scenes that went over my head on the 1st viewing. But there are inconsistencies of note: Even if Eddie can do only one pull-up, he rides his bike everywhere, so he can't be as unfit as he is made out to be. While Amber tells Eddie of his gay mannerisms, he is nowhere near obvious in doing so. Meanwhile, at different times, Amber is either straight-curious or dick-averse. Offsetting this are other touching snippets, and amusing revelations at the family dinner table by Eddie's younger brother, about Eddie's rumored sexual activities from school gossip.

There are echoes of other teen movies, like Risky Business, Moonlight, and American Graffiti. This is a reasonable combination story of both coming out and coming of age.

Love an Irish queer film!

[Jamesfelix-24834 · 8/10 · 20 June 2022]

Really loved this gentle film and a twist on a trope that is normally dominated by heterosexual narratives. Both the young actors are great with an excellent supporting cast. There's a beautiful use of a U2 song that I found surprising and definitely sprung on the tears. Would recommend.

Flashes Of Greatnesses

[Neon_Gold · 6/10 · 4 June 2020]

I did enjoy this movie for the most part but some things in it just didn't sit with me for some reason.

The script was a bit here there and everywhere. Some characters were just caricature mainly the students in the school but I'm not entirely sure if that was the fault of the acting or the script or both.

Before I talk about the male lead I do want to say he really impressed me because I thought he was really lifeless at time but then I realised it was a choice because in one scene where the characters relaxes and feels safe he really comes alive and it's a really nuanced choice and found it great.

The life of the male lead is very very unclear, I found the dynamics of the people he interacts with very peculiar. He has conversations with people like he is their friend but then they relentlessly bully him and I don't even think it's like "haha lads being lads joking" straight macho banter, it is bullying. Then he will once again be talking to them like they are best friend. I think this is really strange and bugged me throughout the whole film.

The female lead is wrote so much better and her wants and traits are much clearer. I think this hinders the male lead once again because it makes him tiresome compared to the female lead.

Some scenes are really impactful and done really great. You can almost feel what the characters are feeling and I think that is so good, however some of theses sense get muddy with strange choice and behaviour from characters. It takes you back a bit. I think this issue is this movie likes to make sure you understand everything.

So the lead males room is decorated with overtly masculine men in army uniforms because he wants to join the army. I thought that was great set dressing and kinda funny like yeah he might like to have things like that on his wall. But then the movie has to point it out like "HAHA isn't that funny that he is gay and has these posters on his wall audience". I wish it would let people come to it on their own. This isn't the only instance it happens in different scene too in different ways.

The characters are also kinda selfish too which makes it hard to connect with them and I totally get it, with some things in their situation they need to be selfish to protect them selfs but then some actions I am left wondering why they would do that.

The ending was nice and kinda sweet and I want to really like this movie. It seemed really cute and I guess I did like it I just had some issue. It is totally watchable so give it a watch.

Two coming of age stories in Ireland.

[TxMike · 20 March 2021]

It is about high school kids dealing with the difficulties of growing up, particularly sexuality and including being bullied at school. The novelty of this story is that a lesbian girl and a reluctant gay boy decide to hush their heckler friends by starting a relationship. They visit each others families, they show PDA at school, but deep down have an agreement that it is just for show and after graduation each will go their own way.

The story is for the most part handled very well. As has become the custom for scripts with high school characters there is a bit over-emphasis on sex and sex-related discussions. I doubt this is representative of the average Irish high school. Still much of it is done to inject humor into a story which otherwise has very serious implications.

My wife and I watched it at home on DVD from our public library, we were entertained. The Irish humor is quite different from American humor.

'A Matter of Life & Death'...

[Xstal · 6/10 · 10 June 2020]

... when you can't be who you need to be. Touching coming of age story as two teenagers come to terms with who they are in mid 90s Ireland.

A great coming (out)-of-age

[MiguelAReina · 7/10 · 7 February 2021]

As a kind of Irish "Love, Simon" (Greg Berlanti, 2018), this is a refreshing look at the coming out but one that proposes a much more interesting reflection on gender roles, on sexual acceptance and hetero-society . The sense of humor is very sarcastic and the dialogue reflects the inner world of the characters, better defined in Amber than in Eddie. The construction of splendid secondary characters magnifies the protagonists.

Finally a decent movie

[jak35-827-281480 · 9/10 · 12 November 2020]

If you are as tired as I am of depressing LGBT movies, where every time all you can see is eternal suffering, that's the movie you should definitely watch! I loved the plot, I loved the actors, I loved everything. It's not cheep, the picture is beautifully made, it's light and full of hope. A bit thank you to the authors, I've got enough on my plate in real life, so it's nice to distract myself with a movie like that.

Recent best

[ks-60500 · 7/10 · 20 June 2020]

Teen movie is not my first choice always, but it did really interesting about the content of this movie. The teen is gay totally understandable that his teacher, dad, army mate - all are handsome n too cute. Probably the best Ireland LG movie I watch so far.

Endearing and awkward

[MegaMaexn · 9/10 · 25 July 2020]

A great little movie about the very scary coming of age experience and process of finding oneself. It has everything from the awkward educational sex video at school, the inevitable crush on a teacher, as well as inappropriate hand jobs in a movie theatre. But at the heart of the story is the initially platonic relationship between two confused teenagers, that turns into a mutually supportive friendship, making sure that emotional uncertainties about sexual orientation are resolved rather than become an inhibition.

Clunky but touching

[yellowmarlin · 6/10 · 25 November 2020]

It's crudely done, but this movie has heart and tells an important story. Lacks subtlety throughout, but the two young stars are great.

"We're On A Smoke Break!"

[gab-67599 · 10/10 · 7 December 2022]

Absolutely loved this movie! Eddie and Amber were very relatable. As a bi-sexual woman, this movie really touched me. Now, IF for some dumb reason you are homophobic, this is NOT a movie for you. The acting between these two was very addictive. I could not wait to see what they would do next. Not only that, but it was FUNNY! Great Irish humor movie. I will admit I didn't expect much going into this movie but after seeing it I will surely be watching it again. Even though some parts were slow, like the beach scene, the dancing in the club scene, and the ending train ride. Just to name a few,there were a but more but I cannot recall them ALL. So if you just speed right through those parts you won't miss anything. Also loved Eddie's little brother, he was funny as hell and I wish he had a bigger role in this movie. Another review said they could not get why Eddie kept going back to friends that were not really his friends. If that person was really watching the movie they would know Eddie would have done anything to fit in, take abuse, lie, beating up innocent ppl. Anything to keep his secret of who he really was inside! You will not be disappointed if you watch this movie, highly recommend!

when gaylord met gaily....

[ops-52535 · 6/10 · 10 June 2020]

In the year of the lord 1995 in catholic ireland is the subject for this rainbow colored a little bit of lgbtq'ish irish flick. its a pfretty original story, with nice acting for the front actors, a great variation in the musical score, and i'm sure it reflects some way of how it was or is to be gay or lesbian in ireland

its a film about the popularistic genderication subject thats been in the wind the past 20 years, not much new, but still something to chew on. i myself considering myself heterofile and straight but old fashion minded have had to open up for this new wave of being, taking special care when asking a niese or nephew if they have a boy or girlfriend, using the phrase ''partner'' just to avoid eventual blasphemia against the new teenage thinking free spiritual genderismic tendencies. i dont mind them , just feel a little bit relieved that i didnt have to make such deep considerations that has to be made by young people today.

so have a look for yourself, its a good and wellmeant story, so the grumpy old man gives his recommend

Could have been so good!

[orlaomeara · 3/10 · 14 June 2020]

First off I will say great cast, I have seen many of the main actors in other pieces so I can only blame the direction and script for the downfall of what I saw. I will also add that I am southern Itish, gay and that I went to secondary school in the 90s, though actually in a city school.

The critic review says based in northern Ireland, but this was based in southern Ireland in the 90s - 1995 to be exact and that is important as it would have been a different experience in northern Ireland especially as the 'troubles' were still quite rife then, as is properly depicted in Derry Girls! Instead you find out this is in Newbridge a town in Kildare just outside Dublin, which makes sense of the Dublin references throughout. The light touch to the influence of Catholic church and how the teenagers were able to behave at school was totally unrelatable. If it was meant to be funny it just failed on both accounts as it didn't reflect the time accurately and the humour was then distracted and not even the odd word like 'shift' made it feel of the time.

I think this is my main issue with it. Coming out in 90s Ireland was excruciatingly hard and the oppression for both men and women from society, religion and family was for the majority too much, to the point where many haven't and others waited to far later in life to do so, myself included (I didn't come out until my 30s - actually very common for those of that era I have learned). For those that did they faced the fear of being ostracised by family and community, plus treats of being beaten up. Given that one of these households was an army home and then that the other had suffered the loss of suicide (which was still viewed as a sin at the time with massive stigma and shame around) neither story felt real for not even capturing this, I don't think the army father's homophobia would have been anything near that passive if he was as emotionally repressed as they tried to imply.

The sentiment overall is well intentioned and that they protected each other and created this cloak for each other is definitely believable. The time setting and the surrounding storylines, environment and characters though we're not and distracted. What was worse and I also felt it had the potential to invalidate and does somewhat belittle the many 100s of 1000s of stories of Irish gay women and men who have spoken of how difficult it was to come then and still is to come out especially in rural situations.

It feels like it's time to show some of the real, more challenging, stories and stop with all.parents come round and are accepting. Yes many were and are, and I was one of the lucky ones who's parents came round with a lot of time. However there are still many for whom there is no acceptance and the pain and loneliness, of that rejection is what needs depicting to show the impact on those affected to those that reject them. That is the story that needs telling in Ireland and other nations in my eyes and would be the real step forward. If you could tie that up in a good comedy script, to offset the heavy moments, that would be golden.

I love it

[Gordon-11 · 28 June 2020]

This lovely film captures just how closeted gay teenagers feel in a small town. It's bitter sweet but also beautiful. I love it.

Good film, but it's not a comedy

[ross-london · 6/10 · 6 July 2020]

I went into this expecting the wrong thing - a rom com. It's not a comedy.

It's a lovely film about two teens/near adults discovering their sexualities and trying to find the confidence to accept who they are. As well as try and break out from, seemingly, constrained family life.

It's a very good film and we'll acted.

Dating Amber

[henry8-3 · 6/10 · 4 July 2020]

Petticrew and O'Shea are gay school seniors who date each other to avoid endless gibes from other students. She accepts she's gay, he refuses to accept it - a friendship develops against a variety of other problems at home.

Touching, but not ever so funny film that quite effectively explores teen issues particularly moving to adulthood amidst family demands and sexual ambiguity, with Petticrew, very much like a young Julie Walters, impressive.

Convincing but not satisfying.

[sumeet-nik240 · 7/10 · 21 November 2021]

Not a very 'must watch' movie. But, the actors seemed like they have poured their hearts into the characters. Very convincing, especially the lead actor were phenomenal.

Perfect.

[simonb-667-548936 · 10/10 · 18 March 2021]

Currently on a plane, crying and laughing after watching this wonderful beautiful story. It so perfectly captures what it is to be a confused and frightened teenager just on the precipice of coming out, of being okay. I know this because I went through almost the exact same thing, albeit in the late-90s and 2000s in Boston rather than during the Troubles in Ireland. It brought me right back.

Beautifully told. Beautifully acted. Not at all cloying or preachy. A new favorite for sure.

Ps. If you liked Derry Girls you will like this! (And vice versa!)

AMAZING

[sophieob-62423 · 10/10 · 6 June 2020]

Friendship, first love, nostalgia, a great soundtrack, beautiful settings, hilarious to heartfelt to heartbreaking moments, lovable characters, brilliant actors, brilliant script..I loved this film from beginning to end!

Still lot of hateful people in the world...

[PaulosF0307 · 9/10 · 7 June 2020]

Those who think this movie is bad, must have some hateful feelings in their bones, because it shows really well how gay people had to live back in the 90's. Not 10 out of 10, because the end may have been a bit better, but the movie itself shoes the struggle of being gay in the 90's and inn a country like Ireland very well. Please make more movies like this.

A bitter sweet film about coming out in 1990s Ireland.

[vampire_hounddog · 5/10 · 31 July 2020]

In a small town in early 1990s Ireland, two gay teenage school kids are bullied at school and try to hide their sexuality by pretending to date each other as boyfriend/girlfriend.

Nicely acted and written teen drama about the struggles of not only coming out in the less accepting early 1990s, but also with the weight of Catholicism bearing down on them. The film goes beyond merely having a period soundtrack of Britpop to inform us of the period, but is well presented in its clothes, attitudes and behviours, a Gaelic Grange Hill if you like. There is also a good flavour of Ireland just prior to the Celtic Tiger boom, but it's real message, presented as both comedy and drama is one of coming out and the struggles for teenagers.

Not just about LGBT but what friendship is!

[kritikasinghap · 9/10 · 22 June 2021]

A wonderful movie and apt scenario how most conservative 90s people treated the LGBT community and the fear of coming out in public. It beautifully portrays what true friendship is! The plot is great and the acting is just superb. A must watch!

Such a good film

[blob-93964 · 10/10 · 17 August 2022]

This is such a sweet film and a very accurate depiction of school in 90's. Coming out was near impossible if you were that age. The acting is brilliant, it's funny, awkward & emotional. A really enjoyable watch.

I LOVED IT SO MUCH!

[seeyallonao3 · 10/10 · 18 September 2020]

This movie was so sweet and heartfelt, I honestly loved it so so much. It's a wonderful coming of age film with a genuine friendship between the main characters. The characters were so loveable, the story was true to life, heartfelt and heartbreaking with funny bits in between and with a killer soundtrack too! Very well written and had my heart clenching, I cried a few times not going to lie.

With so many amazing coming of age love stories about straight couples coming out on Netflix these days I sometimes feel sad that I don't get to see myself represented in those cute movies, especially as a wlw. As a queer young woman it's hard to find modern coming of age films that you can genuinely relate to and Dating Amber touched my heart.

Beautiful film, highly recommend.