- Chris Griffin: Bazinga, father. Assuming "father" is still the appropriate designation.
- [he stares at him with a weird smirk]
- Peter Griffin: What... what are you doing?
- Chris Griffin: Waiting for the laugh to die down.
- Peter Griffin: That's how we'll win the Emmy - with dark, confusing plot twists like on Homeland or Mad Men.
- Chris Griffin: Ooh, or Breaking Bad. Or Mr. Robot Chicken.
- Peter Griffin: No, Chris, it's Mr. Robot.
- Chris Griffin: Chicken.
- Peter Griffin: Mr. Robot.
- Chris Griffin: Chicken!
- Peter Griffin: No, no, Chris, you see, Mr. Robot is a critically-acclaimed show. Robot Chicken is something kids used to watch in 2006. It's basically four minutes of nonsense on at 1:00 in the morning breaking up personal injury ads.
- Chris Griffin: Chicken.
- Text on screen: I don't want to go to her soccer game either.
- Text on screen: Whoops. That was a text meant for my wife.
- Text on screen: 12 hours later?
- Cleveland Brown: Remember, kill *anything* that moves.
- Peter Griffin: Even a kid?
- Cleveland Brown: ESPECIALLY a kid. You gotta kill a kid at least once a season to make people go "Oh, I can't believe they killed a kid!"
- Dr. Elmer Hartman: You have cancer.
- Peter Griffin: How long do I have to live?
- Dr. Elmer Hartman: One week. While I give the rest of your diagnosis, I'm going to gradually talk quieter, as if I'm growing distant, to show how overwhelmed you are by this news...