Martin P. Robinson: Proud Dwarf, Luke Warm, Announcer #2

Quotes 

• "Crying Game Show" announcer : Welcome to America's most emotional game show: "The Crying Game Show"! And now, Here is the host of The Crying Game Show. The man with the teeth: Sonny Friendly.

  Sonny Friendly : THANK YOU! THANK YOU! I'm Sonny Friendly, And are we having a nice day, or what?

  Audience : WHAT?

  Sonny Friendly : And NOW, Let's meet our contestants on The Crying Game Show. First up. All the way from Wisconsin, We have Luke Warm.

  Luke Warm : Thank You, Thank You. And how do you do, Mr. Sonny Friendly?

  Sonny Friendly : I am doing very well. And now, All the way from Kansas, We have Ida Normer!

  Ida Normer : Please, Calle me Mrs. Normer!

  Sonny Friendly : Okay, I can do that! And now, All the way from Paris France, We have Pierre Blue.

  Pierre Blue : Bonjour, America. Bonjour.

  Sonny Friendly : Whatever you say. Okay, Here is how we play "The Crying Game Show". I will be giving you a very sad story. And who ever cries the hardest. According the audience, Will win today's grand prize.

• Sonny Friendly : Voting is over. Let's show today's best cryer today's grand prize!

  "Crying Game Show" announcer : Today's best cryer will win The offficial Sonny Friendly and it goes to, Pierre Blue!

  Pierre Blue : WOW! I won...

  Sonny Friendly : WAIT! MY TEDDY BEAR? THAT'S TODAY'S GRAND PRIZE? BUT,

  [Voice Breaks down] 

  Sonny Friendly : BUT I LOVE MY TEDDY BEAR, YOU CAN'T DO THAT!

  [Sobs harder than the contestants] 

  "Crying Game Show" announcer : Sonny Friendly? You are the cryer in the Crying Game Show! YOU WON!

  [Fanfare plays and the audience applause] 

  Sonny Friendly : WHAT? I WON? You mean I can keep my teddy bear? WOW! THIS IS THE HAPPIEST DAY OF MY LIFE! Now let's give some contestants some consolation prize, Shall we?

  "Crying Game Show" announcer : NO!

  Sonny Friendly : What do you mean?

  "Crying Game Show" announcer : There is no consolation prize!

  Luke Warm : WHAT? NO CONSOLATION PRIZE?

  [Voice Breaks down] 

  Luke Warm : This is awful!

  Ida Normer : [Whines]  THAT'S NOT FAIR!

  Pierre Blue : [Voice Breaks down]  That makes me so sad!

  [All three contestants sobbing in failure] 

  Sonny Friendly : [while holding his teddy bear]  Well, I guess we can't all be winners. Huh?

  [laughs] 

  Sonny Friendly : Well, Thank you very much, Audience. And we will see you next time on "The Crying Game Show!"

  [to his teddy bear] 

  Sonny Friendly : Oh, Teddy. It's so good to have you back!

  [Kisses his teddy bear] 

  Sonny Friendly : [to the audience]  Are we having fun for what? Yes! This is terrific. Thank you very much, audience.