Judd Hirsch credited as playing...
Dr. Alfred Hofstadter
- Dr. Alfred Hofstadter: I'm an agnostic myself, but I have prayed many times to God. To turn my wife into a pillar of salt.
- Mary Cooper: Well, he came close. Turned her into a giant block o' ice.
- Dr. Alfred Hofstadter: Hello, my hateful shrew.
- Dr. Beverly Hofstadter: Hello to you, you wrinkled old bastard.
- Dr. Alfred Hofstadter: Hello, my hateful shrew.
- Dr. Beverly Hofstadter: Hello to YOU, you wrinkled old bastard.