- Victoria: The Tsar has sent us both dressing cases. Also a zebra from the Sultan of Muscat. And a cheese almost as big as me from the people of Somerset.
- Prince Albert: We will not starve, then.
- [Prince Ernest has taken Prince Albert to a German brothel for his stag night. Albert has reluctantly chosen a prostitute, Gretchen, and they have gone to her room. As she sits on his knee, they speak in German, which is translated into English subtitles]
- Prince Albert: [as Gretchen starts to kiss Albert] No.
- Gretchen: I know I am not the youngest girl but I am very proficient.
- Prince Albert: I don't want to engage with you, Gretchen, but as I am here, I would like you to instruct me in the matters in which you are proficient.
- Gretchen: Instruct you?
- Prince Albert: Yes. Do you have a pen and paper, so that I may take notes?
- Gretchen: [bewildered] Notes?
- Prince Albert: For the finer points.
- [Gretchen turns away so Albert cannot see that she is sniggering at his pomposity]
- Prince Albert: [realizing that Ernest has taken him to a brothel] Ernest, this is a house of ill repute!
- Prince Ernest: No, this is a university of love.