Rick and Morty (TV Series)

The Ricks Must Be Crazy (2015)

Justin Roiland: Rick, Morty

Photos 

Quotes 

• Morty : What's wrong Rick? Is it the quantum carburetor or something?

  Rick : Quantum carburetor? Jesus Morty, you can't just add a sci-fi word to a car word and hope it means something. Looks like something's wrong with the micro-verse battery.

• Rick : We did it Morty! Now, lets get out of here and destroy this whole universe!

  Business Alien : [taxi driver is confused]  Excuse Me?

• Morty : You guys, are the fucking worst! Your gods are a lie! Fuck you, fuck nature and fuck trees!

• Rick : Wait for the ramp, Morty. They love the slow ramp. It really gets their dicks hard

• Rick : Morty, there's nothing dishonest about what we're doing. Now slap on this antenna, these people need to think we're aliens

• Rick : They named a holiday after me. Ricksgiving. They teach kids about me in school!

  Zeep : I dropped out of school. It's not a place for smart people.

  Morty : Oh, snap!

• Rick : Nothing you do matters! Your existence is a lie!

• Rick : Morty, you gotta flip 'em off. I told them it means 'peace among worlds.' How hilarious is that!

• Rick : I put a spatially tessellated void inside a modified temporal field until a planet developed intelligent life. I then introduced that life to the wonders of electricity, which they now generate on a global scale. And, you know, some of it goes to power my engine and charge my phone and stuff.

  Morty : You have a whole planet sitting around making your power for you? That's slavery.

  Rick : It's society. They work for each other, Morty. They pay each other. They buy houses. They get married and make children that replace them when they get too old to make power.

  Morty : That just sounds like slavery with extra steps.

  Rick : Ooh-la-la, someone's gonna get laid in college.

• Morty : Oh man. Where are we Rick?

  Rick : Morty, remember eight seconds ago when

  [Burps] 

  Rick : when you said, "Go inside what?" And I said, "The battery"? And then we showed up here, and I wasn't like, "Whoa, this is unexpected. This is not what I was expecting, Morty. What a perplexing mystery this is."

  Morty : All right, all right. We're inside the battery. I get it. You don't have to bust my balls.

• Morty : All right, that's it! I'm out. I-I'm gonna go into the wilderness, and I'm gonna make a new life for myself among the tree people. It can't be worse than this.

  Rick : Sure. Okay, Morty. Just be back before sundown or the tree people will eat you.

  Morty : That's a myth! W-w-why are you trying to start a myth?

  Rick : It's a prehistoric planet, Morty. Someone has to bring a little culture. And it certainly can't be someone

  [to Zeep] 

  Rick : whose entire culture powers my brake lights!

• Kyle : It's not much now, but once I learn to accelerate the temporal field I'll be able to interact with any sentient life that evolves and then introduce them to the wonders of electricity via a pulley-based device I call a bloobleyank. But what they won't know is...

  Zeep : You'll be taking most of their energy, yeah, yeah I get it.

  Rick : It's showtime.

  Zeep : You do realise this will make the flooblecrank obsolete? This is wrong, Kyle! What you're doing is wrong! You're basically...

  [Rick mimes along] 

  Zeep : This is slavery, you're talking about creating a planet of slaves.

  Rick : Told you, Zeep.

  Kyle : Oh, they won't be slaves, they'll work for each other, and pay each other money...

  Zeep : That just sounds like... slavery... with extra steps.

  [Rounds on Rick] 

  Rick : What?

  Zeep : Wait a minute, did you create my universe? Is my universe a miniverse?

  Rick : Microverse!

  Kyle : I prefer teenyverse.

  Zeep : [Flicks off Rick's antennae]  You bastard!

  [Rick takes Zeep's mask and they fight] 

  Zeep : Much obliged!

  Kyle : What the hell is happening?

  Morty : Ah, this is healthy, trust me.

  Rick : You're my battery motherfucker, that's all you are! I made you! Your microverse sucks and your miniverse is the size of a fucking lobster tank! It's wack!

  Kyle : Are they not really aliens?

  Morty : Nah, they're just a couple of crazy, wacky scientists. You know?

  Kyle : So he made a universe, and that guy is from that universe, and that guy made a universe, and that's the universe where I was born? Where my father died. Where I couldn't make time for his funeral because I was working on my universe?

  Morty : Ha ha ha, yeah! Science huh? Ain't it a thing? You know one time Rick shot his laser pistol right through my hand? I mean, you know, like old lady science! You know, she's a real, you gotta hang on tight, you know, because she bucks pretty hard! Oh my God, no!

  [Kyle drives his craft into a cliff and it explodes]