Tremors 5: Bloodlines (2015 Video)

Michael Gross: Burt Gummer

Photos 

Quotes 

• Erich Van Wyck : Is that it?

  [after spotting an Ass-Blaster for the first time] 

  Burt Gummer : Sure as hell ain't Mickey Mouse.

• Burt Gummer : That's right. Fly right into my crosshairs, you fire-farting son of a bitch.

• Burt Gummer : Evolution run amok.

• Burt Gummer : For those of you newcomers, who don't have a clue about Graboids, let me bring you up to speed. The Graboid is a vicious subterranean predator, about 30 feet in length with a semi-rigid internal structure. It senses its prey seismically, and employ 3 powerful, snake-like oral tentacles to ensnare its prey, and pull it into the Graboid's gullet. It is not a pleasant venue. Trust me, I've been there. If that weren't enough, Graboids give birth to 3 ugly spawn we call Shriekers. Short, squat, and blind bipedal bad boys that sense and hunt their prey using infrared sensors. These, in turn, give rise to the Ass Blaster, a winged, predayory carnivore which uses a mixture of volatile chemicals in its, hmm, nether regions, to blast into the air and swoop down upon its victims. Ass Blasters carry eggs that hatch and become new Graboids, beginning this hellish cycle anew.

• Burt Gummer : Your problem is bigger than I thought, Mr. Van Wyk.

  Erich Van Wyck : How so?

  Burt Gummer : This Graboid is much larger than the North American variety.

  Johan Dreyer : It's Africa. Everything's bigger.

  Burt Gummer : Everything except my munitions. Knowing your enemy's strength is Intel 101. What other surprises do you have in store for me?

  Erich Van Wyck : I'm learning as I go, Mr. Gummer.

• Burt Gummer : Who are you?

  Erich Van Wyck : Let's start with who I'm not.

• Burt Gummer : My name is Burt Gummer. And I've been called many things: Gun enthusiast, monster-hunter, doomsday-prepper. I reject all these labels. What I am, is a survivalist. I've scoured the dirt and dust of Nevada and Mexico, putting my life on the line to hunt super-size subterranean man-eating predators called Graboids. Using a combination of local knowledge, intuition and firepower, I've managed to control this deadly species and keep them confined to the Northern Hemisphere. Join me, as I enter into and beneath the sands of hell.

• Burt Gummer : You from the government?

  Travis B. Welker : Nope. Florida. Grew up on the Gulf Coast. Panama Cirt, Trampa, Pensacola.

  Burt Gummer : Pensacola?

  Travis B. Welker : Yeah.

  Burt Gummer : They got a great gun show.

  Travis B. Welker : Yeah, right off the Interstate.

  Burt Gummer : I was there in '74.

  Travis B. Welker : You got that look.

  Burt Gummer : What look?

  Travis B. Welker : The I did some dirty things in Florida look. Hey, I get it. It was the '70s, free love, you were young.

• Burt Gummer : This is a bag of dicks. We're outta ammo and we have to blow that cave.

  Travis B. Welker : Come on, Gums. Don't lose faith. We are definitely F'ed up beyond all recognition. But we are not out of ammo.

  Burt Gummer : All I got is this damn pop gun, that's it.

  Travis B. Welker : The bag is full, and it's ready to blow. Think outside the box.

  Burt Gummer : Oh my God, you're right.

  Travis B. Welker : Yeah.

  Burt Gummer : That'll scramble a few eggs.

  Travis B. Welker : Oh, no. That'll make a big frickin' omelet, is what that'll make.