Seth Rogen: Sandy

The Disaster Artist

Sandy

[from trailer]
Sandy Schklair: Action!
[Wiseau enters the scene]
Tommy Wiseau: I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit! I did not hit her. I did not.
[throws water bottle on the ground]
Tommy Wiseau: Oh, hi Mark.
[pause, then the crew applauds before Greg hugs Wiseau]

[from trailer]
Greg Sestero, Sandy Schklair: I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit. I did not hit her. I did not. Oh, hi Mark.

[from trailer]
Sandy Schklair: Why is he having sex with her bellybutton? He knows where her vagina is, right?

[from trailer]
Sandy Schklair: Ready, and, Action!
[Wiseau opens the rooftop door and steps into the scene. He pauses for several seconds]
Tommy Wiseau: What line? What is the line?
Sandy Schklair: I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit. I did not hit her. I did not. Oh, hi Mark.
Tommy Wiseau: Okay.
[Wiseau returns to the rooftop exit]

Sandy Schklair: [Watching the flower shop scene] Who doesn't recognize that guy?

[Tommy prepares to film his sex scene, and he is walking in the set completely naked]
Tommy Wiseau: Okay, okay, we go.
Greg Sestero: Tommy, Tommy, this is not necessary.
Tommy Wiseau: No. It very necessary. I need to show my ass to sell this movie, okay?
Greg Sestero: That's not true.
Sandy Schklair: At least we have a closed set.
Tommy Wiseau: Not closed set. Open set. Life is not closed set! I want everyone to see!
[points at Greg]
Tommy Wiseau: You, especially.
Greg Sestero: W-what? Why? What?
Tommy Wiseau: Brad Pitt do this in the Legend of the Fall.

Sandy Schklair: [Wiseau is sitting back up after acting the suicide moment]
[Whispering]
Sandy Schklair: Why is he getting back up?
[Wiseau picks up the red dres]
Sandy Schklair: Cut!
Tommy Wiseau: No, don't cut! Don't cut! Why you cut, Sandy? This is great! This real acting!
Sandy Schklair: If you're gonna writhe around with the dress, maybe do it before you shoot yourself in the head and blow your brains out.
Tommy Wiseau: I disagree!

Sandy Schklair: Take 67, Action!
Tommy Wiseau: [Wiseau enters the scene while looking directly into the camera] I did not hit her. It's not true. It's bullshit. I did not hit her. I did not. Oh, hi Mark.
Sandy Schklair: [Frustrated] What the f- where are you looking? It doesn't work when you're looking into the camera!
Tommy Wiseau: What?

Sandy Schklair: Action!
[Wiseau doesn't walk into the scene]
Sandy Schklair: Action!
[Wiseau still doesn't enter]
Sandy Schklair: Action! Action! Action!
Tommy Wiseau: You have to say it loud, I can't hear! Say "action" so I can hear!