Plot

Juggling angry Russians, the British Mi5, and an international terrorist, debonair art dealer and part-time rogue Charlie Mortdecai races to recover a stolen painting rumored to contain a code that leads to lost gold.

Juggling some angry Russians, the British Mi5, his impossibly leggy wife and an international terrorist, debonair art dealer and part-time rogue Charlie Mortdecai must traverse the globe armed only with his good looks and special charm in a race to recover a stolen painting rumored to contain the code to a lost bank account filled with Nazi gold.—Lionsgate UK

Lord Charlie Mortdecai, an unscrupulous art dealer and swindler, is accosted in Hong Kong by one of his victims, a gangster named Fang. Jock, Mortdecai's faithful manservant, extricates his master before they can be killed by Fang's gunmen. They return to London, where Mortdecai and his wife, Johanna, consider ways to pay off their crushing debt to the UK taxman. A painting by Francisco Goya becomes the target of an elaborate theft which results in the murders of an art restorer and one of the thieves. Inspector Alistair Martland is put on the case. Martland, who has been in love with Johanna since college, asks Mortdecai to assist him. Martland believes the prime suspect to be Emil Strago. Mortdecai agrees to help in exchange for 10% of the insurance money..

Lord Charlie Mortdecai, a dubiously-reputed but expert art wheeler and dealer counting on his devoted manservant Jock to save his bacon with swindled or criminal clients, is near bankruptcy due to US taxes, so prepares his aristocratic wife Johanna to selling off some heirlooms from their grand residence. That gets her even less in the mood to put up with his freshly grown 'ancestral' mustache, all to more to flirt with rival admirer Alistair Martland, an MI5 agent counting on Charlie as art expert, hence looking away from his shady deals. This time he must verify the rare Goya painting stolen from the murdered restorer Georgina and follow the fencing trail, promised a 10% insurance fee. It leads him to his reputable competitor Sir Graham, Russian oligarch Romanov's goons abducting Mortdecai perilously to Moscow, the best smuggler to the US, and obscenely rich, dirty client Krampf's Californian playpen, and Johanna to a dying duke's grand estate.—KGF Vissers

Lord Charlie Mortdecai (Johnny Depp), an unscrupulous art dealer and swindler, is accosted in Hong Kong by one of his victims, a gangster named Fang (Junix Inocian). Jock (Paul Bettany), Mortdecai's faithful manservant, extricates his master before they can be killed by Fang's gunmen. They return to London, where Mortdecai and his wife, Johanna (Gwyneth Paltrow), consider ways to pay off their crushing debt to the UK taxman. A painting by Francisco Goya becomes the target of an elaborate theft which results in the murders of an art restorer and one of the thieves. Inspector Alistair Martland (Ewan McGregor) is put on the case.

Martland, who has been in love with Johanna since college, asks Mortdecai to assist him (given Mortdecai's considerable contacts in the art world). Martland believes the prime suspect to be Emil Strago (Jonny Pasvolsky), a known terrorist and hence his involvement has interested the security agencies. Mortdecai agrees to help in exchange for 10% of the insurance money. Mortdecai meets Dr Graham, who is a known critic in the art world and asks him about the missing Goya associated with the death of a lowly restorer. Dr Graham is immediately interested and asks Mortdecai, who his client is. Mortdecai refuses to reveal and so Dr Graham calls his client, Romanov.

Mortdecai interviews people affiliated with the art world, including Spinoza (Paul Whitehouse), an art smuggler. While they argue, Strago arrives and shoots at them, killing Spinoza; Mortdecai and Jock escape unharmed. Post the attack, Mortdecai reviews the crime scene photos and sees the pictures of the missing Goya painting & is convinced that the restoration should have been a simple job and therefore the restorer was cleaning it and found something underneath the painting.

He concludes that this is the same Goya which was used by a Nazi general to write down his Swiss bank account numbers (on the back of), which contains untold riches. Johanna meets with a man known as The Duke (Michael Byrne), who knows the thief and says that the painting conceals the location of a hoard of Nazi gold. Mortdecai is kidnapped by thugs working for a Russian named Romanov (Ulrich Thomsen). Romanov and Strago think that Mortdecai has the painting (since they heard from Mortdecai's client Krampf (the man who is buying Mortdecai's rolls) that Mortdecai is going to deliver the painting to him). Romanov threatens torture unless Mortdecai surrenders it, but Mortdecai escapes through a window and Jock spirits him away.

Martland, wanting to be alone with Johanna, sends Mortdecai to America to meet with Milton Krampf (Jeff Goldblum), a potential buyer for the Goya. Mortdecai plans to sell his beloved Rolls-Royce to the American and uses the opportunity to see if Krampf is involved with the theft. Arriving in Los Angeles, he discovers that the Goya has been hidden in the Rolls. Spinoza, in the employ of Krampf, stashed it there after stealing it from Strago, the original thief; Krampf planned to dupe Mortdecai into smuggling the Goya into the United States in his own car.

He invites Mortdecai to a party that night, where Krampf intends to display the ill-gotten painting. Jock suggests that he and Mortdecai steal the painting for themselves during the party. Krampf's daughter, Georgina (Olivia Munn), is secretly Strago's partner. She attempts to seduce Mortdecai while Strago steals the painting. Johanna arrives with Martland and catches her husband in a compromising position. Mortdecai flees the scene to help Jock steal the painting, but they find Krampf has been murdered by Strago and the painting is gone. Martland and Johanna capture Strago, but Georgina gets the drop on them, liberating her lover and the painting.

Pursued by Mortdecai, Jock, Martland and Johanna, they hide in a motel where Strago intentionally sets fire to the Goya and the fire causes the explosion of the building. Johanna reveals that the painting was a fake (the restorer didn't restore the Goya, she painted a fake and sold it to Krampf, who got Spinoza to ship it to him. But Georgie heard her father's conversation, called Strago and got him to steal the paining. Stavo stole it but was clubbed by Spinoza's guy who took it from Strago); The Duke has the real one hidden in his bathroom.

They retrieve the Goya but have run out of time to pay their taxes to the British Government. So Mortdecai devises a plan to disguise the Goya as his painting (that is up for auction to pay off part of the debts & avoid bankruptcy). He sends the word out to Graham, Romanov & Strago that the real Goya is in play.

The Mortdecais retrieve the painting and put it up for auction. The sale attracts Fang, still seeking revenge, and Romanov, who wants the painting regardless of cost. While Mortdecai and Jock waylay both men's thugs, Strago attempts to kidnap Johanna. Mortdecai bids up the Goya, but Romanov wins it at $30 MM; Martland apprehends Strago during the commotion. The Mortdecais find that the proceeds of the sale pay off their debt courtesy of Martland and that after the sale they are still broke however, the painting is revealed to be another fake. Romanov plots his revenge whilst his thugs begin to torture Sir Graham.