Hot in Cleveland (TV Series)

No Glove, No Love (2013)

Wendie Malick: Victoria Chase

Quotes 

• Victoria Chase : These English instructions are worse than the French ones. What or who is Allen Wrench? This stupid car has more pieces than the puppet theater. And it needs two D batteries; where are we going to get those?

  [Victoria and Elka both look over at Joy] 

  Joy Scroggs : Fine. I'll take them out of my... personal back massager.

• Victoria Chase : I hate hardware stores.

  Joy Scroggs : Me too. It's all just stuff you need; nothing you ever want.

• [first lines] 

  Victoria Chase : Well, thank God Wilbur's present arrived from France in time for his birthday. What did you always dream of having when you were a little girl growing up in Poland?

  Elka Ostrovsky : Food.

  Victoria Chase : But a close second must have been... an eighteenth century beaux arts marionette theater.

  Joy Scroggs : Oh no, the instructions are in French.

  Elka Ostrovsky : What's French for 'puppets are creepy'?

  [Victoria has picked up a puppet] 

  Elka Ostrovsky : It looks just like you.

  Joy Scroggs : There is a resemblance.

  Victoria Chase : What? This freakish creature looks nothing like me.

  Melanie Moretti : [Melanie enters]  Hey, where'd you get the Victoria puppet?