Jet Stream (TV Movie 2013) Poster

(2013 TV Movie)

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3/10
Only really has the scenery and to a lesser extent the music going for it
TheLittleSongbird20 August 2013
There are worse SyFy original movies than Jet Stream, though that is very little consolation as from this viewer's perspective it wasn't a good movie at all. It's not entirely without redeeming qualities, the best aspect is the scenery which is really quite lovely and eye-catching. And actually the music also has its moments, not a great score with not much that is unique about it but less generic and sluggish-in-tempo than other SyFy movies of its type and any other genre. They're all that Jet Stream has going for it. Regardless of whether it shows an inaccurate representation of the military, from memory the military have been represented far worse than here(from a movie seen in the past three months or so Sea Viper comes to mind), or not, that was among the least of Jet Stream's problems if so. Jet Stream is badly hindered by budget, the movie just looks drab with editing that suggests either somebody with little experience or one with little interest for the movie and special effects that are at best slapdash and rushed through. The script is riddled with tired clichés, the cheese factor and parts that will leave people confused as to whether it makes sense or not. Another one of those movies that could have done with a proper read-through. The characters are cardboard stereotypes with personalities that are not interesting or engaging in the slightest, while there is a sense that the actors were not connecting with their characters or material at all.

Few of them seemed to be even aware of the situation their characters were in and there is a lot of phoning-in and embarrassed-looking body language going on. But the aspect that came off worst of all was the story. Some may find spotting the many scientific errors fun to spot, others will be too infuriated to be entertained. Either way, with errors this many and so confused in nature it gets increasingly difficult to take things seriously. There are some decent enough ideas on display, the problem is- and sorry to anybody who considers this a tired criticism- Jet Stream either under-develops these ideas or doesn't do anything with them. Not just that but it tries to incorporate several plot elements and neither come off successfully. The disaster elements lack excitement and is too ridiculous to properly swallow with the cheapest of the production values. The conspiracy thriller elements feature Jet Stream's most stock characters and most unfocused dialogue and just don't thrill or engage, instead any scenes involving this are dull. The satire lacks bite, sharpness or acerbic wit and while the media can exaggerate or twist things at times the satire here can border on heavy-handed and preachy and almost too much of an attack. And the romantic elements descends into mawkishness and overwrought melodrama, and has the movie's most toe-curlingly clichéd dialogue. In conclusion, there is worse out there than Jet Stream but there are no thrills or sense of fun, and the cheap production values, bad dialogue and acting and a story that does very little with any potential it had sees to that. The scenery and to a lesser extent the music are the best things about it, everything else is a failure, by all means if you like it go ahead but if anyone does dislike it it is very easy to see why. 3/10 Bethany Cox
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3/10
A Film That Will Blow Away No One
Theo Robertson28 June 2013
A fundamental problem with making a film that will appeal to everyone is the danger that it will appeal to absolutely no one . This low budget production entitled JET STREAM and filmed in Bulgaria is a case in point . It tries to mesh in several genres such as disaster epic , conspiracy thriller , satire on the media and a bit of romance . It does nothing well and quickly becomes tiresome

JET STREAM sets out its stall how bad it is going to be right from the opening scene where an American airforce Major is in contact with an US military plane conducting an experiment . What will strike you about this airforce Major isthree things

1 ) He is somewhat overweight

2 ) He doesn't have a US military regulation hairstyle

3 ) He obviously hasn't shaved for several days

When a director gets little things like this wrong in the opening scene what hope for the rest of the film ? No hope at all as the film lurches from one underdeveloped theme and scene to another . You might have some fun pointing out the ridiculous scientific mistakes in this film but that's probably the only fun you'll get from JET STREAM
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2/10
Godawful
Leofwine_draca5 June 2015
Even by the extremely low standards of SyFy Channel disaster movies, JET STREAM is a particularly poor movie, excruciating in fact. It's the usual CGI-fuelled disaster nonsense, yes, but the problem here is that the lead is this ultra-annoying TV weatherman who ends up advising scientists and military personnel who can't work stuff out for themselves.

The weatherman is introduced in the most excruciating 'comedy' scene ever via a series of bloopers at his workplace. I'm not sure what's worse, the cringe-worthy acting or the scriptwriter's ill-advised attempts at 'humour'. Needless to say that none of this is funny, even remotely funny, while the disaster shenanigans are low rent and annoying. The SyFy Channel will have to do very badly indeed to make a worse film than this one.
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1/10
Watchable when drunk
sharok8 June 2015
Where to start ?

Let's just say that the actors in this movie are well aware that their performance here is not going to land them even a janitor position in the same frame as an A-list actor. The actors are either bland, or prone to confuse hysteria with passion. Then again, the script gives nothing to be passionate about, so maybe hysteria was the best bet.

Memorable quote : "She's going to call the telephone company and put a trace on this call. You don't want that to happen !" says the hero to his jailer. What ? His girlfriend can call the telephone company and have the call traced ? Sorry, I must have missed the part where it was mentioned that she was FBI, Secret Service or had even the most tenuous connection to some person of authority who could actually have that put in place for her. Whatever the love interest's job is, it has nothing near the clout needed to pull that off.

Then we have the entire premise of the film : that a weatherman has modeled climate on his laptop to be able to predict extreme weather conditions. No offense to weathermen, I happen to know that their job actually requires level of mathematics way beyond my own, but this guy is no weatherman, he's just the TV announcer. The day we have a genius TV announcer who happens to hold a PhD in thermodynamics and is content with smiling on camera while pointing to fluffy white clouds on a blue screen, call me and I will revise my opinion of this film.

If you're stone drunk or high as a kite, this might be viewed as passable entertainment. Otherwise, stay clear.
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2/10
Incompetence at 500MPH
VeraWade1 June 2014
It's movies like Jet Stream that make you wonder how Syfy manages to spend hundreds upon hundreds of thousands of dollars on each of their movies, and still get phenomenally bad results.

Jet Stream suffers from very bad writing, leading to cringe-worthy dialog in a lot of the film. For some reason there's quite a lot of painfully bad jokes too, and it seems they couldn't have been times worse. Add on to that the wooden acting by an extensive part of the cast.

The CGI is just not convincing at all, everything looks very poorly and amateurishly done. The sequences that are meant to thrill the audience just look ridiculous, laughably bad at times. I also counted a couple of completely unnecessary close-ups.

This is one of the many movies in which Syfy tried to disguise Eastern Europe like the USA, and here they did pretty much the worst job of all their movies I've seen so far. Not to mention that there are countless shots in this, which Syfy has recycled and used for multiple movies. Really, the only positive thing there is to say is that this movie may make you laugh at how bad it is.
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2/10
Sponsership?
theenglishmaster25 September 2015
The other reviewers have got so much of the more abysmal moments in this really momentous movie, (sticks fingers down throat), that I didn't think there was much more I could add, but surprisingly before I got totally bored with it and flipped to ST the original series, there was a classic scene, where a soldier was electrocuted and the "hero" TV weatherman dived in to check his pulse at the speed of light, before promptly going into CPR, which he patently knew nothing about as he replied, "I got this man, I saw it on Baywatch", well that was the second thing that had me rofl today and I was the first thing.

It probably didn't help the poor guy, flashing his brilliant white teeth and clean cut jaw, lying, to explain where he really was to the blond bimbo he was dating, sorry feminists, but she really was and probably still is and since she is Barbie the airhead he most definitely is Ken.

I finally gave up when the Major re-appeared again, out of sync, the continuity was as abysmal as his haircut and thought enough is enough, I can stand no more, my brain will become as jellified as the crew.

45 minutes of STOS I can cope with, but the studios are going to have to up their game, to impress me and maintain my attention these days.

I will attend the formal burial ceremony, if I can join the celebrations at the wake afterwards. :) R.I.P.
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2/10
Weatherman Gone Wild.
qyzenreviews17 May 2021
There are obviously terrible movies than this, but this is a complete loss of the precious and valuable time, It's not about big cast or anything, but rather more critically about how you make a decent film, it doesn't make any difference if it's a B Movie, You can watch it only when you're drunk that might give you a jet lag with a jet stream.
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1/10
God Awful and the acting is as bad!
tcwaterford17 May 2022
WHY? WHY?

Is this some kind of disguised benevolent fund for bad actors and incompetent script writers??.

WHY else would any sane person make such an Awful attempt?.

NO SPOILERS, just a Dreadful Script, dreadful acting and the most inept attempt of direction and production!.

WHY BOTHER?, I gave it 1 out of 10, only because I couldn't give it less!.
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Yes, films can use real military uniforms, and be properly worn
rogerif29 July 2013
I've not seen this film and I might not. Yet, this is no less a review.

I'm responding to a patient falsehood, or urban myth, concerning Hollywood's some time lack of actual presentation of the military in film. Not too surprisingly there isn't any U.S. law preventing a movie production involved in the portrayal of armed forces personnel to use correct military uniforms, along with proper grooming. In fact, presenting any military force in its proper array, in film, is advisable. It was plainly determined by the US Supreme Court in the case SCHACHT v. UNITED STATES, 398 U.S. 58 (1970).

So if the production company and director fail to present proper military uniforms, with correct placement of unit patches, rank tabs, and ribbons and other such accessories, and grooming is deplorable, then, in my opinion, the script/acting isn't much better anyway. Yes, this is a blind and very arbitrary judgment of a film I've not seen. But, I'm also operating from experience, as both a military veteran and a avid movie goer.
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1/10
Absolute the worst
jenny-7252626 June 2023
Warning: Spoilers
Garbage. Pure and simple garbage. Bad script. Really bad acting. This so-called movie should be on the list for possible use as a torture instrument. I got to the point where I was hoping that the really bad wind would drop a really big house on the idiot girlfriend just to make her shut up. What a nag! This isn't even one of those really bad movies that are fun to watch. I'd much rather have my wisdom teeth removed without pain killers because it wouldn't be as bad this piece of trash. And I still have 100+ characters to waste so I can post how bad this movie really is -- my warning is run and do not even waste a single second on this trash.
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2/10
Another example of SyFy snatching dismal from the jaws of good
kirachloe16 September 2023
Sadly, an example of what SyFy still does today.

Good plot concept, even unique. What a chance to do something really great! Decent actors in front of the camera, and the guys behind the cameras obviously know what they are doing.

Yet the plot is so poorly implemented as to be beyond belief. Did no on review the script before taking on the movie? Did no one think to send it back for a revision or 12?

What's more, and this is CLASSIC SyFy, the stages are absolute junk. 'Oh wow, the actor is using one thing that looks so futuristic and space age' ... yet the rest of the staging and scenery is complete sparse garbage. And you thought that was OK?

I understand that this as much driven by the script writers (calling them that is being overly kind) with their staging and SyFy management, that can't get out of their way in making a mess of everything good they touch.
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10/10
brilliance
vik-fawcett8528 September 2014
There are no words to describe how amazing this film is. I watched it today with a boy with severe learning difficulties & because of the films simple script and diabolical scientifically inaccurate plot he was able to understand it. He clapped a lot and was very happy. I recommend this film for anyone who likes to be patronized for long periods of time. The CGI effects are breath taking. The only down point in this romantic comedy is the odd sub plot involving the wind or something. Why this film didn't receive an imax release is beond me. Also the dudes in the film wore headsets with no earpiece and this one dude didn't have one at all yet could still communicate with the other guy despite him having no earpiece.
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6/10
What a crock
handfistrc28 July 2013
First of all it wasn't bad or good, wouldn't watch it again. But for this Scottish guy to review a movie about military and doesn't know anything about the military is wrong.

You know darn well the military is full of over weight enlisted. All military movies by law have to have some kind of flaw in the movie, wrong uniform, setup of uniform far as rank on the wrong side, rank upside down etc.LONG HAIR....

The movie was based on military aircraft experience, well they are not going to use a real aircraft, top secret on a movie..

I hate when people talk crap about military and have never served
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6/10
Not bad !
vibe-3891517 July 2020
A good Sci-Fi, as it foretells what could happen if we mess with the Jet Stream, which is Real and off course at present, and will cause our Extinction, check the science, the bad reviewers go back to watching your Zomby films !
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