Dennis Waterman credited as playing...
Gerry Standing
- [first lines]
- Gerry Standing: Why did you kill him, Mehtin?
- Mehtin Topal: I didn't.
- Gerry Standing: You're lying.
- Mehtin Topal: Look, I admit I was a bad man ten years ago.
- Gerry Standing: You were a heroin smuggling sociopath who killed Sean Docherty.
- Mehtin Topal: I didn't even know the guy. He was a poet, apparently; yeah, come on, do I look like I need the rhyme?
- Det.Supt.Sandra Pullman: His body was found in your yard.
- Mehtin Topal: You found a poet on my patch, and used it as an excuse to sniff around and bring me down on a whole lot of other stuff. But you never charged me for the murder, and I'm walking out of here in nine months; so go suck on that.
- Det.Supt.Sandra Pullman: Sean was bludgeoned to death and then set alight in your yard between ten and ten thirty p.m. on March the twenty-ninth 2002.
- Mehtin Topal: If you say so.
- Det.Supt.Sandra Pullman: And yet you weren't even in London according to your chauffeur, Emray.
- Mehtin Topal: I was driving up to Newcastle.
- Det.Supt.Sandra Pullman: He stuck to that story for ten years.
- Mehtin Topal: He's a good lad. I must remember to buy him a drink when I get out.
- Det.Supt.Sandra Pullman: You'll have a job; he's gone into witness protection. However, before he went, he broke your alibi.
- Gerry Standing: So go suck on *that*.
- Gerry Standing: You're only saying that cause you want to get into her Alans.
- Brian Lane: Eh?
- Gerry Standing: Cockney poetry. Alan Wickers. Work it out.
- [last lines]
- Gerry Standing: We got a result. 'All's well that ends well.'
- Brian Lane: Huh. That's Shakespeare, you know.
- Gerry Standing: I know; I bloody love poetry. You know when I went to see Alice? She was ready to give me a right ear-bashing. One line of verse and she melted. It's bloody Viagra, that stuff.
- Brian Lane: Told you.
- Gerry Standing: Yeah. Wasted on the likes of you.
- Brian Lane: [to Gerry] Any luck?
- Gerry Standing: I don't know; women today!
- Steve McAndrew: Maybe it's your technique, Gerry.
- Gerry Standing: Nothing wrong with *my* technique, Thistleface.