- Shawn Spencer: ...your next runaway smash reality show about the crabbing industry called, wait for it,
- [to Gus]
- Shawn Spencer: you wait for it, America's Got Crabs.
- Jay Gianukos: That's brilliant! I like it, there's something there. You and I are gonna talk about this later, over a big baked potato.
- Jay Gianukos: I don't understand. I birthed this show. It came from my loins, and no one's gonna screw this up!
- Shawn Spencer: We're not gonna screw your loins... I mean, no. No, I don't think that's gonna happen.
- Shawn Spencer: Can you say *suspect numero uno*.
- Burton 'Gus' Guster: *Suspecto-*
- Shawn Spencer: -Don't do it. It sounded way better in my head
- Melinda: [to Paths of Love show host, after being introduced to Gus and Shawn] Can I still choose Todd?
- Hilton Fox: Todd is in a coma.
- Melinda: I know. Can I still choose him?