American Dad! (TV Series)

Wheels & the Legman and the Case of Grandpa's Key (2012)

Scott Grimes: Steve Smith

Quotes 

• Stan Smith : [to Steve]  So this, uh, detective stuff looks fun. Can I play?

  Steve Smith : Um, maybe, Dad, but I'm not sure you understand what we do here.

  Stan Smith : No, no, I get it. It's part pretend, part real, fake detectives, real cases, you're in a wheelchair, Roger can walk. W... what's not to get?

• Roger : [to Stan]  You're a liability! You know what your problem is? Pappa Wheelie doesn't have a backstory. All right, all you have is a prop. How did you end up on that unicycle? Are you a hipster? Are you a Frenchman? Were you raised by a Russian circus bear? You don't know! You just woke up one morning and saw a unicycle, you stupid hack. I don't know about you, but this case has put me in the mood for some cocaine.

  Stan Smith : I-I get that joke. 'Cause cocaine comes in keys, right?

  Steve Smith : The Legman doesn't joke about cocaine.

  Roger : Cocaine is not a joking matter.

• Steve Smith : [to the Mailboxes clerk]  W... wait. Tell us what the key is for.

  Mailboxes Clerk : I work at a store called Mailboxes, not at a store called "I Help People Who Hurt Me." That store is down the block. It is amazing. I wanted to work there, but they told me I was too ugly.

• Steve Smith : [to Dane Cook]  I don't care what every single person on Earth says. You're hilarious.

• Client : Please, this key is my grandfather's legacy.

  Steve Smith : Uhp, "legacy".

  Roger : Fine, we'll take the case. You're lucky you said a word with "leg" in it. It's my only weakness. That's how I got this Foghorn Leghorn key chain and this bag of legumes.