- Doctor: I'm gonna try something else. Look at these two pictures. One of them is a new ad for Kevin James' new movie The Zookeeper, and the other is a turd in a microwave. Which one is thee ad for The Zookeeper?
- [holding up two pictures, both of a turd in a microwave]
- Stan Marsh: They both look the same.
- Doctor: You don't see any difference in the pictures?
- Stan Marsh: No.
- Doctor: That is an ad for The Zookeeper
- [lifting his right hand up]
- Doctor: and that is a turd about to be re-heated.
- [lifting the picture in his left hand]
- Stan Marsh: They both look like turds about to be re-heated to me.
- Doctor: Oh dear. I think I know what this is. You see Stan, as you get older, things that you used to like start looking and sounding like shit, and things that seemed shitty as a child, don't seem shitty. With you somehow the wires have gotten crossed and everything looks and sounds like shit to you. It's a condition called: Being a cynical asshole.
- Trailer Voice Over: [trailer playing the theater as the kids watch] Jim Carey has a bunch of turds in his apartment.
- [Carey farts]
- Stan Marsh: Agh!
- Eric Cartman: Stan, knock it off!
- Stan Marsh: But it's just crap!
- Kyle Broflovski: No, they're penguins! Stop it!
- Trailer Voice Over: It's Jim Carey in: What ever, you'll pay to go see it. Fuck you! July twelth.