Cell Count (2012) User Reviews

barely worthwhile

[hopla68 · 5/10 · 20 June 2012]

I have read a number of reviews for this movie. All these reviews were positive based on the fact that this is an independent movie with a small budget, no name actors and an inexperienced director and that if you take all that into consideration it is really a good movie...

Well what happens if you take all these things out of the equation, do you still have a movie that is worth your time or not. This is - in my opinion- the question to be asked; otherwise you are left with the feeling you have as a parent when your child performs at a school play; " they really did their best". Now I don't get me wrong, by the time my son performs in a school play I will be very forgiving and proud, i am not forgiving for a movie that takes at least 90 mins of my time and doesn't give enough back for that investment.

Which is of course the case here.

The plot is simple, a handful of strangers with a " disease" ( its never explained which disease this is) are selected for a cure in a facility with questionable treatments by a scary doctor. Of course things go wrong, the cure has side effects and people get killed.

This is basically not only the short version but all there is to tell. The first images of a husband at the bed of his dying wife and the choices presented to him ( either you keep trying to pay the bills to watch her die here or sign her up for experimental treatment) are powerful and set the mood for things to come; realistic choices.

But the moment the couple arrives in the facility things go bad - not only for the couple but also for the viewer- the first mistake is to make the next scene " 3 weeks later" ?? I mean, what happened in the previous weeks, why does the husband have a scar, why is the wife suddenly better, who are those other people? What follows is a collection of loosely tied scenes. Couple of standouts ( there is an interesting vomit scene and you see a flash of the bug like creature the evul doctor uses as a cure, well a flash, more like two legs)but there is no cohesion. The facility - including a resident evil like promo that is played for the, well lets call them inmates, which is cool- is flat and not much of a background. Its the porn set mantra; every scene looks the same because they have just one background.

Acting and dialog feels unnatural at best and just plain bad at the worst and because things "just" happen without any explanation or fleshed out background story individual scenes can be judged just as that and the movie crashes time and time again.

So is this a recommended movie? I read reviews which compared it to early David Cronenberg; don't be fooled, it doesn't even come close to his work. An other review compared it to the equally flawed " Bane" which comes closer to the truth. The movie does have its merits and some good ideas behind it but the sum of acting, plot, no budget backgrounds and disjointed scenes makes it a chore for everyone watching it with half a brain. The ending which gives you one of the Baldwin Brothers for a cameo is half baked and lacks any form of logic; pleads for a sequel that hopefully never comes. Making a movie on a small budget must have its difficulties, but a coherent plot is the very least I expect from any movie.

This started well but the direction & editing made it hard to finish.

[Thrill_KillZ · 4/10 · 23 June 2012]

First off this is my favorite sub-genre of Horror ever since the first Saw film. Any time there is people that wake up somewhere strange imprisoned by any means(medically quarantined in this case) I can't wait to watch it. What is most annoying about this is the wasted potential. They had set up a great premise for all kinds of horrible things to happen & it makes the viewer hang in there waiting to see these things but they never happen. What does happen is a bunch of 20 second scenes in no certain order that make absolutely no real sense. In the second half of the film it seems like whoever cut this dropped the scenes on the floor & just cut it in the order they landed. Of course then there is the final act that leaves the viewer with the same questions they had in the first half unanswered. They had all of the ingredients but failed to use most of them to their advantage, kind of like my cooking. If you do decide to check this out remember to keep your expectations low. 4/10

laudable effort, but why didn't anyone say "*cough* ... it makes no sense"?

[chexmix · 3/10 · 27 May 2013]

I was predisposed to like this film. I like to support independent efforts, because on the whole I think Hollywood movies are pure sh*t, ridiculously expensive bags of empty spectacle made for an audience accustomed to equating an actor's ability with his or her being "hot." Plus, I love horror / science fiction fare, and telling me something is somewhere in the neighborhood of Cronenberg "body horror" almost gar-on-tees I will watch it.

This film fails, however. It is incoherent.

I will touch on only a few points, because there are so many.

1) Another reviewer has mentioned this, but the "cure" creature seems to have no fixed form. At one point it appears to be a large cockroach, at another point it's kind of like a really big meat slinky with teeth, at a third point it flops out of your mouth and wraps itself tightly around your head (for what benefit to itself, I ask?) and fourth, it makes you explode like a grenade.

Huh?

2) Also huh: is there any conceivable point, even given the admittedly chaotic mental regions that "mad scientists" inhabit, for the sudden release of the psychopath characters to "integrate" with the others? A sudden uncontrollable burst of sadism (S.U.B.O.S.)? Please help, I am lost.

3) Aaaaaaand ... then there is the ending. Our doughty characters gun their way out of the facility (there's one guard. Wow), to find a bus driven by Smilin' Daniel Baldwin ready to take them to freedom. Well, er, okay, lucky them, but ... how did it get in in the first place, if the place is so heavily guarded? Meanwhile, weedy young "Mason," who has been left to die because he's been gut-shot, injects himself with ... something ... and is, gosh, suddenly okay, so he gets up and boards the bus. It's all right -- he's just a little bloody, plus (!) he keeps seeing someone who may or may not be there. He can see the future! Or not. Characters "Billy" and "Abraham" are staying behind, because Billy's "cure" is too advanced to be extracted ... oh, no, wait, Billy and Abraham are getting on the bus. Never mind. Then there are some explosions, I think, and someone at the entrance to the facility who looks like a melted Nazi but is apparently an old friend of the mad German scientist. He shoots at the bus. Then ... a ... thing ... runs squealing by in the foreground, and the bus exits the facility.

If someone can "explain" all this to me, I'm all eyes.

Don't watch it. Just don't.

[kristoffermuhonen405 · 2/10 · 21 June 2012]

The movie sounds promising, it looks promising and it disappoints about as much as a movie possibly could. The first 20 minutes had me on the edge of my seat, not because it was exciting, but because I really thought it would be a good movie.

Then it got progressively worse until the very end. The only thing I can praise is the half decent acting and the extremely promising premise. Everything else is awful, what really got to me and what inspired me to write this, my first review on IMDb, was the plot. It's as if someone, after the first few minutes, came in with a hammer and started bashing the writer slowly but surely until at the end of the script he'd simply lost the capacity to write a coherent story. I don't want to go in to too much detail beyond that because the movie simply does not deserve it.

Avoid!

Count me out...

[dolemite-13 · 3/10 · 30 June 2012]

A man and a woman check into a facility that offers them a cure for a mysterious plague-like disease that's ravaging the planet. But not everything is as it seems and soon they have to fight for their lives.

Obviously, this movie has borrowed a lot from David Cronenberg's early films, like Rabid. But where Cronenberg's movies are worth watching because of the multiple layers of the plot, Cell Count is as flat as a pancake. It tries very hard to be something it's not.

While a movie like Cube uses its low budget to its advantage, the direction and script of Cell Count are hopelessly incapable of creating any suspense at all. The unknown cast isn't half that bad, but the script gives them very little depth. Some of the dialog is seriously laughable, like the speech the doctor gives to the husband in the beginning of the movie asking him (with the usual thick German accent of every mad scientist) if he wants to see his wife die in pain and vomit or if he wants to save her. Most of the movie's events don't make any sense at all (SPOILER) like when the doctor releases a psychopath on the ward, or leaves a patient who's having an attack lying on the floor to suffer, just to study the psychological effects. Or the fact that a highly secretive facility owned by a big corporation has only one nurse and one guard. In fact, the entire movie you're waiting for the pieces of the puzzle to fit together. Except, they never do. The serious lack of humor isn't helping either.

After 45 minutes, the movie seems to pick up the pace, but the director obviously thought it was a good idea to film every climactic scene in slow-motion and without sound, except for the (decent) score. After using this trick for the third time, it just gets annoying.

(SPOILER): At the end of the movie, we're treated to Daniel Baldwin, who comes to save the day. And then it just ends in the middle of the story, making room for a sequel that no-one in their right mind would want to see.

I gave Cell Count a chance based on the very cool movie poster that seems to be inspired by exploitation movies from the late 70's, early 80's. I should've remembered that in the early days of VHS, the covers usually promised more than they could deliver. As is the case with Cell Count.

My advise: avoid this one, like the plague.

Lame attempt from someone who needs to go to film class

[afiowa27 · 1/10 · 26 September 2012]

Don't let a decent cut trailer suck you into watching this stupid horror movie because it is a pathetic waste of your valuable time, and today especially, your hard to come by money, at least mine is. And to all you crummy loner bloggers and so-called critics out there acting as cheerleaders for this flop -- I'll never believe one word you say again anywhere. Where's the Roger Ebert review? I'd tell you more about the dumb story they attempted if it had anything worthwhile or memorable to say or add to this genre which it doesn't. In fact, what I'd like to do is get my money back. Maybe I should send an invoice to the producer, the director, and the all those lame critics for the all time I wasted watching this flop and the time I spent writing this.

nice poster, but thats all

[robinakalucifer · 2/10 · 26 June 2012]

I like the poster, but it promises something that this movie does not deliver. The movie is very slow, almost like an art-house movie. But it isn't one.

It's very boring for the first twenty minutes. And just when you think that is going to change........it doesn't. It's not scary at all, and it has some really old stereotypical characters (like a doctor with a German accent)I managed to sit through the first 45 minutes of it, i should get a medal for that. I've given it more then one chance. But it was all just a disappointment. The actors did their best (the main characters, i believed in their fictional marriage)but when you have a script this bad that doesn't help much. I will not remember this film for very long. It made absolutely no impact.

sh*t count

[Galactus12 · 1/10 · 6 October 2012]

This is now the second film I've seen from this director, and believe me, if this were the days before digital cameras, this man would never be allowed near a real film set. I review films for a living, both for a major publication and for a festival (that this film was rejected from) and this movie falls short in nearly every way. I won't waste my time or yours writing a thorough review, but STAY AWAY! unless Troma movies are your guilty pleasure, this kind of amateur work will not entertain you. The poorly written dialogue, to the slow pacing make this a laughable addition to the horror genre. The butt-holed man was probably one of the dumbest creatures to every grace a movie screen. Awful, awful filmmaking.

Bad but good...

[ncoleby · 4/10 · 21 June 2012]

Best to read after you've watched it but it may be fun to watch it with the following in mind:

If you like horror films but you are fed up with the usual Hollywood formula, if you like blood and gore, if you like slimy creatures and just want to watch an entertaining piece, this is for you.

Yes there are bad points, quite a few. For one the script must have been written by a 4 year old. There is no logic behind anything. People make decisions that are outright daft or rules and regulations are put in place that keep you wanting to ask "why"? The main actress is only good at one thing and that is calling someone's name. At some point I wanted her to suffer for shouting her husband's name more often than actually saying a whole sentence, but then she shouted someone else's name which gave it a bit of variety; sarcasm intended. The acting by the others is just as stiff and as a result you don't really care for either of them, apart from the little doggy, he was outstanding! The evil doctor for example seemed to have difficulties deciding if he was German or Russian because his accent was so bad. He sounded mostly German apart from once he used the harsh "h" and the word "comrade", which made me think he was supposed to be Russian.

Having said that, I still think it was extremely entertaining. Despite all the bad bits, it kept me watching and I switch off faster than you can say "unwatchable" when films are really bad. However, I didn't really care about an Oscar worthy performance or meaningful dialogue, because watching this was actually fun. For a low budget film, the camera work was actually quite good and the drab surroundings fitted the plot very well.

Personally I have to disagree that the scenes were disconnected. They were all part of the whole story and made perfect sense to me. Even the end made sense in its own warped style. No this film doesn't follow the sometimes very tedious horror formula and where it does, it handles it in a new style. It isn't ever going to win any major awards or stimulate you into any deep philosophical thoughts.

But hey!

Sometimes all you want is an entertaining, gory creature feature for a rainy Sunday afternoon and this one I will actually recommend for a one time watch!

For Sci-fi fans....

[dadatuuexx · 4/10 · 3 February 2013]

This film was,nt as bad as the rating above to me,because its at least not like most by- the-book,easy to understand movies you see everyday.Although the story is off kilter,it is different.Reminding me of an early work of David Cronenburg,not in camera work ,or ,flair ,but more in a story about flesh,body ,and breaking the rules to both. Just watch the first early works of the afore mentioned director,and your see my point.(sorry Dave,but you,ll never top your first 5 ,just my feelings )The fx are decent ,the acting alright, and the pace do-able ,its the story that makes this one better than the 3. whatever it got here at I.M.D. B.As i said ,for a Sci-Fi fan who is just ready for a good sci-fi,its better than a lot of those giant animal part 7 movies i now avoid. Come on, do it...i dare you.

Great film, brilliant story, and terrible reviews.

[jacobwhitt-600-416831 · 8/10 · 5 February 2013]

Let me preface this by saying that I was pleasantly surprised by this film. I went in expecting a thriller, not a horror, and it actually quenched my expectations fully and with a little bit of horror tossed in on the side it made for a pleasant viewing. And from the reviews on this site I honestly wasn't expecting too much. But I've experienced this kind of incongruity on IMDb time and time again. Great film, terrible reviews.

I'll start with it's strongest point which is the story. The story is absolutely fantastic and was presented almost flawlessly. You can feel the misdirection, as thick as arctic sea smoke, which is the key signature to a thriller's atmosphere. It'll start asking you questions that you didn't even know you wanted to ask. There was not a single moment when I felt I knew exactly what was going to happen next and yet everything was still easy to follow which, IMHO, is where most films (in this genre especially) go wrong. Even to the very end you're still asking questions but if you payed even a modicum of attention you'll understand everything just fine.

The acting was decent. Some parts were a little weaker than others mostly due to underacting in a few scenes that involve gore/action, which detracted from the experience but considering that we're not talking about million dollar A list actors the performances passed my own personal 'litmus test' and I consider it quite nominal. One scene in particular will linger in my mind as the most outrageous and yet most underacted scene in film history due mostly to the writing rather than acting oddly enough. Came across a boorish sight gag to me.

Cinematography and editing was well done. The special effects and CG left something to be desired but I'm sure it was a matter left to budget rather than talent or design/concept.

Don't follow the 'advice' of the other reviewers. This film is much more than the poor (and poorly written) reviews it's received thus far. Watch it and expect an independent film that will delivers a clever story not as a premium blockbuster the AAA studios churn out.

Slow but entertaining-------

[dahauk-1 · 6/10 · 21 June 2012]

I just watched this film and wanted to give all an immediate response. O.K. Short version~ Well acted, well photographed (good lighting, clear image, tripods apparently used for the cameras , some well done PHYSICAL NOT CGI make-up/creature Effects, engaging enough story (tho could have been condensed),could've been ramped up a bit by about a quarter, the pace was generally slow but ultimately started caring about the characters. Not overly creative direction, tho quite easy to follow. Longer comments~ Terrible, height-of-the-action freeze frame ending that worked for Butch Cassidy & The Sun-dance Kid or Thelma & Louise, but here had me starting to throw a slipper at the TV. This has been compared to an early David Cronenberg film, in that there's sudden and surprising bizarre moments that catch you off guard, and are well handled here. Everything--the sets, the characters, the mystery, are all very compelling and involving and realistic...I have surgery scars that look very much like the ones in the film. The makeup effects are well handled and completely (unfortunately) believable. If I had to suggest changes it'd be to ramp up the pace--(I didn't look up the running time, seemed proper enough for a movie, but at times during the thing I found myself saying to myself--common, lets get moving forward...) Director Todd E. Freeman could deliver killer cinema if given some proper budgets to work with--make note Hollywood!

what did I just watch?

[rachellovesfilms · 3/10 · 9 August 2012]

First off, I love indie films. I love horror films. After watching the trailer for this, I was sooo sure this would be one of my new fave movies. yeah, that didn't happen. At all.

It has a very slow build up. Honestly, if I hadn't watched the trailer so many times and seen what creepy things were coming, I would have given up after 15 minutes. But, I soldiered on and was not rewarded. An oft seen directing technique is to keep some questions unanswered to keep the audience in suspense. And we get this from the start (only referring to things in terms of "the disease" and "the cure"). But, the whole point is to eventually at least ALLUDE to an answer. I seriously have no idea what happened. In the beginning, as part of "the cure" you can clearly see some sort of insect-like organism being implanted. Granted, you can only see a leg, but I know an exoskeleton when I see it. Then, as we see more of the cure, it is sometimes a 5+ foot long worm-time organism. Sometimes it's a weird membranous structure that takes over the host's head. I get that we aren't supposed to know what "the cure" really is other than it is a parasite, but there were so many things that just were outside the realm of belief for me.

1.) that there is a parasite that has that many damn forms 2.) that someone would sign up for an experimental procedure without at least getting an idea of what the procedure actually is and what the side effects are 3.) that NO ONE tried to use the video chat to call for help. at the end, that one guy called his wife and didn't mention the fact that they were in a freaking level 55 danger situation

and, because i'm a nerd, I couldn't believe that 1.) there would ever be a gov't funded study in which patients were not told up front what the procedure and what the side effects would be. that's the law. 2.) that a doctor would ever just start sticking his gloved hand into someone's body during a surgery. 3.) those are FORCEPS. not a SPREADER. just because you happened to use them to spread open the incision at that point in time doesn't mean that's what it's called. 4.) that a doctor would ever put on sterile latex gloves and then TOUCH HIS FACE before examining a patient.

yes, i know the doc was obviously crazy, but he was also a researcher. he would never do anything that would at all contaminate his results.

there is difference between asking an audience to suspend their beliefs a little and follow you on a weird journey for the sake of cinema, and just not doing all of your research when you're writing a medical sci-fi script and filling said script with tons of plot holes.

the ONLY redeeming quality this film has is the special fx makeup. and even then, i would recommend just looking up pictures instead of watching the film. very disappointed.

This was... different...

[paul_haakonsen · 4/10 · 24 November 2012]

When I sat down to watch "Cell Count" it was without having any idea what the movie was about or who was in it. All I knew was that it was a horror movie, and that the cover of the movie looked like something from the 1980's, which initially caught my interest and attention.

The story in "Cell Count" is about a group of people who are brought to a facility in order to participate in a study for a cure for some kind of disease. But the cure turns out to be a deadly process.

Actually, throughout the entire movie, you sit with a bunch of questions, waiting for the storyline to initially reveal the answers to these questions. However, when the movie ends you still sit there with the questions unanswered, if not actually with even more questions than you started out with. And on that account, the movie didn't really deliver much or prove to be satisfactory.

The movie does bear witness to it not being a huge multi-million dollar budget movie. But actually, that doesn't really matter, because they pulled it off nicely enough.

But, the movie does trod along at a fairly slow pace, leaving you with your questions unanswered, and you feel that you are getting nowhere actually. As such, the movie does become tedious and rather slow. I managed to stick with the movie to the very end, because I was hoping to get some answers, although I ended up with no such thing.

"Cell Count" is not among the most interesting or exciting moving that I have seen, nor is it among the most boring and lame movies either. It is just below average, and it is the type of movie that once you've seen it you will never put it back in the DVD player a second time.

not that bad

[liquidchild101 · 5/10 · 15 July 2014]

i don't usually write reviews but i felt that this film got such bad reviews. i thought id counter it with my own.

to make it short a sweet.....yes, its not a great film, but if you like weird science horror-ish type of films. give it a chance. it does fall a little short and i expect there wasn't that much money put in to this film. CGI being the cheapest of them all.

the way it ends does give away the feeling of a sequel. but what film doesn't do that these days. but i felt that the whole film could have been summed up in about 30 mins and had last 10 mins lead up to the rest of what could have been a great film. (just my thoughts-- post apocalyptic/time travel)

so...yeh, if your looking for a great film. your looking in the wrong place. but if your looking for something a little experimental. give it a chance.

If you like Cube, Exam, Shadow Puppets, etc, check this out!

[keepitgoan · 10/10 · 21 June 2012]

I really liked this film! has got to be one of the strangest films I've ever seen.. in the vein of cube, exam, shadow puppets, but definitely stands on its on. same kind of independent feel, with unknown passable actors, but the story is so good and intriguing you really don't care. my only complaint is i would like to see more choreographed action sequences. some still camera action sequences is what kept me from giving this movie a higher rating. but its still a mind bending sci fi trip for sure! fair warning, this movie is extremely bizarre, and you have to just ride it like a roller coaster and ask questions later. Im hoping to see another film from these guys :)

Grabbing Story.. Builds eventually but does not end well

[hunterhunk · 6/10 · 24 June 2012]

You can go for this one..! Director does well in moving story forward and building the plot, but somehow in the end its all NOT COMPLETED! I was like "is movie finished?" But heard about the Cell count 2, I hope he has answers to the question left behind. I am waiting for it.

You should not expect much from director working on with grade B film; Now I don't expect director to answer all the questions (seriously), as there are some loop holes in the story and characters as well. But he has done fine job in completing movie.

Some parts of the movie I just scrolled ahead to get to the more interesting stuff. Background of story seems quite intriguing. Gruesome scenes were done quite well... Considering the budget of film.

A little gem, for certain people

[kinkerbel · 8/10 · 15 April 2014]

This movie really reminds me off the nuclear testing that was done in the post- world war era. Countries like Russia did many nuclear testing in populated areas. To this day these areas have very high miscarriage rate. Luckily overall the effects were a lot less severe than they could be. It is still scary to see what government is capable off. Another parallel that could be drawn here is that of the Nazi era with doctor Von Mengelen, that did very cruel tests on the Jews.

This movie actually shows what "could" happen if things go wrong. I am pretty sure that people who like to theorize on government conspiracies would love this movie. The story is told in a very interesting way, where you as a viewer are just as lost as the actors. You get dragged into the story and the thought that kept popping in my mind was , what would i do if i was there right now. The movie does this in a great way and i see myself making much of the same choices as the actors.

Although i did really enjoy this movie, it feels like the director was in a hurry to finish the story. The end was extremely sloppy and it pretty much made the whole effort go to waste. The main reason is that the ending "cut" is just really weird. If they would have cut the movie 5 min earlier it would have been OK. But the direction the movie went in the end, it should have probably go on for at least 2 more hours. I think all off these issues could have been solved with a better idea of a script.

+ Great use of sound effects + Great use of the sets and camera work + A story that doesn't follow the Hollywood plot - The end part of the movie is really really disappointing My suggestion would be to remake the movie and either cut it earlier, or add a second part of at least 2 hours more of movie.

Good for what it is...

[Gstephen70 · 7/10 · 23 June 2012]

Keeping in mind that directors are limited by their budget, I thought Todd Freeman did a good job working with what he had. I enjoy movies without all the CG and huge explosions. This was a sci-fi thriller with a few gory parts added for effect. I would have liked to have seen a more concrete ending as I am left wanting more, which I believe was the directors intention the entire time. I agree with the previous review in that Hollywood ought to give Freeman a budget to work with and make a feature film. His directing is quality work and this movie was well acted while developing a bit of back story for the characters to make them more likable in the end. I would look forward to Cell Count 2. Bring it on.

Not bad

[jhr2012 · 7/10 · 12 April 2021]

Don't believe the bad reviews. This movie is worth a look. It held my interest throughout. It's a pretty good story and is not predictable.

YOU ARE APPRECIATED AND WE THANK YOU

[nogodnomasters · 7/10 · 17 August 2018]

I enjoyed the horror/mystery/thriller aspect of the film, even some of the plot details. The problem is the execution was horrendous. Sadie (Haley Talbot) has a deadly new disease. Her doctor (Christopher Toyne) claims he can cure her in three weeks if she submits to an experimental procedure in a remote secure location. In order for her husband to be able to go with her, he agrees to contract the disease and undergo treatment. The doctor has had the disease and has been cured.

The facility has that sanitary institutionalized feel to it. There are several other patients there also. You immediately realize things are not what they seem and you want to know more about the cure.

The acting was acceptable for a "B" horror film. The script needed some polish. For effect, the camera was a bit jerky, for that live feel and during crisis scenes, the voices were removed which I found took away from the film more than added. Sometimes more is more.

F-bombs, sex, male nudity.

Produced amazingly, but people got lost in the story.

[ActorAndrewFord · 15 June 2013]

Everything was produced and shot very well including some of the best actors anywhere.

It's a new original "take" on Sci-Fi and I really enjoyed it. However, a lot of the audience including me felt that they got a little lost in the story even in the end because the film uses good suspense strategies to keep you out of the "know" on how and why everything is going on, and there really isn't any absolute resolution because, it's really set-up well -maybe too well- for part 2.

With Special guests Ted Rooney, and Alec Baldwin it's a sure winner especially, when Alec Baldwin comes in at the end to save the day sporting a few machine guns unveiling his hood as the get-away driver with a school bus?...awesome!!! Definitely ignore the review rating on this one.

it's the kind of Sci-Fi terror that you can take seriously and laugh at sometimes as well but that doesn't mean it's "bad acting" or a bad film overall. Watch it!